Seeing Beyond the Natural

Student: Me … Professor: God

By Tanya Taylor

Copyright © 2014 Tanya Taylor

All rights reserved.

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Acknowledgments

Preface

PART 1: PATHWAY TO THE MIRACULOUS

One:    The Impossible Made Possible

Two:    The Accident

Three: No Pain … No Gain

PART 2: SEEING BEYOND THE NATURAL

Four:    The First Prophecy

Five:     Dreams & Visions

Six:       Seeing What God Sees

Seven: Death Dreams

PART 3: DEMONS ARE REAL

Eight:    Demons Need Legal Ground

Nine:     Under Siege

Ten:      Defeating Depression for Good

Eleven: Suffering for Good & Not Evil

Twelve: No Condemnation

PART 4: LESSONS FROM THE PROFESSOR

Thirteen: Reaping What We Sow

Fourteen: Be Happy for Others

Fifteen:     You Are Good Enough

PART 5: WHEN THE BATTLE RAGES

Sixteen:      Peace Amid the Storm

Seventeen: Faith for the Battle

Eighteen:    Peace That Passes All Understanding

Nineteen:    Speak To Your Circumstances

Twenty:       Grab Hold of the Blessing

Twenty-One: The Mysterious Realm

Conclusion

Thirty Wisdom Keys from The Professor

Author’s Contact

What man is he that feareth the Lord?

Him shall He teach in the way that He shall choose.

- Psalm 37:23

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

I would sincerely like to thank my husband, Oswaldo, and my dear children, Mercedes & Christian for being so patient with and supportive of me during the many months I have been writing this book. Your love and understanding have been the wind beneath my wings.

I love you all.

PREFACE

I was not supposed to be here to tell my story. If Satan had his way, as a young child I would have been struck dead by that speeding car while crossing the street to get to school; or years later, after I absent-mindedly shot across an often busy four-way intersection in my Pontiac (right past the stop sign) on the very night my mother had been grieving over the loss of her brother. When I got to the other side of the intersection, shocked by what I had done, I realized that the main road was unusually clear that night – not one vehicle was in sight. I also reflect on the morning my husband, Ozzie, and I were on a slope heading upwards toward a blind curve when suddenly we watched the big dump truck that had bent the curve ahead of us rolling backwards toward us after losing braking power on top of the ridge. With nowhere for us to go, the driver of the multi-ton truck shot past our side-view mirror, only avoiding crushing us like a tin can by a few millimeters. Fortunately, another dump truck was waiting in traffic a few cars down behind us and the driver of the out-of-control vehicle was able to safely slam backwards into the side of the truck waiting in line. Thankfully, no one was injured and what could have been a horrible tragedy on that ridge was prevented because God had manipulated the circumstances, having everything in place to thwart the plan of the devil.

Satan definitely tried his best to prevent me from getting to this point where I can now share God’s special message with you. Indeed, it is true that whom God keeps is well kept (1John 5:18).

When God told me that He wanted me to write this book, at first, I did not take His request as seriously as I should have. It wasn’t until a couple of months later when He clearly repeated the same instruction that He finally got my full attention. I realized then that this was something very close to His heart and that I must be obedient. As you read this book, you will probably understand, if only a little bit, why I hesitated the first time. Although I knew without a doubt that it was God’s will and I truly desired to please Him, I couldn't help but unload a series of concerns at Him. I said things like: But people will think I’m weird, Lord; I would look foolish; They will judge me based on what You, Yourself, have allowed me to see; They wouldn’t understand.

He offered just one response: Your only thought should be obedience to me – not what others think of you.

That pretty much settled it for me and here I am revealing things in this book - some of which were only shared among a few in my inner circle.

After God had validated a certain gift He had bestowed upon me (since I was the last one to believe that He had placed such a phenomenal grace upon my life - even after years of undeniable proof), I still had great difficulty accepting it because I thought I was not yet ready to face the reality of the matter.

As the truth is unveiled, some might ask: How do you know if these things you experience are really from God? My reply would be: Would Satan give you warnings ahead of time so that you can pray for the safety and protection of your loved ones? Can Satan appear to you in the form of the Holy One that exudes the strong, sweet, perfumey scent which has also been compared to or regarded by some as the odor of sanctity? Satan is indeed devious and a good imitator, but let's not give him more credit than he deserves - there is only so much that he can, will, or is within his nature to do. When especially difficult challenges are heading your way, will Satan show you those things in a dream or vision ahead of time so that you can be spiritually prepared? Of course not! He wants to blindside each and every one of God's children so that fear, frustration and hopelessness can creep in and overwhelm us.

The ability to spiritually see and know is one thing, but the lesson learned is quite another. One valuable thing I have learned in life is that any good thing acquired, must first be preceded by great faith and also suffering. This is explained in great detail.

At first, I could not even fathom the reason for putting some of these experiences on paper – especially the ones that had to do with “the gift”, but then the Lord made it clear to me: He wants you to know that He searches for the heart that is pure, eager to know Him intimately, and loves Him unconditionally in spite of everything it sees in the natural. The person who has such a heart can experience the supernatural in ways he never before realized or imagined.

Sadly, few Christians today experience the magnificence of the supernatural realm simply because of a passive attitude, dim perspective, and a mere complacency toward the things of God. If you really want to see beyond the natural, you have selected the right literature for guidance. It contains the knowledge and insight that God Himself, the Professor, has taught me, His student, and wants to teach you as well.

PART 1

PATHWAY TO THE MIRACULOUS

We must pay more careful attention therefore, to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away. For if the message spoken by angels was binding and every violation and disobedience received its just punishment, how shall we escape if we ignore such a great salvation? This salvation, which was first announced by the Lord, was confirmed to us by those who heard him. God also testified to it by signs, wonders and various miracles, and gifts of the Holy Spirit distributed according to His will.

–Hebrews 2:1-4

ONE

THE IMPOSSIBLE MADE POSSIBLE

It was April of 1998. I had just ten months earlier transitioned from my banking job of seven years to a proofreading position at a local newspaper company. I settled for earning a little less than half of what I had made on my former job so that I could finally do something that I enjoyed. I was in my early twenties and not only wanted, but needed a real sense of purpose in my life.

I loved my new job mainly because I worked in a more relaxed atmosphere and was able to utilize some of my writing skills. Writing was always my passion. I knew it since I was a little girl, but never thought in a million years that I would write a book like this. My interests were suspense thrillers and horrors. I even liked those types of movies. Although I was a Christian (saved at the age of thirteen), I had never even considered writing Christian literature. That just was not my thing, but Scripture states that God chooses the foolishness of this world to confound the wise (1Cor.1:27). He often chooses to use us in more meaningful ways that are ultimately beneficial to His kingdom.

I would have liked to work in the editor's office at my new job, but I still got to do a lot of editing in my position as proofreader of our department. I felt so good there, and finally, a real sense of purpose in my life.

While at the company, I found myself drawing closer to God in a way that I never did before. I started to feel His presence around and within me constantly to the point where many times I felt so unnaturally light in spirit like I could literally drift right out of my body and into the atmosphere. It was a truly amazing feeling. God was walking me through such a humbling process during this time in my life and, strangely enough, I liked it. As a matter of fact, I cherished it. In spite of everything going on around me and the dreams and aspirations I held, nothing was more important to me than drawing closer and closer to God. I recognized more than ever my need for Him and I craved His companionship - His very Presence!

Soon, there was a dramatic change in my temperance: I developed more patience - allowing people a wider margin to make mistakes and to disappoint without taking things so personally and internalizing them like I used to. I learned that just as God had forgiven me for all the silly choices I had made and sometimes still make, I must also forgive others and recognize that as humans we will sometimes err in judgment. I finally accepted that fact instead of wanting others to be perfect all the time in their dealings with me even though I, myself, am not perfect.

My co-workers had no difficulty recognizing that I was a Christian. I never broadcasted that fact, but they knew by the nature of my conversations with them and how I conducted myself. At that time, I didn't even have a church home, but my husband, Ozzie and I were frequent attendees of one of the local congregations in our town. Nevertheless, I eagerly followed God's guidance as He performed a tremendous work inside of me. It soon became difficult for me to even casually speak with someone without throwing in a line or two about how good God is. I was in the process of learning how to trust and obey Him as He led me on a journey where He would reveal His majesty and power to me in ways I never could have imagined. What was about to happen would indeed prove to be the key event that skyrocketed my faith in God and kept it elevating to higher levels ever since.

* * * *

A Benny Hinn miracle crusade was scheduled to be held in Miami, Florida in April of that year. It was going to be a Good Friday service, and my mother, her neighbor (we'll call Mrs. Jones) and I, planned to attend. We decided to leave for Miami on Thursday, so I handed my mother, who was going to the travel agency, my plane fare the day before. My husband and I had bills to pay that upcoming Monday which amounted to a few dollars more than my salary was, but I just had to get to that crusade. Two hundred and forty-eight dollars, which I had just been paid, was all we had at the time, but with Ozzie’s support, I told the Lord that in spite of our situation as it appeared in the natural, we were going to step out in faith and believe that He would supply our needs, and that somehow, we would still be able to pay our bills the following week.

After the plane fare was deducted, I was left with less than one hundred dollars to take with me on the three-day trip. I had never traveled abroad with so little cash before and truly felt heart-broken. I reflected on the times my husband and I made shopping trips abroad taking thousands of dollars with us each time and really enjoying ourselves. Although this was never intended to be a “shopping trip”, I felt depressed just the same. It was a very humbling experience for me, but in spite of everything, I kept my feelings to myself.

Once in Florida, one of the first stores my mother decided to check out while there sold some really nice items. My Mom, a frequent traveler to Miami those days, knew the city like she knew the back of her hand. She sometimes traveled alone and rarely ever got lost. Having only a limited amount of cash to spend, I picked up a few items I thought I was getting a good deal on and after that, had very little cash left to last me until our departure on Saturday.

Our next stop was at a mall and the feeling of discouragement only grew stronger then. I remember walking into the restroom at one point just wishing that I had more money. I felt like a complete failure and tears began to fill my eyes in the cubicle. All the time, I had hidden my inner struggle from my mother and her friend, but God was watching. I didn't realize it at the time, but the devil was using every tactic possible to attack my mind. He absolutely hated that I was there to attend a Christian healing crusade and he also abhorred the fact that I had sacrificially stepped out in faith to get there. His plan was to frustrate me, but he truly would not have been able if I had not inadvertently given him the power to do so. When I took my mind off God and focused instead on me and my circumstances, I opened the door for torment. Thankfully, God never leaves nor forsakes His children. The door that was open was about to be slammed shut in Satan’s face!

Later that night at the hotel, I took a bath and went to bed with such a heavy heart. I desperately tried to fall asleep so that the burden would be lifted, at least for the night.

The First Miracle

We got up on Good Friday morning bright and early. In a few short hours, we would be at the crusade. As I sat on the bed combing my hair, my mother asked if I had a hairpin. Having cleared out my bag the night before we left (as I always did before travelling), I knew that if I had one, it would probably be at the very bottom of the bag.

The room, still quite dark except for a faint light exuding from a desk lamp, I reached inside my handbag to feel for a hairpin, when suddenly, I felt paper – loose paper – not at the very bottom, but somewhere midway through. It didn't feel like just any kind of regular paper either - it was different. I quickly pulled it out and discovered a fifty-dollar bill in my native currency. Surprised, yet hopeful, I reached into the bag again. This time, I retrieved two more fifties, then two more. I looked in shock at the money I had placed on the bed knowing that none of it was there in my bag before I had left home. All the bills were beautifully crisp, neatly folded together in half, and appeared uncirculated. I had worked in a bank's Treasury for a while and knew the look of new, uncirculated bills.

My mother, noticing my astonishment asked, “"You found money?"

I nodded and said, "I don’t know where it came from; I surely didn’t have it in my bag when I left home."

“How much is it?” She asked.

“Two hundred and fifty dollars!” I replied.

Needless to say, I was ecstatic and could barely contain myself. Later, to rule out any plausible explanation, I told my husband what I had found and he confirmed that he had not placed the money inside my bag. We both knew he didn't have it at the time.

I knew without a doubt that God had worked a miracle that Good Friday morning in 1998. He felt my distress and wanted to bless me for taking the step of faith to attend the crusade although I had no idea how our bills would be paid when I returned home. The money I found so neatly placed inside my bag was the exact amount I needed to pay those bills. God made sure that the cash was in my own native currency as a clear indication to use it precisely for the debt I needed to cover the following week and He gave it to me the day before our scheduled departure from Miami. He had truly proven His faithfulness to my husband and me, and demonstrated that with faith nothing is impossible to the believer.

I will never forget that miracle - the first one I ever experienced in my life and believe me, it started a chain reaction for more. What happened to me that day reminds me of the account in Matthew 17:24-27 when Jesus sent Peter to retrieve money from the mouth of a fish in order to pay their taxes. Regardless of what some might think, God still works miracles today and those kinds of miracles as well - as is evident by my own testimony. I enjoyed the remainder of my trip and knew, without a doubt, that I was truly valuable in God's eyes. That might have been enough to last me a lifetime as I get chills every time I think of it even after all these years, but I had no idea that God was just getting started. That incident was just a foretaste of what He had in store for me that day.

A Stranger’s Chair

When we arrived at the arena, people were filing in to secure a seat before all were taken. We were directed to one of the balconies and found a few chairs available in a single row near the main door. My mother, Mrs. Jones and I sat down and watched as others walked by in search of seats. There were barely any left as far as we could see. I sat just a few feet away from the door and at the time, one vacant chair sat next to me at my right. Soon, a lady appeared in the doorway and asked if the seat next to me was taken. Immediately, without thought, I answered, “Yes”. After she left, I wondered why in the world I had said the seat was taken when I knew it wasn't. A minute later, a man appeared in the doorway and asked the exact same question and this time I replied, “No”. He sat down next to me and we all waited for the service to begin.

For a while, I silently beat myself up about what had just happened, feeling very guilty about what I had done. I wondered why I had lied so blatantly, and - at a Christian crusade! I sat there afflicted; I couldn’t understand it. Why did I say that? It wasn't until later on during the service that I learned I really did not lie when asked if the seat was already taken because it actually was. I was led by the Holy Spirit to give that reply because He had personally reserved that chair for the man sitting next to me.

During communion, we sang a prayer and soon Pastor Benny asked God to touch His people, to heal them. The atmosphere was unlike anything I had ever experienced in my life. God was certainly there in the midst of His people. Persons all over the building were feeling God's healing power and I did not know the man next to me at my right was one of them. Catching me totally off guard, the stranger suddenly turned towards me and hugged me so tightly that I could barely breathe!

As soon as he was able to compose himself, he explained that He had been in a car wreck sometime earlier and had severely injured his neck. As a result, he had been in constant pain, but at that moment during the prayer, He felt God's powerful touch, and something inside his neck snapped. He claimed his healing and was overwhelmed with joy. This man had come to the crusade alone and was anxious to get home to his family to tell them the good news, but before he left, he looked into my eyes and said something that I'll never forget:

“I'll see you in heaven,” he said.

He didn't even stick around to share his testimony on the platform as Pastor Benny had invited those who had been touched to do.

It was all clear to me afterwards that the Holy Spirit had guided my tongue regarding the vacant seat because God had reserved it for none other than the man who subsequently received his healing right next to me that day. Not only was he supposed to receive his healing, but I was supposed to share in his joy since none of his loved ones had attended the crusade with him.

God showed me a double dose of His miraculous power and grace on that Good Friday many years ago which proves that He positively arranges everything in the lives of those who love and trust Him, and who dare to believe that with Him all things are possible.

Good Friday has never been the same for me again. It is now a day that I revere above every other day of the year.

TWO

THE ACCIDENT

After that amazing Good Friday experience, God's Presence rested upon me so strongly. I buried myself in the Scriptures, wanting to find out all that I could about our Creator. I wanted to understand His ways, know His will, and so desperately wanted to please Him. I read through from Genesis to Revelation, highlighting passages that stood out to me. My husband and I still had our struggles, but I had such an inexplicable peace amid all of it. I totally trusted God, realizing from my experiences that Good Friday, that He truly cares about our struggles and our feelings, and also that He could change things within the blink of an eye.

Everything was going just great on my new job. In spite of the meager wages, I felt like my future with the company was bright and I would be afforded new opportunities. However, to my dismay, I would be caught totally off guard as things were about to abruptly change.

Not long after I started working for the company, a strong chemical odor that filled the entire building began to adversely affect me. I started having frequent headaches while inside of the building, constant sneezing and nausea, and extreme feelings of lethargy. Yet, once I left the building either for lunch or for the evening, the symptoms inexplicably disappeared. I occasionally complained to my supervisors at work about the fumes being so strong, but they did nothing or simply could do nothing about it. Gradually, my symptoms worsened and elevated to dizziness and light-headedness at times.

I recall having to leave work early one day because I felt terribly ill and a co-worker driving me home because I was clearly in no condition to get behind the wheel of my own car. I noticed that sometimes as I bathed in the evenings, my skin would have a burning sensation, which I assumed happened as a result of my handling negatives which were processed in my department. With much regret, I ultimately decided to seek out another job. However, before I was able to do so, my life suddenly went on a downward spiral and I found myself on the very brink of death.

At Death’s Door

That morning in June started off like any other morning at the newspaper company. However, as I reviewed an assignment at my desk, I soon realized how unusually strong the odor was inside the building that day. I continued working - trying my best to ignore it - when suddenly while reading, my vision became blurred and I started to feel strangely light-headed and disoriented. I slowly stood up and walked the narrow corridor outside of my department in hopes of getting to the restroom to wash my face.

I staggered and subsequently used the wall as support. I knew that if I didn't hold on to something, I would have certainly fallen because my legs felt very weak. I began gasping for air and hyperventilating, and could not wait to make it to where I was going.

Finally at the restroom, I leaned over the faucet, by this time, weak and more disoriented than before. Tears gushed from my eyes and I looked up at myself in the mirror shocked by what was happening. The tears gushing was so odd to me, since there was no emotion I could attach to them. I was clearly losing control of some of my faculties. I dried my face, then headed out the door to a manager's office a few feet down the corridor.

At the office, I don't recall saying much, but I know I asked the manager to use her telephone. I slowly dialed the number and asked for my husband as he was at work, but as I held the receiver, my hand started to shake uncontrollably and I could not keep the receiver to my ear. My breathing became more strained now. The manager looked at me and seemed to know what my problem was. She immediately demanded that I get out of the building, and assured me that she would speak with my husband and tell him what was happening. Thankfully, the closest exit was near her office and after making it outside, I sat a few feet away from the door on the low wall of a flower garden, still gasping for air. I thought I was going to die that day.

Moments later, the manager asked if I wanted her to call an ambulance or if I preferred for them to drive me to the hospital themselves. I sincerely believed that if I chose to wait for an ambulance to arrive, I would surely die. Not willing to take any chances, I made the best effort I could (since I now couldn't speak) to indicate that I wanted them to drive me instead.

My manager and another person quickly helped me to the company car. By then, I could not walk on my own. As we drove, I looked outside the window and although we took routes my husband and I had traveled scores, if not hundreds of times, nowhere was familiar to me. I hadn't the slightest clue where I was. I was now severely disoriented and I remember as I sat in the back seat still gasping for air, everything around me and everyone I knew and loved, gradually seemed more and more distant. Right then, I knew I was going to die. I felt overwhelming sadness, especially as I thought of leaving my loved ones and not even getting the chance to say goodbye. At the point of my despair, suddenly, a familiar hymn popped into my head and since I could not speak, I mentally sang the words to the song that goes:

“You are the Lord that healeth me. You are the Lord my healer…”

Over and over again the chorus of that song played in my mind and soon an inexplicable peace overwhelmed me. Soon, we pulled up in front of a private clinic and I was helped inside. When we first arrived, I remember my manager asking me if I had ever been there before. I looked around at the street and then at the building, and shook my head to indicate that I hadn't. At the time, due to my disoriented state, I didn't realize it, but I had been in that very clinic a few times prior to that.

They helped me to a chair inside the crowded clinic and the manager quickly headed to the front desk and told the receptionist that they had a chemical inhalation emergency. Someone showed up at the door which led inside the waiting room area and informed my manager that they could not treat chemical inhalation there. She was advised to take me to the nearest hospital.

It felt like it took forever for us to drive from work to that clinic in spite of the good speed we were going. Fortunately, the distance from the clinic to the nearest hospital was roughly a minute or two away. The entire journey seemed like hours to me and I was amazed that I was able to hold on for so long.

We made it to the hospital's Emergency Room and I was quickly wheeled to the back. A male nurse tended to me while my manager filled out all of the necessary paperwork. Slowly, but surely, as I awaited the doctor's arrival, my breathing became less strained. I was gradually regaining my faculties and was soon no longer disoriented. My chest hurt a little, but I was so glad that I was all right.

When the doctor arrived, we discussed what had happened and in light of the situation, she admonished me to not return to work. The fumes inside the building were very harmful to me and could have possibly had a negative effect on others exposed to it as well over an extended period of time. Although I really needed my job, I also knew that the doctor was right: My health was more important. She referred me to another physician at the hospital who would conduct a follow-up a few days later.

I truly believe that only the grace of God saved me that day and I believe He rescued me the very moment the words of that song entered my mind. As I felt my spirit on the verge of leaving my body, I knew that God was the only one who could save me... and He did.

I never returned to the newspaper company and to make a long story short, I was subsequently referred to an ENT specialist, a neurosurgeon, and a lung specialist. In the end, among other ailments, the last specialist who treated me over the course of several months indicated that the airway flow to my lungs had been drastically reduced by approximately forty percent (40%). He also stated that my condition was permanent and irreversible, and that there was nothing more he could do for me. I was referred to yet another physician who substantiated the same.

I was just twenty-six years old when the accident occurred.

THREE

NO PAIN … NO GAIN

After the accident, I noticed that little by little, God was molding and shaping me - that my spiritual disposition and character really mattered to Him. The desired result was something I welcomed, however, I did not realize, that the Potter (God) would have to turn up the heat on the clay (me) in order to shape and mold me into the beautiful, intricate work of art He had in mind. Over the course of time as the pressure mounted, my flesh screamed, ‘"No!", but my spirit exclaimed, ‘"Yes!".

See, when God created each and every one of us, He had already designed a magnificent work of art. Upon entering this world, however, our inner man instantly became contaminated because of the first sin, in addition to the iniquities that ran throughout our generational bloodlines. Each of us would have needed a spiritual adjustment which would only occur after we, of our own accord, repented and received Jesus Christ into our hearts as Lord and Savior (John 3:16).

Embarking upon the process of renewing our minds should come next. Scripture states in Romans 12:22: And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God. After salvation, comes the renewal process. This is something that we must engage in so that we live Christ-like, and those that are lost would see the love of God as a light shining within and through us. In fact, we absolutely cannot and will not live a victorious life - in every area of life - if our minds are not renewed.

An old mind-set is attached to the life of sin a person lived before giving his heart and soul to Christ. That mind-set cannot help in his present nor in his future. It can only weigh him down and influence him to drift back into sin and into the lifestyle he knew before he accepted the Lord Jesus Christ as his Savior. The way a person's mind can be renewed is by studying the Word of God and applying the principles contained therein to his or her everyday life. Consistent prayer is also a key element in the process. This is a constant, ongoing endeavor that produces absolutely marvelous results along the way. There is no other means to achieve a newness of spirit and soul, just as there is no other way of salvation except by repentance to and acceptance of our Lord Jesus Christ.

God molding us is a part of our human journey and that is why living for Him and drawing closer to Him daily through prayer, praise and the studying of His Word is so essential. Life outside of God is tough enough, but when we are in God, we have a special covering - a divine shield of protection that surrounds us. As we learn the things He wants to teach us throughout this journey of life, we would be well-equipped to endure the occasional heat that is necessary for our growth, and little by little, day by day, we are propelled forward into true success in every area of our lives.

I once read a statement that Padre Pio (a revered Catholic Priest, now deceased) - who had been a recipient of the holy stigmata - had made. He said: "In order to attract us, the Lord grants us many graces that we believe can easily obtain heaven for us. We do not know, however, that in order to grow, we need hard bread, the cross, humiliation, trials and denials." - (http://www.ewtn.com/padrepio/mystic/index.htm). I came across that statement much later in life and reflecting upon my own journey, could not deny the truth contained in those words.

Padre Pio functioned in the miraculous healing anointing of God that remained gloriously upon him until the day he passed on. He, himself, was no stranger to affliction. Throughout his life, he suffered poor health and it was reported that for fifty years he endured the pain associated with the wounds of the stigmata. He prayed for the healing of many who miraculously recovered, but his own suffering was never his focus. In fact, he was honored to have suffered in the manner in which he did as it served as a constant reminder to him and everyone around him of the price Jesus paid for all of us on the cross. Apart from physical affliction, Padre Pio was scrutinized, criticized (even by some of his own faith), and allegedly endured a degree of shame due to the visible wounds which he oftentimes kept concealed. In spite of all his hardships, the humble priest had a famous saying: "Pray, hope and don't worry".” He emphasized that Christians should recognize God in all things and desire above everything to do God's will.

Friends, it is a spirit of humility and love that will bring us through our tough times. Although a great man of faith and powerfully used by God, suffering both physically and spiritually was a major part of Padre Pio's existence. It is said that he believed the love of God is inseparable from suffering and that suffering all things for the sake of God is the way for the soul to reach God - (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pio_of_Pietrelcina). I agree wholeheartedly. If we are to follow Christ, we must first take up our own cross. Jesus said: If anyone would come after Me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow Me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it. (Matt. 16:24-5) We must be willing to deny self and be prepared to endure hardships for the sake of good.

Betty Wright sang a secular song back in the day titled, No Pain, No Gain. To a large degree, that statement is very true. In our human nature, we all want benefits - indeed God's best, but we don't want to have to go through anything difficult or challenging in order to get them. We'd much prefer to have everything handed to us on a silver platter - for wonderful things to come to us easily. However, that is not the way God designed the universe to function. We truly have to give something in order to get something and go through something in order to achieve something. If we always got everything we wanted so easily, we would be spoiled and our capacity to appreciate anything would be greatly diminished. This is often seen in children whose parents consistently give them everything they ask for.

As I reflect on the tough times I have had throughout my lifetime, as difficult and painful as they were, I can now appreciate those experiences. As long as we are alive, there will, from time to time, be challenges that we must face, but I realize that I am who I am today and have the tools required for tomorrow because of what I learned while weathering the storms.

Weathering the Storm

Life was quite difficult for me following my industrial accident. In addition to having no job, dealing with a major health issue made everything seem a thousand times worse. It was challenging enough trying to keep afloat with all the expenses of our household with a very limited income floating between my husband and me, and now, I had no idea how we would manage if we could not keep our heads above water.

In spite of my health problems, I knew I still had to make an effort to secure employment if my husband and I were going to continue to be able to support ourselves. At that time, we had four maxed-out credit cards, two loans we had taken out years earlier, rent and utility bills to pay. That excluded expenses for food, gas, and whatever else might have arisen between pay periods.

I sent out numerous job applications and went on a few interviews. Most companies wrote back indicating that they had no vacant positions and would keep my application on file. As no new job prospects opened up for me, I decided to utilize a skill I had acquired at the newspaper company although it was not in my job description there. I had taken the initiative in my spare time at work to learn the basics of graphic designing from a couple of my co-workers. I even participated in a course the company had offered for them in that field. I realized that I was pretty good at the designing thing and by means of some free advertising, I was able to land several clients. For a year and a half, I worked out of my home and God was good to us. He sustained us, even though I didn't have enough clients or business to always make ends meet. This home-based business eventually came to an end.

In spite of all the struggles, I knew I could not neglect spending regular time in God's Word. In fact, that is where my strength came from. I was learning so much and even though I did not understand why certain things had happened to me, I kept hoping for the best - believing that good things were ahead.

When things are not going the way we have planned or hoped for, it's very easy to get discouraged. We start second-guessing ourselves, wondering if we're suffering because we're bad people and have made too many mistakes in life. That is exactly what Satan wanted me to believe. He knew that if he could negatively impact my mind, he could ultimately affect my life. It is extremely important that we do not miss the point that amid the suffering, amid the intense heat, God is working. He already knows how He will get us through the difficulties and He is preparing us for the next stage of life.

PART 2

SEEING BEYOND THE NATURAL

Daniel answered in the presence of the king and said,

“The secret which the king hath demanded cannot the wise men,

the astrologers, the magicians, the soothsayers shew unto the king.

But there is a God in Heaven that revealeth secrets and maketh known to the

king Nebuchadnezzar what shall be in the latter days.”

-       Daniel 2:27-28

FOUR

THE FIRST PROPHECY

After taking a bath one day, I heard an authoritative, yet gentle voice so clearly within my spirit say: “When you have a child, her name must be Mercedes.” As strange as this was for me, I knew what I heard was the voice of the Holy Spirit. Apart from the name given, the her in that statement was a clear indication to me that our first child would be a girl. I walked into the bedroom where my husband had been watching television and shared my experience with him. He was taken aback somewhat, yet accepting.

Ozzie and I had been married for five years at that time and I was not yet ready to start a family. I wanted us to first acquire certain things like a house, a healthy financial disposition, etc. before any children came along. However, one year later, I started to feel like I was finally ready to have a baby. We put a small down payment on a piece of vacant land we had seen advertised in the newspaper and were confident that our financial situation would improve. We desperately wanted a home of our own and trusted that God would work everything out for us.

Before long, I had conceived. Considering that I had previously been trying to prevent getting pregnant for six years, two weeks was all it took! Ozzie and I were elated. Keeping in mind the prophecy I had been given one year earlier, from my very first visit to the OBGYN, I told her that I was carrying a baby girl. She asked me if that was my preference and I responded that I really didn't have a preference: I just knew it was a girl. At that early stage in my pregnancy, there was no way the doctor could detect the gender of the fetus by ultrasound, but that was okay for my husband and me because we really did not need that confirmation. God's Word was good enough.

After much time had passed, the gender still could not be detected. Nevertheless, almost like a scorched record, I kept telling the doctor with every bit of confidence that our baby was, in fact, a girl. Many times, she just smiled.

Several months later, legal work on the land seemed to be taking forever to complete. Our attorney did not move very quickly with the property situation nor with the case I had filed against my former employer. Life was even more stressful for me especially since I would be giving birth soon and things were not unfolding as we had planned...again. In spite of this, I remained hopeful that everything would eventually work out. I couldn't be more wrong. In the end, nothing turned out as my husband and I had planned. We learned that the person we were attempting to purchase the property from really did not own the land. The whole thing appeared to be a complete waste of our time. We were not going to be in our own home by the time the baby arrived and we had no idea when we would be. I was devastated.

I thought that God would have given us the desires of our heart and I questioned Him as to why He hadn't granted us ours. I actually blamed Him for all my disappointments to the extent that I really wondered if this “Christianity thing” was working out for me. I strongly felt that God did not keep His Word and I didn't know what to do from that point on. At the same time, I didn't know how to live without Him. He had proven Himself so faithful throughout all the difficult times of my life and I knew, without a doubt in my mind, that He was real. I also loved Him dearly and realized that I could not go on without Him. I still had some spiritual maturing to do. It was only in time and through trials that I became wiser and surpassed the childish attitude of throwing a tantrum whenever I did not get my way. God was working on me and today I am so grateful that He did. I did not understand until later on that He had not allowed Ozzie and me to get what we wanted as far as that land was concerned because He had a much better plan for us.

Shortly after the property matter came to an end, I was scheduled to visit my OBGYN for my thirty-two week check up. I had been seriously considering postponing the appointment until the following week because we were having car trouble at the time. However, at the spur of the moment, I decided to still go in. I had no idea that the Holy Spirit had ensured that I did not miss my check up for a very important reason.

That particular visit of November 6th proved to be anything but routine. After conducting the regular tests, the doctor discovered that I was suffering from something called Pre-eclampsia and that my baby was in distress. Due to my elevated blood pressure, she was also afraid that I would go into a fit (convulsion) at any moment. She phoned the hospital and arranged for my immediate admittance, then told Ozzie to drive me straight there, which he did.

Later that afternoon, my OBGYN paid me a visit at the hospital and told me to not be surprised if she ended up having to perform a caesarean section on me the following day. Everything was happening so quickly and I tried my best to prepare myself mentally for the premature birth of our child. All throughout that night, my blood pressure was monitored and recorded every hour on the hour. I barely got any sleep.

The next day, I was prepped for surgery. It was an extremely uncomfortable process and I desperately wanted to get the whole thing over and done with. By the time I was wheeled into the operating room and saw the huge needle that was going to be injected into my spine in order to numb my body, I had already mentally desensitized myself to pain. I had been through so much in that short time-span, that I truly couldn’t bare much more.

I was finally ready for surgery and Ozzie was right there in the delivery room with me. Though numb from the chest down, I could slightly feel the pulling and tugging sensations inside my body as the doctor attempted to retrieve the infant from within my womb. A short while later, her voice resonated behind a blue cloth which had totally blocked my view the whole time:

“Guess what it is, Tanya...” she said.

“It’s a girl,” I answered knowingly.

The infant was indeed a precious little girl. God is never wrong. Mercedes was the tiniest little thing we had ever seen. She had straight, black, beautiful hair and weighed in at only three pounds and two ounces. The really good news was that in spite of her weight and fragility, she was breathing completely on her own which we discovered is not always the case with preemies.

Several days later, we were told that our little girl had jaundice. She received immediate treatment and right after the jaundice was gone, we were informed of a potentially more serious condition. The pediatrician had heard a sound in her chest that resembled a heart murmur. A cardiologist was called in the following day to perform a more thorough examination and he discovered that our baby had a condition called Patent Ductus Arteriosus (PDA).

PDA is a type of congenital heart problem. In most babies, the ductus arteriosus closes within a few hours of birth, which is normal. However, when the ductus arteriosus stays open, blood travels in the wrong direction between the aorta and pulmonary artery. If left uncorrected, the PDA may lead to congestive heart failure.

The doctors decided to administer medication to Mercedes for three days and said that if the ductus arteriosus did not close, surgery would have to be the next option - sooner or later. Ozzie and I both felt that surgery was not an option for our little girl and right then, we knew what we had to do. We would have to go boldly to the Throne of Grace and enlist the help of the Great Physician.

That night, my husband and I sat on our bed, held hands and prayed that Jesus would heal our daughter - that the ductus arteriosus would close up immediately. We had not even given a second thought to the medication helping because the cardiologist could not guarantee that it would. Shortly after we started praying, we felt God’s Presence fill the room and by the time we were finished, we knew He had answered our prayer and that we had absolutely nothing to worry about. We expected to hear really good news the next day. That’s how sure we were!

We called a few loved ones and informed them of the situation. Everyone was so encouraging - particularly our parents. There was also an acquaintance of ours who opened up our eyes to something we had never considered during this time of testing. She prayed and believed with me on the phone for Mercedes’ healing, then suggested that Ozzie and I make a sacrifice by sowing a special financial seed into God’s work at that critical time. Immediately, I thought of a worthy cause and discussed with my husband the option of sending a donation to the healing ministry that I had attended in Florida two and half years earlier. He totally agreed to the idea and I went online and made a pledge that night. We planned to mail off the money order to the ministry the next day. My husband and I both slept well that night. We were standing on God’s Word and knew that He was faithful and just to perform it.

The following morning, we went to the hospital, as usual, to be with our daughter. When the hospital’s chief pediatrician, who was making his morning rounds approached Mercedes’ incubator, we exchanged greetings, then he proceeded to examine her. We watched quietly as he placed the stethoscope on her little chest in anticipation of what he was about to hear. He moved it from one position to the next, listening intently. Ozzie and I made eye contact and smiled. Eventually, the doctor removed the stethoscope from his ears and said, “I can barely hear anything, but I’ll check again tomorrow and see what happens.”

This was just one day after we received the news of our baby’s condition. Ozzie and I were confident that Jesus had already healed our daughter and when tomorrow came, the doctor would hear absolutely nothing outside of a normal heartbeat.

The very next day, we were given the awesome news that the open vessel had completely closed. Our little girl had been healed!

Mercedes remained in hospital for thirty days while her weight climbed to four pounds. She was discharged on her father’s birthday - just in time for Christmas. Today, she is a beautiful, intelligent, compassionate, smart, creative teenager who is gifted with various talents and spiritual gifts. When we look at her, we see a miracle.

After Mercedes’ birth, we realized why God had given her that name. Mercedes means mercy. God had demonstrated His great mercy toward her from the beginning of her life, and we know that His precious blessings will continue with her for the remainder of her life. We believe that as a result of God’s great love and kindness, Mercedes will be forever merciful and loving toward others in return.

My reason for sharing this account of God’s mercy and compassion is so that you would realize that He truly loves each and every one of us. God is no respecter of persons and what He did for us, He can do for you and your loved ones. He truly wants to do great and marvelous things in our lives and just in case Satan just whispered in your ear that you are not worthy - that you made too many mistakes, I want to assure you that God is not looking to work through “perfect” people; He is seeking to work through “willing” people - people whose hearts are toward Him. There is a whole lot more He wants you to know in order to encourage you and build your faith so that you, too, can experience the miraculous.

FIVE

DREAMS & VISIONS

On the heel of that first miracle in Florida, I started having prophetic dreams. I was in my late twenties and I believe it is important to note for reasons you will understand later, that I never had any such experiences while growing up. Each supernatural occurrence mentioned in this book took place after I experienced my first miracle. For a number of years, the dreams were symbolic in nature, and I always had an immediate understanding of the message contained in each one. I would often share those dreams with Ozzie and ask his interpretation in order to see if his lined up with mine and it always did.

At first, I did not know what to make of the dreams because what I saw while asleep always seemed to manifest in my waking life. Then, the only time I would dream was when there was a prophetic message behind the dream, but for years, these occurred sporadically. More frequent ones would come later in life. The more I dreamed, the more I realized that they were serving various purposes. Some were warning signs after which the Holy Spirit revealed that I must pray or warn the person involved; others revealed circumstances that were inevitable, and years later, some revealed such dramatic life-changing events that I never imagined God would ever allow me to see in advance.

One example of a warning dream was when I saw a close relative walking through a new house, admiring everywhere she looked, when suddenly she collapsed and died. At that time, in the natural, this person had been looking into purchasing a new house. She had been renting for a number of years and becoming a home-owner finally seemed like a reality for her. She, like her father, suffered from hypertension and was on medication to control it. Consequently, she had made it a practice to regularly check her blood pressure at a local pharmacy near the area where she lived. Upon my awaking from the dream, I knew that something was terribly wrong and that I must urge her to go and see a doctor immediately. I also knew, without a thread of uncertainty, that if she didn’t go, she would very soon face sudden death – just as I had seen in my dream.

That morning, I called and urged her to go and see a doctor right away. Startled, of course, she asked me what was the matter. I just told her that I had a dream and she needed to go and have a check up immediately. Assuming that I must not have gone insane, she took my advice and a couple of hours later, phoned and revealed some interesting news to me. The doctor had discovered that her blood pressure was dangerously high and that at any moment, she could have suffered a heart attack or a stroke. She also indicated that she had not been taking her medications for a while since her blood pressure readings at the pharmacy had been really good lately. We soon learned that the pharmacy had been using a type of cuff that was not recording an accurate reading. They had not been previously aware of this. Therefore, my relative had no idea that her pressure had climbed so high and that her life was at risk.

She immediately went back on her medications and is doing fine now. Looking back, years later, I am still thankful that the Lord used me in such a way to help save a precious life. That dream came as a warning and with clear instruction from the Holy Spirit. My relative eventually got the keys to a brand, new house and now has her first grandchild.

I knew a couple who seemed to have a beautiful relationship - married for nearly a decade and had a young son. Everyone thought that they had the perfect marriage. Yet, one night in a dream, the Lord showed me the future disintegration of their family. I saw the wife living apart from her husband and had moved on with her life, and I saw the husband in another direction with their son. I knew what it meant and shared the dream with my husband and a close relative. The meaning was clear – even if no one really thought it would happen. These people were both professed Christians, doing remarkably well and had amassed several real-estate properties during the course of their marriage. They really seemed to have it all together. In spite of this, over the years I had learned to always trust the things that God has shown me prophetically.

One year after my dream, the wife moved out of the marital home and a few months thereafter, the couple was divorced. It was the quickest divorce I had ever heard of! In this particular case, I was not instructed to tell the couple about the dream. If given a prophetic dream, the recipient must always listen for clear instructions from the Holy Spirit on what to do. Regardless of what some might think, God does not always want us to tell the person involved what we have seen. Sometimes, we are to say absolutely nothing and this can be a real test of obedience. It could be that telling someone the bad news might not prevent the inevitable. Another reason could be that your injection into a matter would serve no useful purpose as the person involved may be in a frame of mind that is in total opposition to what you know in your heart as truth. I can’t help but think that in this case, God was simply proving something to me pertaining to my own prophetic gift and that’s it. Whatever the reason - God knows - and in complete obedience to Him, I will only reveal those things that He instructs me to reveal.

Unless we have received clear instructions from the Holy Spirit on how to proceed, then we are to remain quiet and watch for the events that will inevitably unfold if the dream was, in fact, prophetic. This happened to me another time when God showed me that a friend of mine had gotten quite close to a woman who was something other than what she presented herself to be. When I woke up, I was eager to tell my friend what I had seen so that she would know the type of person she was dealing with. However, to my surprise, the Holy Spirit spoke clearly to the depths of my soul that I must not tell my friend what had been revealed in the dream. He specifically stated that she would come and tell me what she experienced when the time was right and that I did not have to worry about her because she would be okay. He would protect her. I was only allowed to tell her that I had a dream that involved someone she knew– the details of which I could not reveal, but that, in time, she would come and tell me what she discovered.

Keeping quiet was extremely difficult for me especially during the many months I had to endure hearing my friend talk about her acquaintance in a light that, unbeknownst to her, was not a true portrayal of that person. About a year and a half later, my friend told me what she had discovered. It served as confirmation to what I had already been shown and along the way, God had truly protected her just like He said He would.

There are some things that God allows us to experience for reasons He does not always reveal, but at times, we see clearly afterwards why they had to go a certain way. From the moment I first wanted to reveal what I knew to my friend, God allowed me to understand that if I revealed what I knew at that time, my friend would not have understood – she would not have been in the frame of mind to receive it. When the friendship between her and that woman disintegrated, the devil would not have been able to convince my friend to blame me for having anything to do with it. You see, it is very important to listen to the voice of the Holy Spirit and we cannot do that unless we are spiritually in tune with God. I believe that many prophets or seers, or whatever you choose to call a person who has been given the prophetic gift, have jumped ahead of God and His will when it comes to listening for clear instructions that follow a revelation.

Vision of Danger

Several years ago, my two children were at school participating in their school’s Fun Day. That day, I did not feel quite like myself, and had no idea what was wrong. Extremely lethargic and somewhat anxious, I struggled to complete simple chores around the house. Eventually, I decided to take a break and lie down for a while. It was around two o’clock in the afternoon when I slid into bed. The moment I shut my eyes to relax, a vision popped into my mind: I saw my six-year-old son, Christian, dash toward a fence, clinging onto it tightly with the look of utter terror in his eyes. My eyes popped open and I immediately sat up in bed. The Holy Spirit prompted me to pray. I had a strong sense that Christian could possibly fall and hurt himself, and I prayed for God’s divine shield of protection to surround both of my children. I knew what I saw symbolized in the vision had not yet occurred. It was a warning that something terrible was about to happen.

My kids were scheduled to have soccer practice that afternoon after school. They normally did not finish up until around five o’clock, but that day, I was led to leave home much earlier for them. I left the house around three o’clock instead and it wasn’t even five minutes later when I received a phone call on my cell from the school’s janitress. She had always looked out for our children and Ozzie and I were very grateful for her. In a strange voice, she asked where I was and I told her that I was on my way there to school. I asked her what was wrong, but she threw it off as simple curiosity - but I knew better. We lived just ten minutes away from the school and I started driving even faster, uneasy about the lady's call. Three minutes later, she called again wanting to know my location. I insisted that she tell me what was wrong and with concern in her voice, she hesitantly revealed that Christian had an accident. Panicked, I asked if he needed to go to the hospital, but she responded that he was fine.

I arrived at the school moments later and all the children in the schoolyard, including my daughter, Mercedes, rushed toward the car as I was getting out. They cried: “Christian has a hole in his head!” I can’t describe the feeling that came over me. I was already feeling physically unwell practically all day and then to hear that, I was horrified.

As I proceeded down the pathway leading toward the school’s office, I saw the trickle of blood along the concrete and heard my son screaming inside the building. I found him sitting in a chair while an administrator pressed a white cloth soaked in blood against his forehead just below his hairline. I rushed over to him and he was inconsolable.

When my husband arrived (he worked just a block away), shocked and dismayed by what he had seen, he scooped up our son, placed him in the backseat of our car and we sped off to the hospital. During the drive, we were amazed that the school’s officials had not called an ambulance right away for our son in spite of him sustaining such a serious injury.

At the hospital, upon seeing the wound, the Emergency Room physician immediately ordered a CAT scan for Christian which came back all clear. The end result was that our little boy received stitches for a gash that was so deep it looked like a gunshot wound! There was literally a hole in Christian’s forehead just as the kids had exclaimed. We learned that Christian had been playing on the school’s grounds and had fallen onto the pointed edge of a partly constructed concrete wall. The school had never bothered to repair it although, we learned it was like that for quite some time. Ozzie and I had not noticed that wall in the far corner of the yard or we would have readily reported it as a potential hazard.

The purpose for the vision the Lord gave me of our son that day was clear: I was supposed to pray for his protection. Although God does not have to give us a vision of impending danger in order to protect our loved ones, He does want us to pray. Over the years, I’ve learned that prayer is a big thing to God. He wants His children to be active in the spiritual realm in order to positively influence their lives in the natural realm. He absolutely hates passivity and a lazy prayer life. When we open up ourselves to the things of God and develop a passion to know Him more intimately, He draws us further into the spiritual realm where He is and causes our natural eyes to see spiritual things and our natural ears to hear Heavenly things.

Our son, Christian, was saved because of a vision and a prayer. I truly believe that Satan wanted him either dead, or mentally or physically impaired. It could have been Christian's eye that went into the concrete wall; his skull could have been fractured – any number of devastating things could have happened, but we are thankful to God for His divine shield of protection.

The Bible declares that no weapon formed against us will prosper (Isa. 54:17). It does not state that no weapon will form, but rather that the weapon that is formed will not prosper. In other words: It will not accomplish its intended mission.

There is a war raging in the spiritual realm. Being able to see beyond the natural and into that realm is something I believe that each of us can do according to the level of anointing we operate in. We are spiritual beings each living in a fleshly body which means that if we put more emphasis on the spiritual instead of everything physical, then we can see more of what God wants us to see.

You can be used by God in powerful ways. Your spiritual insight can help save someone’s life - as was the case with my relative and my son; it can prepare you ahead of time for the inevitable; it can relieve your mind of worry like in this case that I'm about to share with you.

After I embarked upon a new business venture, a client contacted me about some items she wanted shipped down from overseas. I provided a quote for her and she expressed great interest in my ordering the items for her. The order would have been a rather large one and I would have been happy for the business. However, I did not hear from the client for some time thereafter and began to wonder if she was serious about the transaction. Several weeks went by without a single word from her and I was beginning to think that I would not be getting the sale. Then one night, in a dream, I saw what was really going on behind the scenes. I do not want to embarrass the client in any way by stating any specifics here, but I saw and heard conversations going on between her and members of her family – it was as though I had been watching a movie. At that point, I knew what she would say to me whenever I heard from her again, and according to the dream, she would definitely place the order with me. I also understood the reason for the delay.

A couple of months later, the client contacted me. She asked the exact questions and expressed the same sentiments I had already seen and heard in my dream. I smiled to myself, thinking that if she had known I had heard her speak these things already (along with some other things), she might have avoided me for life. To this day, she has no idea. I don’t know if this will help my business dealings in the future, but I pray it would not hurt them. The client was pleased with the order and soon after, placed another one.

Because the Lord allowed me to see what was happening, I rested in the confidence that everything would work out just fine. But what do you do when you are in a bind and have absolutely no idea what is going on - when there is no vision, no dream, no premonition? I will provide you with the answer in a later chapter.

SIX

SEEING WHAT GOD SEES

As my adoration for God intensified, I often asked Him to draw me even nearer to Him. My love for Him became fixed, planted - unconditional. The true test of that love was revealed when I noticed it didn’t disappear or lesson when I was sad or discouraged, or facing painfully difficult situations. If anything, it grew more. I watched as God fought my battles, rescued me from horrific circumstances, and held my hand in the wilderness. After I endured my darkest struggles and by God’s grace overcame my greatest challenges, I began to notice that my dreams and visions were becoming more frequent. I was awaking from a dream nearly every morning, seeing the events of it unfold before my very eyes sometimes hours later, the following day or days later. Other events unfolded weeks or months later. I had now entered a higher level of the spiritual realm that I had never before travelled or seen, and believe me... I was amazed.

The first sign God used to prove to me that I had entered a new level of the spiritual realm was when I began to see things in dreams that seemed relatively insignificant. For instance, one night I dreamed that I saw a baby frog on my back window. The next morning as I was walking through my living room, I saw my children standing at the back window, then heard one of them say: “Mommy, look at the baby frog on the window!” That was not a normal occurrence.

Another night, I dreamed that I saw my husband chasing lizards away from the windowsills (something I had not witnessed him do before). Over the course of a few days, I saw my husband with my own eyes doing the exact same thing. More of these seemingly insignificant dreams followed nightly and I really began to wonder about the purpose behind them. In one dream, our car wouldn’t start, then I saw it at the mechanic's shop for diagnosis. In the dream, our mechanic later called and told me that our car was ready for pick up, but that it would eventually need a part that he had in stock for around fifteen hundred dollars.

The next morning, I shared the dream with my husband. When we were ready to leave the house a couple of hours later, our car wouldn’t start. So we had it towed to our mechanic’s shop for diagnosis. The mechanic called me a few hours later and said the car was ready for pick up and that it needed a part called the throttle body, but it was no hurry to get right away. He went on to say that he had one in stock and it would cost us around $1500. This dream, like so many others, totally amazed me. I was amazed because I realized the fore-knowledge did not come from me, but was solely and utterly God’s doing. Most times, just before we encountered any car problems – whether it had to do with mechanical issues or flat tires, I would often dream the events the night before they occurred. In a few instances, I had the opportunity to get something checked in time that might have become a serious issue had it lingered.

Over the years, I had become accustomed to only dreaming when something serious was about to occur either in my life or in the life of people I knew or were acquainted with. Now, suddenly, I was dreaming about everything. These recent foreshadows just didn’t make much sense to me. So one day, in my living room, I asked God what His reasoning behind them was. The answer came just moments later.

He said that every event that occurs on earth (the natural realm) is first preceded by the same event unfolding in the spiritual realm. In other words: What we see in the natural, must first take place in the spiritual realm. That’s why when we pray, we must first believe that we receive those things we ask for, then we will have those things. Seeing them in your heart must precede seeing them manifested in the natural. When you see them in your heart, faith has been employed, so things are shifted in the spiritual realm to likewise affect the natural realm that you are living in. The explanation the Lord gave me is supported by Biblical facts such as the one I just presented to you regarding prayer. God was showing me such things in preparation for many more amazing and indisputable prophecies He would reveal that would make a profound impact on the lives of many.

After the shift in dreams started, more significant dreams again emerged, but with more frequency than ever before. Some were symbolic, but many were what I refer to as “direct”. I call these dreams direct dreams simply because they unfold in the natural realm exactly as I see them in my dreams. I would know things that I should not know, sense things that others around me did not sense. I had information I should not have had.

After the dreams became more frequent, I would continue to share them with Ozzie, then at one point, some of the events in the dreams seemed so unrealistic to me that I was beginning to doubt what I was seeing. I started to think that there was no way these things would really happen. In each of these cases, however, the events also unfolded (much to my surprise) and I then knew, without a doubt, that I was truly given a special gift and that I must not doubt for a moment whatever God allowed me to see. Dreams that portray doom, I am often led to pray about and sometimes rebuke, and although the events may still happen, I am assured that without prayer, they could be much worse. Some things I believe God disallowed because I rebuked the events of those dreams. It is similar to the vision I had of my son where I was led to pray for his safety. Although the accident still occurred, he was divinely protected and shielded from greater harm.

God also uses dreams to reveal “hidden” things. Hidden things could be as simple as items lost or misplaced, secret schemes that could be harmful to His people if not brought to light, etc. God cares immensely for His children and He chooses to demonstrate His love for us in a myriad of ways.

Ozzie and I each had a set of keys that consisted of our house keys and our car keys. We had one car that had a unique type of key that was not only expensive to replace, but if lost, we would have to send overseas for a replacement. On Father’s Day, we all went to dinner and as I wore a pocket-less outfit, I handed the keys to my son and watched as he pushed the bunch down into his pocket. The car key had a black outer shell that sometimes came loose from the inner metal part of the key and the black enclosure was what was needed in order to crank the car’s engine – even if the metal part was not attached.

That evening at home, Christian emptied his pockets and could not locate the car key. (As Ozzie had been driving, I didn't need my keys until we got home). We looked around the house, but having come up empty-handed, Ozzie started to believe that the key had slipped out of our son’s pocket in the vicinity of the restaurant we had just patronized. He was obviously a little worried, but I had a strong sense that the key was in our home and not near the restaurant. I was confident that we would find it. That Sunday turned to Monday and we still had not located the key. To be honest, I was not even looking. I just knew there was nothing to be worried about. Each day after my husband got off from work (for three days straight), he asked me if I had looked for the key. My answer always was: “I didn’t get around to it yet, but I will.” He was growing frustrated, but I was still completely at ease. Then that Wednesday night, I had a dream: I saw our car key on the floor on the side of a dresser inside our house. The next thing I knew in the dream, I was telling Ozzie, “I told you we would find it!”

When I awoke the following morning, I wanted to share the dream with my husband, but Satan tried to convince me, as before, that it would be silly to do so – that what I saw in the dream was unrealistic and would not materialize (although practically every other dream I had did!). But I rejected the negative thoughts and shared the dream with Ozzie anyway. I told him that in my dream the missing key was in one of the rooms in our house on the floor on the side of a dresser. He immediately got up and started checking on the side of the nightstand and dresser in our bedroom. Before he had a chance to check any of the other rooms, our son, Christian, walked in with the key in hand. Curious, my husband asked him where he had found it. Christian answered, “I just saw it on the floor on the side of my dresser.” I was stunned! My husband commented that he wasn't so surprised because he was used to seeing my dreams materialize.

There have been instances where I would see in my mind's eye someone's exact location without being told beforehand that they would be there. One time I was able to see in a dream where someone I knew quite well was working on a small project. I was able to tell him without ever seeing the details with my natural eyes where he was working, the name of the road, which side of the street he was on and what the building where he was looked like. He confirmed everything as being accurate. The reason the Lord saw where this mattered to me is because I had a vested interest in one of the major equipment he was using.

Premonitions of death

Ecclesiastes 7:1 declares that “A good name is better than fine perfume and the day of death better than the day of birth”. I was not reflecting on this scripture when God took me by the hand and led me further into the spiritual realm where I began having premonitions and dreams of impending death.

I was sitting in my home office doing computer work one afternoon, when suddenly, a picture of my dad’s only sister and sibling, whom I had not seen in years, popped clearly into my head. With that, came a strong sense of knowing that she was not going to be alive much longer – that death was rapidly drawing near to her.

For personal reasons birthed far in the past, my father and his sister were not very close and throughout the years they rarely communicated with each other. With the unshakeable sensation hovering over me of what was soon to come, I quickly picked up the phone and dialed my parents’ number. It was my father who answered the line. Not quite knowing how to get to the point of my call after the initial pleasantries, I simply asked him when he had last heard from his sister and he responded that they had not communicated for some time. Convinced with every fiber of my being that what I was sensing was real, I told him that he needed to go and see her very soon because she wasn’t going to live much longer. If my father inwardly questioned my sanity for having made such a statement, he surely didn’t express it. I simply told him that I had a “feeling”.

Several weeks later, he learned that his sister had just recently been admitted to hospital. He and my mother went to see her as soon as they heard. That would be the last time my father and his sister would see each other because shortly thereafter, my aunt passed away from natural causes. After the funeral, my father told me that he remembered the prediction I had made concerning his sister’s death.

I truly believe that God’s purpose behind revealing my aunt’s fate to me in advance was so that my father would get one last chance to see and spend time with his sister before she left this earth. Even though they were not very close, they were siblings and I am certain that they still loved each other in spite of their differences. God has a reason for everything and even though sometimes those reasons lie far beyond our human understanding, I have simply learned to trust Him.

After my aunt’s passing, more premonitions came accompanied by the type of dreams that prompted me to ask God what in the world was He doing to me!

SEVEN

DEATH DREAMS

Having premonitions is one thing, but having dreams of death accompanied by such vivid detail is truly another.

Christine and I had been friends for many years. We were so close that we knew each other’s family and I attended a few of their get-togethers. One day, in late December, she told me that her eldest sister (we’ll call Darlene) who had for years been afflicted with Lupus disease had been admitted to hospital. (This was not an isolated case as over the years Darlene had to be admitted to hospital several times due to the illness). That night, however, after speaking with Christine, the Lord revealed to me in a dream that Darlene was going to pass away and that Christine would notify me of her sister’s death via a written message which would read: She is gone.

The following morning, I shared the dream with my husband. I felt so bad about what was to come, but I knew I could not tell my friend.

As the weeks passed, Darlene’s condition improved and she was discharged from hospital. The family was relieved and it seemed like she would be just fine. Nevertheless, I knew that what I had seen in my dream was true and I told Ozzie that the time was drawing near. I began to sense Darlene’s impending death as if it were hovering over me and the closer the time came, the stronger I sensed it.

Over the course of several weeks, Darlene was re-admitted and discharged from hospital a few times. As my friend hoped for her sister’s recovery, I could only pray that God would strengthen her and her family for what I knew was the inevitable: Their loved one would not recover. I encouraged Christine as best I could without revealing to her what I knew and without giving her any false hope. I know firsthand that God can heal anyone as he did many others including my father and my own daughter, but sometimes He chooses not to heal, and instead to take His child home to be with Him.

Four months after Christine initially informed me of Darlene’s admittance to hospital in December, that fateful day arrived. Christine notified me of her sister’s passing by way of an e-mail message. Note: She did not phone me; she sent me a written message which read: She is gone.

When I read the message, I collapsed to the floor on my knees and cried, “Oh God! What are you doing to me?!” In spite of knowing the outcome from the beginning, seeing the exact events unfold as they were in the dream truly astonished me. The written message part absolutely blew me away! Right then, I did not know what to think, but I knew for sure that God was doing something new and very special in my life, and not only was I amazed, I was also afraid!

During that time, I had more dreams relating to the impending death of persons my family and I knew or knew of. I was still awaiting an answer from God as to why I was now seeing such disturbing things. Death was something I really didn’t want to have to deal with in any way until my own time came, and I felt that this prophetic gift was now becoming more complex than I ever imagined it could be. I confided in my husband who was the only one at the time that I felt I could trust to share this highly unusual knowledge with. I thought that if anyone else knew what I was seeing, they would think I was crazy, weird or plain evil. Ozzie reminded me that I had a gift from God and that God knew exactly why He chose to reveal such things to me. I would just have to trust Him.

My youngest brother and I were both acquainted with a man I will call Mark that worked for a company we did a lot of our business with. The night before Mark died, I dreamed of his death. The following day, my brother phoned me with the news that Mark had just fallen dead on a softball field from what witnesses speculated to be a heart attack. Although I was not allowed to see in the dream where Mark would die, what was so remarkable was that my brother had said the exact, same words pertaining to Mark’s death that had been uttered in my dream! When I revealed to him that he was actually playing out the same thing I had dreamed the night before, he was totally surprised as I never before shared with him that I had been having these types of experiences.

Mark’s death was a complete shock to everyone that knew him since it was so sudden and unexpected. He was out one Saturday morning playing softball. I thought about how he must have gotten up that morning, anticipating going out to the field to play as he must have done many times before - not knowing that in a matter of a few short hours, he would be dead. His sudden demise caused me to reflect on how fleeting life really is and how we all must be ready. I realize now that whenever I have these types of dreams, if the Holy Spirit so leads and guides me, I must at least make it a point to reach out and speak with the individual concerned about the love of Jesus Christ, and hopefully convince him or her to give their life to Him if they haven’t already done so, before it is too late.

I don’t know if Mark was saved. I just hope that if he wasn’t, he had enough time that fateful day to ask God’s forgiveness and accept Jesus as his Lord.

* * *

My family and I were acquainted with a man named Bill, but after a few years, we lost touch. Bill had lived for eight decades and the last time we saw him he was still quite strong, walking and beaching a lot. He was a wonderful man who reminded me of my grandfather who had also walked a lot during his latter years.

One night, years after we had last seen Bill, in a dream, the Lord revealed to me that Bill would not live to see his ninetieth birthday. When I awoke from the dream, aware of his date of birth, I soon realized after some calculating that he was eighty-nine years old. As I had dreamed of his passing in early March, I knew without a doubt that he would go on to be with the Lord within a matter of a few short months. Twelve weeks after my dream, Bill died of natural causes. Had he lived, he would have been ninety that October.

What’s also interesting is that during the early hours of the day of his passing, I was dreaming that he had died that very day. That morning, the strong “familiar” sense hovered over me and a little after midday, I was notified that Bill had passed away during the early hours of the morning.

I take comfort in knowing that he was saved and truly loved the Lord. He had lived a long, fruitful life and I had learned so much during the years I had spent in his company. He was a special man (though sometimes misunderstood) and he had contributed a great deal to his society. However, I never thought in a million years that I would ever foresee his death and even be made aware of the day he would die. God continues to astonish me.

The Truth Revealed

Shortly before Bill’s passing, the Lord had started dealing with me about sharing my dreams, visions and premonitions with others apart from my husband, my children, and a close friend of mine who for years knew how God had been using me. I was being led to open up to my parents and others according to God’s direction. The thought of doing this was so intimidating because I did not know how people - including my own extended family members - would react. I was afraid that they would think I was weird, a fanatic or some sort of sudden mental case. Additionally, I did not want to be labeled a psychic or a prophet (although I don’t believe that anything is wrong with such titles). My position was and still is that whatever is viewed as supernatural operating within me is solely the work of Almighty God and I have nothing to do with it. My passion is simply loving the Lord completely and desiring to know Him more intimately. I realize that He, in return, considered my heart and blessed me with spiritual gifts that I never imagined I would ever operate in, and revealed secrets to me that are simply astounding. 1 John 3:7 states: The secret of the Lord is with them that fear Him and He will shew them His covenant.

Several weeks before Bill passed away, the Lord instructed me to share with my parents what He had revealed to me in the dream concerning Bill’s impending death. Completely intimidated, I asked God if I was hearing Him right and pleaded with Him to let me know for sure if I should really do such a thing. I knew the risk involved, but I also knew God’s voice. There was no denying it. So, one day, I mustered up the courage to speak with my parents about it privately. I started out by explaining what I had been experiencing throughout the years and ended with the revelation that Bill would pass before his ninetieth birthday. From the expression on their faces, I really could not tell what they were thinking, but they did look rather surprised.

When my parents received the news several weeks later that Bill had passed away, needless to say - they were astonished. They also found interesting the fact that I had told them before our country’s general elections that same year that the leader of one of the major political parties who happened to be Prime Minister at the time, would no longer be leader of his party after the general elections. Even if his party lost, he could have remained leader as had been the case for many years, but this time, the Lord revealed to me in a dream that it would be different. I truly thought that in order for this to happen, he (the former Prime Minister) would have met his own natural demise, but death played no role in it. It happened nevertheless.

In less than six months, three persons whose deaths I had foreseen - all died. I must emphasize that I do not have control over any such events nor do I ever wish for anyone’s demise. I cared about these people who have now passed on and pray that they are all with the Lord. God’s purpose behind revealing their fate to me in advance with such clarity served, what I believe, to be a very specific purpose.

Although throughout the years, I had seen revelations He had given me unfold in the natural, I never saw myself the way He saw me which was someone that He anointed with the gift of prophecy. Ozzie realized it before I did and even when I did, I refused to attach any title to myself - and God was fine with that. He wanted me to accept and embrace the gift He had given me which allows me to see and function in the spiritual realm as I simultaneously live each day in the natural realm.

As my relationship with God progressed to the point where I was able to see Jesus in dreams and visions, and actually audibly hear His voice, I cherished our relationship more than ever before. And when Christian ministers did not appear the least bit sincere in their positions of leadership, terribly disheartened, I found myself apologizing to God for their behavior. I didn’t want the Lord to look bad because of religious leaders who portrayed the opposite of what true Christianity represents by way of their greed, self-centeredness and lack of compassion for others. The title prophet seemed to be misused and abused more than any other religious title and that was something that really irritated me. Although I knew and it was evident to those around me that God revealed secret things to me, when He spoke clearly into my heart ten years after it all started that I had been anointed with the prophetic gift, I still did not want to accept it. In fact, I was very resistant to it.

One day, when my husband looked at me and labeled me with that title after yet another revelation he knew I had been given unfolded, I became enraged and told him to never call me that again. Then, the Lord began to deal with me so intensely and made me see myself the way He saw me. The death dreams were what He used to finally convince me. After such experiences, I had no choice but to accept and then embrace my gift. Even now, I am amazed each time the truth of a prophetic dream or vision unfolds in the natural. I stand firm in the knowledge that I am only a vessel for God’s power to be displayed and His purpose to be fulfilled here on this earth.

After I humbly acknowledged my gift, God said something to me that was really profound. He spoke so clearly that His words penetrated the very core of my soul. He said: “You will reveal secrets that I instruct you to reveal: Those secrets I have shown you. I will consistently speak with you through My Spirit and also in dreams, visions and songs. Stay in tune with My Spirit.” Ever since that moment, I have been awaking to songs playing in my mind each with a message for me for that day.

I cannot emphasize enough how important it is that we listen to the voice of the Holy Spirit. Here, God instructs me to stay in tune with His Spirit. I realize that I cannot do this if daily I choose to walk in the flesh. I can only do this by keeping Him first place in my life, spending time with Him daily, and giving Him the glory and honor that He so deserves. The Bible declares that God is a Spirit and those who worship must worship Him in spirit and in truth. (John 4:24). We cannot effectively operate in spiritual gifts according to God’s will if we are not walking in the spirit. Some people who have spiritual gifts are functioning on a very limited scale because they are carnal-minded and are not walking in the spirit.

As I previously stated, God is not looking for “perfect” vessels. I am not perfect. I still make my share of mistakes from time to time. Rather, God is seeking vessels whose hearts are pure - people who love Him unconditionally (and this means when the going is easy and even when it’s rough), and have genuine love and compassion in their hearts for others. He is not motivated by how often you attend church, in what capacity you serve in the church or by what and how much you contribute to society. He is motivated by the condition of your heart. If it is pure and meek, He will use you in ways you never dreamed of, His uncommon favor will rest upon your life, and you will see miracles happen often.

Some persons Ozzie and I have spoken to admitted that they never witnessed any miracles in their lifetime. At first, I used to find this so odd because he and I have witnessed so many. Then eventually, I understood that miracles abound where God’s anointing is. I must state that the greatest miracle is, indeed, salvation, but in this context, I am referring to other miracles that you might be thinking of. God’s Holy Spirit (His Presence) is mandatory in order for miracles to take place. The Anointing abides within His very Presence, so if the Holy Spirit is absent, there is no Anointing - thus no miracles. If the atmosphere is right in your life, miracles can and will occur when you need them.

I truly believe that all of God’s children can walk in the supernatural realm – operating in the gifts of the Holy Spirit. One time ago, I wanted a breakthrough so badly and I heard the Lord ask me: “How badly do you want it?” I then felt an urge to go on a strict fast - determined not to stop until my prayer was answered. Within four days of the fast, my breakthrough came. Let me ask you: How badly do you want to experience the supernatural power of God in your life? If there is absolutely no passion burning within your heart and soul to know Him more intimately so that you can please Him, you will never personally experience His power and favor to the degree that He intended.

PART 3

DEMONS ARE REAL

Be sober, be vigilant because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about seeking whom he may devour.

- I Peter 5:8

EIGHT

DEMONS NEED LEGAL GROUND

In due course, I discovered that just as I am able to see within the spiritual realm things that relate to God, I am also able to see and sense those things in the spiritual realm that relate to the kingdom of darkness.

Years before I ever visually encountered any facet of the kingdom of darkness, God had prepared me for the inevitable by way of a dream in which I saw myself rebuking demons in a heated battle. This was one dream I truly hoped would never manifest in my life. I admit that I was frightened at the very thought of having anything to do with demons as I did not know that they were nothing for me to fear, but instead that with the Holy Spirit residing in me, they should really be afraid of me! I discovered in God’s Word some key facts which proved truly powerful. I learned that God had not given me the spirit of fear, but of power and of love, and of a sound mind (2 Tim.1:7); and that I am more than a conqueror through Jesus Christ who loves me (Rom. 8:37). When the battle was finally on, I did not realize how prepared I was for it.

Although I loved the Lord immensely and had been saved for many years, at one point in my life, I was extremely angry at someone close to me whom I felt should have and could have treated me much better than they did. Despite having confessed to the Lord that I forgave that person, over the course of time, I had allowed bitterness and resentment to enter my heart and was carrying around a heavy burden of pain and disappointment – almost daily. What’s interesting is that although I knew how important forgiveness is and usually had no trouble forgiving others when they offended me, I didn’t realize that I had not actually forgiven that special person in my life. I later learned that resentment and bitterness inside a person’s heart equates unforgiveness even if they uttered the words of forgiveness. My feelings still dictated: They should have known better. How can someone be so insensitive? I cared about this person so much and this is what I got in return!

Choosing not to forgive often opens the door to oppression for a Christian and possession for an unbeliever. In order for a demon to enter and activate itself in a person’s life, a door must be legally opened for him to do so. Many things are gateways for demons and subsequent troubling demonic activity. Harboring unforgiveness is just one of those ways.

As my thoughts grew consumed with displeasure over past incidents, I began to walk more carnally, although I still spoke with the Lord – however, briefly - each day.  I did not know that I would soon be oppressed by a force that was darker than anything I could have ever imagined.

I was in my bathroom drying off after taking a shower one morning when I saw a short, stumpy, headless figure walk across the doorway. As I was alone in the house, I immediately, but cautiously stepped out into the hallway to see what it was that had passed across the door. I walked through the entire front area, but saw no one. Nevertheless, I knew what I had seen just moments earlier; the figure was not a figment of my imagination. The moment I saw it, I knew what it was, although I had never before seen anything like it in my life. Moments later, a cloud of depression enveloped me so heavily that I literally curled up in bed and sobbed for reasons unknown to me. This deep depression lingered for hours until finally around four o’clock that afternoon, I heard a voice in my spirit utter: “Don’t you know this whole thing is demonic?” It was like a light-bulb went on in my head. I suddenly realized that I had been oppressed by the diabolical entity I had seen that morning. Now aware of how I had been manipulated, I sat up in bed, rebuked the demon and commanded it to leave. After that, I got up, washed my face and the depression left as quickly as it came.

Over the course of a few weeks, I could sense a negative presence still lurking around and strange things started to happen that could not be explained away. One night, my daughter and I were lying in bed with the lights out when we heard what sounded like coins fall onto the floor from her side of the bed. I asked her if any coins were on the bed that she may have inadvertently brushed onto the floor. Unaware of having done so, she switched on the light and found that there were no coins on the floor, yet both of us heard them fall.

Several days after that incident, I saw a vision of a man standing out in the open. He was surrounded by what seemed to be small, black animals about the size of rabbits all quickly moving forward in a counter-clockwise motion. The animals were constantly encircling this person and when an opportunity arose, one jumped inside of him. I didn’t realize until later that Rebecca Brown had described a similar event in her book: He Came to Set the Captives Free. My vision portrayed how demons enter the lives of individuals: They wait for an opportunity - an open door.

Realizing then that I must make a serious effort to get the evil out of my home once and for all, I began researching and reading up all I could on demons and spiritual warfare. I knew things were intensifying and I needed God’s help more than ever.

An Unexpected Visit

One day, feeling heavily burdened by my problems, I tilted my head back and shut my eyes in hopes of gaining a few minutes of relief. In that instant, an unusually sweet aroma filled the entire room. It could only be compared to expensive perfume – only sweeter and more poignant than any I had ever smelled in my life. Out of intense curiosity, I looked around to see where the aroma could be coming from, but found nothing to explain it, when suddenly, a vision of a great patch of the most beautiful flowers I had ever seen appeared. The flowers were purple, orange, yellow - an array of other colors, but not in shades that we see here on earth. Their hues were brilliantly fluorescent - far more luminous than any color I had ever seen and the flowers seemed alive. This vision lasted for only about a minute, then was gone. The indescribably sweet scent also left when the vision ended. I remember feeling such an overwhelming sense of love and peace during and after that experience, and knew without a doubt that it was God’s way of expressing His unconditional love for me in the midst of all my trials.

I believe that what I smelled was the wonderful aroma of the Holy Spirit. Some people reported something similar (commonly referred to as the odor of sanctity) emanating from certain Saints immediately after their demise. All I know is that it showed up during an extremely difficult time in my life and left me with an overwhelming peace and a silent, yet pulsating message that God loved me immensely and was there with me even in my darkest hour.

Shortly after that experience, the Lord convicted me of the unforgiveness I had been holding against that person in my life. Furthermore, I became aware for the first time that I was harboring unforgiveness toward someone else as well. This was indeed a surprise. I began to reflect on unfair things that had happened to me in the past that I had no idea I was actually holding onto for many years. I purged myself before the Lord, totally grieved by my actions, and begged for His forgiveness. Then, as difficult as it was, I sincerely forgave both persons I had held captive by unforgiveness. The relief was almost instantaneous, immeasurable, and I felt like a new person had come alive within me. I thanked God for showing me the error of my ways that had served as an open door for the devil to wreak havoc in my life. I cleansed my house with blessed olive oil, binding up all evil spirits and did so regularly until the darkness had completely left. From that point on, I sensed the difference and lightness in the atmosphere, and have never carried that burden of unforgiveness again. I sealed the door shut with love.

After my confession and repentance, my spiritual gifts were further intensified. Before that time, God could only work through me to a limited degree. From this experience, I learned a crucial lesson about Satan and his demons, their deceptive tactics, and how I must resolve to keep my life free from all dark influences.

Unforgiveness is something we should avoid like a plague. It can have damaging effects and even physically contaminate the life of the individual it inhabits. When people hurt and take advantage of us, we must forgive them no matter what they did, realizing that if they are bad for us, forgiveness does not necessarily require maintaining a relationship with them. We can forgive them and keep our distance as well. Some people we must love from a distance.

If you have ever encountered anything of a dark nature, it would be wise to be very selective about what you watch on television, the type of music you listen to, and even the type of people you allow into your inner circle because you are now sensitive to it. Even if you haven’t seen or experienced the types of things that I have, the same warning applies.

Since that time, my ability to strongly sense the demonic is something I have rarely spoken about. I can often tell what type of demon oppresses or possesses a person even if I have never met that individual face to face. Hearing the voice on a telephone or looking into that person’s eyes is often sufficient for detection. I now pay extremely close attention to what I allow into my mind especially since I am very sensitive to both sides of the spiritual realm.

I want you to know that you have dominion over each and every thought and can reject those ideas that exalt themselves against the knowledge of God. (2 Cor. 10:5). Everyone can do this. I encourage you to draw closer to God in prayer, with thanksgiving, and stay in tune with His Spirit - no matter how you feel or what is going on in your life.

NINE

UNDER SIEGE

There are many types of demons and each one serves a menacing purpose toward Satan's ultimate mission. They can be regarded by type, but they also have specific names. The following list exposes some of the various demons and gives you an idea of their individual function:

1.                    Depression

2.                   Murder

3.                   Suicide

4.                   Lust

5.                   Pride

6.                   Fear

7.                   The Occult

8.                   Unforgiveness

9.                   Sickness

10.                Passivity

11.      Greed

Understanding how demons function and what purpose they serve in the advancement of the kingdom of darkness helps us as followers of Jesus Christ to not fall prey to their vices. The Bible states that God’s people are destroyed for lack of knowledge (Hosea 4:6). After my dark experience, I made it a point to learn as much as I could about spiritual warfare because whether we realize it or not, we are constantly a target of the forces of darkness. The confidence we have in God allows us to focus on Him and His will for our lives while He fights our many battles. Nevertheless, we are not to be passive or complacent about the enemy - living our lives in a fairy-tale bubble where everything is cozy and sunny all the time. We're not in Heaven just yet.

There is a war raging in the heavenlies and Satan's main goal is to try to frustrate and ultimately destroy us in any way he can. 1 Peter 5:8 states - Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary, the devil, as a roaring lion walketh about seeking whom he may devour. Ephesians 6:12 declares: For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. Putting on the whole armour of God (Eph. 6:11), keeping ourselves covered in prayer, and being quick to forgive others weakens the power of the enemy. It actually renders him powerless against us. Yes – powerless! The only power the devil and his demons have over us is what we give to them. We are to be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might (Eph. 6:10). And we are never to fear as we are divinely covered by the blood of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior.

Demons Are Territorial

A certain town in my native country had been experiencing a rise in crime in recent years that had been unprecedented in our society. There was also a steady rise in the suicide rate that really bewildered me because just two decades or so earlier, suicide was something that was rarely ever heard of in my country. Most people just toughed it out, so to speak, when times got rough. They were not the type to fold in under pressure – no matter how heavy that pressure became.

Then in a dream one night, the Lord showed me what was really happening behind the scenes in my country. I saw demons hovering over the dark skies and people beneath were terrified running in all different directions. Some were behaving erratically while others were darting around trying to find a safe place to hide. Our nation had become under siege by demonic activity. This happens all over the world, but some parts are more active than others and are dominated by certain types of demons.

In another dream, I saw a large group of people from another land, many of which resided for a time in my country. These people have been generally known to be idol worshippers in their own land of origin and in my dream, I saw many of them gathered together where strange, dark creatures had infested the enclosed place – eerie-looking things sliding in and out of cracks and crevices. These people were not bothered at all by this consistent, odd activity. It seemed commonplace for them. I understood the dream.

Whenever a country or a people abandon God and adapt to the ideas of others that do not acknowledge and revere the only True and Living God, they set themselves up for disaster. The mind is the first to be affected. Without our minds, Satan knows he doesn’t stand a chance with us. Whenever there is an infiltration of evil (whether it be by teachings, demonstrations or otherwise) demons run rampant and consequently, people suffer - the guilty, and sometimes unfortunately, - the innocent. Don’t get me wrong: I am not at all opposed to foreigners co-existing in my country or any other part of the world that is not their land of origin. We are all one people under God. What I am opposed to is persons who claim to be followers of Christ adapting to accepting any doctrine that is not rooted and grounded in Christianity, and that does not acknowledge Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior. What is not of God is of the devil.

I remember a time in our society when no one even feared if their car broke down late at night because the creepiest looking person approached you, he would offer his help and never pose a threat. These days, unease would likely grip anyone stranded at night in their vehicle. Many people are just not trustworthy anymore. Generations have come and gone and so have values and morals. However, hope is not lost: We still have a chance, regardless of where we live to take our communities back. All we have to do is repent and turn to God. We must also rid ourselves of religious, legalistic spirits which have infiltrated the very core of the church. Jesus had the most trouble with people who were more interested in “religion” than in actually having a true and meaningful relationship with God. Once we do what is required by God, our loving Father will turn things around for us so magnificently and we will thrive and prosper as a people.

God is holding the persons who profess Christianity at a higher level of accountability than those who do not profess it. The Bible declares that if we, which are called by God’s name, will humble ourselves and pray, seek His face, and turn from our wicked ways, then He will hear from Heaven, forgive our sins and heal our land (2 Chr. 7:14). However, if we fail to heed and instead, choose Satan's path, the downward spiral will continue from generation to generation.

Demons are real and we have to be on the offensive if we are not to be out-witted and devastated by them. We cannot be naïve to their vices because naivety and passivity are what contributes to their rise in power, influence and oppression.

TEN

DEFEATING DEPRESSION – FOR GOOD!

Depression is a tormenting spirit. It is not of God. Its effect on a person’s life can be crippling and destructive. However, before it can take root in one’s soul, it first has a fore-running accomplice - discouragement. The truth is that demonic spirits work in groups or teams. A weaker spirit comes upon a person and if it is not rejected quickly, it will enter in or attach itself to that person who then becomes an easy target for a more powerful demonic force to enter in or attach itself as well.

The kingdom of darkness knows how extremely important team-work is in order to accomplish the many evil tasks it sets out to do. Satan and his demons should not be masters when it comes to team-work; Christians should dominate this area by far. The Bible declares that a three-fold cord cannot be broken (Eccl. 4:12). We, as brothers and sisters in Jesus Christ should bind together in unity to make great strides for the Kingdom of Heaven.

Before the spirit of depression can successfully possess or oppress a person, it first needs the weaker, yet cunning spirit of discouragement to lay the groundwork in that person’s heart. Satan is out to kill, steal and destroy and this is why depression is something that he knows will and has always been effective in ruining many lives.

I will expose the strategy Satan uses to deceive people to the point where they believe their life is meaningless, no longer manageable, and downright hopeless. Once he is able to convince a person of these lies, he knows that individual has also become easy prey for another powerful spirit which is the spirit of suicide.

Sadly, millions of people over the course of history have fallen into the devil’s trap and subsequently committed the most horrendous act of ending their own lives and in many cases, the lives of others as well. The Bible declares, “My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge” (Hos.4:6). We cannot effectively resist the devil if we are ill-equipped – if we don’t know the Word of God and listen to the voice of the Holy Spirit.  Please pay close attention as I explain the gist of what you need to know in order to avoid depression and even overcome it. Don't believe that this cannot be done. I am a living witness that it can.

Break the Feeling by Making a Decision

I am sure that something has happened to you that was either unexpected or seemingly unavoidable and it placed a huge damper on your spirit. Maybe in your mind, a terrible thing could have been avoided if only you had made the right decision or perhaps the decision of someone else caused you a lot of pain. These things have happened to all of us. We are not exempt from trouble or mistakes. Whether we appreciate it or not, these situations are a part of life and we must learn how to deal with them in a productive and effective manner.

When something takes place that you are not pleased about and you wish it would have never occurred, the worst thing - and I mean the absolute worst thing you can do is mope about it. You must resist the urge to sulk for any extended period of time because then you would have allowed the spirit of discouragement in. You may think that this is easier said than done and I agree with you – it is! But if you do not fight the urge to mope around which leads to self-pity and other negative thoughts and feelings, you will become victim of an even greater tragedy.

To counter-attack discouragement, you must, firstly, employ a sense of gratitude. How do you do this? The answer is simple: You employ your sense of gratitude by bearing in mind that circumstances can always be worse than they already are. The fact that your situation might be a bad one doesn’t mean that it could not have been even worse. Once you realize that, you can quickly reject the negative entity that lurks around after a disappointment ready to dive in and do the damage within you for which it was assigned.

Gratitude is a direct counter-attack to discouragement. Keep your heart filled with gratitude. Be thankful for everything God does for you even through other people. If you love Him, you can be assured that He will cause the good, the bad, and the ugly to all work together for your good. You may not understand how it can possibly be and the neat thing is you really don’t have to. If you understood everything, you would not need to trust God for anything! So, even the worse circumstances do not have to be an open door for evil spirits to enter in. Sure, we are creatures of emotion, but God gave us all the ability to control those emotions to the extent that is healthy and productive for us. When bad things happen, you may feel sad or discouraged, but I implore you to rise above your feelings by making a decision.

I finally got my dream car after many years of wishing, hoping and praying for it. It was a black, sleek Mercedes Benz. One day, my husband and children went out for a drive in it while I caught up on some much needed rest at home. Approximately a half-hour after they had left, Ozzie called and broke the news to me that they had gotten into an accident. He revealed right away that everyone was all right – that there were no injuries. I was relieved. Before this happened, God had already been working on me about not allowing circumstances to control my feelings, so after receiving the news, in a calm voice, I asked Ozzie some details concerning the accident and waited for him to return home as the car was still operable. Although that was my dream car, I made a choice to look at the bright side of the situation: My husband and children were not injured and neither was the driver of the other vehicle. Ozzie was at fault in the accident. He had been in traffic and was suddenly distracted by an incoming phone call. Consequently, he hit the car that was just ahead of him. With that information in mind, I could have made one of two choices: I could have gotten upset because my husband should have been paying attention to the road and now my car was wrecked and would cost a lot of money to repair, or I could be grateful that the accident wasn’t worse than it was and that no harm had come to any member of my family nor to the driver of the other car. I chose the latter.

When my family returned home, I could tell from the kids’ expressions that they were eager to see my reaction to the extensive damage to the front end of the car. They were quite shocked when I went and took a good look at it, obviously unfazed and said: “Well, thankfully, no one was hurt.” I didn’t even accuse my husband of not paying enough attention (although when we went out again I told him to keep his distance from the vehicle directly ahead of him). I was even surprised by my own reaction, but it proved to me that I had matured much in the faith in that what would have been my normal response of discouragement and anger, no longer was. God lead us to a body-work company that did a good job on the car and charged us considerably less than all the others who had provided repair estimates for us.

Employing a sense of gratitude is what instantly attacked the spirit of discouragement that I am certain was lurking around that disappointment just waiting for me to allow it into my heart. There were many times when certain things happened that could have literally destroyed me had I allowed them to, but I was aware of Satan’s tactics by then and so his weapons fell powerlessly at my feet.

Before I learned how to recognize and avoid depression, whenever things went contrary to my plans or expectations, I became easily discouraged (as you can tell from reading the first chapter of this book). When I look back on my life's journey, I see that I had wasted so much time and tears moping over situations that were bound to change - and eventually did.

Once you pass the first step of rejecting discouragement, you avoid an onslaught of demonic activity that you would have ultimately felt powerless under. However, if you allow discouragement to set in, you have legally permitted the entrance or attachment of the more powerful entity of depression. This is when you begin to feel worthless, unloved, hopeless, like life is not worth living, your energy is sapped, you see life through dull, somber eyes. Thoughts that are not your own emerge and tell you that God doesn’t care, no one cares, and the situation will never change. You cannot see the bright side of anything and each day is a struggle to get through. The spirit of depression works hand in hand with other spirits. It often causes what we call mental illness if it has been an inhabitant of or attached to a person for quite some time. Contrary to what some experts think, depression is a powerful demonic spirit. Like its master – it is heartless and ruthless. It can drive a person to ultimately take his own life or the life of others – even his own loved ones. This is Satan’s goal; this is the task for which the spirit of depression was sent. You need to realize this so that when its accomplice, discouragement comes, you understand that you must reject it quickly by employing a sense of gratitude.

If you are currently plagued by depression or suffer from it from time to time, I want to encourage you to reach out to God in prayer and ask Him to forgive you for all your sins of commission and omission, and to give you inner peace. Unforgiveness can also open the door to depression, so you must search your heart to ensure that you are not holding anything against anyone who has offended you. Jesus taught us by the Lord's Prayer that we ask God to forgive us as we forgive others who have sinned against us. What some people fail to realize (even those who say this prayer frequently) is that in order for God to forgive us, we must first forgive others. As I stated before, unforgiveness provides legal entrance for the enemy.

To free yourself from the crippling grip of depression, it should start with you confessing your sins to God with humble repentance. Then you must forgive, ask God to cleanse you from all unrighteousness and anything evil that might have attached itself to you. Rebuke that spirit of depression and command it to leave and never to return in the mighty name of Jesus, and ask God to let His peace that surpasses all understanding rest upon you. From that point on, put Him first daily in prayer and dive into His Word so that you can speak effectively against the enemy when he tries to put wrong thoughts into your mind. Jesus said that the devil is a liar and the father of all lies (John 8:44). Don’t believe the lies Satan has told you that you are worthless, hopeless, and that no one loves you. You are so valuable to God. He created you in His own image with His own hands: You are His masterpiece. Your life is not hopeless because He is with you and will never forsake you (Deut. 31:6). You know that He loves you because He sent His only Son to die in order to cleanse you of your sins and save you from Hell, to heal your broken body and heart (John 3:16, 1 Pet.2:24). If you trust in Him regardless of your circumstances, regardless of the length of time that passes before you see your breakthrough, regardless of who tells you that you won’t amount to anything, regardless of how difficult the circumstances may be, God will bless you above and beyond what you can ever ask, think or imagine (Eph. 3:20). But you have to pass the test. You must remain stable and keep your emotions in check. What I am telling you to do might sound so simple in the face of a powerful issue like depression, but we serve a mighty God who is more powerful than anything that has you bound.

For persons who have been diagnosed with certain mental disorders such as bi-polar, multiple personalities or schizophrenia, I believe it is a clear sign of deeply-rooted demonic activity and I encourage you to take the steps I have stated above and also to reach out to an anointed Christian minister who can assist you in your deliverance. Demons that have been a part of a person’s life and have grouped themselves within an individual for a long period of time can be quite resistant and the person who has been possessed or oppressed may have to seek additional help from a truly anointed person of God to assist in ridding him or her of the evil entities. If you know someone in this position, it would be good to assist in getting that person the spiritual help they need.

Every day, there is an opportunity for us to become discouraged about something. Some circumstances are worse than others and this is why this subject is so important. Even in matters of loss – whether it is a job, a home, financial security or even a loved one, God has equipped His children with what we need in order to survive the storm and rise above it. Knowing that God loves and cares about you, and is directing your steps (Prov. 3:6; Prov. 16:9) will empower you to go on no matter how painful that pathway has become. After suffering, there is reward and God will never put more on you than you can bear (Isa. 61:7; 1Cor. 10:13). God does not want you to carry around any burdens nor to worry about anything - especially the things that you cannot change. You must become an expert of doing the best you can and simply leaving the rest to God. Make up your mind to break the negative emotions by making a positive decision each time. Be vigilant to the tactics of the devil when it comes to disappointment and... resist, resist, resist!

ELEVEN

SUFFERING FOR GOOD AND NOT EVIL

In this chapter, I would especially like to reach out to those persons who have been dealing with constant turmoil and distress in spite of their best efforts to live for God. Many times, people tend to cast judgments upon others based on their sufferings and trials - sometimes totally wrong in their conclusions. A person may certainly suffer because of the wrong choices he has made in life, but one may also suffer because of the right choices he has made. As God has taught me this truth first-hand, I would hope that as a result of this read, those who are quick to make judgments would, in future, leave all the judging to God. We get into trouble when we condemn others based on assumptions because sooner or later, we find ourselves in a similar or worst situation because of it.

In a dream, I was speaking to a man and a woman one night about the love of God. The woman said: “You don’t know what I’ve done. I've done some really bad things.” But I responded that God would forgive her regardless of what she had done. Soon afar off, I saw lurking in the background near a wooded area a huge gorilla likened to the size of that fictional character King Kong. It was looking at us quite intently, then tried to play it off by sitting and playing with a little ball. Once he realized I had noticed him, he attempted to seem harmless and unworthy of my attention, but he looked my way again and this time, took off with such speed toward us that we knew we had to run for our lives. He was on the attack and in hot pursuit of the three of us.

Suddenly, the dream shifted and I entered a room full of people. The place looked like a large garage as it was sectioned off similarly. After I had entered the room, the people gathered there looked behind me, then started to run away. I had no idea why they were running as I thought I had somehow out-run the gorilla. Then a small group of people stood before me and pointed behind me. There were dozens of zombie-like creatures right behind me and I realized that they were also in pursuit of me. They were demons. I continued running and wherever I went, they tried to grab hold of me, but I escaped. Soon, I wasn’t afraid anymore as I knew I was safe and they could not capture me regardless of their persistence.

I awoke from that dream knowing its interpretation as I did all the other symbolic dreams I've ever had. The gorilla represented a powerful demon. It pursued me because I was sharing the love of God with those that were lost. It also pursued the couple with me because it did not want them to be saved, but instead to perish. The other demons were assigned to try and derail me as I am a threat to the kingdom of darkness, but try as they might, they could not accomplish their mission.

I was attacked purely because I was doing good and not evil. God was pleased with me, but Satan was angry at me. God gave me this dream because of what was about to come in my own future. I told my husband that we needed to be prepared for an onslaught of attack - to expect problems that would suddenly arise from many different angles and also for people we least expected to turn against us, to do so and to create issues that we did not deserve.

My dream served as a warning of what was about to be unleashed by Satan solely because God was pleased with us. For the next few months, Ozzie and I found ourselves caught up in a whirlwind of utter turmoil unlike anything we had ever come across, facing disappointment after disappointment. People who should have had our backs, showed us bad vibes. Things did not happen one after the other – they happened all at once! Had it not been for my husband and me covering ourselves and our children in prayer and confession, I don’t see how we would have survived it all. It was a very rough time for my family, but God eventually pulled us through victoriously and things, once again, settled down.

What we learned from that experience is how God cared enough to forewarn us about the impending attack of the enemy. In essence, He prepared us and in turn, we put on our armor and kept it on daily. When those things occurred that made absolutely no sense, we were not surprised, but instead sometimes laughed at how the devil was wearing himself out trying to frustrate us because we loved the Lord and were doing His will. We took comfort in knowing that God’s protection was constantly upon us and no matter how bad the circumstances got, we knew our Heavenly Father would turn it all around for our good. We had no sense of fear, but of triumph, for God would never abandon us.

My hope is that you who are doing your best to live according to God’s will, but are suffering extreme hardships would realize that God is fighting your battles. The key to getting through is to have unwavering faith in our Lord no matter what and to not give up. The hardships strengthen you and build your character. The devil’s aim is for you to become bitter, resentful and angry - among other things - and then to give up hopelessly. But do not be deceived - there is always hope. If you keep trusting in God to deliver you and keep doing good (Gal. 6:9), He will reward you and bring you through victoriously.

God never promised any of us nor can you find stated anywhere in the Bible that life would be easy. I would be the first to tell you that it’s not. Life can be very difficult to deal with at times and even the strongest of us have weak moments where we feel we cannot go on any longer. Think of the most self-assured, “have-it-all-together” person you know – that person also has weak moments even though he or she may never admit it.

There were times in my life when nothing was working out as planned – everything seemed to be going awry and I found myself feeling like I was lost and that things would never change. These were my weakest points – a most vulnerable period when the devil would have had a field day tormenting me with thoughts that all my praying, believing and hoping were in vain. Over the years as I grew stronger in the Lord, Satan found himself in a fight unlike he had probably ever expected to see from me. I fought the good fight of faith with everything in me and I spoke words of life and hope into my dismal circumstances. I forced myself to look beyond the natural and to stay there spiritually until the battle was won. When I found myself getting weak, I knew I had to strengthen myself with praise and thanksgiving to God even though I sometimes didn't feel like it. I prayed for His strength and re-positioned myself in the realm of the heavenlies where He is and where hope, faith and love abound beyond description.

Amidst my pain, I tried to keep in mind that I am building an even greater testimony, I will arise victorious in every challenge, and give God the glory. I had to fight back with the full armor of God upon me and remember not to give Satan and his demons the opportunity to stand in the corner, point and laugh at me for falling to pieces and giving up. Even if I felt like I was crumbling, I had to dry those tears, encourage myself in the Lord by reflecting on all He has done for me in my life and thank Him for the victory even though I could not see my way clear.

Friends, life is a battle. Satan wants so much to see us give up all hope and throw in the towel. He wants us, amid our most trying times, to believe that our prayers and faith are not working – that God does not hear us and does not even care about our problems. But that devil is a liar. As long as he has convinced us of his lies, we can prepare for a very miserable, defeated life. But if we stand strong and fight back with praise and worship to God, employ our sense of gratitude, and continue with the right mind-set even though everything around us seems to be wrong, God’s light will burst through the darkness and He will deliver us out of every situation that ever came against us. Moreover, we will emerge stronger and more spiritually enlightened than we were before.

I have learned that every struggle is a golden opportunity for growth. When you realize that your character is more important to God than anything else, you will weather the storms of life more easily knowing that through your darkest hours, God is up to something really good. Believe me, you will pull through all right. One day, you will even look back and appreciate what you had to endure.

Every Problem Is An Opportunity

It is true that God will not put more on you than you can bear. God knows what you are made of – He knows how far He can stretch you before He slackens the pull. I believe we have all found ourselves at some point worrying about a certain situation – whether it went on for days, weeks, or months, and when we thought we could not take another moment of it, lo and behold, out of the blue, the problem was solved and the stress suddenly left us. When we look back, we might think how foolish it was to worry in the first place, especially since our worrying did not change the situation one bit. I realized a few years ago when reflecting on my life, that worrying never solved even one of my problems. In light of that fact, I now find it quite difficult to actually worry about things because I know that just like always – the problem has to go away. That does not mean that when faced with unpleasant circumstances worry never presents itself to me. Quite to the contrary: It certainly shows up, but nowadays, as quickly as it shows up, I chase it away with steady confidence that God has everything under control and He had the solution to the problem from the very beginning. Furthermore, in the forefront of my mind, I choose to remember that He loves me and does not wish to harm me, but always to help me. And that even in this situation, He will get to prove yet again, how much He truly cares for me.

Every problem is a golden opportunity for advancement in the Kingdom of Heaven. Every time God rescues us and shows Himself strong in our lives, our love for Him increases and our desire to be closer to Him is greater – that is – if we truly have a grateful heart. It is in trials, trouble, pain, sorrow, and lack where God shows Himself so strong in our lives and we are enabled to grow spiritually. I believe that without the many trials I endured throughout my life, I would not have had the kind of relationship with God that I truly enjoy and treasure today. If I did not have a problem, I would not know that He can solve it. If I were never on the verge of losing my life, I would not know that He can save it. If I were never in lack, I would not know that He can provide. If I were never in the wilderness, I would not know that He can lift me up out of it and bring me into a comfortable place.

If you are struggling or facing serious challenges today, why not change your perception of that problem? As much as it may hurt, why not think of it as a great opportunity for your spiritual advancement in life? Why not trust that God is with you and will take you through the circumstance and not just leave you hanging? Why not push away the negativity and start thinking positive thoughts and speaking positive words? James 5:10-11 declares: Brothers, as an example of patience in the face of suffering, take the prophets who spoke in the name of the Lord. As you know, we consider blessed those who have persevered. You have heard of Job’s perseverance and have seen what the Lord finally brought about. The Lord is full of compassion and mercy.

When you experience hardships and difficulties that seem insurmountable and incomprehensible; when you are under attack by the demonic forces that aim to destroy you in every sense of the word, know that because of your steadfast faith and commitment to God, He will never leave you in the hand of your enemy (Psalm 37:32-33): He will bring you out and turn what Satan has meant for evil to work out for your good.

Do not cast wrong judgments

At times, when you endure struggles, people tend to look at you and wonder what you have done to deserve the problem and pain you are going through. What they do not realize, however, is that people don’t always suffer because of the wrong things they have done, but sometimes, and I dare say, oftentimes, godly people suffer purely because of what they have done right – just as the Lord clearly showed me in my dream.

There is actual Biblical reference to back up what I am stating here. 1 Peter 3:17 declares, It is better, if it is God’s will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil. This scripture lays out the fact that people suffer and would suffer for doing good. In our own minds, we tend to rationalize everything and to seek logical reasons behind every problem. However, many times, we will never find any logical reasons behind some of the issues people face. We have an enemy who hates us beyond description, and he hates us so much because he absolutely detests Jesus Christ – the one whose image we were all made in.

Bill Weiss, in his account of the experience he had in hell, stated that while there, the demons taunted and tortured him in various ways. He sensed their pure hatred for him and when Jesus came to his rescue, he asked the Lord why they (the demons) hated him so much. Jesus replied that they hated Him first and they hate us humans because we were made in His image and likeness. I cannot reiterate enough that an intense spiritual battle is raging and that is why we must keep on our spiritual armor at all times. Without it, Satan, using trickery and deceit, can slither into our lives and wreak havoc that we cannot effectively fight against. As long as we live, we will have challenges in one way or another. The key is to know and utilize what is necessary to always come out on top: We must put on the whole armor of God.

Christian martyrs are excellent examples of people who suffered for good and not evil. As told in Acts 6 and 7, Stephen was the first of Jesus’ disciples to be martyred. Certain members of the synagogue had persuaded persons to appear and falsely testify against him – accusing him of blasphemy. The Bible reveals that Stephen was a man full of God’s grace and power and that he did great wonders and miraculous signs among the people (Acts 6:8). Obviously, the religious people, tricked by Satan, viewed Stephen as a threat. They hated the glory that was upon him and they hated Jesus whom he represented. Therefore, Stephen was stoned to death. He was not guilty of any wrongdoing, yet was viciously killed. Can we find any good, logical reasoning behind his death from the viewpoint of those who despised him and wrongly accused him? Of course not! And many other persons became martyrs simply because of their love for and commitment to serve God.

So often we look at those around us who seem to be enduring struggle after struggle, trial after trial and draw the conclusion that they must have done something terribly wrong to deserve what they are going through. Yet when our time comes, we're quick to cry out: "This just isn't fair; I don't deserve this! Lord, why me?" It is so often that we are wrong in our assessment of others and that is why it’s crucial that we leave the judging to the true Judge which is God Almighty. He knows all things and the reasons behind everything that ever happens.

As children of God, we should learn to trust Him in spite of what we do not understand – that is where love and faith come in. Just think about it: If we knew all things and understood all things, we would be sovereign like God, but we are not. We were created in His image, but there is only one sovereign God - that is Who we serve, trust and believe always works out everything for our good regardless of what we can or cannot understand.

It has been reported that for years Muslim extremists have been persecuting and killing Christians in Nigeria and Sudan. There have been planned massacres and the innocents thereafter buried in mass graves. Some pierced by swords, hacked to death with machetes and a large number of women and children have been killed. In the Nuba mountains, Christians are reportedly tormented daily by air strikes and house raids, and soldiers burning down churches. Many Christians even in Pakistan are persecuted simply because of their faith and commitment to God. What fuels their persecution is a combination of malice, hatred and ignorance. Satan has deceived the perpetrators into believing that they are doing something honorable by torturing and wiping out the Christians. Christians living in such territories do not have freedom of speech to express their beliefs without often suffering brutal consequences, yet they sometimes take fatal chances because of their love for God. Through it all, God gives them the grace they need to endure the trials and the hardships just as He gives each of us the grace we need to deal with our own daily struggles. Many Christians suffer for good and the Bible promises not only deliverance in whatsoever form God chooses, but also reward.

Our Reward Is Coming

While in the glorious Presence of God one day, I had the most remarkable visitation. I was in the process of saying the twenty-third Psalm when suddenly, Jesus stood behind me. I immediately felt such love emanating from His Presence, it was truly overwhelming. He then gently lowered a very tall, brilliantly white crown upon my head. It was unusually tall for a crown and the white was shades and shades whiter than anything I have ever seen on earth. As the crown touched my head, I saw His hands on both sides of it and I reached up and carefully positioned my hands on top of His. I cannot possibly describe what went through me as I did this. Then, all of a sudden, I realized that I had been sitting at a small table in an otherwise empty room and as I looked out in front of me, a golden liquid spilled over from my head, onto the table, and then onto the floor. As far as I could see ahead of me and on both sides, the floor was covered with thick blocks of gold – a golden color I had also never seen before. It was a stunning, rich hue with such depth that I sensed it held great power inside. I was entranced by what I saw.

I knew right there and then that the crown represented my future reward which proved that He was pleased with me in spite of my imperfections. He had seen my heart and it was pure. The golden liquid that supernaturally changed to tile-like bricks of actual gold represented prosperity in some form, and the room I was in where the tile-like gold could be seen all over its floor represented my borders and territories. Jabez prayed in 1 Chronicles 4:10 Oh, that you would bless me indeed and enlarge my territory...

Each of us has earthly borders or territories. Your borders could encompass the entire world if that is what God has pre-destined for your life. Your borders could be your community or State, but wherever they are is where your influence and productivity will lie. God will bless you to be a blessing within your borders. He has a special crown ready for each of us who walks according to His will, who lives free from guilt and condemnation, and continuously presses toward the mark of the high calling in Jesus Christ. Paul states in Philippians 3:12-14: Not that I have already obtained all this or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

In order to obtain this prize or crown, our hearts must be pure. We must not be polluted by critical thinking, judgmental attitudes, selfishness, and unforgiveness. We must endure and endure in the right spirit (with the right attitude) keeping our eyes on the prize. James 1:12 declares: Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him. The crown here represents eternal life with God. We all want to receive that crown. It is our reward.

The problem with some believers today is they have a flat-out “all for me” attitude. The reason why God gave us borders and territories is so that we can reach out and be a blessing to those around us. We are supposed to be our brother’s keeper, yet far too many of us are not. We turn a blind eye to the needs and hardships of others when we know we can do our little part to help. When people are suffering, do we really care or are we just quick to cast judgments since we don’t currently find ourselves in a similar situation as theirs?

Those who harbor religious spirits (critical, judgmental, and condemn those who suffer many trials), I want you to note that Scripture states: Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all (Psalm 34:19). Perhaps, if you are not being attacked in any way, it’s because your life is more pleasing to Satan than it is to God. Search yourself and make the necessary adjustments.

On the other hand, if you are a victim of disdain and belittlement by others - especially those of our Christian faith - remember that God is your vindicator. You have nothing to prove to anyone except to show them the love that Jesus demonstrated for us all. Your only thought (as God told me when I gave Him a list of reasons as to why I should not write this book), should be obedience - not what others think of you. Aim to please God, live well, and when the critics come out of the wood-work judging you for all the situations that may have gone wrong in your life, remember that God knows the reason behind everything, and because of your love for and commitment to Him, He will cause every single thing you have ever gone through and will ever go through to work together for your good.

TWELVE

NO CONDEMNATION

As followers of Jesus Christ, we cannot be effective in leading the lost to salvation if we are constantly critical of the faults of others. To accomplish the Great Commission, we must bare the spirit of humility, recognizing that we have all fallen short of the glory of God (Rom. 3:23): No man is perfect. If we don’t deal with this issue that poses a huge and lingering threat for the church, many that are lost will not seek salvation and some who have back-slidden will not return to the fold.

That is a scary thought. The Bible declares that God wishes that none would perish, but that all would be saved. (2 Pet. 3:9). How can this happen except the church exemplify meekness and humility? What is prevalent in the body of Christ, however, is the spirit of pride which forms that ever-damaging religious spirit. Religious spirits are legalistic spirits. Mercy, compassion and understanding are absent from them. Instead, condemnation and foolishness abide. This has been an ongoing problem for centuries.

Although Christianity originated from the teachings of our Lord Jesus Christ which include: Love, compassion, empathy and forgiveness, the devil has been successful in deceiving those who have been shown mercy, compassion and love themselves, unto salvation, to turn around and be perpetrators of everything that goes against the gospel of grace. People who are legalistic believe that they are pleasing God with their legalism, but they fail to see that they are doing more harm than good because of the blinders Satan has placed over their eyes. They are actually helping to accomplish Satan’s goal and in that lies a penalty.

If anyone of us (regardless of how anointed we are or believe we are) fails to put on our spiritual armor daily (Eph. 6:11), we will fall prey to the devil. This can be expected just as the sun rises every morning and the moon comes out at night. Many well-meaning people who truly love the Lord have fallen into temptation and God in His infinite mercy is not shocked by this since He knows we are imperfect vessels living in an imperfect world. However, we must guard ourselves, as much as possible, against falling into Satan’s trap and we do this by developing a close relationship with God and daily drawing nearer to Him. When we fall, however, we must simply get back up, brush ourselves off and be vigilant of the deceptive vices of Satan.

Nothing is more important than this as we cannot be good witnesses or even fulfill our life’s purpose if we are lazy concerning the things of God or allow guilt to ride on our backs. Thankfully, there is no condemnation to us believers through the grace and mercy of Christ Jesus. (Rom. 8:1) Scripture states that a just man falls seven times and gets up again (Prov.24:16). So, no matter what you have done or who accuses you, do not allow the spirit of condemnation to enter into your heart. You can rise above your mistakes knowing that by grace, there is no condemnation to you.

Guilt was something that seemed to seek me out. If I made a mistake, I felt guilty regardless of how small that mistake was. I was unaware of it then, but I had become my biggest critic. Then God convinced me that He loved me no less when I messed up and therefore, I should love myself no less. Nowadays, when I err, I simply ask for forgiveness and move on – disallowing the thought of my faults to linger in my mind. Like this, I have learned to be happy and content - resisting guilt - because where there is guilt, there is misery and peace cannot abide there.

I believe that many people know someone that harbors a religious, “phariseeical” spirit - one who is quick to condemn others when they make a mistake or don’t live up to that person’s standards. The way to combat this type of spirit is to refuse to be infected by that individual’s opinion of you - bearing in mind that God does not hold any grudges. Smile and demonstrate God’s joy and peace regardless of people’s criticisms and also forgive them since they are not abiding in the light, but in darkness and unfortunately, some of them don’t even know it. Lastly, pray for them to be delivered from the spirit of legalism.

As I said to the couple in my dream before the onslaught of demonic attack, God will forgive you regardless of what you have done. Simply call on Him and ask for His forgiveness, pick yourself up, brush yourself off, and move on from that mistake. If you harbor guilt for something that you did in the past, I urge you to release that negative, demeaning spirit from your life, and ask God for His peace. He will rescue you from your torment by filling you with His love and forgiveness. The Bible declares that after you repent of your wrongdoings, God remembers your sin no more (1 John 1:9, Isa. 43:25) When Satan reminds you of your past, remind him of his future.

Know Your True Self Worth

I knew this girl we would call Sara that had lost a good paying job when her company downsized. Before that, she had been doing quite well for herself. She was a single mother with one young child and had her own house in a decent part of town. However, after she was laid off, Sara became discouraged and only wanted to find employment that was of a “similar standard” to the one she had before. With her severance package, she had put a good chunk on her mortgage and refusing to even consider anything that she deemed inferior to her previous job, the remainder of the money she had left was quickly diminishing. Soon, all was gone and as the bills were mounting, one by one, her utilities were shut off. Although the story sounds discouraging, there was an upside to it: She had a family that cared and decided to assist her as best they could until she got back up on her feet. Her son went to live with relatives who treated him very well and even paid for his private school tuition, and a couple of her siblings put together every month and paid her house note. All Sara had to do was find work to keep her utilities on, food in her house and gas in her car. That sounded like a super deal to me. Most people would be thrilled if someone cared enough to rescue them like that. However, Sara could not see the upside. She instead, focused on the downside of things. She did not want a low paying job even if it meant she lived in darkness and starved to death.

Somehow the devil convinced her that she had an image to protect, which ironically, she wasn’t even protecting since her utilities had been shut off for months and a neighbor felt the need to go over frequently to give her something to eat. Sara was allowing pride to control her life and to keep her from the things God wanted her to have. One day, some relatives of mine met her at a party; they had not seen her in years. She opened up to them about what she was going through. The following day, I went with them to pay her a visit and when I walked inside of her house, I thought I was stepping into an old, abandoned building, yet the house was fairly new. Sara failed to upkeep it (although that term is an understatement) and I had no idea how she lived there all alone. The place had an air of sadness about it and Sara did not have running water or electricity. She showed us her empty kitchen – there was nothing at all there to eat – just a little water stood in a gallon-sized bottle in her non-functioning refrigerator. It was a sad sight to witness and my heart went out to her.

One day, I felt led by the Holy Spirit to encourage her to see the blessings she had in life. I told her that God had given her a house and that she should at least take care of it regardless of how she felt. I reminded her that many people wished they had their own home and would give anything to have what she had, but God was not pleased that she had not been taking care of it and that she needed to do better. I knew that she had been depressed and some people, when in that state of mind, have no desire or will to upkeep anything because their energy is sapped, but dead creatures and their droppings, among other things, were everywhere, and that house could have only been a playground for demons. That is why it’s so important to not give any room to the spirit of depression through discouragement. Once those entities have settled in, it oftentimes takes tremendous effort to get freed from them.

My relatives and I decided to pool together some funds and go into the power company to see if we could get Sara’s lights turned on. She owed quite a bit of money and we were able to come up with a portion of it. We convinced the person in charge to restore Sara’s electricity once she agreed to pay the remainder of the balance owed in installments. This was done and we were happy that she was no longer living at home in darkness. We also made it a point every week to send her food from our own cupboards to assist her along the way.

After hearing more of Sara’s story (including how she had lost her mind one day and started to walk her neighborhood naked before a neighbor stopped her and made her go back home), one of my relatives encouraged her to take whatever job she could in order to bring money in so that she could have a better life. Sara refused. She absolutely did not want to do it. She had not lost sight of the image she thought she had to protect. Satan had her so blinded that she couldn’t differentiate between fantasy and reality. That spirit of pride had gripped her so intensely and over-powered her.

Sara enjoyed the use of electricity in her house for about two or three months and having failed to live up to her end of the agreement with the power company, they shut off her power a second time. She was back where she started. She had sought out other jobs, but was unsuccessful and never did try anything she thought was below her standards. Several months later, we found out that she had died suddenly. I can only speculate that the pressures of life ultimately played a role in her demise.

Sara’s story is a very disheartening one. It depicts the life of one of God’s children who allowed discouragement, depression and pride to slip right in and control her life. She had so much going for her that was positive and encouraging, but she failed to count her blessings and focused, instead on the things that really didn’t matter. The Bible states that pride goes just before a fall. It is true in Sara’s case and in countless others around the world. If we would realize who we are in Christ Jesus, knowing that what He knows and thinks of us is what ultimately matters, then the spirit of pride cannot step in.

This story is tragic and I know there are many similar stories taking place right now. If you find yourself struggling with pride, I urge you to adopt an attitude of humility and recognize that what you have or what you do for a living does not equal who you are. You are what God says you are. You have seeds of greatness inside of you – whether you wash dishes, mop floors or clean toilets for a living. Do not allow judgmental eyes to control your life. Do what you can as best as you can and God will reward you for it.

Many wealthy people can identify first-hand with living a life of poverty. While seeking a better life, they did what they had to do regardless of what people thought or said about them. God will not exalt a person who exalts himself– instead, he will humble that person. But those who humble themselves, God will eventually exalt. (1 Pet.5:6) The key is patience, humility and persistence knowing that change will come in time. Do not be defeated by leaving an open door for negative influences to enter your life. Keep hope alive and God will elevate you to a level beyond your wildest dreams. He will repay you for your hardships and suffering because of your determination to fight the good fight of faith.

PART 4

LESSONS FROM THE PROFESSOR

For the Lord gives wisdom and from his mouth come knowledge and understanding... then you will understand what is right and just and fair - every good path. For wisdom will enter your heart and knowledge will be pleasant to your soul. Discretion will protect you and understanding will guard you.

- Prov. 2:6, 9-11 (NIV)

THIRTEEN

REAPING WHAT WE SOW

I was working in banking at the time when I saw an advertisement of some underprivileged people living in a far away country, many of whom were stricken with leprosy. A charity based in Canada had been seeking monthly financial support in order to care for these people who were suffering needlessly. Instantly, my heart was touched. I remember even as a child, I never wanted to see anyone in misery or pain. I felt the Lord leading me to contribute forty dollars per month and I quickly obeyed.

I always felt wonderful whenever I sent donations to the charity, knowing that my small gift was making a positive difference in the life of someone I didn’t even know. Believe me, there is no feeling that compares to generosity, particularly when you are not expecting anything in return from the person you have blessed.

Just weeks after I had started contributing to the leprosy foundation, my supervisor at work asked if I wanted to do weekend checks of the bank’s automated banking machine. The person that normally did it would be unavailable for a while and so my boss decided to ask me if I would be interested. It was a very simple task: All I had to do was check once per day on Saturdays and Sundays to see if the machine was still in operation and had not closed. What was so amazing about this was that the remuneration for checking the ABM each week was exactly forty dollars. I had just recently started contributing forty dollars per month to the charitable organization and was soon offered the easiest job of my life - earning an additional one hundred and sixty dollars per month apart from my regular salary. I knew the Lord was demonstrating something very profound to me: He was teaching me that He notices all good deeds and that anytime we make a sacrifice to meet the needs of others, He will reward us. In the end, I had reaped many times over what I had sown into that charity.

My reason for sharing this with you is for you to see how awesome God really is. When you help others, you are not only helping them - you are also helping yourself! Whenever you give, you are not losing anything, but instead, you are gaining. You may not be in dire straits right now and everything may be going well for you and your loved ones, but things never remain the same. We are imperfect people living in an imperfect world: Trouble does come and when it does, we will find ourselves in need of something or the other. The great thing is that when we have planted good seeds all along the way even while the going is good, we store up a harvest for when the going gets rough. We are never abandoned by God. He will always make a way for us even if there seems to be no possible way. Remember my first miracle in Florida?

When you are a giving person, God will move any mountain out of your way. Nothing is too difficult for Him. But if we want to see God’s favor and witness the miraculous in our lives, we must not be self-centered people. God requires us to be givers. You may not have a lot, but you always have something that you can give to help someone else even if that means you deprive yourself to some degree.

When I was growing up, my mother talked about how when she was a child if my grandmother had a candy bar, she would share it among all six children. Whenever I reflected on what she had said, the thought that always came to my mind was that sharing a candy bar among all those kids meant that each of them had to have gotten just a tiny piece. Until one day, it hit me: The lesson their mother was trying to teach them by mere demonstration was how important it is to share no matter how little the thing is. The act of giving defeats the spirit of selfishness.

Some people’s attitude is I can’t afford to give to anyone because I barely have enough for myself. That is the absolute wrong attitude to have. That mind-set would keep you deprived. When we learn to share what little we have with one another - especially when we see a need - we not only position ourselves to receive more than we already have, but we gain a sense of gratification that cannot be compared. Everyone can do something to help someone else. It doesn’t have to always be in the form of money, but we can give our love, our time, our compliments, a smile each day or an encouraging word. Every person on the face of this earth has something good to offer.

We cannot be genuine followers of Jesus if we refuse to walk in His ways and if we do not want to be the least bit inconvenienced. If we are to please God, we must be our brother’s keeper and we must love others as we love ourselves. Love is an action word. Anyone can say that they love another person, but if there is no corresponding action behind that claim, they are not being truthful.

The greatest commandment God gave to us is that we love Him with all of our heart, soul, and mind, and the second is that we love our neighbor as we love ourselves (Matt. 22:34-40). How often do we see this kind of love displayed in our communities? Sure, we go to church and we may encounter fellow worshippers who express that they love us or we may say that to other brothers and sisters, but saying it is one thing; demonstrating it is quite another. How many of us will see the man in the wheelchair and walk right past him although we have something to offer - no matter how small it might be? What about the poor old lady who seems to be abandoned or neglected by her own family? What about the family down the street who is struggling financially and can barely get enough food on the table for the children to eat? What about your own sibling or other relative who you know is struggling every day just to get by, but you turn a blind eye even though you are in a much better position financially than they are? I am by no means encouraging anyone to be an enabler to someone who is not trying to help him or herself; I am encouraging you as a child of God to listen more carefully to the still, small voice of the Holy Spirit instructing you daily as to whom you should bless and in what manner. We are to always walk in the love of God, for God is love. 1 John 3:17 states: If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person? We, as Christians, need to be more passionate about following the leading of the Spirit instead of walking around every day carnal-minded and just focused on ourselves.

Selfishness is Sin

From the time we were toddlers, we automatically knew how to be selfish. This takes no special effort on our part and demands no instruction or specific training. We were all born into this sinful world and the spirit of selfishness may have been the first evil entity we encountered.

Selflessness (a kind, altruistic nature) is the exact opposite of selfishness. Note the word less in there. The definition, simply put, is the state of focusing less on one's self. This, however, in many cases, must be taught and demonstrated, and for many, can be a difficult lesson to learn. For example: Some parents are not actively teaching and/or demonstrating acts of kindness towards others, so their children grow up believing that they are the center of the universe, and subsequently, to a great degree, are unmoved or unaffected by the plight of others. This lack of empathy is what's killing society today. Some children, on the other hand, seem to be naturally kind-hearted, helpful and eager to assist. The spirit of selfishness is the culprit behind many evil and heinous acts.

God is grieved by the lack of brotherly love that exists in our various communities around the world today. There seems to be a few who are going out there in obedience, sacrificially making a positive difference in our societies. Many people from humble backgrounds are elevated in life to a position of affluence and influence, but will not follow the leading and guidance of the Holy Spirit to invest in their own communities for the sake of others who are less fortunate. God never promotes and blesses us so that we can be a reservoir. Quite to the contrary!  Scripture states that God promised to bless Abraham and that he would be a blessing (Gen. 12:2). The same applies to all of us. I believe that when we hoard material things for ourselves and turn a blind eye to the needs of others, God allows circumstances into our lives to eventually take from us the very thing we've been trying so hard to hold on to. If we give whatever we can to make someone else’s life a little easier, we set ourselves up for God to do miracles in our own lives.

Do you think that something incredibly supernatural has to happen in order for it to be a miracle? No! You can be someone else’s miracle. Your kindness can be the tool that is the answer to someone’s prayer.

I once heard of a man and his wife who had fallen on tough times. They were so financially strapped that one day they couldn’t even afford to buy groceries for the house. Then the Lord spoke into the man’s spirit to go into the food-store, shop for the things they needed, and then proceed to the check-out counter as usual. The man didn’t have any money to pay for the items, but he knew that he was being led by God to take this step of faith. I'm sure he must have been thinking how silly he would look and feel if something miraculous did not happen in order for him to take the groceries home.

After he and his wife had placed the groceries into the shopping cart, the man’s wife, apparently out of embarrassment, decided that she would wait outside while her husband went to the check-out counter. A few moments after he got there, a man approached him and said something that he knew was truly heaven-sent. The stranger said that God had told him to go to that counter and pay for this man’s groceries. And that is exactly what happened! That stranger became the other man’s miracle. Thunder did not have to roll and lightning did not have to flash for that husband and wife to receive their blessing.

There is another lesson to be learned from this testimony which is that we must listen carefully to the voice of the Holy Spirit. As Christians, the Holy Spirit lives inside each and every one of us. He speaks to all of us; we just have to incline our spiritual ears to listen. Some of us choose to ignore the voice of the Spirit because we have allowed ourselves to become carnal-minded and self-absorbed. After a while, we can’t seem to hear that still, small voice anymore. That’s why it is so important to make a concerted effort every day to walk in the spirit. This can only be achieved by spending regular time with God.

Spending time in prayer and meditating on God’s Word each morning is our weapon against the devil. As we get our thoughts in line with God’s thoughts and constantly speak His Word over our lives and the lives of our loved ones, we are spiritually aligned with God, and no matter what challenges we face, He controls the outcome. The Bible declares that all things work together for good to those who love the Lord (Rom. 8:28), so when we commit our thoughts to Him bright and early each and every morning, not only are we honoring Him by putting Him first place in our life, but we can be confident that we will hear His voice and He will lead and guide us in every situation we encounter throughout the day.

As we still live in a physical body, we are bound to fall off track from time to time, but we must quickly pick ourselves up and get back in line in order to live a spirit-filled life graced with wondrous blessings. The bottom line is that if we start our day with God, it puts us on the right track and our desire to please Him keeps us there.

Money really doesn't make the world go 'round

Most people believe that if only they had more money and their bills were all paid, they would be happy and life would be just perfect. If that were true, what in the world happened to those mega-rich people who ended their lives by way of suicide because they just could not grasp lasting happiness in spite of all their wealth? Many people are stressed due to financial hardships and it is reported to be the leading cause of divorce in many communities. Financial strains can have a debilitating effect on people to the point where they have no peace and no joy. They live in constant fear and anxiety, and even sometimes resort to crime and degradation in an attempt to make ends meet.

In this world, money is not a luxury, but rather, a necessity. I understand what it feels like when bills are due and there’s not enough cash coming in to keep up with them. It can be very frustrating. In light of this, it is reasonable to think that once all debt is erased or at least all the bills paid up, one can be happy and life can be just awesome. However, the fact is if God is not first place in someone’s life – regardless of how much money they have - that person cannot find true, lasting happiness.

When God matters to us more than life itself, we have limitless benefits: We can pull from our arsenal of faith the encouragement we need to go on if tragedy strikes, when health declines, when a miracle is needed – the things no amount of money in the world can change. That is why when people are blessed financially, but have no real relationship with God, they cannot cope when they are faced with situations and challenges that money cannot solve. It is great to have money and all of our financial needs met, but the most important goal for our lives should be to love God unconditionally, to genuinely love others (and not just give lip service), and to desire God's will for our lives. Once everything is properly aligned, we are bound to live a victorious life.

But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness and all these things will be given to you as well - (Matt 6:33).

Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal, but store up for yourselves treasures in Heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also - (Matt 6:19-21).

God wants us to have money, but He does not want money to have us.

Seed, Time and Harvest

I like to separate the phrase, seed, time and harvest in order to properly demonstrate a very important principle behind those words. This subject is critical in the faith walk of any Christian, yet many people do not realize the power behind the use of this principle.

Have you ever prayed earnestly for something you wanted to see happen in your life and it seemed as if no matter how much you prayed, nothing seemed to be changing? Perhaps you’re in that situation right now. Months, perhaps years have passed and you still have not seen the answer to your prayer and you begin to grow weary. Due to the uneventful passage of time, have you stopped praying, believing, hoping that God will come through for you? I believe we’ve all been there and I dare say that many of us are in the “waiting period” hoping to soon see the manifestation of our answered prayers.

The Bible states in 1 John 5:14: Now this is the confidence that we have in Him, that if we ask anything, according to His will, He hears us. Some theologians, in a round-about way, tend to explain this by changing anything to some things. This passage of scripture is very clear, but before I expound upon it, I have added a few scriptures that reveal more to us about God’s will in the area of our desires:

- If you remain in me, and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you.  – John 15:7

- The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.  - James 5:16 (NLT)

- ... Ask, and ye shall receive that your joy may be full.  - John 16:24

- For the Lord God is a sun and shield: The Lord will give grace and glory: No good thing will He withhold from them that walk uprightly.   - Psa. 84:11

- Therefore I say unto you, what things soever ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them.  - Mark 11:24

- But without faith it is impossible to please Him: for he that cometh to God must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of them that diligently seek Him.  - Heb. 11:6

God is interested in both the needs and desires of His children. You may say... but the Bible states that God will supply all of my needs according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:19). True, but let me remind you of Psalm 37:4 which states that if we delight ourselves in the Lord, He will give us the desires of our hearts. This verse indicates the word desires; the previous scripture states needs. Bottom line: God wants to meet both our needs and desires. I believe that the reason some people never advance to the level God intended for them to reach in life is because they focus on God meeting just their needs, when in fact, God wants to do much more.

I was out in my front yard early one spring morning when the Lord led me over to one of the flowering plants that had grown so beautifully over the past few months. As I stood there looking at it, He began to teach me something that I never even considered before:

"Look at the plant," He started. "After its seed was planted, were you able to see what was happening to that seed in the ground?"

"No", I answered.

Then He went on: "As the days and weeks passed, the ground looked the same - nothing seemed to be happening. However, after some time had passed, suddenly one morning, you saw a stem standing briskly in the ground where you had planted the seed. Then, a little later, as more time passed, you saw the leaves, then flowers."

I immediately understood the lesson: In between the seed and the flowers was…time. God proceeded to explain that this same principle exists in the spiritual realm. When we plant a seed (whether it be in the form of a prayer request, financial gift, etc.) even though we cannot see anything happening in the natural, there is a process taking place that will produce a harvest just like the example of the flowering plant. The problem most people have with this principle is the issue of time. We naturally want things right away and rarely appreciate waiting. However, during the waiting process, we should be watering our seeds by staying in faith and meditating on God’s Word knowing that the seed has to produce a harvest, but only at its assigned time. God knows best and He has His reasons for the length of time designated between the planting of the seed and the harvest (which is the manifested answer to our prayers). If we never had to wait for what we wanted, we would not need faith. Faith is essential for God's favor in our lives and the Bible declares that without it, it is impossible to please Him (Heb. 11:6).

Several years before the Lord taught me that very important lesson about seed, time and harvest, and after our children were born, Ozzie and I finally located a vacant piece of land in a very nice part of town. After praying about it, we paid a deposit on the property and believed that God would help us build our dream home. At that time, money was still limited, so we could not focus on what we had in the natural because it was not enough to pay off the balance which was owed on the property nor was it enough to build a new home. We knew we had to stand in faith, agreeing to focus on the supernatural. There, we saw blessings and a God who is more than enough and more than able to do exceeding, abundantly, above all that we could ever ask, think or imagine. We had been praying for years for our own home and were not about to give up on seeing that dream become a reality.

A couple of weeks after paying the deposit on the vacant land and learning that the title was clear, we decided to make a one thousand dollar contribution to God’s work. That meant we were using the little we had left in order to be obedient to the leading of the Holy Spirit. It was a tremendous sacrifice, but I also learned that obedience is better than sacrifice. Two months later, toward the end of that December, the Lord spoke very clearly into my spirit that great things were going to happen for my family and me in the upcoming year. I told Ozzie what the Lord had said and soon those words proved prophetic. On the fourth day of January in the new year, the one thousand dollar seed we had planted reaped a forty thousand dollar asset. Six months later, the harvest had more than quadrupled! What God did was so amazing that we couldn’t in a million years have dreamed that He would bless us in that way - and His timing was absolutely perfect. Whatever we needed and wanted in that season was given to us and we have been praising God for His wonderful blessings ever since.

Another time in my life, I was praying for something that was really important to me. I told God how I felt about the situation. What I was praying for seemed impossible to achieve in the natural; nevertheless, my desire for it was so strong that I cried out to the Lord asking Him to please make it happen for me. God fulfilled the desire of my heart four months later.

Now, let me clearly illustrate this for you: At the beginning of the four months, I submitted a request to God that was genuine and heart-felt, which could be viewed symbolically as a seed I planted. Over the course of those four months, I watered my seed regularly via prayer and confession, believing in faith that what I asked of God, although it seemed impossible to achieve in the natural, He would give to me. Before I received my harvest, I had a dream in which Jesus appeared at my bedside. He showed me how things would work out in relation to what I had earnestly prayed for, then He said these words, which I have since written on a sheet of paper and stuck onto my dresser mirror: I have done this because of your faith.

Shortly after that dream, God granted my request just the way He showed me it would happen in the dream. By appearing to me Himself, Jesus wanted to emphasize how extremely important faith is to Him. It is true as the Bible declares that without faith, it is impossible to please God and I know without a shadow of a doubt that if I had not exercised my faith, I wouldn’t have seen the miraculous occur; I would not have seen the manifestation of an answered prayer; I would not have reaped my harvest which is my reward. Note the scriptures that I listed earlier in this section.

So remember that when we plant a spiritual seed, we must regularly water it via prayer, faith and confession of God’s word as the process of time passes in order for us to reap a beautiful and certain harvest.

The examples I mentioned here apply to good seeds that were planted. However, the principle of seed, time and harvest applies when we purposefully plant bad seeds as well. The Bible clearly states that we reap what we sow (Gal. 6:7-9): That applies to both good and bad seeds. Every day of our lives, we are planting seeds – whether they are good or bad. Let us strive to plant only good seeds so that we will always reap good harvests – not just for our sakes, but for the sake of our loved ones.

FOURTEEN

BE HAPPY FOR OTHERS

You will never have God’s best - and I mean never - if you do not practice being happy for others. And yes, I said “practice” because if it doesn’t come to you naturally, you need to practice the behavior until it does. Say a friend is getting married and you have been praying for a husband for years, and at age forty, you’re still unwed, lonely, and feeling like you have missed out on such a glorious part of life. Although you want to be happy for your friend, a battle rages inside of you.

The way you overcome the spirit of jealousy is to remember how important it is in God’s eyes for you to be happy for others. You must first start with your mouth (for there is power in the tongue) by saying to yourself, “I am happy for so and so,” and then say it to your friend, “I am so happy for you. Girl, you deserve to be happy!” And as much as it may eat at you even while you’re saying it, know that you are making progress and soon your feelings will catch up with your words. Every time that pessimistic spirit comes at you trying to feed you negative thoughts against your friend, say out loud (if you’re alone) or in your mind if you’re not: I am happy for my friend. She deserves to be happy. And as an added bonus, go volunteer to help her in any way that you can.

Whether you realize it or not, your words are very powerful and they cut through the atmosphere of your life and alter it in the direction you have spoken. Once you practice being happy for others (even though it may seem difficult at first), soon you will find yourself genuinely happy when those around you are blessed. Also, God will begin to bless you above and beyond your wildest dreams and desires – sometimes giving you even better than what others around you had gotten ahead of you.

When my husband and I were praying and trusting God for a house we could call our own, others in our inner circle were already getting theirs. Ozzie and I had even helped my brother and his wife with their first home building project in our hometown while they were residing abroad for a few years. We handled the bulk of the responsibility and we both did it cheerfully and with a good attitude. We treated the project as if it were our own. I recall one time a tile layer we had just hired wasn't doing such a good job laying the tiles he had started and we made him re-do the ones that were not properly placed down. My point is that although it was not our house and we had so desperately wanted our own for years, it did not stop us from treating someone else’s building project as if it were our own. That’s when you can desire something, but at the same time know how to be happy for the person who already has what you want.

I truly don’t believe that God would have blessed us to the extent that He did in time if we were jealous, envious and covetous people. Let me encourage you today to not allow those feelings to ever grab hold of you. They are negative emotions that have their roots in the demonic. If you stay in faith and keep doing good for others regardless of how you feel or what your circumstances happen to be, God will give you above and beyond what you have ever asked for, dreamed or imagined. That will be your reward for all the time you have waited, for all the tears you have cried, for all the trouble you went through. As I mentioned earlier, sometimes He will even give you better than those who were blessed before you.

One day, my father said something to me out of the blue that really stuck in my mind. It was during that same chapter of our lives when Ozzie and I had tried and failed so many times to acquire a piece of vacant land to build our house on. Daddy and I were driving past a relative’s home that was recently constructed and although I didn’t say anything to my father about how frustrating trying and failing in that area had become, he uttered something that I knew was of God. He said, "It’s their time now; your time is coming." He could not have known how powerful those eight words were and how much comfort they gave me from that moment forward. I often say that God gives us what we need when we need it. Throughout the waiting and future disappointments, I kept thinking that my time is coming. Thanks, Daddy, for those powerful words of wisdom.

Whatever you are believing the Lord for, rest assured that if your heart is pure and you try your best to live the life He suffered and died for you to have, your time is coming. You will live to see the manifestation of your dreams.

Contrary to what some may believe, being jealous of someone and being happy for them at the same time is not realistic. You are either happy for them or you are not. A person cannot truly be happy for someone they are jealous of. It does not matter how much they try to convince you or themselves that they are. In order to be happy for someone, jealousy cannot be present. The Bible clearly states that an unjust man is an abomination to the just and he that is upright in the way is an abomination to the wicked (Prov. 29:27). Being happy for others represents godliness or righteousness; being jealous of someone has its roots in wickedness. We must first confront our own demons, get rid of them and then our spirits can be cheerfully motivated when we see someone blessed.

Friendships have been destroyed because one person could not find it in his heart to be happy for his friend. I think that is the true test of friendship – when one is blessed with something the other wishes he had. I have included a few scriptures below on the subject that I believe would be helpful:

-                         Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other (Gal.  5:26).

-                         If you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth. Such "wisdom" does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, of the devil  (James 3:14-15).

-                         For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice (James 3:16).

-                         Therefore, rid yourselves of all malice and all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and slander of every kind (I Peter 2:1).

You have the power to choose your thoughts. Choose to think positively knowing that God expects it of you and the more you choose positive thoughts and vocalize them, your feelings will eventually catch up to them. You will find yourself being genuinely happy for others, but as I stated earlier – it takes practice. Form it into a habit that can only reap wonderful results. You can do it, for the Word says that you can do all things through Jesus Christ who strengthens you (Phillipians 4:13). If you take this advice, God will promote you in life and no good thing will He with-hold from you (Psa. 84:11).

FIFTEEN

YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH

When Lucy first met her husband, John, she was instantly attracted to him. While dating for a few years, Lucy noticed really good qualities in John as well as some unappealing traits that she figured, in time, would go away. She loved him so much that she thought she could never live without him. She was ready to live the fairy-tale life and looked forward to a future filled with love, joy and endless romance.

John loved to watch love stories on television and listen to soft music. Lucy discovered early on that he was quite the poet as well. However, and quite ironically, he had a harshness about him that seemed to always rub her over the wrong way. This trait showed up frequently in the way he expressed himself. Although he was friendly and could be quite funny, his somewhat abrasive demeanor was not the type of thing Lucy was ever exposed to prior to them getting together and she struggled with it constantly. John would say something, and to Lucy, it sounded disrespectful because it wasn’t put mildly. She was immediately offended. Over the years, she felt like John wasn’t respectful enough, not affectionate enough and certainly not attentive enough. She felt that he was overly critical and nothing she said or did was good enough. Lucy started to feel unloved, unappreciated, deceived, and her heart became hard. She stopped caring; didn’t respect him as much anymore, and she certainly stopped trying to please him. Eventually, she began to feel such deep resentment inside for John and many times thought of divorcing him. When the resentment set in, she did not realize that she had opened a door for Satan to enter in and wreak more havoc in her life.

Lucy was certain that John never really loved her, but deceived her for his own selfish purposes. On top of all that, his actions made the devil’s lies even more convincing. After a series of negative events that almost certainly sent the young couple to divorce court, God prompted them to search their own hearts and what Lucy saw in hers grieved her.

God took her back to a time when she was just a child. While growing up, she never thought she was good enough for anyone. No one ever told her that she wasn’t, but she remembered one time her mother compared her to another young girl she didn’t even know. She remarked that Lucy should look more like the other girl. Her mother was referring to the girl’s size which happened to be a little smaller than Lucy’s frame. Instantly, something took root in Lucy’s heart that convinced her that she wasn’t good enough and that she had to be good enough in order to truly measure up to other people’s expectations.

Lucy never felt that she was special in her mother’s eyes and in spite of always wanting to see others comfortable and happy even as a child, she didn’t notice much of a reciprocation coming her way. When the Lord brought this episode to the surface of Lucy’s mind, she wept like a baby, knowing that what happened long ago was the source of her painful emotions and the attachment issues she had toward her husband in earlier years. She had always looked for acceptance from the people she loved and Satan conveniently used her husband’s imperfections to feed her pain. So when she felt like John was criticizing her that negative feeling fed the sense of inadequacy she already had from years earlier and she put up a huge protective wall. Over the years, Lucy really thought John hated her, but as they embarked upon the healing process, he revealed some things that made her finally understand why he always acted the way he did.

John was the product of a fairly large family. His father often criticized him when he was a young child. Whenever he made a simple mistake or didn’t get something quite right in his father’s eyes, he would hear things from him like: “You can’t do anything right!” or “What’s wrong with you?” His father was never affectionate towards any of his children and was both verbally and physically abusive. John had a very hard life and there was no show of affection within the family unit that he recalls. Inside, he thought he would always have to be tough and on the offensive because as a little child, he was negatively overpowered by someone who should have been a consistent source of comfort, love and kindness. The more John opened up about his past, the more Lucy understood why he behaved the way he did and vice-versa. She also felt very sad for the little boy who had a much tougher journey growing up than she did.

John had been shaped by his environment as Lucy was shaped by hers. She had been expecting John to fill a void that only God, her Creator, could fill. She wanted to feel unconditional love and acceptance, and although John truly loved her, he did not know how to “safely” express it and ultimately could have never given Lucy exactly what she needed in order to feel complete. Lucy soon realized that God’s love was what she really craved and yet she had it all along. When she had made John her idol from years earlier, she had put him in the place where God should have been in her heart. God allowed her to endure all that she did in order for her to understand that no person or thing should be loved and cherished more than her Creator.

People are imperfect and will make mistakes and disappoint us from time to time, but God will never fail us. We tread on dangerous ground when we put our parents, our spouses, our children, our money, our dreams – whatever they may be - in front of God. We are supposed to love Him above everything and everyone and when we go against this command, we suffer and fall every time.

After their marriage was almost completely destroyed, John and Lucy both knew that they had to look inside themselves and surrender their issues to God. They realized that they could not change themselves or each other, but only God could. God eventually did amazing things in their hearts. The walls surrounding their hearts were broken down and Lucy learned to love her husband again – yet not in a way that is excessive and unhealthy, but in a way that is balanced and acceptable in the eyes of God.

Lucy no longer struggles with inadequacy and John has also changed for the better. They get along just fine now. Their relationship is much better than it's ever been. Lucy no longer holds John responsible for her happiness; She is happy because she knows that God loves her unconditionally and she appreciates each day He has given her to fulfill her purpose on this earth and to enjoy the journey (3 John 1:2). She is also happy because she now knows without a doubt that she is, in fact, good enough and no one by their words or actions can ever again convince her that she’s not.

You are also good enough and I want you to believe that in spite of how you have been treated in your life or what you have been told. We sometimes put so much value on the opinion of others and don’t realize that it’s God’s opinion of you that really counts. We are imperfect people living in an imperfect world and we must look inside of ourselves before we can ever clearly see without. People have faced incredible challenges in their lives and in their painful condition are expected to be everything we want them to be. People who are deeply hurt oftentimes tend to hurt others whether deliberately or unintentionally, so placing your self-worth upon the opinion or behavior of someone who has his or her own dark issues to deal with is ludicrous and self-defeating! A person who is broken can never make you whole – only God can do that.

PART 5

WHEN THE BATTLE RAGES

Peace I leave with you; My peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.

– John 14:27

SIXTEEN

PEACE AMID THE STORM

It doesn't take a person with special abilities to retreat in fear and worry when the whole world seems to be caving in on them, but it does take a person with staunch determination to stand strong when he has done all he possibly can and nothing seems to be getting any better.

Life is full of ups and downs. The ups are easy, but the downs can feel like deep, dark pits with no end in sight. What do you do when you’ve tried everything you can and nothing seems to work out? What do you do when you feel like you are standing all alone – the people who should be a support system to you are not and just don’t seem to care all that much. What do you do? As a person who experienced all of these emotions and have been in seemingly insurmountable circumstances one after the other, I have just one answer for you: Don’t give up! It doesn’t matter how difficult or emotionally trying your situation is - just don’t give up. I have been in the pit. I have had thoughts that accompany hopelessness and despair. I know what it feels like when a bill needs to be paid and I have no clue where the first penny is coming from. I know what it feels like. But I also know that in each and every circumstance, God came through. He may not have always come when I wanted Him to, but nonetheless, He came and was never late.

Some struggles can cause you to just want to give up on everything; they can make you feel like everyone is better off without you, but I want you to know that these are thoughts from Satan himself. They are not your thoughts: You don’t have to own them. Instead, when they come to you, you tell the devil that he is a liar and Jesus calls him the father of all lies. Do not believe the lies; believe the truth which is: Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers Him out of them all – not some, but all! Take charge of your thoughts - don’t allow your mind to be influenced by the very one that hates you and wants to see you destroyed. As long as there is life, there is hope. Each moment, each hour, each day is bringing you closer to your breakthrough. Just keep the faith, keep a good attitude in spite of your suffering, and don’t give up - no matter how bad things might look.

I have experienced so many storms in my life that after the first major one, I thought I couldn't handle even one more and I actually pleaded with God to not allow any more trials into my life. That was one prayer He did not answer. I learned soon enough that throughout life, there must be trials. Without them, we cannot grow, so by asking God to cause my life to be problem-free was contrary to His word (Psalm 34:19). The first major battle I recall being engaged in went on for six years. It was a court case I had filed against my former employer. It took a lot of prayer and faith for both my husband and me to get through victoriously. There were many ups and downs. One day, things looked hopeful; the other, dismal, but God was there every step of the way.

Nearing the end of the battle, I had already gone through four lawyers – two of which nearly caused my case to be thrown out, yet Ozzie and I remained steadfast in faith. When things looked bleak, we encouraged each other. When things looked good, it seemed like we only had a few minutes to rejoice before they started looking bleak again.

Five days after our son, Christian, was born, we were out in search of a new lawyer after the third one had walked off the case. We proceeded with the fourth, who almost provoked the judge to throw the matter out for good. I remember that day like it was yesterday. Ozzie and I were at my lawyer’s office awaiting her arrival as court was scheduled for that morning. The secretary said that she was on her way, so we waited and waited for what seemed like forever. Ten o’clock was fast approaching; she was still a no-show, so Ozzie and I reluctantly walked across the street to the courthouse hoping that she would meet us there momentarily.

We sat together in the sparsely-filled courtroom and what was so amazing was that I literally sensed the Lord’s presence in the seat directly in front of me. Then I saw a vision of Him sitting there and felt such immense comfort knowing that He cared about us so much that He wanted us to know that He was right there with us. As I reminisce on that day, I can still, years later, see in my mind's eye exactly where He sat.

The judge entered the courtroom at ten o’clock sharp. He was a tall, slim, austere-looking man. He had presided over my case from the beginning as we had previously made a few court appearances in the matter. As the judge took his seat, he called me up front and asked me where my lawyer was. “She’s running a bit late, but will soon be here,” I answered. Well, that just about knocked him off his seat. He was obviously insulted by the fact that my lawyer had the nerve to be late for court!

The judge then did something that I never expected him to do. After five years of my husband and me pressing on to get the case to the point where it finally was, he started assembling his papers and said that he was going to throw the case out. I stood there in disbelief that this is how it will all end – with no justice – just accumulated bills and legal fees I could not pay. Then, I heard in my spirit: Stand still. As the judge assembled his file, I stood quietly – not even attempting to say another word when all of a sudden, he looked at my husband and said: “Mister Taylor, go and get her!” Ozzie sprung up from his seat so fast, relieved that the judge was actually giving us a second chance. As he sprinted toward my lawyer’s office, he met her on the way and urged her to hurry because the judge was about to throw the matter out!

When my lawyer arrived, she immediately faced a tongue-lashing from the judge - so severe that Ozzie and I both felt very embarrassed for her. Thankfully, the case went on and we arrived at the end where we would only have to wait for the judge’s ruling which would come later.

If I went on to tell you the mistakes my attorneys had made and all the craziness that happened, you would not get to the next chapter of this book any time soon. The entire time, Ozzie and I firmly believed that I would emerge victorious. I had gone up against a highly reputable company with far more resources than I had, but I had something that they didn't – God's support. He was on my side. I was assured of that when things were looking good and when they were looking really bad.

A friend of mine became aware from a connection she had in the judicial system of how things were looking in my matter. She called me at home one evening and said that according to her source, things did not look good for me because my attorneys had really messed up my case. I was completely unmoved and simply responded that I would be victorious regardless of how things looked and that she will see. My friend is a good person and did not delight in being the bearer of bad news, but during our years in the “wilderness”, Ozzie and I had learned to focus on the supernatural and not the natural. I kept hearing in my spirit that the natural was just an illusion of what was real in my case.

After speaking with my friend, I walked into the kitchen and a moment later, heard the words: Whose report will you believe? Knowing that it was God who asked the question (Remember: My sheep know My voice – John 10:27), I said to Him that I believed His report and not what I had heard. Later on, I went on to have a dream which revealed the amount of compensation the judge would award me in his judgment order and I saw myself holding the cheque written by my former employer. Up to that point, no exact, overall figure had been calculated in my legal suit as the attorneys had left it (specifically the amount for punitive damages) to the discretion of the judge. I knew the dream served as final confirmation to me that I had won my case, but for me to be able to see the figure that would be awarded was truly astounding.

Several weeks later, my friend learned (before I was officially informed) what the verdict was in the case and she called to share the news with me. The first thing she asked was if I was sitting down. Sensing the nature of her call, I said that I wasn’t, but that she could go ahead and speak. In a tone of utter shock, she exclaimed, “Girl, guess what? You won your case!” In no way surprised, I evenly replied: “I know. I told you I would.” She expressed that she was amazed by the faith I had all throughout the case.

I soon realized that God had not shown Himself strong in my and my family’s life just for our sakes, but as a result of this long, difficult matter, others who never expected me to win my case were able to see God’s glorious power at work. I understand that when God does a wondrous thing in someone’s life, He always has others there to witness His goodness, grace and unfailing mercy.

Six years after the battle began, I received the amount I had seen in my dream - in addition to the accumulated interest. God had kept the interest part a pleasant surprise. He never ceases to amaze me.

I wanted to show you, by my own experience, that you can get through anything victoriously with God on your side. He will do wonders in your life if you would just believe that He would. The Bible states that Jesus did not do many miracles in his own hometown because of the people’s unbelief (Matt. 13:58). Throughout the Scriptures, He emphasized faith. Without it, we cannot please Him. Just because things are difficult right now does not mean that they are permanent. Hardship, sorrows, distress are all subject to change, but you must believe that.

Ozzie and I endured really tough times during the years that court battle raged on and sometimes, I became discouraged. If my husband wasn’t right there to encourage me, I encouraged myself in the Lord (1Sam. 30:6) and I’m sure he (Ozzie) did the same. We knew that somehow God would bring us through it, so giving up was not an option for us.

You might think that what you are going through is knocking you over side-ways, but if you would just give it all to God and follow His leading and direction, (holding steadfast to your faith), He will fight your battles for you. He will give you justice and hope for a better future.

SEVENTEEN

FAITH FOR THE BATTLE

At the end of chapter five, I posed the question: What do you do when you are in a bind and have absolutely no idea what is going on - when there is no vision, no dream, no premonition? As you read this chapter, you will discover the answer to that question.

My father had been a very quiet man for as long as I could remember. Although he kept my siblings and me in line, he was never abusive and did his best, along with my mother, to take care of us.

Daddy barely uttered a word to us about his past, but you just knew that he had experienced a lot of hardships in his life-time and was holding on to some painful memories. I don’t remember him smiling much. He probably saw it back then as a sign of weakness and there was no way he was going to give anyone the impression that he was weak. With that seemingly impenetrable exterior, he did not seem happy at all. Though alive, he was not really living and sometimes, I truly felt sorry for him even as an adult going about my own life. Daddy was a closed shell; walls were up and had been up for decades. Now at sixty-six years old and set in his own ways, any future change for him seemed highly unlikely.

My father was hypertensive for many years and sometimes, he failed to take his medication. In 2006, he started having some chest pains and difficulty breathing. As he was not a fan of the hospital and practically never went for check-ups, he had to have been in a very serious physical state to agree to see a doctor at one of the local clinics. His visit there, however, appeared fruitless as he literally had to sit up night after night since lying down proved unbearable for him. Then one night, I got the call that every child who loves his parent dreads: My father had been rushed to the emergency room of the hospital.

Ozzie and I immediately drove to the hospital where we met other family members waiting there with my mother. Daddy was lying on a gurney looking very frail - unlike the robust man I had known him to be all of my life. In a short space of time, he had dropped a considerable amount of weight which indicated to me that before he had opened up to my mother about how he was truly feeling, he had been suffering quietly.

With a heavy heart, I went over to him and said these words that still ring in my ears today, “Daddy, just as you walked in here, you will walk out.” It was not his physical state that convinced me - as it dictated quite the opposite. It wasn’t hope that convinced me (though hope is vital in any trial); it was the Holy Spirit that gave me those words for my father and attached to those words was my faith.

Ozzie and I accompanied Daddy as he was wheeled upstairs. They connected him to an echocardiogram machine where his heart was displayed on the monitor. We were stunned to see how slow each heart-beat was. Imagine opening your hand and taking ten to twelve seconds just to close it into a fist. That is how slowly his heart seemed to be beating. Ozzie and I were amazed that he was even alive with such a sluggish heart.

Several tests were performed and the doctors discovered that Daddy’s heart, due to years of poorly treated high blood pressure, had enlarged to the size of his chest. His kidneys and liver were also not functioning optimally which presented a solemn diagnosis of heart failure. Needless to say, the news was crushing.

We were told by the chief cardiologist that Daddy would need a heart transplant which happened to be very costly. Furthermore, even if we could afford the cost of the procedure, Daddy would be on a long waiting list. The doctor explained that my father’s heart would never reduce in size and that if he did not have the heart transplant, he would have to rely on various medications to sustain him for the remainder of his life. In other words, his chance of making a full recovery was nil.

The day Daddy was admitted to hospital, a teenage boy connected to a local Christian ministry walked into the emergency room. He noticed my father and went over to him to offer prayer. Remarkably, that young man, who appeared to be around sixteen years of age, led my father in the sinner’s prayer. Daddy gave His life to Jesus on that hospital gurney that day! This was great news and I am still so thankful to God for giving my father yet another chance to surrender his life and will to Christ. What should not have been a surprise after that was that Satan would try his endeavor best - over and repeatedly - to take my father’s life in that hospital. He was on a mission to see that Daddy would never walk out of there. My father was facing the battle of his life and in the natural, it seemed like he was going to lose.

I remember sitting alone in my livingroom that first night, feeling so sorry for Daddy - dreading the thought of him being so close to death. The doctors offered no hope of recovery, but my hope rested in God. With opened drapes, I looked up to Heaven and pleaded with God to give my father more time. I reminded my Heavenly Father that Daddy was only sixty-six years old, and with complete humility, I prayed that He would allow him to live beyond seventy years. I knew right then and there that my prayer had been answered.

Over the course of the next two weeks, Daddy, frail and thin, fought for his life like I had never seen anyone fight before. He almost died on the hospital ward three times! During the last bout, I watched from a distance as doctors tried to hold him down in bed so that they could administer what was medically necessary to treat him. Daddy resisted fiercely only because he was struggling to breathe. One of the doctors, quite burly, struggled along with the rest of them to hold Daddy down, but Daddy’s strength – as opposed to his size – was phenomenal. It was sad, yet amazing to see what was happening. After this particular bout, this same doctor came into the waiting area and told all of us who were gathered there that it was not likely that Daddy would survive. My mother immediately broke down and cried, and we walked with her down the corridor away from my father’s resting area. The news devastated her and she was inconsolable. At that time, my parents had been married for forty-five years and my mother could not imagine life without Daddy. I knew from the moment I heard the doctor’s words that he had conveyed the wrong report, so I told my mother, in no uncertain terms, that God had the last say and that Daddy was going to walk out of there. In the natural, of course, this looked impossible, but I was not looking at the natural.

That night, Daddy pulled through and after two weeks of countless injections, nearly fatal close calls and even shock treatment, Daddy walked right out of that hospital. Yes, I repeat: He walked out of that hospital! But not before seeing a few of the other patients whom we had even become friendly with, die as a result of their illnesses.

God gave my father the will he needed to survive which impressed the doctors that cared for him, as well as the patients that surrounded him. Many of them shared with us how moved they were by Daddy’s strength and determination. His physical frailty made his strength nothing other than supernaturally derived and his presence ultimately left an indelible, faith-building imprint on the hearts of many - especially the doctors that never expected him to live - much less walk out of there.

Daddy left the hospital with a variety of pills that he was instructed to take for the remainder of his life and was even told that the amount of water he could drink on a daily basis was very limited. He was told to return for a check-up each month and this, he did religiously. Approximately eight months later, during one of his regular monthly check-ups, something was strangely different that day. His file could not be located and none of the doctors who had previously treated him was there. Daddy was eventually called in to see the physician on duty.

Unaware of Daddy’s condition and having no file to assist him, the doctor asked him what the nature of his visit was. Daddy told him that his heart was enlarged and offered his story in a nutshell. The doctor decided to connect him to the heart monitor to see for himself since he had no notes to go by. Studying Daddy’s heart on the screen, he eventually said: “Well, Mr. Ferguson, you don’t have an enlarged heart anymore. Your heart is normal.” Daddy was stunned. He couldn’t believe his ears. The news took some time to set in. When he shared the news with me, he was so excited – I had never seen him so happy before. We realized that day that God had not only saved his life, but He had done the naturally impossible – He completely healed my father who now has a perfectly functional heart! We also understood why Daddy’s regular doctor was not on duty that day and why the file could not be located: God had set the whole thing up for Daddy to know that he had been healed!

My father was taken off the many medications he had been taking and since then, has lived life anew. He walks the park like a man decades younger and my children (ages nine and ten at the time) had trouble keeping up with him even while running! He has put on the new man according to Ephesians 4:23-24 and now smiles a lot, talks a lot more and is obviously happy and contented – even all these years later. Daddy is living proof of God’s infinite mercy and grace, and that God can indeed change anyone. I can truly say that I have never witnessed such a dramatic transformation as I have seen in Daddy from the day he got saved in that hospital. The change in his character preceded the miraculous physical healing, thus, making his testimony even more profound. God did above and beyond what we had prayed for and I am happy to say that Daddy has lived years beyond his seventieth birthday and he is still going strong today in every sense of the word. To God be the glory!

Years after first being diagnosed with a 40% reduction of airway flow to my lungs along with other conditions, God did an amazing thing in my life as well. I can now do many more things than I was able to after the accident – even brisk walking! I am happy, wholesome and healthy. However, sometimes God allows certain things to linger as a reminder of where He brought us from. I still have some sensitivity to scents, but it’s not to the extent where it interrupts or puts a damper on my daily life. God has brought me a very long way and again, to Him be all the glory! Great things He has done.

A Little Nugget to Bite

I once heard someone say, “If you are going to pray, don’t worry; but if you are going to worry, don’t pray.” This makes perfect sense and I have never forgotten it. I learned that God is not moved by our worrying; God is moved by our faith. When we are faced with difficult circumstances, worry will come, but we must reject it – just like we do discouragement. These are negative emotions brought on to tear us down - not build us up. Has worrying ever solved even one of your problems? This is what you must ask yourself when difficulty presents itself. Life is too tough for us to make it on our own. Instead, we ought to give all of our concerns to God. 1 Peter 5:7 instructs us to cast all our cares upon Jesus for He cares for us. God knows we were never created to single-handedly deal with the issues of life. In fact, Scripture states that without God, we can do nothing (John 15:5).

Let Patience Have Her Perfect Work

If you don’t know by now that you cannot rush God, please save yourself a whole lot of heartache and stress by noting carefully: God cannot be rushed! He may not move when we want Him to because He knows all things and has a set timing on everything, but He is never, ever late. This also takes faith to believe. When you pray according to God’s will, don’t just expect to get what you have asked for, but expect to receive it at the right time.

One of the main reasons I believe we have to wait on God’s timing is so that patience can be developed and properly maintained within us. Patience builds character and God is very much interested in our character. The Bible declares that the trying of our faith works patience and to let patience have her perfect work (James 1:4). There is a reason why this process is important to our Creator. Furthermore, Scripture tells us that love is patient (1Cor. 13:4). If we are not patient, we are not abiding in love. If we only love God when He gives us what we want when we want it, then the love we profess is not real. Take for example: If you encourage your child to learn an equation and he is not getting the gist of it fast enough for you, if you give up trying with him, and instead, call him derogatory names, is that loving behavior? Absolutely not! Without patience, we cannot truly love and God wants our love to be pure and unconditional – not only toward others, but toward Him as well.

People tend to give ultimatums, and ultimatums, at times, are good and absolutely necessary, but sometimes, we offer them too quickly. However, God doesn’t fit anywhere in the equation of ultimatums. If you were to say: Father God, I want you to make a way for me to get five hundred dollars by Friday and if you don’t, I will never serve you again. How do you honestly think that will turn out? Wouldn’t you be putting God on a time-clock as if the relationship between you and Him is one way - for your benefit only? Should we be so demanding in our relationships even with each other? We will live a life filled with regrets if we are impatient. Impatient people are not just unhappy people, but they give up too quickly and rob themselves out of many blessings that could have been a part of their future. On the other hand, when we develop patience, nothing is impossible for us to achieve.

When Daddy had such close calls with death, I shudder to think of how it would have all turned out if we had stopped praying, stopped believing and stopped hoping. By being relentless in prayer and faith (regardless of how bad the picture looked in the natural), we not only got to see Daddy walk out of that hospital, but later on, we got to see another great miracle of healing take place in his life that has positively impacted the lives of so many people. Giving up was not an option.

Ozzie and I had been praying and believing God for our own house for many years. After sixteen years of marriage and many struggles, God finally gave us our own home. In fact, He gave us better than we had asked for - double for our trouble! I don't know where we would be if we decided God was taking too long and instead, gave up praying, hoping and believing that He had heard and answered our prayers. I truly believe our children would not have a place to call their own right now and we definitely would not have this testimony. I can think of many instances in my life where I prayed and believed for things and had no idea when I would see them manifested. Yet, I kept on praying; I kept on believing; I kept hope alive. Many times, I wanted to give up, but I kept pressing ahead even through the pain - knowing that God loves me and He would not withhold any good thing from me. If I had not truly believed this, I would have most certainly given up. The Psalmist said: I would have fainted unless I believed to see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait on the Lord, be of good courage and He will strengthen your heart. Wait, I say, on the Lord. (Psa. 27:13-14).

There is blessing in delay. Waiting does not feel good, but you must make up your mind that it is good. Just like trials do not feel good, they ultimately, are good for they build and shape our character. For those of us who love God, there is consolation in knowing that after the trial, after the fight, after the hurt, after the betrayal, after the pain – there is reward. It was not all for nought. All things work together for the good of those that love the Lord... (Rom. 8:28). We need trials for the faith and faith for the patience and then we get the breakthroughs and witness the miraculous.

EIGHTEEN

PEACE THAT PASSES ALL UNDERSTANDING

There may have been times when you prayed, trusted and hoped in God for a better life, but the more you prayed, it seemed like “life” was coming at you full force from all different angles. The paycheck already wasn’t enough, but the car broke down. The child got sick. The electricity got turned off for non–payment because you had to purchase propane for the cooking tank. The credit card payment is due and creditors are calling. Your sister whom you’re supposed to be close with is "acting up" and wouldn’t tell you why. And on top of everything else, the refrigerator suddenly stopped cooling and now the meat and dairy is spoiling because you don’t have the money to get the thing repaired.

I think that all, if not most of us can relate to trouble that seems never-ending. Sometimes we can’t do anything to prevent the apparent onslaught, but fortunately, we can control our reaction toward it. Stress is the number one killer of human beings around the globe. It is manifested in various diseases that people regularly take medication to “control”. However, for the most part, medicine seems to only relieve the symptoms to some degree, but never really touch the root of the problem. Cancer is a major killer and a demonic spirit that enters in or attaches itself to an individual when a door has been legally opened – whether it be by stress, bitterness, anger, unforgiveness, drug abuse, smoking, poor food choices, and a myriad of other avenues. Let’s take a look at stress for a few moments.

God never allowed trials upon His children to result in stress and then disease and ultimately death. Trials are allowed by God to build patience, faith and shape our character. Our ignorance or refusal to respond to challenges appropriately is what opens the door to stress. I personally am no stranger to it. It used to be a normal part of my existence for a very long time. I discovered later that it only overwhelmed me when I held onto it and refused to let it go. I had cradled it, pampered it and nourished it by giving it my full attention to the point that I could barely notice anything else going on around me. When I felt that something wasn’t within my control, I worried about it constantly in many instances even after I had already prayed about it.

When I finally surrendered everything to God and stopped holding on to stress, it was a massive relief for me. Through the Holy Spirit and His Word, God convinced me that I did not have to carry the load. Read Matt. 6:34, Matt. 11:29-30 and Psa. 55:22.  When I got this revelation, I actually became good at casting my cares, but this only happened when I stopped relying on myself and instead, totally relied on and trusted God. When things happened that would have literally devastated me before, I was, instead, filled with such peace. Sometimes, I felt so strange because I wasn’t worried or ruffled that I started inwardly questioning myself: Shouldn’t I be worrying about this? Why am I so at peace? Even if I questioned myself enough that I felt myself leaning in the direction of worry, I quickly caught myself by saying: God has me in the center of His hand. He is taking care of this problem. This too shall pass. He said that He will never leave me nor forsake me. No weapon formed against me will prosper. God has everything worked out for my good. I trust and rely on God and He will not let me down. I use different lines at different times, but I could not use them if I did not know God, His Word or believed that He loved and cared for me.

God is concerned about what concerns you. He gives you what you need when you need it. If you trust Him, He will move any mountain out of your way to rescue you. As a Christian, you have these privileges. With this in mind, your troubles and trials should only be catalysts to give the devil a black eye by showing him that whenever he turns up the heat on you, it just causes your love for God to increase. There is power in love - which brings me to my next point.

Perfect Love Casts Out All Fears

My husband and I were going through yet another challenging time in our lives and we saturated ourselves with prayer. Day and night, we stood in agreement, believing and expecting a positive change to come. As we put on the armor of God daily and tried our best to stay in obedience to God’s will, the trials continued. In fact, we did not know that more were quickly heading our way and we needed to be prepared.

As God’s children, He wants us to always be vigilant - to not put our guards down when it comes to our enemy (Satan). However, we are not to focus on him either, but rather focus on God and His Word, and align ourselves and our will with our Creator. Once we do that, we are being vigilant. When we love God unconditionally as He loves us unconditionally, He will prepare us for whatever is to come.

One night, while fast asleep, I was awakened by a loud, audible voice in my ear that simply said: “1st John 4 and 18”. Initially, I was startled, but I knew what I had heard spoken to me was an actual Bible reference. I got up and not wanting to wake my husband, grabbed the Bible from my nightstand and went into the bathroom. I sat down and turned to the scripture uttered to me. It read: There is no fear in love; perfect love casts out all fear. I was flabbergasted; I had no idea what it meant and why the Lord would wake me up in the middle of the night to give me a scripture I did not understand. I read it a couple more times, but still wasn’t sure of its meaning or the point God was trying to make. I wrote down the scripture for reference later, then eventually went back to sleep.

The next morning, I told Ozzie what had happened and also that I had no idea what God was trying to tell me. He told me what I already knew in my heart that I had to do which was to ask God to make the message clear. Later in prayer, I did that and I suddenly understood the message.

God explained to me that the perfect love referred to in 1John 4:18 is the unconditional love that exists between us. His love is perfect and when we love Him in return unconditionally, our love is then made perfect. He went on to explain that because of the sincerity and power of that love, there is nothing that He would not do to help me out of or through any situation that I would ever face in life. I was told to fear nothing that was to come because He has my family and me completely covered. Therefore, no person, thing or situation could stand against us.

I want you to know that if you get to the place where you will love God - no matter what - you can stand on that same scripture with great confidence. I realized why God had conveyed that message to me particularly at the time He did. Many uncomfortable and unexpected things happened after that and if Ozzie and I had not held onto God, we could not have withstood the storm. One situation was so terribly difficult that the Lord caused me to experience the supernatural in a way I had never encountered it before.

One Saturday morning as Ozzie and I were in prayer, I felt the presence of the Lord come upon me so intensely that my right hand began to shake uncontrollably. As Ozzie led the prayer with his head bowed and eyes closed, I didn’t think he had an inkling of what was going on with me as I was quietly being overwhelmed by the power of the Holy Spirit and trying my best not to explode. I soon prayed, completely under the control of God’s Presence, so much so that when I was finished, my husband got up and said that He will give me some time to myself. As he was leaving the room, He locked the door from the inside so that the kids would not disturb me. He later told me that after the prayer, he felt that I needed to be alone with the Lord. He was so right.

I immediately lay prostrate before the Lord, still trembling and feeling His power even stronger now. Then, as if watching a movie, I saw scenes of my future – what He was leading me to do and where I would go. I felt such immense power flow through my fingers that I knew whatever I touched right then God’s anointing would be upon it. Ozzie had a bad case of sinus that same day. Later on, after prayer, I placed my fingers on his head and he instantly felt his head clear up. Before I ever left the bedroom that morning, I must have been in prayer for almost an hour, then I felt extremely light in spirit – as if I were merely floating. An unusual peace overwhelmed me and I believe I was literally having an out of body experience.

When I left the bedroom, I was very light even with each step. I felt God's presence all over me as I walked to the front screen door and looked outside at the blue sky and the trees. As I stood there, I saw my arms rising, but I was not lifting them in my own strength; I wasn’t even attempting to lift them. Then slowly down they went... and up again. I was marveled. I remained under the power of God’s Presence for the entire day straight into the next morning. I experienced the fullness of God’s peace that truly surpasses understanding. Ozzie and I had a serious issue to face the next day, but we faced it with complete confidence in God and the problem was resolved within hours. Although the storm was not over as there were other things going on simultaneously, God’s awesome peace (which also fell upon my husband) gave us the comfort and strength we needed to not just withstand the trials, but to rest through them.

After that amazing experience, I realized that it was just another way that God chose to demonstrate His love for me. He did not have to do that in order for me to trust Him: He did it because I trusted Him. The message in that for you is that our Heavenly Father will do the unthinkable and unimaginable for the person that loves Him so completely. What happened to me can happen to any one of God’s children. How much of His power you will see manifested in your own life largely depends upon how close to Him you desire to become, how much time you spend seeking His wisdom, if He is first place in your life above everyone and everything else (and I did say Him and not religion) and ultimately if your love for Him is unconditional as is His love towards each of us. I am no special case. God loves all of us immensely and we can all experience the supernatural in whichever ways He chooses.

Remember that God is bigger than all of your problems. He saw them way before you did and He has the solution for each and every one of them. If you believe this and lead a life of prayer and faith, you can have peace amidst the storm. When I was battling a seemingly insurmountable problem years before this wonderful experience happened to me, I was sitting on my couch one morning pondering my dark plight and pleaded with the Lord to take it from me. As clear as day, I heard Him say, “I won’t take it from you, but I’ll take you through it”. And He truly did. I made it safely on the other side. Friends, perfect love ensures the victory.

I declare right now in the mighty name of Jesus Christ that when you pass through difficult waters, they will never overflow you and when you walk through the fire, you will not be burned – neither will the flame kindle upon you (Isa. 43:2).

NINETEEN

SPEAK TO YOUR CIRCUMSTANCES

God taught me a very important lesson in a rather unconventional way. There had been a power outage in my neighborhood one evening which really was a bummer for my family and me since all that day had been quite humid.

Ozzie and the kids decided to head out into the livingroom where it was cooler. They took with them a mattress to lie on until the electricity was restored. I was in bed resting when the lights went out and decided to remain there instead. The house was so quiet and still that I utilized that time to fellowship with the Lord.

After about an hour had passed and night began to fall, I asked the Lord to please cause the power to be restored soon as it was still very hot and I was becoming quite agitated. A half-hour to forty-five minutes later, the power was still out and again, I asked the Lord to please restore the electricity. It was then that I heard Him say: “You have already prayed about it, now speak to it.” I was stunned by what I had heard, yet knew that I must be obedient. I then leaned up a little on my side and said these words: “Electricity, I command you to be restored right now in Jesus’ name.” And in an instant, the power clicked back on. I sprung up in bed in total shock. I never expected that to happen. In fact, I did not know what to expect when the Lord instructed me to speak to the electricity. I ran out into the living room and told my family what had happened.

The Lord allowed me to have such an experience not because he was telling me that I could cause the power to immediately be restored if it went out again just by commanding it to; His lesson went far beyond the power supply. He was teaching me that after I pray about something, to speak directly to the circumstance, give it specific commands and declare it all done in Jesus’ name. I am not responsible for the timing God has assigned to every answered prayer; I am responsible, however, for using my mouth to change the atmosphere of my life and that applies to everything and anything that concerns me.

I am reminded in Genesis 1:1-3 that In the beginning God created the Heavens and the earth. Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters. And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light. God saw that the light was good, and He separated the light from the darkness. God called the light ‘day’ and the darkness he called ‘night’. And there was evening, and there was morning - the first day.

Here, we see that God spoke His intent into existence. He has given us that same authority. We, His children, were created in His image and likeness and He has done this for a reason: He desired that we possess His traits and being made in His image and likeness goes far beyond physical appearance. He gave us dominion over the earth and everything in it (Gen. 1:28). He shows us throughout Scripture that He has given us authority to affect our own lives. We, by the words of our mouths, can change the quality of our existence.

After you ask the Lord to do something, in an act of faith, declare that it will happen. Death and life are in the power of the tongue and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof (Prov. 18:21). God views the confession of your mouth as an act of faith, so whatever you declare – be it good or bad – is what will find its way to you. People don't seem to realize how powerful their words really are. That night, God was demonstrating for me in a most powerful way that we can use our words to affect our life.

You have the power to speak life into any and every situation you will ever face. Even in the worst of times, you can speak life and expect something good to come out of it. You can reap wondrous miracles and testimonies if you make speaking into the atmosphere of your life a constant practice.

It was one Saturday morning in August. Our son, Christian, was up early, had showered and dressed for a few anticipated basketball games on the park with his sister and dad. They had made it a weekend routine for years and the excitement was ever-present each Saturday morning - oftentimes from the day before. On the previous Saturday, they were unable to go to the park due to inclement weather, but this Saturday morning started out quite bright. Then as I sat in bed looking out the window, I noticed that gray clouds had formed over our area and it eventually started to rain. Not wanting my children to be disappointed for yet another weekend, the moment the rain started to fall, I began to pray. I said something to the effect of, “Lord, I thank you for holding this rain so that my children can go out to the park this morning,” when suddenly, the rain that had been pouring for only around thirty seconds, abruptly stopped. As I was still sitting in bed looking out the window, I had to get up and go closer to the glass to see if what I thought had just happened, actually happened. It was true. There was not even a single spry after I thanked God for stopping the rain. I was blown away. The gray clouds suddenly disappeared and the sun was out piping hot. I had never seen anything like it before. I knew it was God’s way of demonstrating His love for us, yet again, and showing me that He is truly concerned about what concerns us. The rain was another tool He used to teach me the power of words and expectancy, and how speaking to our circumstances actually changes them.

Our eleven-year-old daughter, Mercedes, and I had just left home less than five minutes earlier to pick up her brother from school. She had been off that day due to a sprained ankle that had gotten remarkably better by afternoon. As we were driving, she suddenly came down with a spell of the hiccups and said she needed some water. I intended to purchase some at a hot dog cart a few blocks away. Then something inside of me propelled me to speak directly to my daughter’s hiccups (as weird as this sounds). I obeyed the voice in my spirit and commanded the hiccups to cease immediately in the name of Jesus. We did not hear another hiccup after that. I waited with a knowing that it would not start again, and it didn’t. For a few seconds, there was silence in the car, then my daughter said, with a somewhat confused expression on her face, “Those hiccups stopped really quick.”

You might say this stuff sounds really "coo-coo" and strange, but God proved to us that He can display His power even in things that we otherwise pay little attention to. His aim is not only to guide us, protect us, care for us, and nurture us… but also to make us aware of the awesome power that He has placed within every one of us. Our earthly existence is supposed to be a learning experience in preparation for our eternal future. We were not placed here on earth to simply "live it up", but rather to operate in God’s anointing each and every day. That is a great and special responsibility that God truly wants all of His children to grasp. He set the example for us to follow even before the beginning of time as we know it.

Unfortunately, many Christians leave this earth after living lives of mediocrity and utter hopelessness. They never lived life as over-comers, never soared, and never saw their greatest dreams become reality. Friends, this was never God's intention.

From this moment on, please do not underestimate the power of your tongue. If you are a parent, your children are relying on you to do all you can to provide for them a good future. Not only are you responsible for raising them and taking care of their many needs along the way, but you have a God-given duty to speak blessings over their life and future. You have the power to do that and you must believe you do. I guarantee that if you practice speaking positive things to your children and over their life, their existence will conform to what you have said. God welcomes prayer and indeed prayer is the stepping stone to blessings and deliverance, but He knows the added power of confession and does not want us to be lazy about it. God wants us to be proactive using the authority He has given us from the very beginning to fulfill the purposes for which He has sent us here.

So often, we are laid back and rely on God to do everything for us. With this type of mentality, our lives are destined to be unfulfilled. God cannot be used as He cannot be manipulated. He expects us to do our part and He will take care of the rest. His word, for example, says that if a person is unwilling to work, he should not eat (2 Thes.3:8-10). Obviously, God has no regard for laziness. If He gave us absolutely no responsibilities and instead, did everything for us, He would be spoiling us rotten. Look at the parent who gives her child everything he or she wants – the child does not learn to appreciate any of it. That same child eventually thinks that he is entitled to everything; he cannot accept no for an answer, and ultimately becomes self-conceited and filled with pride. In short, the parent has created a narcissistic monster! God knows the damaging effects of laziness. He will not spoil His children.

Speak what you want into existence. If you and your family are struggling, declare that you all are blessed and highly favored and that your Father which is in Heaven will supply all of your needs according to His riches in glory. Go a step further and say that He will withhold no good thing from you. If you are sick, command that sickness to leave and declare that you are healed in Jesus’ name. If your child is rebelling or getting into trouble, ask God to bring him to his senses and then declare each day that your child is taught of the Lord, great is his peace, and that God will turn his life around. If you feel inadequate or a sense of hopelessness, command Satan’s lying lips to be silenced and declare that you are valuable, successful, worthy, and will do all that you were created to do. If you are in debt, pray and believe that one day you will be debt-free. If there is something you can do or some change you can make to help alleviate your debt, God will put it in your heart. And daily declare that you are debt-free in Jesus’ name and keep declaring it until you see it happen. Remember, you are not responsible for God’s timing concerning the things you have prayed and believed Him for, but you hold the responsibility to speak what you desire according to God’s will into existence. No matter how long it takes – whether it takes weeks, months or years, keep the faith and keep speaking to your circumstance. Many people have missed out on God’s greatest blessings because they got discouraged or lazy and simply gave up. Don’t let this be you.

If Ozzie and I gave up on praying to become home-owners after the first year, I know my family and I would not have been heirs of such a great blessing today. We call our house "God’s house" because it is a miracle that it is standing here today and that we can call it ours. We prayed and confessed for years, then sixteen years later – we’re here. Sixteen years might be a long time for us, but it really is not that long in God’s eyes. In the course of waiting, He had things to show us, lessons to teach us, faith to build within us - above many things. We had sixteen years of powerful experiences - many of which we have shared with our children and, God willing, they can one day share with theirs. It is a testimony of God’s goodness, His power, His grace and mercy towards us when few people stood by us during our most difficult times. Had I not experienced the wilderness, had I not been tested, had I not confessed daily, I would not have written this book and indeed would not be here today.

Several years ago, the Lord led me to pen a special confession that my husband and I were to say daily. It turned out to be approximately five minutes long and filled with powerful excerpts from throughout His Word. I typed out the entire confession on my computer and saved it in a Word file, then printed a copy for both myself and my husband. We had been saying the confession daily for about two years, when all of a sudden, we got lazy and slackened off. At this time, we were still praying and believing God for our own house, we had two children in diapers and money was tight. It might have been a couple of weeks since we last said the confession when an interesting thing occurred. I switched on my computer and what popped up a few seconds later, blew my mind: It was my typed confession. I did not go into the Word program to retrieve it and I was the only person in the room at the time. I had not opened that file in many months since my husband and I had our own printed copies, and even had the entire confession memorized by then. I was the only one that used the computer at that time as my husband was not very interested in it back then. I was completely shocked that I had just switched on my computer and then moments later, was looking at a document that I never opened. I called my husband into the room and showed him what was on the screen and explained that I had not retrieved it. We both knew what it meant. God was telling us that we needed to continue saying our daily confession and to not get lazy and quit. Needless to say, we quickly got back on track with it and eventually, we got our house and many other things we had prayed for and declared in our daily confession.

Still to this day, years later, we say our daily confession as well as speak directly to our circumstances. There are other things that I have prayed for and declared for years, and I am not about to give up. I have seen how faith-filled prayer and confession has impacted my and my family's life and I know the power that rests within the words we speak.

The confession of your mouth is particularly important when you are facing really challenging situations, but also when you're not. What you say causes the atmosphere in your life to change. Even when a problem seems insurmountable, you should muster up the energy and will-power you need to speak positive words into that negative situation. In some way, it has to change. It cannot remain the same if you consistently attack it with your confession or declaration. If believers would just grab hold of this teaching, every one that implements it will see profound results in his or her life.

If you are too lazy to pray on a regular basis, you will be too lazy to regularly confess what you should in order to see any real changes take place in your life. So if you fit into that category, you need to wake up. Get fired up and committed to God, and determine within yourself that you will fulfill your purpose on this earth. If not, you will miss out on so many wonderful things God has in store for you. As His children, if we ask anything of Him with a pure heart and right motives - according to His will - He will give it to us. Faith is essential in order to move the mountain that stands in our way, and once we have asked in faith, with thanksgiving (which is where we employ our sense of gratitude), then we are to exercise our faith with confession. After we have planted the seed of prayer, we must water it with confession or declaration so that it will produce the harvest.

Faith without works is dead (James 2:26). When we ask God for something, shouldn’t we then do something that demonstrates our faith? He wants us to confess that what we have asked Him for, we will receive. Take charge of your life as the Lord has authorized you to do. Passivity is fruitless, but consistent activity is fruitful. Get pro-active and cause the devil and his demons who negatively affect your circumstances to cringe in fear. You don’t need to be afraid of them; they ought to be afraid of you! I implore you to use the power God has given you and speak to your circumstances so that your life will be fulfilling and your joy will be full.

TWENTY

GRAB HOLD OF THE BLESSING

There are some circumstances in life that command a “take the bull by the horn” sort of approach in order to break down giant obstacles and barriers of delay. The discipline of fasting doesn’t appear to be something that is regularly taught in Christian churches these days, yet it is one of the most life-altering, powerful practices that a believer can undertake.

As a regular faster, I can tell you that even after the very first time doing it, my life has never been the same and over the years of integrating it into my lifestyle, I have grown so much closer to God. In a fasted state, our physical, as well as spiritual senses are heightened and I truly believe from my own experiences that we draw closer to God than by prayer alone. A bond is created between us and our Creator that surpasses anything the human mind can ever fathom. When we sacrifice physical comfort and gratification for a degree of fleshly discomfort - desiring more to be within God’s holy Presence - we learn to rely on God and trust in Him to an extent we never thought possible. We realize how true it is that without Him, we can do nothing – that we are fully and utterly dependent upon His grace. Therefore, our faith increases, our love for God grows, and our life is remarkably altered.

Fasting reaps wonderful results – both physically and spiritually. Not only are our bodies affected, but our minds as well, and our spirits draw closer to God. From a physical standpoint, there exists hundreds, perhaps thousands of testimonies of how various diseases and addictions were healed and eradicated as a result of fasting. Many of these persons were monitored by medical professionals who believe and would swear by the healing power of fasting. From a spiritual viewpoint, I can guarantee that many persons out there in the world who are making a profound impact upon the lives of others in their communities and/or have dedicated their own lives to the preaching of the gospel of Jesus Christ fast regularly. Why? Because they know the power of it.

Fasting breaks the chains that Satan has placed upon the lives of people - financial chains, emotional chains, mental chains – any and all types of bondage that negatively affects the quality of a person’s life. Read Isaiah 58:1-11 to learn more about what the Bible refers to as the acceptable fast. It pretty much sums up the whole idea of fasting. Also, some very informative books have been written on the subject such as one by Gordon Lindsay, entitled: Prayer & Fasting, The Master Key to the Impossible.

I believe that with such a practice, each individual should be led by the Holy Spirit regarding how and when to fast. There are different types of fasts and what might be appropriate for one person, may not be so for another. Let’s take a look at some of them:

The Total Fast: Usually this type of fast requires going without food, but not without water. However to some, it is going without both. I do not recommend going without water for any extended period of time. Water is a vital necessity and I, personally, always include water in my fasts.

The Partial Fast: This entails going without certain types of food, but allowing others. For example: The Daniel Fast.

The Juice Fast: The body is nourished with fruit and/or vegetable juices and water.

Fasting from Material Things & Other Pleasures: To some, this is not considered a true fast, but my belief is that anything you sacrifice for a time for the purpose of drawing closer to God is accepted and rewarded by Him.

Regardless of what type of fast you embark upon, if you are seeking spiritual blessings, a closer, more intimate relationship with God or for bondages in your life to be broken, fasting must be accompanied by prayer. Fasting and prayer must go hand-in-hand for one to achieve the desired effect. Demonstrating dominion over the flesh, but leaving God out of the equation won’t really do you much good. Humbling yourself before your Creator and spending much time in His Presence is what you should aim for – believing that He will strengthen you along the way and reveal to you things never before realized or anticipated.

Perhaps you have been praying and believing God for something and the answer to your prayer seems so distant. Have you ever considered that you must now grab hold of your blessing? This is where the concept of fasting comes in – but only as you are directed by the Holy Spirit.

Grabbing hold of your blessing forcefully affects the atmosphere and events surrounding your circumstance.

God has great things in store for all His children. Before we ever prayed, God knew what we would pray for. Before we had the problem, He already had the solution. Before someone spoke the curse, God already had the blessing lined up. All we need to do is to reach up and grab hold of it. Other than prayer alone, sometimes we need an additional tool in our “arsenal” to grab hold of the promise and answer to our prayers.

In Daniel 10 beginning in verses 2 through 6, it states: At that time, I, Daniel mourned for three weeks. I ate no choice food; no meat or wine touched my lips; and I used no lotions at all until the three weeks were over. On the twenty-fourth day of the first month as I was standing on the bank of the great river, the Tigris, I looked up and there before me was a man dressed in linen with a belt of the finest gold around his waist. His body was like chrysolite, his face like lightning, his eyes like flaming torches, his arms and legs like the gleam of burnished bronze. Then further down in verses 12-14: Then he continued, Do not be afraid, Daniel. Since the first day that you set your mind to gain understanding and to humble yourself before your God, your words were heard, and I have come in response to them. But the prince of the Persian Kingdom resisted me twenty-one days. Then Michael, one of the chief princes came to help me because I was detained there with the king of Persia. Now I have come to explain to you what will happen to your people in the future, for the vision concerns a time yet to come.”

In the first few verses, the man Daniel described dressed in linen was an angel sent to deliver the answer to Daniel’s prayer: The answer for which he had been fasting. Note that God answered Daniel’s prayer from the first day he humbled himself and sought Him, and the angel was sent in response to his prayer. Along the way, the angel was detained by the prince of Persia which is believed to be a strong demonic force and the archangel Michael came and assisted the angel who was sent with the answer to Daniel’s prayer. The bottom line as clearly laid out here is that a spiritual battle rages – good versus evil - and most of the time, we don’t even realize it. Satan has his demons standing guard to try and prevent or at least delay God’s people from seeing the promises manifested in their lives. Ephesians 6:12 (NKJV) states: For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. What did Daniel do to get God’s attention? He did not just pray, but he fasted and prayed. He gave up something for a certain period of time. Sometimes, this is what we need to do in order to break down the barriers, roadblocks and clear out the hindrances that are keeping us from living our dreams and seeing our prayers answered. Daniel fasted for twenty-one days and the angel showed up with the answer.

Jesus’ disciples had once tried to cast out an evil spirit from a boy, but were unable to. When they asked Jesus about their inability to do so, He said to them that “This kind can come forth by nothing, but by prayer and fasting” (Mark 9:29 KJV). We face different circumstances in our lives – some more challenging than others. Oftentimes, the more challenging ones have to do with strong demonic activity that can only be overcome by fasting and prayer. What it took to solve your last ten problems might not be quite enough to solve the one you are facing now. It may take a bit more spiritual authority that comes with fasting in order to bring deliverance. As I’ve stated before, you must be willing to listen to the voice of the Holy Spirit as He leads and guides you in this area. If you recognize the voice of the Holy Spirit, you will clearly know when He directs you to go on a fast. If we are physically able to, fasting is something we should do regularly to tame our flesh and draw closer to God. In doing that, we become more sensitive, more powerful and thereafter, our prayers - more effective.

I have seen some amazing things occur as a result of prayer and fasting. Not long after my family and I moved into our house, we found ourselves in need of an urgent financial blessing. At this time, we had some major obligations to meet and we literally needed a breakthrough. In desperation, I again presented my need to God and afterward, felt compelled to do a total fast. A passion arose inside of me and I told the Lord that I will not end my fast until He gave me the answer to my prayer. I was adamant about it. By that time, I had undertaken many fasts throughout the years, but never once did I ever tell the Lord such a thing. Instantly envisioning His loving smile, I heard Him reply, “How badly do you want it?”

It was on because I wanted it so badly! I think I kind of felt similar to how Jacob felt when he wrestled with God and told Him that he would not let Him go until He blessed him (Gen. 32:22-28). Like Jacob, I was determined to get my breakthrough.

The second day of the fast, I received a call from a first–time client who wanted a small service done for his company. We took a look at the job and got on it right away. On the fourth day, this man’s company gave us a contract for a much larger job somewhere around the tune of twenty-eight thousand dollars! What’s also amazing is that they had already decided to go with someone else before they ever contacted us, but turned around and gave it to us instead. That’s the favor of God, my friends! With my share of the profit, my husband and I were able to meet our obligations and we even gave some of it (the money) away!

My testimony is just an example of God honoring our obedience to His instructions. There are many more examples I can share with you of God doing exceptional things in our lives as a result of prayer and fasting. The key is to understand that in some cases, fasting must absolutely accompany our prayers. As I mentioned earlier, a spiritual battle rages and we must listen to the voice of the Holy Spirit that instructs us in all areas of our lives.

It is also important to note that the answer to our prayers many times appear after the fast has been completed. God is still responsible for the timing of our blessings and breakthroughs, but I whole-heartedly believe that because of such dramatic demonstration of our faith, humility and obedience, He, in His infinite wisdom, goes ahead and accelerates some things for us. We ought to trust and never doubt that God is working behind the scenes. Once we embark upon fasting with this mindset, we will not be disappointed in the least.

When we fast, we are waging war against the devil and his demons. We have prayed, but now we are bringing out the “big guns”, so to speak, against the kingdom of darkness. Satan continues to try his best to prevent us from experiencing that abundant life that Jesus wants us to have (3 John 1:2). Many times people cheat themselves out of God’s best because they are too laid-back and just want everything handed to them. If this describes you, I believe that your life lacks much power and you will not experience the awesome, supernatural, yoke-breaking power of God.

Ignite your passion and take authority over all those things Satan has thrown in your way. Be proactive and educate yourself in the area of prayer and fasting and soon you will grab hold of the wonderful blessings and breakthroughs that are just above you within your reach.

TWENTY-ONE

THE MYSTERIOUS REALM

I realize that the idea of there being a purgatory such as what Catholics allegedly believe or anything remotely similar to it may seem ridiculous or even be offensive to some people. However, I know I must mention what God has shown both my son and me regarding this mysterious realm that does, in fact, exist. My son was the first to experience this via a dream and then me via a vision. In fact, both of my children have the same gift as I do although I believe that theirs will become more active as time goes on. We all have had instances when we dreamed the same dream on the same night and the events unfolded shortly thereafter. They have also had premonitions that materialized.

Regardless of what you have been taught, what religion you adhere to or what others have said, there is a realm or existence in between this world as we know it and heaven and hell. Some call it purgatory even though their definition of it may differ from what Roman Catholics believe. According to dictionary.com, purgatory is any condition or place of temporary punishment, suffering, expiation, or the like. The Catholic church views purgatory basically as a state or place of punishment where the souls of those who die in God’s grace may make satisfaction for past sins and become fit for heaven (i.word.com/idictionary/purgatory).

I don’t know which viewpoint is correct - it’s not for me to judge - but I encourage you to open your mind to what I am about to share with you as this experience I had was not in any way a good one. I wish for no one to get stuck in such a place that appears to be as far away from God’s Presence as you can probably imagine.

One night, as I lie in bed watching a movie, the Lord allowed me to see a world or realm that I wasn’t ever sure existed. I found myself being pulled from my bed as if under the waves of the sea into a place that was gray and gloomy in appearance. It reminds me of a really overcast sky. I found myself in a building that I was unfamiliar with. This place had several small rooms and as I walked through (although I couldn’t feel myself walking), I noticed how almost colorless the whole scene, including all the rooms and everything inside the building was – just gray as far as I could see and everywhere I looked. The immediate feeling I got was one of loneliness. I felt completely, utterly alone and a shadow of uncertainty followed me everywhere I went. I didn’t understand why I was there – all I knew was that I wish I wasn’t and I yearned to be around my loved ones again. In this state, I wasn’t sure if I were dead. I thought I must be, yet I felt very much alive.

As I walked through the building, I didn’t see anyone at first, then I ended up in a room in which sat a long, oval table and some chairs. It looked like a boardroom. As I stood inside the room, a few people came into focus, then someone I recognized. She happened to be someone who had once dated a relative of mine. I remembered that we had a pretty good relationship before I ended up where I was. I waited to see if she noticed me and when she did, I asked if she remembered me. My heart lit up when she acknowledged that she did, although absent of any indication that she was glad to see me. She didn’t say anything more and I don’t remember saying anything else to her. I just wanted to be there with her for as long as I could. Otherwise, I felt so alone and didn’t know where I was going or why I was in such a place.

Suddenly, as if forced back up to the surface by the waves, I was in my bedroom again – the vision was gone. I sat up in bed with an unshakeable, sinking feeling hovering over me. I didn’t know what to make of the experience I had as I knew I had not fallen asleep. I couldn’t help remembering how very sad and lonely I had felt in that place and I really wanted to get it out of my mind. Eventually, I lay back down and tried to just relax and ease off to sleep, when I was abruptly pulled back under again. I actually felt myself going under by an invisible wave-like force and I was back in a gray, gloomy place. I was no longer in the unfamiliar building, but this time, at home.

Everywhere was gray just like it was when I was in the building. Nothing from my viewpoint had color and I believe this added to the somber, dismal feeling that lingered with me no matter where I went. Suddenly, I saw my daughter in her bedroom. She appeared to be fixing her hair. I could tell that the ceiling light was on in her room, but I couldn’t see the light – I guess I just sensed it. I was standing in the hallway and no matter how close I got to my daughter’s room door, she didn’t seem to notice me. I knew she could not see me like my acquaintance did when I was in the other place. I wanted to reach out and touch my daughter. I wanted to talk with her, joke with her, be with her – but I couldn’t. I felt more alone than before. I was devastated. I watched as she yelled something to someone else in the house just as happy as she always is. Standing all alone, I missed her so much. I missed my son and my husband – the life we had together. While in that dark place, I desperately wanted to get out, I wanted to be free of the silent torture I was enduring with no one to help me and no one to talk to.

Instantaneously, I was swept back into reality. I sat up in bed once again – afraid this time. It was then that I realized what had happened to me and why. The Lord wanted me to see and feel what that mysterious realm looks and feels like to those who are trapped there. All I know is that there is no joy in that state of consciousness; there is no contentment. You could still feel the love you have for others, but the loneliness and your physical separation from them are overwhelming. It is a deeply sad and dreary existence. I have no idea how long a soul wanders in that place; all I know is that I never want to go there and wish no one did. I believe that the only way we can avoid a place like that (which is a literal emotional hell within itself) is to do our best to live a life that is pleasing to God while here on earth, to love Him and to love others. God is concerned about the state of our hearts. Our actions will not always line up to perfection, but acknowledging our mistakes, living each day with genuine love in our hearts and staying close to our Creator is our very best chance of avoiding any form of purgatory.

My son had a dream that was eerily similar to my vision where he saw people propelled into another realm. There, they too wandered and were seemingly lost. Please, please, please, I beg you…resist evil, don’t focus on past mistakes, forgive yourself and forgive others, and live a life that is pleasing to God. Focus more than anything on the state of your heart – your motives; the reasons you do the things you do. Ask God to give you a new way of thinking – His way of thinking. Acknowledge the areas of your life that you know are not pleasing to Him and ask Him to change you, to strengthen and to show you His will for your life. You will not be perfect: You will still fall short from time to time, but the key is not to beat yourself up and stay down. Admit your mistakes, repent, get up, and move on. God doesn’t want any of us stuck in fear and condemnation. Once you learn to truly love Him and love others and don’t allow bitterness and resentment in your heart, you are on the right track. Just stay there.

This chapter was not written to frighten anyone, but so you would know the truth and understand that in spite of what arguments some persons might use to dispute this mysterious realm or state of being, there are also arguments and experiences such as mine that support it. Not every answer to every question is laid out in the Bible – although it’s our life manual. That’s why God also leads and directs us by His Spirit and, at times, gives us glimpses into the spiritual realm that is far beyond what the human mind can conceive. Sometimes they go against our very belief system. However, those He takes on such a journey, He also leaves with the responsibility of sharing what we have learned with others – particularly with those who are spiritually awakened and open enough to receive it.

CONCLUSION

Whether you believe in the mysterious realm / purgatory or not, is not nearly as important as the state of your heart. Scripture states “… For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart” (1 Sam. 16:7). The condition of your heart is what matters to God the most – not your mistakes or even your good works. Lord Jesus said in Matthew 7:21-23: “Not everyone who says to Me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of My Father who is in heaven. Many will say to Me on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name and in your name drive out demons and in your name perform many miracles?’ Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!”

Why do you think Jesus would take such a firm position? The answer is quite simple. You can do good things with a contaminated heart – one that is driven by selfish motives, absent of genuine love. God cannot and will not condone anything that is done without love, because He is love. We know how to love one another – our parents, our children, our friends, even our enemies because we came from Love: God. Check the state of your heart: Are you compassionate towards others or are you unmoved once the pain or the problem does not affect you personally? Do you care about people you don’t even know? What about those who are less fortunate than you are - do you really feel any compassion for their plight? Do you help others and even the less fortunate because inwardly you desperately seek recognition – wanting others to say how great you are and not because you are moved by the least bit of compassion? Do you attend church because it’s tradition or a formality, or is it because you want to please God and worship Him together as a body of believers? Is the church building the only place God hears your worship or sees you raising your hands toward Heaven? Do you worship Him when no one is around and there are no eyes to see and no mouth to say how “holy” you are? Do you only get down on your knees in prayer when you desperately need God to do something for you or do you get down on your knees sometimes just to pour your heart out and tell Him how much you love Him, appreciate Him and desire to be in His holy Presence? Are you cruel to children – take advantage of them and demean them because they cannot yet defend themselves? Are you a “tyrant” in private and a “saint” in public? Do you deceive or bamboozle your brother or sister for your own selfish gain, feeling absolutely no conviction for doing so, and yet ‘Lord, Lord’ is always in your mouth? Need I go on?

I encourage you, for your sake and all that you hold dear to check the state of your heart. Do a thorough inspection. Even if the whole world thinks you are just wonderful and do all the right things, if your heart isn’t pure – your motives not right and you are absent of love – you will never make it to heaven to live forever with the one and only true God. The Bible declares in 1 Corinthians 13:1-3: Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal.  And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.  And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing.

Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails...

Love is the key. A heart without genuine love is a heart that is doomed.

For those who do not believe in God or are not quite sure of His existence, I have two words for you: Take Notice! Take notice of your surroundings: The sky, the clouds, the sun, the moon, the seas, the trees, the animals, the plants, the flowers, the fruits & vegetables that are loaded with nutrients that keep our bodies healthy, the onion that is covered with its protective layer, the banana, the potato, the watermelon, the cantaloupe. Who provided those things and much more for us? A real, loving God that made us in His image and likeness. Take a look at yourself. You are His masterpiece. If you deny Him right now, you cannot deny the things around you: He created it all. No human being can create another human being. God created and owns the body and the soul. He loves variety and is amazingly creative. How do you think you got your creative side? He is divinely smart and intelligent. How do you think you got so smart? You surely didn’t make yourself that way: It came from your Creator.

The fact that you cannot deny nature gives you a responsibility to acknowledge that there is a God of the universe. For you to enjoy all the gifts He has given you in the form of the food, the water, the air you breathe, the creativity, the intellect, the love for yourself and that of others, etc. - and deny Him - would be an incomprehensible tragedy on your part. Whether you believe it or not, after you have taken your last breath, you will acknowledge the Supreme Being and you will be judged based on the fact that you didn’t do so when you had the chance.

I admonish you to take notice! Acknowledge your Creator, exist to please Him above all others, love with all sincerity and when your life on earth is over, Heaven will be your destination.

God bless you.

THIRTY WISDOM KEYS FROM THE PROFESSOR

(Feel free to share.)

1. A day spent worrying is a day wasted. Has worrying ever solved a single problem for you?

2. Your greatest struggle precedes your greatest reward.

3. Plant a seed of kindness into the life of someone today so that you will reap like harvest when you need it.

4. Don't be afraid of life's challenges. Instead, be assured that these too will pass.

5. Your success will only go as far as your ability to believe.

6. What God requires should mean far more to you than what you desire.

7. Do not allow disappointment to be a hindrance; instead, use it as a motivator.

8. Your humble heart, genuine spirit and heartfelt prayer in time of need will always get God's attention.

9. A friend to all is a friend to none.

10. If you control your thoughts, you control your life. Dwelling on negative people and negative circumstances will have an adverse effect on your well-being.

11. When you learn to appreciate the little things, you position yourself to receive bigger things.

12. A classic “know-it-all” will never have it all. Such a person is filled with arrogance and pride. The Bible declares that pride comes just before a fall.

13. The greatest gift you can ever give to another person is genuine, unconditional, unselfishly motivated love. Even if it is abused or never reciprocated, God's injection of His divine favor into your life will be worthy of envy.

14. It is impossible to be truly grateful and discouraged at the same time. You may not have what you want, but thank God for what you have.

15. The habit of sowing is more powerful than the amount you sow. Sow consistently so that you will reap consistently.

16. The degree at which you love will be the degree at which you live.

17. Your greatest setback from achieving your goal is a lack of confidence in God and a lack of confidence in yourself.

18. Let God and His will be your focus and you will always know that you are on the right path.

19. If you cherish what is in your hand too much to let it go, then there will never be any room for more.

20. Every moment you spend reflecting on the pain and disappointments of your past is a moment you have stolen from your life.

21. A negative mindset will undoubtedly produce negative results. The Law of Expectation: What you expect will gravitate toward you. If you guard your mind, you are guarding your life.

22. From this day forward, allow words of wisdom to penetrate your soul so that you can truly see a positive change in your life. Do not simply read the words, but instead, digest them and apply them to every area of your life.

23. God will never lead you to a place where He will not protect you. No matter what you're facing today, know - without a doubt - that God's got you covered.

24. If you can't envision it, there's a good chance, you will never have it.

25. Nothing is really as bad as it seems for the one whose heart is right with Christ because even on your worst day ever, God already has a plan to take you through it. You will never travel the journey of life without Supernatural help. What a privilege!

26. Do not allow circumstances to dictate what type of day you will have. Keep the peace that Jesus died a horrible death to give you.

27. A selfish heart will hinder you from receiving God's best in your life. A kind, loving heart will open the door for the miraculous.

28. If you are still here, it means you have not yet fulfilled your purpose on this earth. Determine to live a purpose-driven life.

29. If your mind doesn't have a picture of your future, it will replay the pain of your past.

30. When you come to the realization that without God you are nothing, you have nothing and you can do nothing, your greatest aim in life will always be to please Him no matter the cost.

You may contact Tanya via Email: pvhtanya@yahoo.com

or mail to:  P.O. Box: EE-17107

Nassau, Bahamas