Keep yourself in His Love

Mike Connell

Smashwords Edition

Copyright 2012 Mike Connell Ministries

http://mikeconnellministries.com

Summary: One of the most painful experiences in life is to go through experiences where you're unloved or where people react against you, where they speak against you or where there's physical or emotional violence, and you actually experience over a period of time a deep sense of lack of value, that I don't belong or I'm not valuable to anyone. You come to the conclusion in your heart that I'm unlovable.

Mon 26 Mar 2012 AM

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Now let me just start with a story about a person I met in Wellington some years ago. I was going down to speak at Promise Keepers, and I came out of the airport and waiting around, wondering who's going to pick me up, and this old drug rehabilitation van pulled up outside. So the transport was the drug rehabilitation van, and there was a fairly big Maori fellow there, with tattoos all over him, and he's sort of standing out there, and he said oh, this way bro'. I said okay, this must be the one. So I got in there with him, and anyway I got talking to him, found out his name was Peter and I said Peter, tell me a bit about yourself.

So he began to share about his background, and he'd had a very hard background; abusive father and family, and it was a very, very difficult painful background. It was quite distressing to hear about it, and he got involved in the gangs, he was then dealing drugs. He was the drug dealer, he was the one - and even while he's in the prison, he's got the deals going through his wife in the home. Anyway I said well what happened to you?

He said well, someone must have been praying for us. He said I got in here, and he said, you know, he said I started to feel so depressed after a while, and you know it's a tough place, hard to live in a prison. He said I started to feel very, very depressed and down, and he said I had a cell on my own, and he said there was one night there and he said I was just at the very end of myself, so actually what I did was I just put up my hands and said God, if you are real, Jesus, if you are in - because he said what had happened was, he'd had one of the other prisoners give his heart to the Lord, as a result of a team coming into the prison, and he thought the guy was a wimp. He wanted to beat him up, and he really was reacting, and the guy would not react back to him.

So this night he just got in the prison cell. He said God, if you're real show yourself to me, and he said it was like a light went on in the prison, and he said he felt the love of God. He felt the person - he didn't see anything, but he said he felt as though someone was standing there in front of him. He knew exactly who it was, that it was Jesus, and he said he began to feel love flow into his heart like he had never experienced in his life. He said it came over him in waves. He said I could not stop. He said here I am, I'm tattooed all over, I'm a gang leader and everyone's scared of me, I'm a hit man, and he said there I am on my knees, just blubbering like a baby. I sobbed.

I said well what happened? He said I just cried and cried and cried and cried. He said he couldn't stop crying. He said I cried for ages. It was loud. Everyone heard it, and they all figured I was having a breakdown, so I just stayed there, and he said the presence of Jesus so touched me in that cell. When I felt His love, all I could do was respond to Him. He said I received Jesus into my heart, alone in the cell, because I encountered the love of God, and he said I then wondered how on earth I'm going to live in prison, you know. Now I love Jesus, what's going to happen? I won't be tough anymore, and I'm not going to beat anyone up. So he wondered how he'd get on with his wife.

Anyway, his wife come in to see him the next day, and he was just wondering how he could break the news to her, that what had happened to him in the cell. Then she spoke up; she said honey, there's something I've got to tell you. He said what? She said well you know you've been asking me to deal all these drugs while you've been in jail? She said I went to a church meeting, and I gave my heart to Jesus. My life has changed. I got rid of all the drugs - and she's sort of waiting for the punches to start flying, and instead of that, you know, they both wept together, that in a place where both of them were in prison, one in the prison, and in chains in his heart, the other outside the prison, and in chains in her life; Jesus met both of them, and they were touched with His love, and both were changed.

He said we've been working with the drug rehabilitation ever since, and I've been able to speak to people in schools. I've got a purpose for my life, and it started when I connected to the love of Jesus Christ. His life was transformed by that experience, and I want to talk to you, because that same Jesus who loved him, is here to love you as well.

I want to share with you a verse that'll just help you, and I want to just speak to you about just a couple of things out of this verse, and I want to give you a couple of practical keys, very, very simple practical keys and I want us to read if you've got a Bible with you, and read in Jude which is a one page book, just before the Book of Revelations, so it's not very hard to find, you know. Let's see if you can find it there and it says - this is what it says. It says in Verse 20, but you beloved - so it's talking then about people who are mocking, walking in ungodly lust, sensual people having divisions and whatever, He says but you, He said you - notice what it tells us here - He said building yourself up in your most Holy Faith, praying in the Holy Ghost, keep yourselves in the love of God, looking expectantly for the mercy of Jesus Christ. Keep yourself in the love of God.

One of the things that's one of the most painful experiences in life, is to go through experiences where you're unloved, or where people react against you, where they speak against you, or where you're in a home which is hostile, where there's violence, verbal violence, physical violence, emotional violence, and you actually experience over a period of time, a deep sense of lack of value, that I don't belong, or I'm not valuable to anyone. This is one of the most painful experiences.

You come to the conclusion in your heart that I'm unlovable. It becomes a very, very deep pain that people live with in life, and one of the ways people try and cope with the pain, is to find relationships that will minister to the emptiness in their heart. We see it today, a generation where families are broken down, there's no fathers, and there's a struggle among young men and young women to feel loved and of value. It's hard for a young person to feel of great value when their father has abandoned them or abused them. It's hard to feel of great value when you've been through painful experiences in life.

Now most people come to the conclusion I'm not much value, and so they go looking for something to fix it, looking for something. The most common place is in relationships. Let me tell you this young people; if you go into a relationship looking for someone to meet the need in your life to be loved, the relationship will fail. It can never succeed, because you're trying to draw something out of someone else to meet a need in your heart, that can never be met just through that relationship.

The Bible tells us God is love. We're made for a dynamic relationship and connection with Him. If you don't discover the love of God personally, and learn how to take hold of it day by day in your life, you will look for a substitute. The substitute could be a relationship. I've seen so many young girls ruin their lives, some boy drew them in telling them he loved them, and all he wanted to do was lust after them. This is not going to work, and what happens is the person's left even more sensing and believing they're unloved, unlovable, because of the shame they carry in their life.

Listen and we've prayed for - Lyn's prayed for many, I've prayed for many. Heaps and heaps of people that have just gone through these terrible experiences, and really the issue is something that only God can sort out in your life, only God can meet that need in your life. So people turn to drugs. Why are they looking for drugs? They're looking for a hit to feel good. Why do they want to feel good? Because something is missing in their heart. People turn to all kinds of things. Some of them turn into competitive sport, some turn into different kinds of work, some just get busy to try and bury the pain.

Listen, I remember praying for one man. He was in his 60s and he broke down - this is a businessman, a successful businessman - he broke down and wept and wept and wept. Even though he'd worked hard to succeed, nothing could stop the pain in his heart, that I'm actually unlovable. He thought that if he worked hard enough, he would be lovable. So God wants to help you with this, and in this verse I want to share with you, just some simple keys that'll help you just understand how to deal with this issue.

You can't find what you're looking for. There's no one out there will meet your need to be loved, and so here's the thing; you've got to actually establish that in your own heart. The Bible says that if we are rooted and grounded in the love of God, in Jesus Christ, then God fills us. Our life begins to have purpose and impact. Isn't it a very, very simple thing? Let me just talk to you then. I'm going to give you a couple of reasons why it is that people struggle so much, and this is something that many of you struggle with.

I know we've talked with, and counselled with, so many young people, so many broken relationships. I've watched people go from one relationship to another, and it's like the same thing keeps breaking down, breaking down, breaking down, because at the core of their being, they're not established in Christ, and in the love He has. And I want to help you in just a moment how to do that. One of the first things to see is why is there such a struggle? Why is it I struggle to feel love? Why is it I struggle in my heart to be lovable? Why do I have that struggle? Why is it that at times in the middle of a crowd - and I can remember it when I was a young person in university. I can remember being in a crowd in a party one night, and everyone's drinking, the music's all raging and pumping, and then right in the middle of that party - and I'm drinking. I probably had too much that night, and I'm right in the middle of the party.

Suddenly overwhelming loneliness and feeling unloved came into me, and I thought this is crazy! I'm in the middle of a whole group of people. What is this thing that seems to come against me? So let me explain to you what it is, and then how to deal with it very quickly, with some just simple keys to help you deal with it.

The first thing to realise is that you have a personal adversary, the devil, who wants to lay on you all his rejection, and all his resentment, and bitterness, because once the devil actually walked in the realms of God and experienced personally the love of God, but when he sinned he was totally, totally rejected, and if there's one thing is his mission in life it's this; it's to put on you his rejection, so you feel totally unloved, and begin to ruin your life trying to find a way to heal that need in your heart.

In John 8, I think Verse 44, it says that the devil is the father of lies, so if demonic spirits were attacking you which they do, they don't come and announce I'm attacking you. You don't have a spirit sort of just turn up and say well I think I'm going to pick a fight with you. It doesn't work like that - they operate invisibly, and so you live in a physical world with physical relationships, but you also live in a spirit world. In the spirit world, demonic spirits come to attack, so how does the spirit attack you? How would you know if something was attacking you? Very, very simply, when a spirit comes, it comes near. It draws near, just like I'm drawing near right now, and when it becomes near, it begins to fill your mind with certain kinds of thoughts, begins to fill your emotions, with certain kinds of feelings.

So when a spirit comes near, it will invade you with its thoughts, and its emotions, and you'll think they're mine. You won't discern necessarily that this comes from outside you. You'll think that's me - and so demonic spirits, they torment people, and Jesus made it very clear. The devil is the father of lies, so what he'll do is, he'll come near to you when something happens in your life, and he'll just sow a seed in your mind of thoughts and things, oh, that must mean I'm unlovable.

So when does he come to do that? Well he comes not all the time. He comes periodically, in waves, and I'll show you what to do with it, because I don't know anyone who hasn't experienced this. You'll have sudden times when this thing suddenly overwhelms you. You feel like all - no awareness that God is here. All you're aware of, is just the emotions and turmoil you've got inside. So when do these things come, when do they attack you? I'll give you some examples when they attack. They attack you when you sin and fail. They'll come immediately in to accuse you, condemn you and cause you to believe in your heart, you can't be loved.

When we sin sexually, that's the time they come the most strongest, and they push on you an accusation, and a condemnation, you're unlovable. There's nothing good about you. Look at what you have done. Demons come this way. That's how they work. They fill your mind when you've failed, when there's pain in life. Perhaps you have a disappointment, and a setback in life; suddenly there'll be this pressure come on you out of the spirit world. Your mind and emotions will begin to fill up, and you begin to think that you're a failure, or you may have a difficulty in a relationship - which is normal, because all relationships have difficulties - and then suddenly in the midst of that difficulty in the relationship, you'll have these overwhelming thoughts and feelings come into your mind; oh, I'm just not acceptable, unloved and this is not working out. I need to get out of here.

Or you'll have a situation come in your life where a disappointment has come, and suddenly your mind and heart become overwhelmed and invaded with thoughts, feelings, emotions. That is a spirit pushing on you. It is the father of lies, and what he is doing is sowing into you right at that point, a lie that you are not of value, that you are not loved.

Now here's the deal. If you will accept that lie, if you will believe what he says, and put it in your heart at that moment, he has power to torment you, and keep you in torment. I've seen heaps of Christians - it's been just a heartbreak for me over years to watch so many Christians. God has given you access to His love, and His presence, and to be able to live in that presence, and to actually feel and experience that love day by day, yet most people don't. What they experience instead are all kinds of turmoil, and their emotions and soul feeling unloved, not of value.

Listen: you better get real on this. There is a fight for your life, and your destiny, and you've got to decide you'll stand up, and who you're going to believe. You've got to do the things that will position you to experience the love of God consistently, and to be able to recognise and overcome those things when they come against you. Listen, this is a number of ways that the devil comes I'll share - let me just show you how you can deal with it, very, very simple. It's not very, very hard. When he comes, it's always the same way, comes through the same avenues, and he comes ,and you end up with the same thoughts.

Here's the core of the problem. In Proverbs 4:23 it says, guard your heart with all diligence, because whatever you believe in your heart, is going to flow out in the rest of your life, so what counts is what you believe in your heart. If you have a judgement in your heart, that formed when you were younger, I'm unlovable, I'm of no value, I have to work hard or I'll never make it; if you have judgements in your heart about yourself, those judgements will sit there, and demons will use them and continually torment them, until you break your agreement with those things.

You are of great value. You are loved. The Bible says nothing can separate you from the love of God and Jesus Christ, nothing, nothing. Failure, nothing! Jesus paid for all your failures. Disappointments, nothing! Nothing can keep you from the love of God. Nothing will cause God to change His mind about you. Nothing you do - well you don't understand, I've done this or I had an abortion, I had this. No, no, no. Nothing you can do, will change God's view of you! He is love. He loves you unconditionally. He wants you to be filled with that love. Don't listen to the lies of condemnation. Don't listen to the judgements in your heart. Learn to recognise the voice that comes from God, the voice that comes from demonic spirits pushing you down and depressing you, because the moment you start down the track of beginning to start to doubt that God loves you, to doubt the reality of His care for you, to doubt the reality of His watching over you - as soon as you go down that track, then depression and all kinds of things come around. Then you're looking for a way out of the pain.

Now listen, you don't have to live like that. You can live differently. We're called to live differently. We're called to live, and walk, and enjoy the love of God, and it tells us some simple keys in there how to do it. It all has to do with you believing. It tells us you beloved, you're different, so praying in Holy Ghost, praying in the spirit, praying in tongues is a great gift to energise, and make your spirit man come alive, so you are aware of the Holy Spirit, because when you're praying in tongues, the Bible tells us your spirit is praying, the Holy Ghost is rising up inside you. The spirit of God is expressing through you, so every time I pray in tongues, I'm aware the spirit of God is with me, and if I pray in tongues, my spirit will start to arise above the conflicts of the soul.

So number one, you need to start to do some time with God, and these are the sorts of things you can do, very simply. You spend time praying in the spirit. Secondly, you begin to meditate on what God says about you. Imagine it, what it would feel like to have God with you, loving you, being near to you. I took some weeks imagining the reality of God with me, God near me, His friendship to me. I just took time to imagine it. I didn't feel anything except a bit stupid at first, and if I'd stopped when I felt stupid, I'd have never have come to where I have in life now. Someone had said a great thing to me. They said if you knew that by pushing against this problem and resolving it, your life would change, wouldn't it be worth it?

I've looked all over. I've ministered all over New Zealand, but one of the most common problems I find right through New Zealand is simply this: people struggle with rejection, and believing they're unlovable, and when they give way to those thoughts and emotions ,they become depressed, lose connection with God, and then they just become religious. We've got to know and walk in the reality, I am loved by my Father. So how can it happen? Well I took time to meditate in it, so for probably three to four weeks, every day I'd rise up, pray in tongues, speak and declare those demons are defeated, and then meditate that God loves me, and His presence is with me, and I would meditate and meditate. I'd imagine standing there, and God is with me, all the love that I would feel. I began to meditate in those things. You know what? It took me about three to four weeks, and then one day, I suddenly experienced God's love in the most very powerful way. It started to flow over my life, through me. I broke down and wept and wept and I had an encounter and experience with God, so I've practised re-meditating on that regularly.

What happens is, you begin to establish in your life, a pattern of feeling the love of God in your life. You have to allow your imagination to go there, and allow yourself to imagine what would it feel like to be totally surrounded by the love of God, and to stay there until you've been to experience it. So that's a simple thing you could do.

Second thing I found I needed to do was this; I needed to break my agreement with the lie that I'm of no value, that I'm unlovable. If you hold that in your heart, it will continue to trouble you. You see, you're responsible for what's in your heart, even if it's a lie, and if you've got a lie in your heart, the devil will just use it to constantly torment you. He'll leave you alone for a while, and then something will go wrong and next thing you know you feel this weight and pressure around you, and your emotions and in your spirit. You've got to push it away, and see it for what it is, just a tormenting spirit.

And so number one, spend time with God establishing the truth that you're loved in your heart, through meditation, acknowledging Him, praying in tongues, but mostly through meditation and confession of the word of God. It does it. I can tell you now, I can absolutely guarantee it does it. I can go and take time alone, and then very quickly start to feel His love flowing to me. I couldn't do that one time. I can do it now, and second thing that we'll share is, deal with what's in your heart. If you've got resentment and bitterness, if you've got judgements in your heart about yourself, then repent of them. Just break your agreement with them, and then every time one of those negative thoughts come, just see it for what it is. Something like this will happen, because I remember being in a situation, two young men at the door there and - I may have shared this with you before - and one of them had quite a deep root of rejection. He felt unloved, unloved by fathers, and unloved by men, and I happened to walk in very, very busy and I was just a bit preoccupied. They both said hi, how you doing Pastor? I didn't hear it because I was involved in something else.

One of them just shrugged it off, oh, I'll catch up with him later. The other one, this is what he thought; that Pastor doesn't like me, and so all through that, he'd turned out to the church service to worship God and enjoy God, and all he could do was experience torment the whole service, because he'd taken hold of a lie, and the lie now was tormenting him. See, you've got to make decisions what you let live in your head. Your head is the most valuable real estate you have. It is.

You go to Auckland. It costs you hundreds of thousands of dollars to buy property. Believe me, your head is very valuable property. You be careful what you allow to get in there. You let the lies get in there, it'll affect the way you think, the way you see God, the way you run your life, the way you run your relationships. You're better than that! You're better than that. God absolutely and unconditionally loves you. The Bible's very clear. Nothing, nothing can separate us from the love of God and Jesus Christ. Nothing. My failures, not my failures. What if I really blow it? No if I really blow it. It makes no difference. What if I sin? That makes no difference. Oh, maybe the devil will piggyback on it and condemn me a bit, but it doesn't change God's view. He says I've dealt with all your sins. Why don't you believe me? Step up, get forgiven, and get on with being loved, get on with walking with me.

Listen, you've got to assert yourself to believe God. If you believe in those things that come around you, which reject you, they'll govern your life. Why not make a decision? How many know what I'm talking about? How many struggle with these kinds of things? There's so many people. Why don't you make a decision, I will never again receive into my mind and heart any thought that I'm unloved and of no value. I will not harbour such judgements against me, but I will hold the truth that I am totally loved by God. I'll spend time to meditate in that truth, and that truth, when I embrace it, will set me free.

It's not something that you just do it once, it's over and done with. It becomes a lifestyle, and there are times when things will be just really good and you'll have a breakthrough for a while, and then a pressure will come again, and you'll have to stand up and hold the truth of God's word in your life. I guarantee that almost certainly in this coming week, you'll have some experience where something goes wrong, and the moment something goes wrong, you have a setback or disappointment or someone hurts or says something about you, in that moment of time you'll have an emotion flood your soul. You just stop, and look at what it is, and ask what I really see, and what am I thinking about that? I reject the lie there's something wrong with me. I believe I am totally accepted in God's eyes, and I'm going to walk in that freedom. I will not be put down. I will not be devalued by life, but I believe God will use life circumstances to make me a great person. It's a choice.

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Table of Contents

Keep Yourself in His Love

Midpoint