To Know God As Father

Written By Lisa Cline

Learn about my other books or read my blog entries at

IAmTrustingGod.com

Table Of Contents

Some are never there

Some Are Abusive

Some are Depressed

Some Never Stop Pressuring

Some are Greedy

Some are pretty good

When you are Devastated

Trust God

Believe God

Know God

Follow God

Exemplify God

Love God

Serve God

Other Books By Lisa Cline

Author Info

One Last Thing…This Will Only Take A Moment

To Know God as Father by Lisa Cline

Copyright © 2011-2014 Lisa Cline

All rights reserved. This book is protected under the copyright laws of the

United States of America. This book may not be copied or reprinted for commercial

gain or profit.

Unless otherwise indicated, Scripture quotations are taken from:

The Holy Bible, English Standard Version®, copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked MSG are taken from THE MESSAGE.

Copyright © by Eugene H. Peterson 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002.

Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.

Scripture quotations marked NIV are taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW

INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by

Biblica, Inc.™ Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

Scripture quotations marked AMP are taken from the Amplified® Bible, ©

1954, 1958, 1962, 1964, 1965, 1987 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission.

Scripture quotations marked CEV are taken from the New Century Version

of the Bible, copyright © 2005 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission.

Scripture quotations marked NLT are taken from the Holy Bible. New

Living Translation copyright © 1996 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by

permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All

rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked NKJV are taken from the New King James

Version®. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All

rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked GOD’S WORD are taken from the God’s

Word translation of the Bible.

Scripture quotations marked NCV are taken from the New Century Version

of the Bible, copyright © 2005 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission.

Scripture quotations marked KJV are taken from the King James Version of

the Bible.

ISBN 978-1-58169-403-1

For Worldwide Distribution

Printed in the U.S.A.

Axiom Press

P.O. Box 191540 • Mobile, AL 36619

800-367-8203

For Allan

Brave like the ocean

Fierce like the wind

My daddy knew everything

From the outside in

To speak as thunder

Protects as rain

There isn’t one thing

That time can’t change

We’ll see you in heaven

When we all get through

Cause there will never be a day

Where we don’t miss you

Written for her father by MaryJo Cline, age 14

On the eve of his third anniversary in heaven

Below are what some Amazon reviewers are saying about this book:

Love, love, love this book ~ Psparks

I'm glad I was drawn to this book. It was amazing. Thank you Lisa Cline for writing this book. Thank you Jesus ~ Sarah C.

This book is so good! It is well written and easy to read and follow...No matter who you are or where you've been, this book will entertain you and help you along your way! Read it!!! ~ Kathy P

Very insightful book that you will enjoy and will want to re-read. Would like more from this author. Would also make a great gift for anyone ~ Sherrylynn B

I really believe this book was an inspiration. It is a great book that draws in the fact that God loves us and wants us to have a close relationship with us. ~ Deb

A wonderful book written from the heart by a new author who has a heart for helping others to heal. ~Cellanne

Some are never there

She sat on the stoop waiting, her heart heavy and aching with anticipation so strongly that at times she wished she didn’t have one. She had been there for an hour or more with no sign. Yet she wasn’t too worried because she had her ace in the hole.

Another hour. She was lost in thought when her mama came up behind her and tried to gently guide her into the house. She would have none of it. Breaking from her mother’s grasp she said defiantly, “No! This time he is coming! He is. I know it deep, deep in me. He is!” Her words were strong yet after her mother left her she could not help but to let out a sigh and ask herself, “Is he really?”

Many times her resolve was tempted with things like a bike ride to the park with the next door neighbor’s family (a real one, she thought to herself) or a game of kick the can in the street with a group of kids from the neighborhood. But she would not budge. She was convinced that this time he would come. Sure, in the past he may not have always kept his word, but this time was different.

Today was her tenth birthday, and instead of the latest game, record, or book, she had asked for and (because money was tight) received only three things: a grown up dress (not from the kid section), a pretty pink shawl, and a brand new pair of one inch heels. She had never worn high heels before, so had practiced and practiced in them until she could walk without tottering. She couldn’t wait to show off her new skill to her daddy.

He had once told her in the past that when she was more grown up he would spend more time with her. “Grown up how?” she had asked. He pointed to a woman who wore a long flowing dress with a pink shawl and high heels. From then on she dreamed of the day when she would be old enough to wear high heels and a long flowing dress.

Another hour and the air was starting to get a chill in it. She could not tell, but her mother was inside frantically trying to get a hold of him to no avail. He was as he always was.

Another hour and the darkness started to descend. It was then she knew the truth... you know, that thing that’ll set you free. So she took off the high heels that she had practiced so hard to walk in, threw them away, and went inside. Heavy-hearted, she went straight to bed.

When her mother came in later to tell her how sorry she was, the little girl just shrugged her shoulders and remarked, “Who needs a father anyway?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

How many of us have asked ourselves that question? People who grow up with fathers absent from the home or with fathers in the home but emotionally distant often feel as if they are to blame. As if they themselves caused their own abandonment.

And they feel alone, as if they are the only one. Yet one USA. Report[1] found that, there are an estimated 13.7 million single parents raising 21.8 million children. That must be why, when poled, 72.2 % of the U.S. population says that the problem of absentee fathers is the most significant family or social problem facing America today.

Some of the consequences of fatherless teens are:

63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes.

71% of all high school dropouts come from fatherless homes.

70% of juveniles in state operated institutions come from fatherless homes.

85% of all youths in prisons grew up in fatherless homes.

There is a very clear correlation between troubled youths and those who were raised with an absentee father. This is nothing new either. Even way back in biblical times there were children who suffered the same fate.

Take for instance the story of a man who was named Jephthah the Gileadite. Like many of us Jephthah did not have that great a start in life. His mother was a prostitute and his father was unfaithful to his wife (not to mention a bad example for his sons whom he already had), and to top it off he was not to lucky in the name department either.

Surprisingly, Jephthah grew up in his father’s home, yet it is safe to assume the he grew up without any father son bonding moments. This was sure to have caused Jephthah many years of wondering “What’s so wrong with me that my own father doesn't want anything to do with me?”

When his brothers grew up they did not want to share anything passed on from their father. They did not care for the fate of their half-brother, so they booted Jephthah to the curb.

You shall not have an inheritance in our father's house,

for you are the son of another woman.[2]

Jephthah, grieved over his loss of his family (as bad as they were) and a little scared, went to live in the land of Tob. There he took to the streets, and became the leader of a band of robbers. He did such a good job in fact, that the very people who had kicked him when he was down, came to him and asked him to be in charge of their army.

This did not go over to will with him;

But Jephthah said to the elders of Gilead, “Did you not hate me and drive me out of my father's house? Why have you come to me now when you are in distress?”[3]

Wesley's commentary says what he really meant was "[did you not] deprive me of all share in my father's goods, which, though a bastard, was due to me." [i]

Let me just say right here that I like Jephthah! He had spunk. He was not afraid to call things as he saw them. He was like "Ok fine, so I was not lucky enough to be born a ‘legitimate’ child like you were, but really! Did you have to be so cold hearted? I was his son after all, and therefore I should have gotten something!"

The elders (of whom at least one was a brother) were like (and I'm defiantly paraphrasing here), "Hey why bring up the past, what matters is the present and our wanting to keep living in it. So let's just forget all about the horrible way we treated you because right now we want you to be our leader. We have seen the light."

Jephthah took this into consideration, which meant that he was wise. He did not reciprocate what they had done to him.

Jephthah said to the elders of Gilead, “If you bring me home again to fight against the Ammonites, and the Lord gives them over to me, I will be your head.” And the elders of Gilead said to Jephthah, “The Lord will be witness between us, if we do not do as you say.” So Jephthah went with the elders of Gilead, and the people made him head and leader over them. “The LORD is our witness,” the elders replied. “We promise to do whatever you say.”[4]

It was imperative to Jephthah that he win the battle. He had gone from being an outcast, a nobody in their eyes, to someone they looked up to.

The first thing he did was to try and settle the dispute amicably with the enemy, but that did not work. Judges 11:29-31 tells what happened next;

Then the Spirit of the Lord was upon Jephthah, and he passed through Gilead and Manasseh and passed on to Mizpah of Gilead, and from Mizpah of Gilead he passed on to the Ammonites.

So the “Spirit of the Lord was upon Jephthah ". This means that God was for him. He was not only saying to Jephthah "I am giving you strength to win this battle," but He was in essence saying "I am with you, I am for you. And together we are going to win this war."

Sounds like Jephthah had all he needed to win the battle against the Ammonites.

With God on his side, he couldn’t lose! But that very fact eluded Jephthah, as we see from his following actions...

Jephthah made a vow to the Lord and said, “If you will give the Ammonites into my hand, then whatever comes out from the doors of my house to meet me when I return in peace from the Ammonites shall be the Lord's, and I will offer it up for a burnt offering.”[5]

Wow! Think about that for a moment. A burnt offering was something they did to animals, not something they did to people who could open the door and come out of a house.

What was he thinking? Was he that scared?

Even though God had already stood behind Jephthah, he simply didn't trust Him.

Jephthah had most likely never known his father to stand with him in times of adversity or times of triumph. And it was hard for Jephthah to believe that when God's Spirit came upon him, it would remain for the length of the battle.

Jephthah made a deal with God because he thought Gods promise wasn't enough.

What he didn't realize is that through all his pain, his shame, and feelings of unworthiness, God was with him whispering “No need to prove yourself or do anything extra, you are my child and you are loved just as you are.”

Trusting a heavenly father is such a hard thing to do when you have grown up with an earthly father who has either never been there or who has let you down time and again.

So Jephthah made that vow and he soon regretted it. Because even thou he went on to beat the Ammonites, when he came home, to his horror, instead of a servant greeting him…

His daughter came out with tambourines and with dances. She was his only child; besides her he had neither son nor daughter. And as soon as he saw her, he tore his clothes and said, “Alas, my daughter! You have brought me very low, and you have become the cause of great trouble to me. For I have opened my mouth to the Lord, and I cannot take back my vow.”[6]

When our earthly father is messed up, distanced, or just quiet in our lives, we can become deeply wounded. If left unchecked, those wounds can cause an emptiness that causes us to make decisions about who God is, who we are, and what matters most, based solely on our feelings. Jephthah did that. Jephthah wanted to make right the things that had wronged him. He wanted to be in a position of power where he never again could be tossed to the curb, and he wanted it more than he wanted anything, including his only child.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Making decisions out of our own hurt is not the wisest choice, for it tends to lead to nothing but a mess.

They couldn’t believe it. In fact, they could barely contain their excitement as they pulled into the driveway. The house was so big. Much, much bigger that the cramped two bedroom flat in the village that they sublet from a traveling salesman.

They did so want children and as they exited the car they looked at each other with joy knowing that their dream would soon be a reality.

They turned and walked toward the front door where waiting for them was Great-Aunt-Lucy’s Lawyer. He told them over the phone that he had a few things he wanted to explain about Great-Aunt-Lucy and the house before they took ownership.

“What’s to explain?” they asked between themselves. They had a house! She barely knew Great-Aunt Lucy. Actually while he had never met her, she only saw her Aunt once when she was about five. She remembers being given a frog by her aunt who talked a bit like Kermit. She had liked Aunt Lucy.

When she got older she asked her mom what ever happened to the toy frog lady. Her mother replied that she wasn’t sure. She guessed that she just liked being alone. So when they got the news of Great-Aunt-Lucy's death, they were not emotionally moved. That is until they found out about the home.

“Before I let you in,” began the lawyer, “There is something you must know about your aunt.”

“Yes?”

“Well your Aunt Lucy was a client of mine for many years, and I guess I was about as close a friend as she ever had. To be honest, to my knowledge she had no friends. Your aunt was a very unhappy person, she had some rough things happen to her, but she refused talk to anyone about it. Instead she locked herself away in her own little world.”

“Ok?” she said, not sure what this had to do with the house.

“I mean, she literally locked herself away.” The lawyer emphasized. “She allowed no one entry and never came out except to fetch the mail and to accept deliveries from the local grocers.”

“I’m still not sure why…”

“Why am I telling you this? I am telling you this because her stuffing things was how she lived her life. She stuffed her feelings because she couldn’t deal with them, and she stuffed her house with things as an extension of that.”

It was then that they knew. Their faces fell as they turned toward the house “Your saying……”

“Yep, to the rafters.”

They both ran to the window, where they saw things like old receipts mixed with old food bags alongside clothing and books that filled her living room literally to the ceiling.

They looked at each other, then at the Lawyer, and said, “We pass,” as they hurriedly got back in the car, and drove away. They realized that although the outside looked nice, cleaning up the inside would take more money and time than they had.

Aunt Lucy’s house could have been such a blessing to the young couple, just as Lucy herself could have blessed them, but by putting things between her and the world she created a mess too big for most people to handle.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When we act out of our pain we tend to make poor choices, which can result in things like loss of jobs, friends, dreams, etc. So, as a rule, when we find that we are spending most of our time alone, it is good to ask ourselves, if we are stuffing our pain behind things like work, shopping, drinking, etc.

Statistics show that children of absentee fathers are more likely to do drugs, drop out of school, go to jail, and so on. But what those statistics don’t show is the unlimited potential of those who allow God to rid them of all that stuff they have pushed down and then fill them with the truth about who they are, whose they are, and who they were created to be.

Fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you.[7]

Instead of holding bitterness, our minds can hold belief. Instead of clinging to anger, we can cling to the truth. And instead being wrapped in sadness, we can be secure in the knowledge that we are loved and will never be forsaken.

It is important to note, however, that until we learn to forgive our earthly fathers, we will never be free. Why?

Because blaming fathers for being absent is a waste of time. No boy grows up and says, “I can’t wait to have children so that I can ignore them.” There was a reason that they chose - whether consciously or subconsciously - to distance themselves, and that reason will always find its root in their own pain. What do I mean? I mean that maybe they were ignored by their fathers and so they learned to ignore. Or maybe, they were abused growing up, which caused them to subconsciously distance themselves from their children as a means of protecting them (kind of like an “I love you so much that I don’t want to hurt you so I will keep my distance” sort of a thing).

Unforgiveness also prevents healing. Holding on to anger and bitterness will not change our past, but letting it go will change our future. It does not take a surgeon to realize, that the damage we do to our body when we stuff down and hold onto past hurts.

I know how tempting it can be to want to hold on to anger.

My father was absent from my life about 99.9% of the time I was growing up. It left me feeling worthless, and after years of trying everything that I could think of to feel the void, I was left broken-hearted and miserable.

It wasn’t until I let go of the anger and grabbed a hold of God that He was able to begin the healing process in me.

Sometimes we may think that we have no choice, but I am here to say that is a lie straight from the pit of hell. We can choose to forgive. We can be free.

Unforgiveness also keeps us from knowing God.

It was not an easy leap to think of my heavenly Father in a different light than my earthly father. I was about twenty-one when my mother tried to get me to read a Christian book written by a grown child of an absentee father.

I clearly remember thinking, “Forget that! I don’t want a father. If God is a father then that means He is not to be trusted.” I told my mom I didn’t want to read the book. And I didn’t, though I now wished I had. Doing so would have saved me about fifteen years of low-level living.

The sad thing is that when I had that conversation with my mom, I was standing in a church library. Incredibly I went to church almost every Sunday and yet I did not have the knowledge of what a wonderful Father God is. Why? Because I was stuck. My “right” to be angry and my distrust of any man that dare call himself father kept me stuck.

Little did I realize at the time that God is no natural man. Even the best father in the world cannot compare to God, nor should he try. Although God originally designed fathers to give us a small taste of Himself, it is important to remember that just because some human is messed up and dysfunctional, God is not.

God is all anyone could ever want in a father and more!

But He will never force a relationship with us.

Though it is His desire to have an intimate relationship with each and every one of his children, He is not looking for “Furby-type” children. By that I mean that although Furby (a stuffed toy with a cute face that is preprogrammed to say “I love you” to its owner) seems sincere in it profession of love, underneath all that fluff the owner knows it is only a machine-its words are empty ones. If my kids only said "I love you" only because they were programmed to, I would be heartbroken.

Once I actually wrote a song titled “God Don’t Want No Furby Kind Of Love.” It was a terrible song, but its message was true. He wants us to come to Him because we realize that our lives are meaningless without Him. If God was going to turn us into robots when we became Christians, then He would have made us robots to begin with. So remember, although God first chose us, we still have to choose Him.

God wants His kids (that’s us, by the way) to run to Him with arms and hearts wide open, ready to know and love Him. But He realizes that some of us might take a while to get there. That’s okay though, because God is patient, and He lets us make our mistakes while He works quietly behind the scenes to draw us to Himself. Then as soon as we get close enough to grab on to Him, with even one pinky finger upturned, He will begin the slow and steady process of healing our hearts and setting us free from everything that keeps us from being who we were created to be.

In a few days it will be Father’s Day. It will mark the first time that my children have no Earthly father in whom to give their cards and funny presents too. Sadly, their father and my beloved husband of eighteen years passed away just two months ago. It is hard being young, losing a parent, and wondering why. My heart aches for them, yet I am able to find peace in the fact that they are not alone. They still have not only a mother but also a heavenly Father who deeply, deeply loves them. And you know what? He loves you too!

The truth is that, yes, our earthly fathers are human. And yes, they can let us down. But how extremely lucky are we to have a heavenly Father who will pick us up, dust us off, and set us on a path that He alone has laid out for us? A path that will lead us to the desires of our heart and will leave us with a peace that only our true Father - our Heavenly Father - can give us?

To know God as Father means to know that He is a “Father to the fatherless” (Psalm 68:5) and He “will never leave you or forsake you” (Deuteronomy 31:6). So get out that pinky, grab a hold, and watch as He heals your heart and takes you places you never even dreamed of.

Some Are Abusive

The bell rang, signifying the end of class. All but one of the students got up and quickly filed out of the classroom. All except for Danny stayed behind and slowly exited his chair, and as he always did, shuffled over to where his teacher was sitting at the desk grading papers.

“Teacher?”

“Yes Danny?” The teacher looked up at him, though she could hardly stand to do so.

“Do you have anything you need help with?”

“Yes,” thought his teacher, “yes I do. Why don’t you come home with me, and I will give you a million things to do, a million reasons why you will never again have to go home to abuse at the hands of those who are supposed to love you the most.

But the problem, Danny? You see, the problem is that, although I have exhausted every avenue of legal action that I - as your third grade teacher - can take, the authorities have decided there is not enough evidence. And although I want to take you and run, I know that is not wise. So instead I will do the best each day to encourage you and lift your spirits. Let you know how amazing you are. And then, I will do what is best for you. The thing that will keep you from incurring their wrath for being late.”

The teacher smiled sweetly. With a tear in her eye and a lump in her throat, she said “Not today, sweetheart, you better get on home now.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Home is supposed to be a secure oasis where we can let down our guard, relax, and be revived. For Danny, as it is for far too many children, home is more like a desert, a lonely, desolate, and barren place from which there is no protection.

The statistics[8] are overwhelming:

A report of child abuse is made every ten seconds.

Almost five children die every day as a result of child abuse. More than three out of four are under the age of four.

Types of abuse include

Neglect = 59%

Physical abuse = 10%

Sexual abuse = 7.6%

Psychological maltreatment = 4.2%

Medical neglect = .9%

Other forms of abuse = 17.9%

How heartbreaking is it that the place that is supposed to be our soft spot to land is too often made of barbed wire, causing us to be wounded with scars that never fade.

God created children to be nurtured, loved, and raised up in the way they should go. It was never His intention that they be so harshly treated. The Bible says in Proverbs 29:11 that "A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control" (NIV). To God, a man who does not control his anger is a fool, plain and simple.

So if God doesn’t approve of the abuse, why does He allow it to happen? To find the answer to that question, we have to go back to the beginning.

In Genesis Chapter 1we read about the creation of the world.  If I were to write about it I would say, “In the beginning the world was created beautiful and pristine, much like a brand-new white Ping-Pong ball.”

Interestingly, the creation story ends with God saw all that He had made, and it was very good (verse 31 NIV). Take note that it does not say that “it was kind of good” or “a little bit good.” No, it says that “all” God made was good. And because they were part of creation, “all” includes man and woman.

So God created man and woman (Adam and Eve) to be “very good” and yet He also created them to have “free will.”

He put them in paradise, with everything they ever would need or want. But He included something (a tree and its fruit) they couldn’t have saying, “You can have it all. You can do what you like…only stay away from that one tree. If you are hungry eat the fruit from any of the hundreds of tree around you, but leave that one tree alone.” That way they would have the ability to not only choose between right and wrong, but between having a relationship with Him and rejecting Him.

When the first humans, Adam and Eve, chose to eat the fruit of the only tree that God had forbidden them to eat from, they in essence chose evil over God. Sin entered the world and their disobedience cause them to instantly giving the control of the world (that God had given them) to Satan.

Webster’s 1826 Dictionary says that sin is “all evil thoughts, purposes, words and desires, whatever is contrary to God's commands or law.”

Sin is like a disease that has rapidly spread, covering everything in its path with a warped sense of reality. But sin will never destroy God's good creation.

Imagine mashing together many colors of Play-Doh and then covering that pristine white Ping-Pong ball with them. It may look like the Ping-Pong ball is just a jumbled mess, but were you to take the Play-Doh off, you would still find the pristine white ball. So while sin is in the world, it has not destroyed the world.

God created man and woman and gave them the earth to rule over. God designed families to be edifying and loving, but with the entrance of sin into the world (through Eve and the apple), that began to change. God did not intervene, though, because He gave us free will…..

About twelve years ago or so they came out with a new toy that swept the country. At Christmas time this toy was so popular that stores could not keep it in stock. As a result otherwise rational human beings began to punch each other in the face in order to get the toy for their child. All so that they could then purchase it and lovingly present it to their child for Christmas.

One might ask, “What is this toy you speak of and why was it so popular?" It was Furby.

Furby was a six-inch-tall doll that looked similar to a Gremlin and was preprogrammed to say various things based on how you treated it. You knew that you were treating it right when out of its plastic beak it squawked “I love you.”

How cool was that, for a toy to tell of its deep affection for you? It got kids grinning from coast to coast. But the kids soon enough grew apathetic over the toy when they realized that no matter how much they cared for it, and no matter how overjoyed they once were to hear the three little words, that they were that-just three little empty words. The love of a Furby was an artificial love. The words were preprogrammed; it had no will of its own to say them.

As I witnessed the dissatisfaction the kids had for the doll, it reminded me of why God designed the world to have both good and evil in it. We needed a choice. We had to be able to choose to say the words “I love you” to God or our love would not be real.

So while God did give us free will, it was not in His plan that we use it to mistreat others. While the Bible does encourage parents to disciple their children, they are warned to not mistreat them. One example of this is:

Fathers, do not irritate and provoke your children to anger [do not exasperate them to resentment], but rear them [tenderly] in the training and discipline and the counsel and admonition of the Lord. (Ephesians 6:4 AMP)

Why did God feel the need to put such warnings in the Bible? Because He knew that we would need them. And we don't have to look far to see the proof. For there are many examples of such abusive parent’s right in the Bible including:

A drunk, naked father (Genesis 9:20-25),

A father who chooses favorites (Genesis 37:3-4), and

A father who offered to sell and then sold his daughter to a man he despised (1 Samuel 18:25-27)

But the one who took the cake was...

The father who got drunk, then slept with and impregnated his daughters (Genesis 19:30-36)

God wants us to be ever filled with peace and hope, not discouragement and despair. He says,

Fathers, do not embitter your children,

or they will become discouraged.[9]

Growing up in an abusive household can cause grown children to feel so overwhelmed that they often want to escape in places where no one can find them, places like work, food, alcohol, drugs, etc. The list may go on and on, but the pain doesn’t have to.

So many adults do not even realize that they have choices in how they can respond to unpleasant circumstances. As a result, too many people live their lives doing exactly as they saw their parents do, without thinking there might be a better way.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Charley Houston was a cake third-generation cake baker. For as long as he could remember, his family had occupied a small two-story building where they collectively ran Yeast Coast Bakery.

The shop was located on the bottom floor, and the second floor was where the baking was done.

Every day was just about the same as every other day. Until, that is, the day when a reporter was doing a story on local family businesses and came to interview Charley about his. After being given a quick tour of the downstairs, the reporter and Charley headed upstairs.

It wasn’t long before the reporter noticed that the workers often formed a chain to pass food from one floor to the next, even though right next to the stairs was a good-sized dumbwaiter that could easily do the job without all the time it took them to do it by hand.

On top of that, the reporter noticed that Charley himself was often running up and down the stairs carrying miscellaneous orders to the shop below.

His curiosity got the better of him and as Charley headed towards the stairs yet again, carrying a pan of cupcakes, the reporter stopped him, pointed to the dumbwaiter, and asked, “Just out of curiosity, I was wondering if you could tell me why you never ever use that thing.”

Charley looked in the direction that he was pointing and shrugged his shoulders. “It’s broken, has been since my father ran the place.”

“Why don’t you get it fixed?”

Charley shrugged his shoulders, “I guess I never thought about it.”

Later the reporter was introduced to Charley’s father, who now sat behind the counter. “Sir, why have you never fixed the broken dumbwaiter?” The reporter asked.

“Dunno, I never thought about it. It has been broke ever since I was a child.”

“How did it break?”

“Dunno, my father might know, though."

“Is there any way I can speak to him?”

“Ya, I suppose so.”

Charley’s father then picked up the phone, dialed a number and said, “Hey, Pops, there is a reporter here … What… No we didn’t get robbed... No, I am serious, we didn’t get robbed. ...Now, come on, Pops, don’t you think I would tell you? ...Yes…ok…here he is.”

The reporter took the phone...

“Hello, sir, I….what? …No, there wasn’t a robbery… I am just doing a story on locally owned businesses…..Local businesses…Yes, that’s right. Anyway, I had a question... No, I wasn’t going to ask that, Sir… Why, because frankly that is none of my business… What I wanted to know is why you never got that dumbwaiter fixed...dumbwaiter…dumbwaiter! ...Yes, that’s right… What...What? Are you serious? ... Then how come... Oh, I see… Ok, Sir, thanks for your time.”

The reporter hung up the phone and Charley’s father asked, “Well, what did he say?”

The Reporter answered, “It’s not broken.”

“What! How can that be? I mean, I just always assumed…why didn’t he use it, then?”

“He said he was trying to lose the spare tire, the one around his waist”

“Well, I’ll be. You mean, all those years when I was running up and down the stairs, I could have just used the dumbwaiter?”

The reporter just smiled and said, “Sometimes we have more choices than we realize.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Child abuse is, and will continue to be a cycle until the day that all adult survivors of abuse realize that they have options.

Though they may not realize it, everyone who has been abused can choose to live a life of peace. The Bible talks about this in Romans 12:8 (NIV):

If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

While it is not prudent to go into a long discussion about peace, let's just say that for me peace means having a sound mind and control over feelings that may sway me to do the wrong thing. It is not being ruled by emotions, but ruling over them and choosing what is best. That even includes the way I speak to myself.

One of the major effects of someone who has been abused is that they often repeat sentences such as, “I'm stupid, ugly, worthless, etc.,” to themselves over and over, causing them to have a low self-esteems. This will then keep them from living to their full potential.

I know what it is like to be angry and question God. And let me tell you, God is big enough for our questions! He can take what we have to say and more. He would rather have us shout our truths at Him in anger then refuse to speak to Him, because at least when we are shouting, the lines of communication are open.

God wants to set us free from all of our pain. Just look what He says in Jeremiah 30:17:

I will restore your health and heal your wounds, declares the LORD[10].

I believe that God was talking about our mental wounds as well as physical ones in that verse.

I know how scary it can be to think of our heavenly Father as a loving one, but remember, He is not a natural, sin-ridden human father. Instead, He is a supernatural Father who knows just what we need when we need it.

God is so gentle that,

A bruised reed He will not break, and a dimly burning wick He will not quench; He will bring forth justice in truth.[11]

I love that verse. I remember reading that a bruised reed is about the easiest thing in the world to break. If you just brush against it while walking past, it will be broken in two.

At times I am sure we have all felt like that bruised reed. We may think, if one more thing happens to me, I will be done for. It is at those times when I believe God says back to us, “I know you have been hurt and I feel your pain, but I have never left you, even in your darkest hour. I brought you through. Yes, it was rough. Yes, it was not fair. But I was with you through it all, as I am with you now”.

God is in our corner! He is the same yesterday, today, and forever. He is good all the time and will never mistreat us. It is simply is not in His nature to do so.

While often overlooked by adults, children have always been precious to God. This is exemplified in the Bible story where the children wanted to talk to Jesus but His disciple blocked their way until …

Jesus called them to him, saying, "Let the children come to me, and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God"[12]

No matter where we came from or what has happened to us, God passionately loves us and wants to bring us into wholeness.

To know God as Father means to have a healer who will calm the storms that rage within. It means to have a father who will help you to “be strong, courageous, and firm; [and] be not in terror … for it is the Lord your God who goes with you; He will not fail you or forsake you.”[13] To know God as Father means to know what it is like to have a father who is “gracious and merciful, slow to anger, [and] abundant in kindness.”[14] And it means being able to trust a Father who will never hurt you or let you down. You can trust God! He is with you now.

Some are Depressed

She studies herself in the mirror. “Not too bad,” she thinks, as she moves over to the corner to put on the final piece of her costume.

She can’t believe it. Opening night is finally here! This is the happiest that she’s been in a long while. She feels so good it almost doesn’t matter to her that he hadn’t come….almost

She had always been a daddy’s girl, and they used to have so much fun.

There were the times when he surprised her by picking her up from school early and taking her to a Mariners game. She was seven then, and though she never cared much for baseball, she did love going to those games because it meant sitting next to and watching her father as he watched the players. She loved how his eyes lit up when he saw his team take the field for the first time, or how he sat anxiously on the edge of his seat every time Griffey went up to bat, or high fived her when he hit a home run. That, to her, was a good time.

Another memory (her favorite actually) was the time they went to Disneyland. She remembered it was late in the day and the parade was about to start. She was tired and cranky and just about to throw a major hissy fit when, instead of yelling at her or ignoring her as other fathers might be prone to do, he scooped her up and put her on his shoulders, where she stayed until last float passed by. It was her favorite memory because nothing could ever quite compare to sitting atop the shoulders of her hero.

“Five minutes till curtain.”

She quickly hurried to the mirror to touch up her makeup. “There, perfect.” It was then that she saw the photo of her and her father which had been taken when she was eleven.

That day they, she and her father, had gone to yet another Mariners game. She remembered they won, five to three. Afterward they went out for ice cream to celebrate. As they were sitting there across the booth from each other, each enjoy enjoying a dish of the house special, when her friend came in with his parents and a his old junky camera. Though the quality wasn’t great, there no mistaking the joy emanating from her father's face as he looked at her from across the table.

That was the last time she was to see that look, because when they returned home that day, they found the house emptied of all her mother’s belongings, with a note explaining all the whys and wherefores without really saying anything at all.

That was the worst day of her life. Not because she missed her mother; they were never really that close. No, it was because when her mother left she took a piece of her father’s spirit that he was never able to recover. That, coupled with a job loss and her grandparents passing, changed her bright, happy-go-lucky father into a man she almost didn’t recognize.

So now, instead of attending Mariner games or taking trips to magical places, he sits alone in his room.

And that is why tonight, instead of being front and center, watching his daughter shine, he chooses to stay in his favorite robe and watch reruns of a long-forgotten family whose biggest problem is finding out who broke the vase.

“Curtain.”

She drops the photo and scrambles out the door, telling herself it doesn’t matter, when the reality is that she feels as if it is she that doesn't matter.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When a parent is depressed, it changes the whole atmosphere in the home. It is like a weight hanging over everyone and everything. If you are unaware of what depression is, it often makes the weight of it feel unbearable. So education is the first step to bring some relief.

The four major types of depression:

Major Depression – This type can be brought on by many things, including the death of a family member, divorce, or even job loss.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tricia could see it coming. Her husband was out of work again. His seasonal job had ended, and there was no more work in site. Instead of being productive and accomplishing things around the house, Travis spent all his free time lying in bed, sleeping, or watching TV.

About a week after it began, Tricia came home from work, looked at the messy house, saw her husband sleeping on the couch, and, irritated, nudged him awake.

He rubbed his eyes and tried to focus on her as she spoke, “Look, honey, I know you are feeling bad right now, but since you are home you need to do something around the house.”

He grunted his reply.

Getting frustrated, she said, “And what about the kids? I thought you were going to take them to the park, but they called me at work and told me you were asleep all day.”

Again he grunted.

That did it. Extremely frustrated, she yelled, “You said that you were not going to act like this, this time! So you lost your job! Big deal! We all go through it. Get up, dust yourself off, and do something.”

“Like what?”

“I have a list of things around here you can do.”

“I’m not a cleaner.”

“But you are unemployed and I am working. And I need your help, so snap out of it!”

Travis just looked at her, rolled over and fell back asleep.

What Tricia didn’t realize is that Travis did not have the capacity to “just snap out of it.” Major depression is an illness that needs treatment, it is not just a frame of mind.

Within an entire lifetime, major depression will affect 5%-12% of men. It typically lasts for six months at a time and is commonly a reoccurring disorder.

Dysthymic Disorder - This type of depression lasts from two years to a lifetime.

Dysthymic disorder appears to affect approximately 6 % of men.

Fathers with this type of depression might be classified as a type of "Eeyore."

For those who don’t know, Eeyore is the gloomy donkey from the Winnie the Pooh children's book series. He has a habit of walking with his head hanging low, saying things like “Poor me” and “Oh bother." He tends to walks slowly, and worries about everything...

Just like Eeyore, those with this condition tend to be withdrawn, sluggish, and irritable. They generally feel like they were made to experience a life of gloom.

Seasonal affective disorder (SAD) ~ this disorder usually occurs in about 5 % of adults and usually lasts during the seasons of fall and winter.

Children with a father who has suffered from this condition would probably not have realized that he was suffering. They most likely would have thought he just didn’t like the cold weather, the holidays, crowded stores, or slick roads. But in reality “some experts believe the increased darkness disrupts the brain chemicals that affect mood, such as melatonin and serotonin, and others believe that the reduced sunlight causes vitamin D deficiencies, which can translate to depressive feelings.”[15]

I saw firsthand the effects of this disorder while working on a writing project with a friend. We had a deadline to meet, so we got together early, determining to barrel through and finish it.

Yet no matter what we did, we just couldn’t seem to get any words on paper. So after a while we began to discuss the possible reasons our usually flow of words weren’t coming.

“Did you get enough sleep?” my friend asked.

“Yep.” came my reply.

“Well what about food? Are you hungry?”

“Ate breakfast before you got here.”

“Me too. Cheetos. Are you still exercising?”

“Yep, I'm still doing a few miles on the treadmill in the morning.”

“And I still am watching them exercise on TV.”

“So then, what is our problem?”

"Beats me."

We sat there a moment pondering our dilemma, when my daughter came in and asked, "Why are you guys sitting in the dark?" She reached across my desk and opened the blinds, letting the sunlight stream in.

Instantaneously we felt more alive. We gave each other a big grin and a high-five and quickly finished our project.

Manic Depression is the last of the depression types.

Manic depression (also known as bipolar disorder) and affects about 1% of the adult population in the US.

Fathers with this type go from having very high, energetic moods, where they make irrational decisions, to very low, depressive moods, where they feel hopeless. I once read an article in which a young girl talked about how having a manically depressed father made her feel. What I remember the most about that article is that she talked about how her life was like a roller coaster, depending on the mood he was in.

I am not sure if she mentioned it, but I can only imagine that having such a father would make it hard for one to feel safe growing up, because she would never be able to predict the mood he was going to be in.

When he was in a manic state, she might be afraid that her father would say or do something to embarrass her, making her unwilling to invite friends over or to go out for things like the lead in the school play, or sports.

On the flip side when he was in a depressive state, I would imagine that she, like any child, would be afraid to leave him alone for fear that he might harm himself. And that fear would not be groundless, because between 10 and 15 percent of people with this disorder do commit suicide (far more attempt it, but do not succeed).

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Growing up with a depressed father, may cause the grown child to become self-destructive (in order to get their father’s attention) or angry because of growing up virtually alone. It can also negatively affect how someone sees themselves, which could lead to depression unless he/she learns to change the way he/she thinks.

What we need to remember is that a father is depressed for reasons that are solely his own. Whether brought on by a medical reasons or by life in general, depression is not caused because child misbehaved or wasn't good enough.

Depression is nothing new. In fact it has been around since the beginning of mankind.

The Bible is full of many examples of those suffering from depression. One such person is a man named Elijah.

Elijah was quite the man's man. He was a prophet of God who not only did little things like out run a horse, command the weather, or live with a widow for two years during a famine and supernaturally provide all her food. But if that weren't enough, the guy raised the widow's son from the dead and called down fire from heaven.

Not to be confused with Moses, Elijah also parted the water (as recorded in 2 Kings 2:8).

Pretty impressive, huh? And that is only a portion of what he did.

Yes, if anyone had reason to feel good about themselves, it was Elijah.

In fact, in 1 King 18, Elijah goes before a King, challenges him and win! Pretty impressive as not too many of us can say we have done that!

But interestingly enough, we find that although he is conquering in one chapter, in the very next chapter we find him running for his life, scared, and depressed. The Bible records the following:

He was afraid, and he arose and ran for his life and came to Beersheba, which belongs to Judah, and left his servant there. But he himself went a day's journey into the wilderness and came and sat down under a broom tree. And he asked that he might die, saying, “It is enough; now, O Lord, take away my life, for I am no better than my fathers.” And he lay down and slept under a broom tree. And behold, an angel touched him and said to him, “Arise and eat.” (1 King 19: 3-5)

In other words, Elijah went from conquering the world one day to wanting to die the next.

Depression can hit out of the blue. It can leave us feeling, like Elijah, that we are alone and scared, hoping to die.

The cool thing about walking with God is that He will not leave us in such a state. The next thing you know there was an angel waking Elijah up, saying:

"Arise and eat." And he looked, and behold, there was at his head a cake baked on hot stones and a jar of water. And he ate and drank and lay down again. And the angel of the Lord came again a second time and touched him and said, “Arise and eat, for the journey is too great for you.” (1 Kings 19:5-7)

God had sent an angel to minister to Elijah.

If God had not done so we might of found that Elijah (who had lost the will to eat, and who wanted nothing but to sleep) would of stayed in his depressed state until the day he died.

When our fathers are depressed, it is really easy to feel anger towards them, but the anger is useless because depression is not something anyone wishes for.

God Himself has compassion on those who are depressed, and we should do the same. Second Corinthians 7:6 says that God "comforts the downcast." That means anyone. A mom, a dad, your second cousin's best friend's boyfriend's little sister's ballet teacher's dog's groomer! Anyone! Even you! So if you are feeling down, look up for comfort!

To know God as Father is to have a Father that “is the same yesterday and today and forever” (Hebrews 13:18). A Father who will always be there for you and is waiting for you to reach up to Him so that he can draw you up “from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog” (Psalm 40:2) and place securely on His shoulders so that you are able to enjoy life’s parade.

Some are Wimpy

Kenny couldn’t believe it. It was finally happening. He and his dad were finally going to go on that elusive camping trip.

He had packed with a light heart, yet, he tried not to worry because his father had promised that this time nothing was going to stop them.

This time it was just him and his Dad setting out on the adventure of a lifetime.

“Dad, do you think we will see bats?”

“Sorry son, I don’t think there are any bats up there.”

“What about mountain lions? Do you think we’ll see any mountain lions?”

His father looked as if he was going to say no, but then tousled his son’s hair and said, “We’ll never know until we get there.”

“I hope we get to see a baby bear up close.”

“I don’t know about that, son. Where a baby is, an upset mother is soon to follow.”

“I guess I don’t need to see any stupid ole baby bear, then,” Kenny said, not wanting to mess with a mother bear, or any mother, for that matter.

“I think it’s time to hit the road.” His father said matter-of-factly.

“Yes, sir,” Kenny replied as he grabbed his backpack.

And then, as if right on cue, she woke up.

She came out, bleary-eyed as ever, took one look at the bags, went over to Kenny's father, and, with all the puppy-faced sadness she could muster, asked “You’re not going on the trip today, are you?”

Kenny watched his father’s face darken. “Yes, you know we are going today. We’ve been planning this trip for months.”

“Well, I know that, but I had no idea it was today.”

“But I told you last night.”

“Well, I was tired, I must not have heard correctly.”

“But you said to have a good time and that you would hold down the fort,” Kenny chipped in.

“Well, it doesn’t matter. The thing is, I just got a call from my mom and she is upset and needs me, so I’m going.”

“But she lives two states away.”

“It doesn’t matter. She needs me and I’m going, so you have to stay home with the little ones.”

Kenny looked at his father, expecting him to say, “Forget you, we’re going. I promised my son a camping trip, and nothing will stop us, least of all you.”

But, as usual, he said nothing except “I’m sorry, son. Maybe next time.”

“Oh well,” Kenny sighed, “I guess I’ll go unpack. Stupid me. I shouldn’t have packed in the first place. I knew I wasn’t going. It's just like my friends say...Mom's the boss in this family.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kenny is not alone in his disappointment. Far too often fathers like Kenny's, though their intentions are good, constantly disappoint their children because they allow their wife's to stop them from doing what they know is right.

Wimpy fathers are the type of father most often made fun of in situation comedies. One very popular show depicts a guy who tries to make wise decisions concerning his family, but who is constantly stopped and “put in his place” by the one who is really in charge, his wife. And if the audience begins to wonder why he would put up with such a wife, they are given the answer in the form of his mother, who is even more domineering and aggressive then his wife is.

While this fictional family may make people laugh, in real life families like these are more painful to watch than anything else. When God designed the family, He created it in just the right way so that there would be harmony and peace in the home. God showed us a picture of what marriage should be like in Ephesians 5:33 (AMP):

However, let each man of you [without exception] love his wife as [being in a sense] his very own self; and let the wife see that she respects and reverences her husband [that she notices him, regards him, honors him, prefers him, venerates, and esteems him; and that she defers to him, praises him, and loves and admires him exceedingly].

When I look at the people I know who have really successful marriages, the ones where the people actually enjoy being around each other, they are the people who are doing it Gods way.

Ever since the 1920s woman have been told that in order to be a real women, you must break off the chains that bind you. In order to be really happy you had to be in charge. As a result the divorce rate in America in 1994 was six times higher than that of 1920.

I grew up in the seventies and I remember singing along to “I am woman, hear me roar,” and watching commercials where women told the men to “get it themselves!"

“Woman power” at all costs was in full rage back then, but unfortunately the costs was to be paid by their children, who grew up learning that to be a strong man or be loved by one was a bad thing.

Now do not misunderstand. I am for all people. I am for no one being mistreated (man or woman), yet in discussing fathers I would be remise if I ignored this type of father.

Usually wimpy men were raised in an environment where their mom was dominate and got her way through bullying.

When children are young their mother is usually the center of their universe, so if their mom was controlling and angry and their father sat by and did nothing about it, they grew up with a lot of fear and confusion as a result. This often leads to their wanting to please their mom at all costs.

In today’s world we have flipped this idea of what it is be strong, upside down. We have decided it is every man and woman for themselves, and as a result we have no peace in the home and parents that are burnt out and have trouble coping with what life throws at them.

Men were designed to be strong so that they would have the strength to carry their family’s burdens to God. When fathers are wimpy, it may cause their children to feel they have nothing to lean on and that there is no safe port in the storm. As a result, their kids tend to view God as a sort of do-nothing, king-in-name-only type God. But that “God conclusion” couldn’t be further from the truth.

The Bible speaks often of God's might, such as how with His mighty arm victories are won, how He is all-powerful (Psalm 118:16), how He is our powerful weapon (Psalm 18:2), that His hand is powerful (Joshua 4:24), that we are sons and daughters of the all-powerful God (2Corinthians 6:18).

However, while God is all-powerful men are not. And in today's culture we have often confused being weak physically with being a wimp. The most physically weak can be the strongest, and even the strongest of men can be the wimpiest.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Take, for example, the Story of Samson. His was about to take a heathen wife in order to anger an enemy. After their engagement party (which made her his wife in those days), she betrayed Samson by goading him into telling her information, which she in turn gave to her people (The philistines). Samson became very angry at her.

She then rejected him and was given in marriage to his best friend.

Angry, he went out and caught 300 foxes, tied them together two by two, set them on fire, and sent them to burn down the fields of the Philistines.

Imagine how physically strong a person must have been to tie all those tails together, let alone capture all the foxes!

That was just the start of the display of his power, though. Later, when he was caught by the Philistines, they tied his hands with rope, but Samson (after being strengthened by the Lord) broke free of the ropes and killed a thousand men with the jawbone of a donkey!

If we were to fast-forward a little we would see that Samson had been a judge (ruler) over Israel for twenty years, keeping the Philistines at bay, when he fell head over heels for a beautiful woman. (What a shock!)

Wanting to beat Sampson his enemies hatched an evil plan. They went to the woman Samson loved and promised her a very large fortune if she would get Samson to tell her where he got his strength.

Just like Samson’s first love, Delilah used what she could to get the info....

She said to him, “How can you say, ‘I love you,’ when your heart is not with me? You have mocked me these three times, and you have not told me where your great strength lies.” (Judges 16:15)

Right then and there Samson should have remembered his past, got a backbone, and booted her out, but like the real wimp that he was, he caved in.

When she pressed him hard with her words day after day, and urged him, his soul was vexed to death. And he told her all his heart. (Judges 16:16-17).

Growing up with a wimpy father can cause a chasm between father and child that might be too great to bridge if it were not for the healing restoration of Gods power.

The following true story, is an example of such healing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My mom loved us the best that she knew how to love us, but unfortunately her way was violence and manipulation. I had four brothers and two sisters, and violence was the only way that she felt she could control us-just as she had been controlled when she was younger.

My father was a man of few words. I often thought it was due to his being traumatized as a young child, when during the Depression he and his siblings ended up living in an orphanage for a period of time. As a result he grew up a very quiet and reserved man.

My parents met in their twenties and quickly married. My mother took control from the start. She was very smart and was determined that she would never again let a man have control over her.

As their family grew in number, so did the problems.

Growing up I remember that my mom set the rules in the house. If we ever wanted to do anything, we would ask our dad and he would always say, "Go ask your mother."

Every time my father would speak, my mother would say, "Shut up you ol' fool," and he did.

This caused me to have no respect for him. He knew I didn't, and as a result our relationship was so bad that he refuse to give me away at my wedding.

Years later I began attending church. Even though I was attending church, I still had no respect for him, because I felt that he wasn't going to be a father who was ever going to be there for me.

Yet as I got to really know my heavenly Father, the changes that have occurred inside me have allowed me to connect with my earthly father in a way I would never have thought possible.

It has been a number of years since Mom died, and I am just now getting to know my dad. He is finally opening up and is telling us all the things that he would never speak out loud before. He even tells me he loves me.

To know God as Father means to have a Father who is strong inside and out. To know God as Father is to have a Father who never grows weary (Isaiah 40:31) and who will “bind up the injured, and... will strengthen the weak” (Ezekiel 34:16). To know God as Father means to have a Father with a back so strong that He is able to carry us wherever we need to go.

Some Never Stop Pressuring

“Please spell conglomerate.”

One of my last opponents steps up to the podium. She looks nervous. “Good,” I think.

I watch as she nervously asks, “Could you use that in a sentence?” then later, ”Could I have the definition please?”

“Ah, she’s on the ropes now,” I think. “And after she is eliminated, there will be just one more obstacle between me and all that I have worked so hard for.”

The bell rings, signifying her elimination. I cheer quietly inside as I watch my last opponent walk up to the podium.

“Spell obnoxious.”

“No problem,” he says confidently.

I hear snickering in the audience. My throat tightens.

“Obnoxious. O.B.N.O.X.I.O.U.S. Obnoxious.”

“Correct.”

He bows and waves me toward the podium. I stand up and move slowly, knowing that though hundreds of eyes are on me there is only one pair that I can feel burning a hole in my brain.

They are the eyes of the one who caused me to enter this competition in the first place. The eyes of the one who kept me up late, drilling me until every last word was spelled to his satisfaction. The eyes of one who has spent my entire childhood telling others how proud he is of me, yet in private telling me to work harder and think smarter because there is always going to be someone better and my best is not good enough.

They are eyes of my father.

“Please spell macabre.”

“Can I have the definition please?”

“Gruesome; pertaining to death.”

I wring my hands. “Can I have it in a sentence please?”

I see his eyes. I slowly say macabre and then begin to spell. “M.A.C.C.” His face looks as though he has been hurt. I begin again. “M.A.C-” he smiles- “A.B.R.” His smiling face takes the pressure off and I know I have it in the bag, “A. Macabre,” I say triumphantly. The bell rings.

I am told the correct spelling by the announcer but cannot hear it due to my opponent’s glee at being the winner.

Head low, I exit the stage. I have failed him, and I know it. My stomach knots as I walk over to him.

“Come on, let’s go,” he says in a gruff and dispassionate tone.

“I’m sorry,” I say, tears stinging my eyes.

He walks on and I follow behind, deflated and spent.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What the child's father in the story above did not seem to get was that his children need love more that she need guidance.

Because while guidance is important, it is like the Bible says:

If I give everything I own to the poor and even go to the stake to be burned as a martyr, but I don't love, I've gotten nowhere. So, no matter what I say, what I believe, and what I do, I'm bankrupt without love. (1 Corinthians 13:3-7 MSG)

In the best of worlds, childhood should be a time when one is free to explore and grow at a rate the child is comfortable with. But in the real world it is often thought of by parents as a time to prepare for future success.

For example, instead of waiting for three-year-old little Sally to get sick of wearing diapers and say, “Hey, parental units get me to a potty I don’t want to be wet anymore,” we have little Sally’s parents saying, “Look, Sally, you want to be like the other kids, don’t you? Now I know you are only two, but you have to think of your future. CEOs don’t wear diapers! So get on that potty and make us proud!”

Okay, I may have exaggerated a little, but not by much. As a former child-care worker I have witnessed scenes like this many times. Of course, the words are different, but the meaning is the same.

And daycare isn't the only place. Pushy fathers are everywhere. Once I even witnessed a father throwing his eight-year-old son in the pool over and over and over to "prepare" him for a swim meet. How that was supposed to prepare him I have no idea.

I think that it's this in a fast-paced, rat-race society, we live in. It is driving parents to expect more and more from their kids. You don't have to look far to see it.

The average TV viewer has seen at least one of the many TV shows that document the lives of pageant families. It seems insane to me home much of the child's day is spent rehearsing and rehearsing. Even when they beg to stop. Fathers are often a big a participant as the mothers.

When a six-year-old says that looking in a mirror scares her (when she is dressed up in pageant garb) because she doesn't recognize herself, you know that a pushy parent has gone to far.

Of course, the pageant world is not the only competitive area where parents push their children. It seems there is not one area where it does not happen.

Driven fathers can want so much for their children that they can sometimes go too far.

Such as when a father of a tennis player who so wanted his child to win, that he drugged the child's opponents, thinking they would be off their game.

This father was so driven to have his son win that he failed to see the real risk involver in his actions.

The story turned tragic when one of the opponents (a twenty-five-year-old school teacher) pulled out of the match, got in his car to drive home, and fell asleep at the wheel. He died and the father was arrested...all for the sake of winning.

Being a pushy parent is not just limited to our modern world.

Believe it or not, even in the time when Jesus walked the earth, there were such parents. Matthew 20:20-22 (MSG) records one such story.

The mother of the Zebedee brothers came with her two sons and knelt before Jesus with a request.

"What do you want?" Jesus asked.

She said, "Give your word that these two sons of mine will be awarded the highest places of honor in your kingdom, one at your right hand, one at your left hand."

Imagine the nerve it would take to ask God Himself to give your kids top billing over and above His other apostles!

Jesus responded, "You have no idea what you're asking." And he said to James and John, "Are you capable of drinking the cup that I'm about to drink?"

They said, "Sure, why not?"

You know, I wonder if they answered this way partly because they were a little thick-in-the-head and partly because they just wanted to please their mom.

Yet, as Jesus said, they had no idea the suffering those who took those seats would endure.

But they were about to find out, because while they were not promised the seats, Jesus did let them know suffering was in their future.

As a side note, when the two Zebedee brothers were recruited with the other ten disciples, they were met with anger and disgust. That is something that children of pushy parents sometimes have to deal with from their competitors.

Other side effect of pushy parenting includes sever stomach pains (as the child internalizes his or her feelings) or violent acting-out. The child might do something like destroy their toys or even begin to bully their siblings or friends out of sheer frustration.

Being raised with a pushy father can cause a person to grow up feeling as if they will never measure up. As a result, many pressured children become perfectionists who either believe that they can't do anything perfectly so they quite doing anything at all, or they overwork themselves, hoping to gain their fathers approval.

Whatever the case, it is important to note a few things here.

One, pushy fathers often do not realize the harm they are doing to their children. Their aggressiveness is most likely seen by them as a small nudge to get their children aligned for success. Blaming them is really a waste of our time, and it keeps us from connecting with them as an adult.

And two, no matter what obstacles our past has set up for us, we can overcome them!

Just because we are a perfectionist now does not mean we have to continue to be so. And just because we are carrying around wounds from as few as two or as many as fifty years ago does not mean we have to keep carrying them around.

God will help us if we let Him.

The great thing about having God as our Father is that He will allow us to become all that we were created to be and will help us to get there at our own pace - no pressure involved.

To know God as Father means to always have someone one on our side who will cheer for us when we are doing well and will cheer us on when we are falling behind. But more importantly, we will be able to feel and understand, as all God’s children should, "have strength to  comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and  height and depth, and to know the love of Christ  that surpasses knowledge, that  you may be filled with all  the fullness of God" (Ephesians 3: 18-19).

God is for us and He lets us know that our relationship with Him never has to do with anything we can accomplish, but only with who we are-His beloved child.

Some are Greedy

THE MOST FRUGAL OF MEN

A man who was considered the most frugal of all the dwellers in a certain kingdom heard of another man who was the most frugal in the whole world. He said to his son thereupon: "We, indeed, live upon little, but if we were more frugal still, we might live upon nothing at all. It will be well worth while for us to get instructions in economy from the Most Frugal of Men." The son agreed, and the two decided that the son should go and inquire whether the master in economic science would take pupils. An exchange of presents being a necessary preliminary to closer intercourse, the father told the son to take the smallest of coins, one farthing, and to buy a sheet of paper of the cheapest sort. The boy, by bargaining, got two sheets of paper for the farthing. The father put away one sheet, cut the other sheet in halves, and on one half drew a picture of a pig's head. This he put into a large covered basket, as if it were the thing which it represented--the usual gift sent in token of great respect. The son took the basket, and after a long journey reached the abode of the most frugal man in the world.

The master of the house was absent, but his son received the traveler, learned his errand, and accepted the offering. Having taken from the basket the picture of the pig's head, he said courteously to his visitor: "I am sorry that we have nothing in the house that is worthy to take the place of the pig's head in your basket. I will, however, signify our friendly reception of it by putting in four oranges for you to take home with you."

Thereupon the young man, without having any oranges at hand, made the motions necessary for putting the fruit into the basket. The son of the most frugal man in the kingdom then took the basket and went to his father to tell of thrift surpassing his own.

When the most frugal man in the world returned home, his son told him that a visitor had been there, having come from a great distance to take lessons in economy. The father inquired what offering he brought as an introduction, and the son showed the small outline of the pig's head on thin brown paper. The father looked at it, and then asked his son what he had sent as a return present. The son told him he had merely made the motions necessary for transferring four oranges, and showed how he had clasped the imaginary fruit and deposited it in the visitor's basket. The father immediately flew into a terrible rage and boxed the boy's ears, exclaiming: "You extravagant wretch! With your fingers thus far apart you appeared to give him large oranges. Why didn't you measure out small ones?”[16]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

While this story may be some obscure fairytale from years ago, greed is all too real for the many children with a father who doesn’t have all his oranges in one basket when it comes to parenting. Imagine what the boy felt. Here he was, sure his father would approve of his craftiness, and yet it wasn’t enough; he wasn’t enough.

The message “you do not matter to me as much as money,” is one heard in far too many homes across this country. And while senders may not always be aware that they are sending it, the receivers get the message loud and clear.

Jesus said in Matthew 6:21, "For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also" (NIV). It stands to reason that if money is a person’s main focus, their child may not be in their view.

God knew money would be a problem; that’s why He tells us in 1 Timothy 6:10 that "the love of money is the root of all evils." Notice that God didn’t say that money itself is the root of all evil but that the love of it is. That is because God knows that greed is not a money issue but a heart issue.

Speaking of heart, the following true story broke mine.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Once upon a time in a city called Emerald lived a young woman we shall call Rachel. Rachel was and still is the daughter of a father who is very, shall we say, "tight in the wallet."

One day her father started feeling a little convicted about never once taking Rachel out, so he called her up and promised to take her to dinner the next evening.

To say that she was thrilled would be an understatement. She was also incredibly shocked by the prospect that he would finally spend his precious money on her. Her heart raced with anticipation all the next day, and as his car pulled to a stop in front of her home, she almost fainted with excitement.

Imagine her dismay when she realized that instead of some nice restaurant like Chez Zee, he pulled into the parking lot of Chez Mickey D (otherwise known as McDonald's).

Ever the optimist, she pulled her mouth up off the floor and decided that maybe this was just his way of taking baby steps.

She thought, at least he is paying something. Unfortunately though, when it came time to pay for the meal, her father, looking a bit pale at the thought of parting with his cash, said he couldn’t find his wallet and so Rachel, his daughter, paid the bill, just as she had been doing her whole life. Is it any wonder that Rachel has been in one abusive relationship after another, trying get that love that was denied her growing up?

Rachel grew up believing that she just wasn't good enough to be loved by her father, but she was wrong.

Now he may call himself thrifty, but make no mistake about it, anyone who would rather hold their wallet tightly instead of their children's heart is flat-out greedy. Any father who values gain over his children has a problem with greed. This problem is not a new one, either.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

All the way back in biblical times, there lived a man named Achan (which means "troublemaker"). Joshua 7:24 says that he had sons and daughters (though it does not name them), so we know he is a father.

Achan was with Joshua when he marched around Jericho for seven days. God had commanded the eight thousand men who were going to conquer Jericho not to take anything valuable because the spoils belonged to God. But Achan's greed got the better of him.

Think about that. He was a man who was one generation removed from that whole escaping-being-a-slave-by-walking-across-the-red-sea-which-Moses-parted generation.

His parents most likely saw Moses come down the mountain carrying the Ten Commandments. This guy knew who God was. He had seen Him work. So when God said not to touch the spoils because they belong to Him, Achan should have listened.

But Achan desired wealth more than his relationship with God, or even his relationship with his children, so he ignored the warning and stole many expensive things, hiding them among his other possessions.

Meanwhile, after defeating Jericho, the Israelites were overjoyed and maybe even a little over confident. When the opportunity came for them to conquer another piece of the Promised Land, Joshua, the leader of the Israelites, did not ask God first but sent men out thinking it would be a piece of cake. When men were killed, Joshua was overcome with grief. He asked the Lord why and God told him with Achan had done. So Joshua sent for Achan...

Then Joshua said to Achan, “My son, give glory to the Lord God of Israel and give praise to him. And tell me now what you have done; do not hide it from me.”

And Achan answered Joshua, “Truly  I have sinned against the Lord God of Israel, and this is what I did: when I saw among the spoil a beautiful cloak from Shinar, and 200 shekels of silver, and a bar of gold weighing 50 shekels,  then I coveted them and took them. And see, they are hidden in the earth inside my tent, with the silver underneath.”

And Joshua said, “Why did you bring trouble on us? The Lord brings trouble on you today.” And all Israel stoned him with stones.  They burned them with fire and stoned them with stones. And they raised over him a great heap of stones that remains to this day. Then the Lord turned from his burning anger. Therefore, to this day the name of that place is called the Valley of Achor. [17]

Wow! This was pretty intense punishment!

It was also great example to the Israelites and to us today. Achan's family was literally destroyed because of his greed.

Achan thought, “Easy money no big deal!’

That is just like what so many fathers today think before they rob or steal and end up in jail with a good chance of never seeing their children again.

USA Today reports that "more than 1.7 million children across the USA have a parent in U.S. prisons...The number of children with a father in prison grew by 77% from 1991 through mid-2007." This is not surprising when we look at the shape the world is in today.

Even though a father may have chosen “stuff” before his child, even though he may have broken their heart, it does not have to remain broken. Today is a new day, and God is a big God. He cares about us like no earthly father ever could.

John 3:16 reminds us that it is because of God’s deep love for us that He sent Jesus to us.

God bought us at great cost, as 1 Corinthians 6:20 says, and we need to remember that that price was greater than any price ever paid.

That price was Jesus.

For God so loved the world,

that He gave

his only begotten Son, that

whosoever

believeth in him should not perish,

but have everlasting life.[18]

We need to pay special attention to that word whosoever.

Why? Because “whosoever” means all of us - yep, every single one of us. There is not one of us that is left out of this wonderful deal! So the cool thing is that we need just to give our lives to Jesus and we will be a “whosoever.”

I know it may be hard for some to believe, so I offer up the following. Imagine there was a really nice guy who moved to a new town and was clueless about its laws and customs. One day, this guy was going to the store when he saw this really beautiful flower. It was the prettiest one that he ever seen. He couldn’t resist. He picked it.

The next thing he knew, the police arrived and informed him that that flower was the sacred spring day flower. He informed the newcomer that the town had a custom in which, on the first day of spring, they gather around the flower and sang.

He also informs the guy that there will be a 100,000 dollar fine for picking the flower, and that he will be locked up in jail until he paid it.

The newcomer was just about to freak out when a complete stranger came up and said, “I will pay your fine for you.”

Jesus wants to do the same for us. Why? Because we are worth everything to God

To know God as Father means to know that you are valued highly, about all else. God paid the ultimate price in that “While we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8). To know God as Father means knowing that nothing will separate you from the love of your Father and that you are worth it all.

Some are pretty good

As he was packing up his father's belongings, he paused, looking round at the empty room and then looked toward the wall which contained the last items to be packed, all the awards that his father had received over his lifetime. He couldn't believe how quickly the time had gone, how very blessed he had been growing up.

He had a father who not only worked hard to provide a living but who also worked hard at providing a great life for his family. His father made sure that he would be there for all functions he participated in (weather it was a game, a conference, a boy scout meeting, anything), and he made sure that once a year, that he was in and he made sure that once a year, like clockwork, the family took a road trip.

His father's marriage to his mother had been a strong one, and he learned much from watching them live life together.

Toward the end, his father may have been eighty-five, and looking somewhat frail, but to his son he was a tower, a rock.

The son began wrapping the awards in newspaper and felt his emotions rise, yet knowing he had a job to do, he pushed them down and pressed on quickly.

However, as he reached for the last award that hung on the wall, he could no longer fight back the tears, for in his hands lay the only award he himself had ever given his father,

It was a clay disk crafted by his seven-year-old hands. The disk was not much to look at, but it was the simple words carved into it that choked him up. The words conveyed who his father was to him,

As he lovingly traced the carved letters with his forty-year-old fingers, he smiled and slipped the plaque in his jacket pocket, looked up, and said, "Dad I think I have just the place for this."

Later he walked into his home, grabbed a hammer and a couple of nails, and went over to a special place on the wall. He hammered two nails into the wall before hanging the plaque on one of them.

Hearing the hammering, his son came in to the room to see what he was doing. Smiling, he said, "Wow cool matching plaques," as he looked at the wall where his father had just hug the "World’s Greatest Dad!" plaque right next to the one his own son had made for him.

A puzzled look formed on his son’s eight-year-old face and he asked, "What is the third nail for?"

The man smiled a deeply satisfying smile, then looked at his son and said, "That one, my dear child, is waiting to hang the plague that your child will one day make for you."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Some of us are blessed from birth with fathers who just get it. They get that there are supposed to be there for their children and spend time with them. They get that they are never supposed to lay a hand on their child unless it is done out of a pure love. They know enough to get help when overwhelmed. They are dependable, a strong tower. They get that they are supposed to cheer for their child out of excitement and love, not out of anger and pride. And they always value their family above any earthly thing.

They are passing on a Legacy of love. Jesus Himself said, "As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love" (John 15:9 NIV).

Just as Jesus passed on to us the love He received from His Father, any good father does the same. While no father is perfect a healthy father is typically demonstrates the following characteristics:

Friendliness

Jesus said: No longer do I call you servants, for the servant   does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you[19]

Some fathers spend so much time making a living that they forget to make a life. That is why it is so nice to see a father coaching his son's baseball team, taking his kids to the store for groceries, or just gently pushing them on a swing.

While parents are not called to be their Child's best friends, they are called to be friendly, approachable, and willing to be kind to their child even when they themselves have had a bad day. When a father is friendly toward his child, he is not only showing that he can be trusted, but that “The Father” can be trusted.

Comfort

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.[20]

My Pastor once spoke of a time when his heart was broken by a first love. He was sixteen at the time and it devastated him. He lay in a heap crying on his bed. Without a word his father picked him up and just held him.

That is a very clear picture of how God comforts us. God does not leave us alone in our sadness and despair, just as any good father would not.

In all areas in life there are situations that can cause us to suffer (family, work, finances, etc.), but though we may experience pain and despair, God (just like any good father) will be with us in our pain.

Encouragement

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. [21]

God designed us just the way He wanted us to be. Good fathers know that their job is to encourage their child to be the best version of themselves that they can be.

This world is so negative, but good fathers know that they need to choose words that build up their child and stay away from words that will tear them down.

Authoritative

Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.[22]

When we think of someone in authority, we often think of someone harsh or hard, when in reality God set people in roles of authority so that they would guide and lead us in the right direction.

Unfortunately, sometimes that guiding may require a person in authority to have to discipline us, but if it is done the right way, God's way, it will bring nothing but positive results.

A good father instills a healthy amount of respect and in his children so that they know not to cross certain lines and so their house won't be in constant chaos.

Jesus knew the importance of the father’s unconditional love. He talked of this kind of love in Luke 15:11-32. It is the story of a father who deeply loves his children and even though he is in authority, he does not hesitate to show his kindness, comfort, and encouragement. The story that Jesus told was the story of the Prodigal son.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There once was a man who had two sons. The older one was a hard worker who didn't ask for much. The younger wanted a carefree happy-go-lucky life. So he went to his father and requested his portion of the inheritance (which would have been a third of it, because he was the younger of the two). The father was not required by law to give it to his son, but because he could see that his son really wanted to leave he granted his wish and let him have his inheritance (the father was friendly).

The Bible then says that the young son went to a "far off place." It was a place where he did what he wanted, when he wanted to do it. Of course, that led to absolutely no good, and before he know it, the son was penniless and dejected in spirit.

There was a famine in the land, so food was hard to come by. He got a job feeding pigs, and apparently it paid so poorly that he looked at what the pigs were eating and got jealous of them.

He knew that he could not return and demand to be taken back. But he thought to himself that even if he went back as his father's slave, he would be better off. So he headed for home.

The Bible says that when he was far off, his father saw him and ran to him, greeting him with kisses. I love that image. It is of a father who is waiting and looking for his son. He did not great him with harsh words but with kisses. (The father showed comfort).

The son humbled himself before his father saying, "I know I have sinned against you. I don't deserve to be called your son." (This shows the father still held authority).

His father didn't listen to him. He had his servants bring his son the best robe, a ring, and sandals (servants did not wear shoes). Then he had them kill the fatted calf and prepare it for a feast in his young son's honor.

The older brother was angry and said, "I have been with you all these years and you never threw me a party."

His father softly replied to him, "Don't be sad... Everything I have is yours, but you brother was and now he is found." (The father was encouraging).

The prodigal son had a father who loved him deeply and who never gave up on him, just as our Father in Heaven loves and believes in us.

Having an earthly father who is a good one gives a head start in life.

We don't have to overcome the past before we can live in the future. Yet no matter how admirable, amazing, astonishing, astounding, awe-inspiring, awesome, brilliant, cool, divine, dynamite, enjoyable, excellent, extraordinary, fabulous, fantastic, groovy, handy-dandy, incredible, magnificent, marvelous, miraculous, outstanding, peachy, phenomenal, pleasant, pleasing, remarkable, sensational, something else, stupendous, super, superb, swell, terrific, too much, tremendous, or wondrous he was, his love, guidance, provision, and wisdom cannot even come close to that of our heavenly Father’s.

"As bad as you are, you still know how to give good gifts to your children. But your Heavenly Father is even more ready to give good things to people who ask."[23]

God created this world and he created us. Who better to help us than the One who knows exactly what we need?

It is important, however, to keep in mind that while some earthly fathers can seem “as good as it gets” in the parenting department, Jesus said in Matthew 19:17 (AMP):"There is only One Who is good [perfectly and essentially]—God"

It is like what the author T.D. Jakes wrote on chapter 16 of his book Daddy Loves His Girls:

Now daughter of mine, I understand as years go by you will see cracks in my pottery and rust on my shiny suit of armor. Alas you will realize that I am just a man. My angel wings will wilt and my faults will manifest and, eventually as you look at me through the mature eyes of womanhood, you will find that your hero was just a man. He has flaws and faults, cracks and crevices. Someday you will find out there will be things I cannot open and mountains I cannot move. I can only offer you Jesus.

He is greater than earthly fathers. We make vows we don’t keep and promises that we fail to accomplish, but not Him. He is able to perform at all times what He has promised in your life.

Humans are imperfect and are bound to disappoint at times. No father, no matter how wonderful he is, can know what you are dealing with every second of the day… but God can. No father can know all the thoughts we have… but God can. And most importantly, no father can know all the wounds you carry… but God can. Not only that, but He can heal them all, as well.

Your Heavenly Father is there, just waiting for you to let Him into your life so that He can save you, heal you, protect you, prosper you, and move your mountains.

But, He is not waiting to love you. He has always loved you. God loves you so much that He gave up everything, that’s right, He held nothing back, just so that He could have a personal relationship with you.

To know God as father is to have a supernatural Father who knew you from even before He formed you in your mother's womb (Jeremiah 1:5), who never ages, and who is the same tower of strength the day we were born that He will be until you die. It means to have a Father who will guide us every step of the way along the path that He has set before you.

When you are Devastated

While the majority of us do come from a family with some type of dysfunction or another, and while we may have been hurt by our fathers in one way or another, when we become adults we are generally able to put the bulk of the pain behind us and move on.

Yet there are some things that happen to us that are not so easy to bounce back from, because they are specifically designed by the enemy to destroy the very core of who we are, of who we were born to be.

Make no mistake about it, we do have an enemy, and he is very crafty. He knows that though a person can survive all kinds of pain, a person cannot withstand a broken spirit.

Proverbs 18:14 (AMP) says, "The strong spirit of a man sustains him in bodily pain or trouble, but a weak and broken spirit who can raise up or bear?" or as the Message bible puts it "A healthy spirit conquers adversity, but what can you do when the spirit is crushed?"

These devastating attacks are so insidious, so covert, that there is no rhyme or reason to them. That is why we are told in 1 Peter 5:8 to "Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour."

God does not want us to walk around afraid that the sky is going to cave in, but He does want us to be on guard so that when we are attacked we will be able to resist it.

While I have had my fair share of pain in this world, all of it together (except for the loss of my husband) cannot compare to each of the following three attacks from the enemy that were designed to crush my spirit. Each of these attacks took place at key points of my life, and while I did not always respond as I should have, I do I offer them up as examples of how we can either allow attacks to shape us or use them to propel us onward toward greater things.

Attack one

When I was around five, I began to be sexually abused at the hands of a couple of non-family members. This continued until I was about ten or eleven. But it was when I was around eight or nine years old that I was first devastated by an attack from the enemy. The words burned deep into my spirit and ended up subconsciously effecting me for years and years to come. Those words were, "You're a whore. That is all you have ever been, and that is all you will ever be."

Looking back, I can honestly say that all the abuse I suffered was nothing compared to the words that were spoken to me at the hands of one of those who were hurting me.

I was only eight years old, and yet the enemy took an arrow that night and tried to do me in. Eight years old, and the any part of me that felt worth anything was gone. I felt dirty, terrible, and just plain worthless.

To make matters worse, when the abuse came out in the open, my father figure at the time took me aside, and instead of saying words that might of helped me to heal, instead (probably because of not knowing what to say) acted like it was no big deal and I should suck it up.

That's what I did for years. Not only did I become promiscuous, but I pushed down all the memories. That worked...for a while.

When those words were spoken over me, I had absolutely no ability to be able to process them, to deny them. I simply believed them, and then spent the next twelve or thirteen years living them out.

What I didn't realize at eight-years-old is that we all have an enemy who is hell-bent on destroying us if he can. And he will use anyone stupid enough to act on his suggestions to do it. That is why we have to be on guard against him.

If one knows that they are going to be attacked beforehand, than half the battle is already won. But all too often the enemy comes against us when we are in the dark about how to defend ourselves, or even know that we need to be defended.

Sometimes when we are devastated by events we may not have all the information. That can do us even more damage.

Although I always believed that what happened to me was swept under the rug, it turned out that this was not the case.

The truth is when my mother happened to, one day, witness the beginning of the abuse, she immediately called the police, filed a report, and made sure the people involved were never allowed near me again.

She thought she had stopped it from happening and did not talk about it with me so as not to upset me. Unfortunately this caused me to push down the memories for years until one day I could hold them back no longer.

I was about twenty-four at the time and had just had my second child. I had heard a comment on TV about the need to face your past if you want a future. Well, that seemed to open a floodgate, and I think I cried for about a week as all the memories came rushing up out of me.

When I was a little girl, I never felt as if I had any value. Oh, I knew my mother loved me and believed in me, but I often felt if I were to disappear I would not be missed. I did not value myself, but looking back I see that God always valued me. He was always there helping me to hang on one more day.

Today God has healed me of all the wounds associated with that abuse, and I can honestly say that looking back, the girl I was seems almost foreign to me, and yet I have learned to honor her.

A few years ago amidst all the family photos hanging on my wall, I hung, for the first time, photos of me as a child. And I have to tell you it felt good to let her come out of hiding.

Attack Two

Surprisingly (or not so), the second attack came right as I was processing my memories of my first attack.

I remember talking about what happened on the phone with a family member when she casually mentioned that my biological father had apparently been denying to everyone (including those closest to me) since I was born, that I was his child.

Well, that sent me into another downward spiral that I almost did not recover from.

Keep in mind that though I was no longer a child, and I was attempting to go to church as often as I could, I did not yet have a close relationship with Jesus. So though I was not eight anymore, I was still very weak minded.

My mom immediately confirmed that I was indeed his child, but that didn't help much. All I knew was that he accepted my siblings but not me. Again I felt like I was less than nothing.

I wanted to give up on life, but God did not give up on me. He slowly and gently restored to me my life, my dignity.

He gave me strength where I only knew weakness and joy where I only knew sadness.

Although my earthly father is no longer alive, and no hope of a happy ending with him is possible, I am OK, because God is my happy ending!!!

Attack three

The third and final attack happened while I was writing this book.

Again it involved a father-type mentor. He was someone whom I thought believed in me, someone I would discuss my future plans with, and whom I always assumed would cheer loudest for me when I succeeded.

I was telling this man how God had put on my heart that one day I would be going to England. To my utter horror, he jumped up from his seat on the couch. He was angry, and stormed toward the door, and said harshly, "Give me a break. You are never going to England." He then proceeded to tell me that I heard God wrong and that I was never going anywhere in my life.

He then said a few more thing that I seem to have blocked out (probably for good reason). But it didn't matter; I got the message. And even though he hesitated at the door and said, "Maybe you will one day show me how wrong I am.”

That didn't matter because the arrow had been lobbed, and my heart received it.

What I heard him say loud and clear that day was "You're a loser. You will never amount to anything and you will never go anywhere in life."

So there I was, at the tail end of writing a book about "Knowing God as Father," and I was yet again felt abandoned by an earthly one.

But this attack was different from the previous ones because this time I knew it was an attack from the enemy and I responded accordingly.

God's word says…

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.[24]

So, knowing that it was an attack, I immediately call my prayer partner and she prayed over me mightily, asking God to take away my pain and replace it with joy and laughter, which He quickly did. I not only was amazed at how quickly God took the pain away and helped me to forget and forgive, but that I even started laughing on the phone with her.

Before we hung up she asked God to make something beautiful out of this horrible experience. I knew that He would answer her prayer, so I wasn't surprised when he quickly put on my heart to write this chapter.

Happily this story ended well in that God stepped in swiftly and repaired my relationship with this man so that it is even better than before.

The person who said those things (almost not even realizing that he said them) was grieved that he caused me such pain and asked for my forgiveness, which I readily gave for I know all too well how I have said something in haste that I deeply regretted. I know that his heart is for me.

God really does see your pain, and I am proof-positive that you can trust him with those things that have devastated with you.

First Peter 5:7 says tells you to cast "all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you." It is important to seek healing from your hurts if you are to ever go forward to a better future, as you can see from the following story found in the Bible.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As we learned in a previous chapter, Abraham was a great man of faith. But interestingly enough, the same cannot be said of his earthly father. Genesis 11 talks about his life.

It starts out simple enough:

Now these are the generations of Terah. Terah fathered Abram, Nahor, and Haran; and Haran fathered Lot.[25]

Terah had three sons and a nephew. It sounds like he had a wonderful life, until the unthinkable happened.

Haran died in the presence of his father Terah in the land of his kindred, in Ur of the Chaldeans[26]

A child dying before his parents. That has to be the worst kind of pain imaginable. Those who have lost a child have truly known devastation!

So what did Terah do when his child died?

Terah took Abram his son and Lot the son of Haran, his grandson, and Sarai his daughter-in-law, his son Abram's wife, and they went forth together from Ur of the Chaldeans to go into the land of Canaan.[27]

They set out for Canaan (otherwise known as the Promised Land). But a very telling thing happened on the way...

when they came to Haran, they settled there.[28]

So Terah, whom I am convinced must have had a word from God to leave behind all the pain of his life and go forward into the brighter things that God had in store for him, came to a place called Haran, and although he was supposed to pass on through, he settled there instead.

There are several of interesting things to note about Haran.

For starters, at one point Haran was actually the center of worship for a moon god named, get this ...Sin!!! Wow. Haran was the center of Sin!

So Terah, who was on his way to the Promised Land, stopped in a place that was all about everything that God was not. It was a pagan culture, and it is said that Terah made a successful living there selling idols (most likely of sin).

Another interesting item to note, and the most important for the sake of discussion, is that Haran is not only the name of the place where Terah stopped his journey, but it is also the name of the son whom he lost.

How many of us, when we are devastated by something, try and keep going, only to be reminded of our pain, before giving up? Terah chose to stop his journey in his pain instead of going through it to the Promised Land.

When things devastate us, it is so easy to throw in the towel, to say, "I have been to hurt I cannot go on any further." I know what it is like to want to do that. But God has such a better life for us if we will not quite and give up-if we will give our lives to Him and let Him lead us past our pain to our pain, to our own Promised Land.

The Bible had only one more thing to say about Terah, and I believe it is the saddest of all: "Terah lived 205 years, and he died in Haran" (Genesis 11:32 NIV). In two hundred and five years on this planet he was never able to get past his devastation.

Please don't be a Terah. Don't let your pain stop you from your destiny. Give your pain to God and let him lead you. No it won't be easy but it is doable. The world needs the best of you push on!

An interesting side note is that Abraham never left Haran, never moved on to bigger and better things, until after his father died. Sometimes, when we stay locked in our pain, we find that we are not the only ones in the jail cell. No, our children are in there with us.

I have seen the situation over and over again, where a parent has been devastated in an area and thinking they are protecting their child, keep them from what just might be their destiny. Psalm 147:3 says of Jesus that He "heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds”[29]

Are you broken hearted? Devastated? Turn to Jesus! He wants to help you arrive at your destination, free from pain and full of possibilities.

Trust God

Not many people enjoy going to the doctor, but according to Reuters, in 1994, one London accountant took that to an extreme. The sixty-three-year-old man knew he needed bladder surgery but he could not overcome his fear of doctors and hospitals. So he self-reliantly did what had to be done: He tried to perform the surgery on himself. Tragically he got an infection from the self-surgery and later died. The coroner said, "Unfortunately, [his] drastic remedy went wrong. A simple operation would have solved the problem."

Just as this man didn't trust doctors or hospitals, many people don't trust God. In their self-reliance, they destroy themselves.[30]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Isaiah 40 talks about trusting in and waiting for God...

They who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they

shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be

weary; they shall walk and not faint[31].

I have been walking with the Lord for quite a while now, and if I have learned anything I have learned that God is faithful. Or to put it another way, God is trustworthy.

As I sit and write this, I am reminded of God trustworthiness in my own life.

In about a month’s time my children and I will again experience the anniversary my husband and their father's death to cancer. I don’t think anything on earth tests God’s faithfulness more than the death of a loved one, unless it is having to be completely dependent on God financially because of it.

Allan was the provider for our family, so when he died it was naturally assumed by some that I would have to be on welfare. But what they didn’t realize is that our God is a faithful God.

The day Allan died I remember looking up and saying, “Okay, God, now You are our provider. You have to take care of our family ”and I also remember thinking, Wow I can’t believe that I have grown so much that even faced with the possibility in which my rug will be pulled out from underneath me, I am not afraid, because I know that God will sustain me.

By the time of Allan’s passing I had been walking with the Lord for quite a while and had done quite a bit of growing up as He led me from being a complete nervous wreck who worried every day about how and why and where this or that or the other was going to happen, to a spiritually strong woman who was confident in the Lord's faithfulness.

It's like it says in Matthew 7:24-25:

Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock.

In other words, it is important that we get rooted and grounded in Christ when times are good, so that when times are hard we won't be destroyed.

In this world full of uncertainties, it is natural to wonder why we should trust God. But a better question might be, why not trust in God when the alternatives might be trusting in

People

Put no trust in a neighbor; have no confidence in a friend; guard the doors

of your mouth from her who lies in your arms Or the son treats the father with

contempt, the daughter rises up against her mother, the daughter-in-law against

her mother-in-law; a man’s enemies are the men of his own house. 7But as

for me, I will look to the LORD[32]

People are not perfect, and because of that fact we all let each other down occasionally. For example many people get married with the expectation that the other person will never let them down. They spend their wedding night gazing into each other's starry eyes, holding hands, and lovingly saying to each other, "You complete me." Then they get home from the honeymoon, he leaves the toilet seat up, she hollers, "I almost fell in! Why can't you be more thoughtful?" And this causes him to respond defensively, which starts the whole ball of turmoil rolling.

Two people, who just days before had confessed their undying love and respect for each other, are now at each other's throats. Why? Because you can't live your life in a bubble; things happen, people get frustrated, and they blow up. You don't get through this life without some drama.

I’m not saying that God wants us to be suspicious of everyone. We were designed for fellowship with other people. Yet it is important to remember that though people will sometimes hurt us and let us down, there is someone who never will.

His name is Jesus and He is trustworthy 100 percent of the time.

I started a blog about just that. It is called Trusting God. The address is

Iamtrustinggod.com

Riches ~

Don't wear yourself out trying to get rich; restrain yourself!

Riches disappear in the blink of an eye; wealth sprouts wings

and flies off into the wild blue yonder.[33]

How many newspaper headlines tell of people who were rich beyond their wildest dreams, but then they commit suicide. Why? Because they trusted that their wealth would fill the hole inside them that only God can fill and it was never designed to do that.

It doesn’t matter if you are living in a cramped one-bedroom apartment or a large mansion. By the world’s standards, Americans are considered rich. We have so much more than the eight-member family living in a shack situated in a garbage dump in Mexico or a grass hut in the jungles of Africa. But no matter how much we make or how many things we own, we are never totally secure because only a relationship with God can do that for us.

Proverbs 11:28 reminds us that Whoever trusts in his riches will fall, but the righteous will

thrive like a green leaf (NIV). It is important to remember that our job is not our source, God is our source.

Ourselves

There's no such thing as self-rescue, pulling yourself up by your bootstraps.

The cost of rescue is beyond our means, and even then it doesn't guarantee

Life forever, or insurance against the Black Hole.[34]

So many times, people - especially those who have been deeply hurt by their fathers - think all they need is themselves. They don’t need help from anyone. Like the proverbial two-year-old, they say, “Leave me alone; I can do it myself!”

They have a wall up around their heart so high that no one can see over the top. What they don’t realize is that no matter what they do for themselves, they will never be able to save themselves from pain or death.

Anyone can see that the brightest and best die, wiped out right along with fools and dunces. They leave all their prowess behind, move into their new home, The Coffin,

The cemetery their permanent address. And to think they named counties after themselves! We aren't immortal. We don't last long. Like our dogs, we age and weaken. And die. This is what happens to those who live for the moment, who only look out for themselves: Death herds them like sheep straight to hell; they disappear down the gullet of the grave; They waste away to nothing-- nothing left but a marker in a cemetery.[35]

But me? God snatches me from the clutch of death, he reaches down and grabs me

Rough words, yes, but true all the same. We can do a lot to help ourselves in this life through our hard work and determination, but when this life is over, there is only one who can save us.

Idols

Be careful to not get involved in activities connected with idols.[36]

It is easy to think of idols as objects made of metal that people from the past had worshiped, but in reality an idol is anything that we worship with our thoughts, time, or gifts - anything that we put before God. These can include movie stars, material possessions, a relationship, a job, money, or ourselves.

If we find ourselves obsessively thinking about something or someone and it is not God, then it’s an idol. I know that idols can make us feel ooey-gooey or important or both, but the thing about idols is that when times get rough and the waters start rising, if we try and hold on to them we will sink every time.

While trusting in people, riches, idols, or ourselves may leave us flat, trusting in God never will. Because when we do we can trust that He will:

Deliver us

For I will surely save you, and you shall not fall by the sword,

but you shall have your life as a prize of war, because you have

put your trust in me, declares the Lord.[37]

If I had to list everything that God has delivered me from in the last ten years, it might just have doubled the size of this book. I will not bore anyone by doing so, but I will tell you that when it comes to all the gook and gunk (some might call it "crap") in our lives, God delivers faster and with more love than Pizza Hut. Why? Because God doesn’t want us to waste our lives stuck in a pit of misery. He wants us to have a good life, and is just waiting for us to come to Him for help.

It is a step-by-step process, and it doesn’t happen overnight, but if we put God first we are guaranteed to be delivered from the things that are holding us back from becoming all we were born to be.

Be our Security

Those who trust in the Lord are like Mount Zion, which

cannot be moved, but abides forever.[38]

It doesn't matter what is going on in the world, those who trust in God do not have to let their unhappy circumstances get them down. Because those who trust in God are people who learn to look by faith and not by sight.

For example, as I was finishing up this book and getting prepared to start back up in school after the summer break, I started running short of money. I knew that God did not want me to quit school, so I prayed and felt that he told me to stand firm.

When I looked with my natural eyes at my bills that started to pile up, I was tempted to freak out, and get a job (probably minimum wage) that would almost pay the bills, if I was lucky.

I knew that I could not put in the forty-plus hours a week that my university required of me and keep a job too, so I asked God in prayer if He wanted me to drop out and He strongly answered no.

About a week later when taking my morning prayer walk, I kept hearing the word grant over and over, so I got a clue, and found out about a grant that my college had. I applied and was accepted in an hour. It is enough extra money to keep me going for a while.

And that is how God works. He wants you to not act out of your circumstances but out of your trust in Him.

Keep Us on The Right Path

In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.[39]

We all make hundreds of decisions each day, most which are insignificant, however some decisions will greatly impact our lives.

Unfortunately, we do not always know realize that at the time we are making them. As a result we sometimes get led down a path we never intended nor wanted to take.

One of the things that I absolutely love about being a Christ-follower is that God will let me know when I am about to go down the wrong path. And even if I choose go down it anyway, get myself in a big mess, and call out to Him, He is faithful to pluck me out of the mess and set me back on the right path.

Give us hope

He raises up the poor from the dust; he lifts the needy from the

ash heap to make them sit with princes and inherit a seat of

honor. For the pillars of the earth are the Lord's,

and on them he has set the world.[40]

As we learn to really trust in God, all of our fears about the “what if’s” in life will begin to go away. Remember, it doesn’t matter to God who we are or where we have come from; if we let Him, He will exchange all of our worries with hope for a brighter future.

I know a lot about this topic because I started worrying around age five and didn’t stop for almost thirty years. I even used to worry that I was worrying too much and would get an ulcer. I spent so much time worrying I never had any time left to be creative or have fun.

The more I learned to trust God, the more my mind was freed so that I could concentrate on things that mattered. It wasn’t easy breaking out of the habit of worrying, but God helped me every step of the way and I grew stronger and stronger as a result. I now realize that no one is a “born worrier” - we all were created to live hope-filled lives.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The fear of man lays a snare, but

whoever trusts in the Lord is safe.[41]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When talking about trusting in the Lord, I would be remiss if I did not talk about Abraham.

Romans 4:11 says that "Abraham is the spiritual father of those who have faith" (NLT). Why? One may ask. The answer is found by looking at his life story.

As you may recall, Abraham was born and raised in a place called the Ur of the Chaldeans. Sometime after he was married (to a wife who could not conceive children), his brother died and his father moved him and his family to a place where people worshiped Sin. No it was not Los Vegas, Sin was a moon God and the place was Haran. Later he moved on from there when God told him to.

Now the LORD said to Abram, "Go from your country and your kindred and your father’s house to the land that I will show you. And I will make of you a great nation, and I will bless you and make your name great, so that you will be a blessing. I will bless those who bless you, and him who dishonors you I will curse, and in you all the families of the earth shall be blessed. So Abram went, as the LORD had told him, and Lot went with him. Abram was seventy-five years old when he departed from Haran (Genesis 12:1-4).

Sounds pretty good to me. I think I would have left too. But it must not have been easy for him, because as the Bible states Abram was seventy-five years old when he departed from Haran.

And Abram took Sarai his wife, and Lot his brother’s son, and all their possessions that they had gathered, and the people that they had acquired in Haran, and they set out to go to the land of Canaan (Genesis 12:5).

Abraham was seventy-five years old (old enough to hand out at the nearest retirement home), and yet he trusted God enough to pack up everything he owned and move to where God told him to go. That was no small feat, either. Remember there were no cars back then so their version of U-Haul was a camel and a strong back.

When Abraham arrived at his destination, he must of thought (or at least I would have), "Here I am. I did what you said, God. So bring on the babies." Unfortunately (and is often the case), things did not quite work the easily.

Long story short, Abraham went through a lot more stuff (including a near miss with Sodom and Gomorrah), and a lot more years passed before he saw his promise come to fruition.

In fact, Abraham was ninety-nine years old when his wife finally conceived, and was 100 when his beloved son, Isaac, was born. That was twenty-five years after God had made His promise to him.

Romans 4:18-25 says it best:

In hope he believed against hope, that he should become the father of many nations, as he had been told, "So shall your offspring be." He did not weaken in faith when he considered his own body, which was as good as dead (since he was about a hundred years old), or when he considered the barrenness of Sarah’s womb. No distrust made him waver concerning the promise of God, but he grew strong in his faith as he gave glory to God, fully convinced that God was able to do what he had promised. That is why his faith was "counted to him as righteousness." But the words "it was counted to him" were not written for his sake alone, but for ours also. It will be counted to us who believe in him who raised from the dead Jesus our Lord, who was delivered up for our trespasses and raised for our justification.

Trusting when you have been hurt before is no easy task, I know. But it is worth the effort because it is through that trust that we are able to have a more intimate relationship with God.

Our relationship with God will not only heal us from the inside out, but it will bring us into a better way of living.

To know God as Father is to know that “Those who trust in the Lord are like Mount Zion, which cannot be moved, but abides forever” (Psalm 125:1-2). It is to know that “He who calls you is faithful" (1 Thessalonians 5:24), and as we stand in our knowledge of his goodness we will be standing on solid ground.

Believe God

George Muller was a man who believed God.

In order to prove to Christians worldwide that God listens to us when we pray, he started and keep running orphanage in Bristol, England, on nothing but prayer.

He did not solicit funds from anyone, nor did he allow his employees to do so.

On April 11, 1836, the doors of an orphanage opened in with twenty-six girls. By 1886 the number of Orphans leapt to over 2,000, proving that Mr. Muller's belief in God was not in vain. Mr. Muller's amazing faith was witnessed firsthand by many people who met him, but none more so than Abigail, the eight-year-old daughter of his business associate.

One Morning while Abigail's father was having a meeting with George, an employee came in and told Mr. Muller that over 300 children were seated and waiting for breakfast but there was nothing to feed them.

George motioned to Abigail to follow him into where the children were seated and said to her, "Watch God work." Then he turned to the children and said, "Let’s pray." They all did, and not long after was a knock at the door.

He opened it to find a baker who had baked all night because “God had told him to do so.” He brought in enough bread for the children to have their fill.

Right after there was another knock at the door. Almost unbelievably a man with ten barrels of milk on his cart told George that the wheel on his car had just broke down in front of the orphanage.

He told George that he could have the milk if he would only keep the barrels safe until he fixed the cart.

George knew that Abigail was moved by what she had seen, and a week or so later was told by Abigail's mother that she had witnessed Abigail praying to God that He might give her "Mr. Muller's faith."

Now, to change the subject a bit. Don’t freak out, but….

We Are Going To Die

Wait! Don’t hyperventilate! I don’t mean right this second.

If you are young, chances are you will live another fifty or sixty years (or more, depending on luck and good eating habits). Or, in the event of some age-defying breakthrough, maybe you will live another hundred years, but that’s it. One hundred and twenty years from now, we will be one of two places but we won’t be on Planet Earth.

To get a good visual of what I am talking about, grab a can of hairspray and, holding the can away from your face, give it a small tap on the nozzle. See that puff that came out? Well, in light of eternity, that was your life.

The Bible says In James 4:14, What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes.

It’s mind-boggling to me that majority of people spend more time researching where they are going to take a vacation than where they are going to end up for all eternity.

The fact is that we all will spend “forever” somewhere, so it just might make a little sense to start think about where “somewhere” is.

God wants us to spend eternity with Him, but before we can, there is decision that we have to make. God gave us some clues to help point us in the right direction in that decision.

Creation

Our planet is ninety-three million miles away from the sun.

If the sun were any closer to earth we would burn up.

If the sun were any farther away we would freeze.

Our planet tilts exactly 23 degrees on its axis, giving us four seasons a year.

If it tilted at any other angle, we would have massive continents of ice.

The moon is at the exact distance from earth to give us two ocean tides a day.

If it were any greater or lesser distance, the earth would be flooded.

The ocean floor is at a depth that gives us oxygen, which sustains human life.

If the depth were any different, the air we breathe would be poisonous.

The atmosphere is the exact density to keep meteors and Space objects from hitting us.

If it were any thinner, we would be constantly bombarded by objects from outer space.

Anne Graham Lotz in Just Give me Jesus asks, “And Who keeps all this in perfect order? Who keeps earth from getting sucked into some gigantic black hole, or planets from spinning out of control, or stars from falling from the sky? Who keeps people upright on earth while it turns on its axis? The laws of nature? Gravity? And where did gravity come from? Who established the laws of nature? Who gives people the very breath they breathe?”[42]

Good questions! Questions that demand answers. And the best place to start looking for them is…

The Bible

Theodore Roosevelt said that “A thorough knowledge of the Bible is worth more than a college education.”  As one who is currently going to college to study the Bible, I would have to say that while both are important (one gives us head knowledge and the other leads to wisdom), I would have to agree with Teddy and choose the Bible as the most important.

Why believe that the Bible is really God’s word? I think it the evidence points shows it to be.

In fact:

No book has been so bitterly opposed and treated as has been the Bible! For centuries, its adversaries have tried to:

burn it out of existence

discredit it and

forecast its demise

Yet here it is, thousands of years later, and it is still around and thriving. I believe that no plan to destroy the Bible will ever prosper because, as God put it: The grass withers, and the flower falls, but the word of the Lord remains forever.[43]

Some other very interesting facts about His Book include the following:

Although it's bound into one volume, the Bible isn't a single book. It's more like a library. The word Bible comes from the Greek word 'BIBLIA,' meaning books.

It contains 3,566,480 letters, 773,746 words, 31,102 verses, 1,189 chapters, and 66 books.

It was written by forty-plus men who were: doctors, kings, tax collectors (the worst of the worst at that time), fisherman, exiles, military leaders, prophets, and statisticians. All were from very different backgrounds.

It was as written over a period of 1,600 years - from about 1500 B.C. to 100 A.D. The books of Moses were written 500 years before the earliest Hindu Scriptures. Moses wrote Genesis 2,000 years before Muhammad penned the Koran.

It was written on scores of different subjects.

It was written in widely varying and difficult circumstances, such as living in the wilderness (Moses), living in prison (Paul), and living in exile (John).

It was written on three different continents (Africa, Asia, and Europe).

It was written in three different languages (Hebrew, Aramaic, and Greek). Yet the content remains consistent in its unfolding of the plan of salvation through Christ Jesus.

The copies that are sold, given away, or otherwise distributed in the United States total about 168,000 per day. Year after year, it outsells any other book in print.

It is split into two main parts - the Old Testament and the New Testament. The word testament means "covenant" or "mutual understanding or agreement" - It contains God’s covenant with His people.

It contains historical data in specific detail, much of which has proven true through archeological finds.

It contains hundreds of predictions about the future.

It is inerrant (without error in the original manuscripts). People in the Bible may have made errors (don’t we all?), but the writing of Scripture is free from error. It is an accurate record.

It holds the distinction of being the first printed book; it was first reprinted in 1450 A.D. Although it is the oldest book in the world, it retains a freshness which appeals to every generation.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

All that was very interesting to me, but thing that really blew me away was the way God put it together in such a way so that there would be no mistakes about who the author really is.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What is the shortest chapter in the Bible?

Answer - Psalms 117

What is the longest chapter in the Bible?

Answer - Psalms 119

Which chapter is in the center of the Bible?

Answer - Psalms 118

Fact: There are 594 chapters before Psalms 118

Fact: There are 594 chapters after Psalms 118

Add these numbers up and you get 1188.

What is the center verse in the Bible?

Answer - Psalms 118:8

Does this verse say something significant about God's perfect will for our lives?

Of course it does!

God is the Ultimate Creator, isn’t He?

The book of Isaiah is constructed much like the entire Bible.

Bible: 66 books.

Isaiah: 66 chapters.

Bible: First 39 books mainly concern Israel.

Isaiah: First 39 chapters mainly concern Israel.

Bible: Last 27 books concern the life and coming of Jesus Christ.

Isaiah: Last 27 chapters concern the life and coming of Jesus Christ.

Erwin W. Lutzer, senior pastor of the world famous Moody Church in Chicago said, “The Bible is a mirror, not a photograph. A mirror shows us like we are; we can’t add more hair, a bit of robust color, and with a slight of hand remove all blemishes. No wonder the Bible frightens those who are unwilling to face their sins but is a balm to those who are finally prepared to own up to their need and accept the redemption of Christ.”

Yes while Creation and the Bible are important they only are there to point the way to…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jesus

He was born in an obscure village, the child of a peasant woman. Until He was thirty, He worked in a carpenter shop and then for three years He was an itinerant preacher. He wrote no books. He held no office. He never owned a home. He was never in a big city. He never traveled two hundred miles from the place He was born. He never did any of the things that usually accompany greatness. The authorities condemned His teachings. His friends deserted Him. One betrayed Him to His enemies for a paltry sum. One denied Him. He went through the mockery of a trial. He was nailed on a cross between two thieves. While He was dying, His executioners gambled for the only piece of property He owned on earth: His coat. When He was dead He was taken down and placed in a borrowed grave. Nineteen centuries have come and gone, yet today He is the crowning glory of the human race, the adored leader of hundreds of millions of the earth`s inhabitants. All the armies that ever marched and all the Navies that were ever assembled and all the parliaments that ever sat and all the rulers that ever reigned - combined - have not affected the life of man upon this earth so profoundly as that One Solitary Life.[44]

If, as some claim that Jesus wasn’t God, then :

Why did H.G. Wells, the English Novelist and historian who’s five volumes on world history are on the shelves of almost every college and university library, end up giving way more space to Jesus Christ than anyone else when he was at the least a skeptic and at the most an atheist (or should that be the other way around)?

Why, when people swear, do they use the name of Jesus? Why don’t we ever hear Buddha or Muhammad's name used as a swear word?

Why do we know who He is thousands of years later, and why is he still studied and talked about more than any other person ever born?

Why is it that Jesus was only in ministry for three years and yet is unparalleled as a moral, artistic, humanitarian, and scholastic influence, as well being unparalleled in His ability to inspire devotion, His impact on woman, and His influence on freedom and justice?

Why is it that Jesus fulfilled all 109 distinct prophecies – which were written at least 250 to 400 years prior to His birth - that the Messiah had to fulfill?

As Dennis Pollock says For one of them to be fulfilled by one individual requires a man so unusual and a life so unique as to eliminate all pretenders as well as all men who ever lived – except one! The odds that only 20 of those 109 prophecies could be fulfilled in one person are 1 in 1,125,000,000,000,000. To visualize those odds, picture the state of Texas covered a half-inch deep with quarters. Now paint one red and have someone mix it up with the others somewhere in the state, then blindfold yourself and try to pick the quarter out on your first attempt.

Why is our whole system of years based on Him? (B.C. and A.D.)

Why it is that Jesus (a simple yet brilliant man, a man who should have been forgotten long ago by the entire world) is still the most loved and respected man who ever lived, over 2000 years after His death? History shows us that wherever the story of His life and message has been taken, lives have been transformed, resulting in tremendous gains in education, laws, society, and culture?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So why did Jesus have to die for us?

God is Holy – We are not!

When God created the first man and woman (Adam and Eve), He gave them everything they could want - including the freedom to choose between good and evil. Their wrong choice caused death (both spiritual and physical) to enter the world. For this reason, we are all separated from God.

God’s holiness demands justice (that the sinner be judged and condemned to eternal separation from Him).

God has no choice but to demand justice. He cannot help who He is. And because of this those who die without being saved end up in a place where the temperature is permanently hot, and all contact with God is permanently lost …. HELL.

God loves us so much that he sent his Son to save us.

We can do nothing to save ourselves. It is only through the shed blood of Jesus Christ that we can have a personal relationship with an awesome God.

As Paul E. BillHeimer says in “Destined for the Throne,”

Since Jesus was conceived by the Holy Spirit He was NOT the fallen son of Adam. Therefore Satan had no claim upon Him. But because He was “made of a woman” He was an authentic human being and could therefore qualify as a bona fide member of the human race to enter the legal fight to reclaim Adam’s lost estate. Jesus, who was a sinless man, took our sins on him (no easy task) - took the punishment that we deserved for those sins, which cancels any legal claims or right that Satan has upon the earth and man.

Because Jesus paid the price for our sins, we can have true fellowship with God if we just believe.

We can talk to God right where we are, any time of the day or night.

It is no coincidence that you are reading this book. God has a plan for your life and that plan includes your salvation.

Jesus said, "I am the way, and the truth, and the life.

No one comes to the Father except through me[45].

You may be thinking, but you don’t know what terrible things I have done. If you really knew who I was and what I have done, you would tell me it is too late for forgiveness.

Yet John 3:16 tells us that God So Loved the World (that means every single person who ever was or will be) that He sent His only Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish.

None of us - not me, you, the owner of the local store, or the President of the United States, are without sin. We have all done or thought about things that we wouldn’t want anyone to know about. And while we may view one sin as being worse than another, we have to understand that God is Holy and to Him all sins are the same.

Jesus hung out with people who had some messed up pasts because, He was not as concerned about their past as He was about their future.

I can guarantee this truth: Those who listen to what I say and

believe in the one who sent me will have eternal life. They won't

be judged because they have already passed from death to life.[46]

Even the twelve who were closest to Jesus – His disciples - were not without baggage, as exemplified when one of them said, “Go away from me Lord; I am a sinful man.”[47]

Did Jesus say, “Yeah, you’re right. You reek of sin. I can’t hang out with you, you’ll ruin my reputation”?

Or did He say, “Get thou away from Me or I will mock you, make your life miserable, and throw you into a lake of fire?”

No, of course not! His response was simply, “Don't be afraid. From now on you will catch people instead of fish.”[48]

Jesus is concerned about your future, not your past.

Jill M. Richardson said, "Jesus wasted little time on verdicts. He asked just one question of those who come to Him. …”Do you Love Me?”

Others might be asking, “Yeah, but why Jesus would die for me? I mean, I am no one special.”

I used to feel like that. I used to think that if I was the only person on Earth, then Jesus would not have come. I was wrong, of course, and I have come to realize that God loves each one of us equally - that He would have sent Jesus if I was the only one on Earth, or if you were.

Beauty doesn't come from hairstyles, gold jewelry, or clothes.

Rather, beauty is something internal that can't be destroyed...

which God considers precious. [49]

There is good news: it doesn’t matter how we feel, we are special, wonderful, terrific, splendid, precious, and B.E.A.UTIFUL in the eyes of God.

If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord

and believe in your heart that God raised him

from the dead, you will be saved.[50]

The fact that Jesus rose to life is what the whole gospel is based on. If He wasn't raised from the dead, than He would have just been an ordinary - although extremely intelligent - man. The fact that He rose from the dead proves that He was who He said He was, and could do what He said He could do.

If you are like I was at times, a “doubting Thomas,” and have a hard time believing, then once again I urge you to get a hold of a Bible, and spend some time studying for yourself.

God will guide you to the truth.

In order to be saved you must:

1. Admit that you are a sinner and need salvation. This is where most people get stuck, because people tend to think they are too good to need to be saved.

2. Believe in your heart that Jesus died on the cross to pay for your sins and that He rose again to conquer death.

3. Ask Jesus to come into your heart and acknowledge Him as your lord and savior.

4. Go and tell someone about your decision. The great thing about salvation is that it is for everyone! It doesn’t matter where we have been, what we have done, or whom we have done it with! It doesn’t even matter if we feel like giving our lives’ to God. If we know in our heads that it is the right thing to do, then that is all that matters, because we are special, wonderful, terrific, splendid, precious, and B.E.A.UTIFUL in the eyes of God.

To know God as Father is to know that “you will be saved, if you honestly say, "Jesus is Lord," and if you believe with all your heart that God raised him from death” (Romans 10:9). A whole new life is waiting for you…Pray this prayer right now:

Dear Father

I confess that I have sinned against you in thought, word, and deed. I believe that you sent your only begotten son, Jesus Christ, to suffer and die for me upon the cross. I now give you my life. Cleanse me from all my sins and make me new, I promise to live for you every day of my life.

In Jesus’ name, Amen

If you prayed that prayer

Welcome Home!!!

I would love to hear about it!!

IAmTrustingGod.com

Know God

In 6th grade I remember my teacher telling the class something that rocked my world. She said, “You know, you can be close to God.”

I thought real hard about that. Be close to God? But He’s so… important and I’m, well, not! Why would he want to be close to me?”

She went on to say that God was always there watching over us and longing for us to know Him in a more deep and personal way.

I was shocked, because up until then I had always thought of God as a far-off, distant entity that I had to be in awe and fear of twenty-four/seven. I viewed God like Dorothy first viewed the Wizard of Oz, unseen and scary, with a loud booming voice.

Yet as I have grown closer to God, I have realized that while getting to the heart of the wizard revealed him to be nothing more than a fraud, a sheep in wolf’s clothing, the closer and more intimate I have become with God, the more aware I am of how amazing He really is.

So how does one come to know and be close to the all-knowing, all-seeing creator of the universe? Well a good place to start would be …

PRAYER

Prayer is our life line to God. It is how we communicate to our heavenly Father. Prayer should be like talking with an old friend; it was designed to provide easy access to God.

Think about That!

How lucky are we that the Person who shapes the mountains and calms the seas wants to talk with little ol’ us!

And the cool thing is He never tires of talking with us.

1Thessalonians 5:17, which tells us to, Pray without ceasing.

I remember reading that scripture for the first time and thinking, God wants me to pray all day long? I’m not too sure about that.

Later, I realized that God didn’t want me to lock myself in a room and pray all day, but that He wants me to live my life as if He is my constant companion.

Just like a mother will keep a constant ear out for her children as she cleans, so should we too keep an ear out to hear our Father as we go about our day.

God wants us to converse with him openly. He wants us to remember that He is available twenty-four/seven. No matter the time of day (or night), God is always there.

I love what John Devries has to say on this subject:

If a world leader were personally available to us through a “hotline” telephone at all hours of the day or night, we would feel tremendously honored. And what if this important person were willing to just chat about things? Would we dream of saying, “Why should I talk to him?”

Prayer is a privilege that God has granted us, and we should view it as such. With that said, it is important to remember that God is our Father and not Santa Clause. Sometimes we get stuck believing that prayer is more of a way to beg for that thing we have to have than it is a way to strengthen our relationship with our Father.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’ve done some major begging in my day, but I have learned that all that “stuff” I thought I had to have was either just getting in the way of what I was put on this earth to do (which is to know God and to do His will), or was nothing compared to what God had in store for me, if I would just press in to knowing Him more.

Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness,

and all these things will be added to you.[51]

Prayer is not about getting stuff!

Prayer is about the following:

Adoration: The Bible tells us to enter into His courts with praise. We have to remember who God is and act accordingly when coming into His presence.

Confession: God is holy, and when we sin we separate ourselves from Him. If we are separated from Him, then He won’t hear our prayers. If He won’t hear our prayers and move on our behalf, then we are powerless (because remember, the only power we have comes from Him).

Restitution: We have to make good the wrong, wherever possible. Sometimes when we have confessed our sins to God, He will require us to make it right with the person we hurt, or people we did wrong to before we bring our petitions back to Him.

It can be a scary and very humbling thing to do, but it is important that we do what is asked of us. To ignore God’s instruction means to gain His silence, and believe me, He can outwait anyone.

Thanksgiving: It’s not just a holiday; it’s an attitude of the heart. The Bible tells us that unless we are thankful we cannot even enter into the presence of God. Think about it! Why would God want to bless us with something new, if we can’t even appreciate what we already have? The In the Bible we are told to:

Give thanks in all circumstances;

for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.[52]

Forgiveness: Every single one of us will not get through this life without having to both forgive and be forgiven for something. Whenever I am tempted to live in unforgiveness, I am reminded that God sent Jesus to die so that my sins could be forgiven, and I am told that if I don’t forgive others I won’t be forgiven (see Matthew 6:14-15). It is not easy, but it is expected of us and totally do-able. And it is worth it because “To forgive is to set a prisoner free and realize that prisoner was you.”[53]

Unity: Because we are taught in today’s culture to expect the very best of everything because it is all about “me,” unity can be hard to do. Yet we were not that it should be The Bible tells us in Mathew 18:19: If two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven.

The Adam Clarke Commentary also makes a good point about the importance of unity:

“If two of you shall agree” is a metaphor taken from a number of musical instruments set to the same key, and playing the same tune: here, it means a perfect agreement of the hearts, desires, wishes, and voices, of two or more persons praying to God. It also intimates that as a number of musical instruments, skillfully played, in a good concert, are pleasing to the ears of men, so a number of persons united together in warm, earnest, cordial prayer is highly pleasing in the sight and ears of the Lord.[54]

Faith: Ever seen a mustard seed? I have. It’s pretty darn small, about the size of a pencil dot. In our world of “bigger is always better,” anything that small is usually ruled insignificant. Yet Jesus said:

I assure you, even if you had faith as small as a mustard seed you could say

to this mountain, `Move from here to there,' and it would move.

Nothing would be impossible.[55]

Think about that! If a speck of faith can move a mountain, then half of a half of a speck could surely provide a much needed job, or resolve a relationship situation, or even help land that new account at the office.

No, it is not easy to say, “Okay, God, I am giving You this problem. You fix it and/or show me what to do, and I will not worry but will have faith in what you can do,”

When I first started using my faith muscles, it was very hard. I was used to worrying about everything, and so I would give God my problem, take it back, and then give it to him again over and over until I started to see the pattern. When I took it, I dropped the ball, but when He took it, I scored every time.

Petition: September 11, 2001, was a day of contradictions. The loss of life was great as was our countries hurt and despair, but the faith that I saw rise up around the country was beautiful.

I watched TV News Anchors on both the local and national news asking us to pray (or petition) God to help us. Amazingly, some of them said that they would be praying, as well.

Why did that happen? Because I believe that no matter how much we as a people want to deny it, we instinctively know that God is real and hears our petitions.

Submission: In the beginning of my Christian walk, I wanted what I wanted when I wanted it. I was not so much concerned with doing God’s will as I was concerned about doing what I wanted. I was afraid that if I asked for God to show me His will, I would be forced to lead a boring life.

But the closer and more submitted to God I have become, I have realized there is no greater joy to be found then when I am in the center of His perfect will.

That the path He has chosen for me is more exciting that I could ever have imagined. Of course, being submitted to God’s will is not always easy. He does expect more of me than I have expected of myself, but being submitted to His will is always worth it because I know that where God is leading me is where I was created to go.

Another way we get to know God is through reading His word.

The Bible

“It’s boring, it’s outdated, it has nothing to do with the way I live day to day,” you might be thinking. I used to think the same way. Yet as I plunged into it, I realized that the Bible is alive! It is God’s main way of talking to us, His love letter to us. Reading the Bible is…

Calming: No matter the circumstance I am facing, God's Word always calms my fears. We live in a great big world, with lots of things in it that can go wrong. Before I walked with the Lord, I was constantly worried about everything. I even used to walk around having what I call “white terrors,” when I could not think of anything but the fact that I could die at any moment. When they happened my vision was limited and I was 100 percent tense.

How did I get that bad?

By allowing the worries of the world to invade my thoughts until it was almost physically impossible for me to be calm.

God has since spoke truths so deep into my spirit that no amount of doomsday news will ever cause me to live in that fear again.

And He did it through His Word – the Bible. While it has been decades since I had any “white terrors,” I still have things come up that might cause me some anxiety, so I run to the Word and through it God calms my fears and gives me the strength to carry on.

Confrontational (with the truth): God wants to grow us up into mature Christians, and sometimes that means showing us where we are going wrong.

I cannot say it enough: the Bible is alive! It is not just another book, and God, because of his deep love for us and His unwillingness to let us go down a path that He knows will lead to our ultimate harm, will use scripture to open our eyes about the wrong choices we are making.

Keep in mind, God does not confront us because He is an angry father waiting to yell at us for doing something wrong. No, God only, I believe, confronts out of His deep love for us. It is like the saying “God will meet us where we are, but He loves us too much to leave us where He found us.”

Our Compass: Most people just kind of float through life, doing whatever they feel like. While that may sound good at the time, there are consequences, such as living a meaningless life.

It is sad that there are people who have no clue what they were born to do and as a result they have no passion for life.

If we are not using our gifts and talents in the ways that God created us to use them, then we cannot be truly happy. Reading the Bible is like following a blueprint. It is a compass we can follow to navigate the unknown waters and get us to where we were born to be: in the center of God’s will.

Another way to Know God is through

Music

If praying is about our speaking to God, and reading the Bible is about His speaking to us, I believe that worshipping is about our being with God, no agenda other than to be in His presence.

About ten years ago I watched a news show that questioned the connection to God that many people felt as they worshiped Him through music. Brain scans showed a part of the brain that was affected or reached only when people were worshipping and suggested that the feeling of closeness to God one felt while doing so was just a biological function.

A nun responded with the following: “If God created us, then it would only make sense that he wired us to biologically respond to him in such a way.” Listening to music touches a part of your brain and spirit not that is accessible in any other way.

New Christians are often hesitant to worship God through music because it may feel weird at first. If they were to just lay aside their feelings and do it anyway, they would begin to really understand what it is to lose themselves in God’s love. God is love, and where His presence is, there is love. And they would gather the strength it takes for them to follow Him closely.

God longs to hear our hopes and calm our fears. He will guide us through His word and touch us as we worship.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

To know God as Father means knowing that no matter how far we wander, we are never more than a prayer away. We also know that we are not made to “do life” by winging it, but instead have been given an instruction manual, the Bible. And finally, to know God through worship means that we are allowing ourselves the chance to know our amazing, wonderful, magnificent Father in a way that may seem foreign at first but will strengthen our bond with Him in ways we have not previously known.

Follow God

I remember the first time my husband, Allan, ever willingly went to a Christian event. I was just beginning to follow God when I heard on the radio that the Christian contemporary artist Michael W. Smith was coming to town. Right then, I knew I had to get the tickets. Because I knew that God wanted me to.

At first I wasn’t sure he would go, because up until the time of the concert my husband thought Christians were mindless robots who blindly followed a boring leader; it was only through prayer and hearing a Michael W. Smith CD that he was convinced to go.

I remember that on the night of the concert Allan tried so hard to get out of going to it. I think that he was afraid of being indoctrinated or something. He promised me everything under the sun if we could just go somewhere else, but I wouldn’t budge.

I am glad, because from the first song he was - in his words - “blown away.” He had “no idea that Christian music could be so good.” Then at the intermission he went outside to have a cigarette and was so amazed to find that other Christians actually smoked (not that I’d advise it). He later said, “I guess you don’t turn into a mindless robot after all.” I was like, “Well, duh!”

Though it was a number of years before he was to give his life to the Lord, from that night on his favorite musician (other than our daughter) was Michael W. Smith.

Just like in my late husband’s case, I am convinced that one of the major things that causes us to resist a real and radically life-changing relationship with our loving, heavenly Father is unrealistic fear of being turned into mindless robots that are forced to follow a boring leader into a life of monotony.

But the fear is not reality!

God created the world - all of it - and so it stands to reason that He created fun, excitement, and passion for living. Why wouldn’t we want to be led by such a leader?

Yes, when we follow after Jesus, our lives will be different from those who do not. But it will be a good kind of different.

As Christ followers we:

Walk in the light

Jesus spoke to them, saying, "I am the light of the world. Whoever

follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.[56]

For so much of my life I stumbled around in the dark. I wanted “the good life” so desperately, but I didn’t have a clue how to get it.

I had no drive, no hope for a real future. I just let life happen to me. As a result, my world became darker and darker as the years went on. So dark, in fact, that I reached the point of giving up. But God never gave up on me.

As I look back over my life, I realize how many times He took my hand and led me out of those dark places.

Remember that God is no respecter of persons. Whoever we are and wherever we are, if we will but follow Jesus we will be led out of any dark place and into a life filled with hope, peace, and joy unspeakable.

Recognize Gods voice

The Lord passed by, and a great and strong wind rent the mountains and broke in pieces the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake; And after the earthquake a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire; and after the fire [a sound of gentle stillness and] a still, small voice. When Elijah heard the voice... [57]

God wants us to know his voice. It is a voice that will rapidly become familiar to us as we seek Him - through prayer, Bible reading, and so on. But we need to keep in mind that God will never tell us to do anything that is contrary to what He says in the Bible. So if one thinks that they are hearing God tell them to go steal their neighbors car, drive it over to his neighbor's wife’s job, ask her to marry them, and then kill her if she says no, well, they might want to take a quick peek at Exodus 20:1-17 (the Ten Commandments).

We also need to remember that God will never condemn us. God never tells us things like, “You’re so stupid,” or, “You’ll never amount to anything.” Contrary to popular belief, He is not an angry monster waiting to scream, yell, and smack us in the head when we mess up. He will, however, let us know when we are letting sin mess us up by getting us off track. And He will allow us to reap the consequences of our actions should we fail to heed his warnings.

Will be judged unfairly

If you find the godless world is hating you, remember it got its start hating me. If you lived on the world's terms, the world would love you as one of its own. But since I picked you to live on God's terms and no longer on the world's terms, the world is going to hate you. [58]

The Passion of the Christ was a hard movie for me to watch. Why? Because once I got past the fact that Jesus was suffering because of my sins, I was left with the fact that everything that happened to Him was just so unfair.

Jesus took those beatings not only knowing that they were undeserved but also without uttering a single defensive word. Isn’t that amazing? Think about it! They nailed Him to a cross and He did not yell, “Kill them all! Rain down fire and brimstones on their heads.” No, He actually prayed, “Father, forgive them. They know not what they do.”

In fact, the only ones Jesus defended were His enemies. And do you know what? He calls us, as His followers, to do the same. Jesus knew that being defensive would accomplish nothing. Defending ourselves is a waste of time and energy. When has getting angry or defensive ever helped a situation? We might think that telling someone off will make us feel better, but at what cost?

As Christians we are called to be an example to the world of Christ’s mercy to the world. If we spend all our time defending ourselves, we will have no time left over to love others as we are called to do. And I have yet to hear of anyone being won to Christ because of hatred and anger.

Are called to take up our cross daily

Then Jesus told his disciples, "If anyone would come after me,

let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.[59]

The Message Bible puts it this way

Then Jesus went to work on his disciples. “Anyone who intends to come with me has to let me lead. You're not in the driver's seat; I am. Don't run from suffering; embrace it. Follow me and I'll show you how. Self-help is no help at all. Self-sacrifice is the way, my way, to finding yourself, your true self. What kind of deal is it to get everything you want but lose yourself? What could you ever trade your soul for?

God wants all of us.

Yet, that can’t happen if we are bent on doing things our own way.

We need to give up the things God is calling us to give up so that we can be free to do what we were born to do.

In my experience, everything that God has called me to give up either wasted my time or was bad for me (caused me to be angry or stressed, or made me overweight). And though what He may be asking us to do may be hard, we need to remember that in the end it will bring us more joy than we could have ever imagined.

Are called to not ask why

Ask the average mother of a three-year-old and they will tell you there is one word they wish had never been invented: why. “Why is the sky blue?” “Why is the grass green?” “Why do you have such a big stomach?”

We are born with the yearning to understand. There is something in us that drives us to know the answers to important questions, such as “Why we are here?” and “Why do we have this hole inside that needs filling?”

Questions are good - I love to find out the “whys” of things. But the problem happens when we spend all of our time questioning. If God says jump, He expects us to jump first and only ask how high after our feet have left the ground.

Think of it like skydiving. We will never experience the freedom and thrill of experiencing life to the fullest if we never leave the plane.

Show signs of being a follower

The way to identify a tree or a person is

by the kind of fruit that is produced.[60]

I used to work in a very well-known and extremely busy store where the majority of the management tended to be gruff. As a result the morale of the employees suffered.

There was, however, a brief period when a new manager came to fill in. I could tell from the start that this guy was different. He smiled often and had a disarming presence. He was like a breath of fresh air.

As time went on, I noticed that he not only always had a kind word to say when talking individually to me and to each of my co-workers, but when he had to deal with an unpleasant situation he always did so with a positive attitude and without disrespecting anyone.

In his short time there he changed the overall feel of the place.

I overheard many people talking about how he was different than the other managers and they wondered why. Someone found out that he was a born-again Christian and people were impressed.

When it was time for him to leave, the employees bought him a cake to say thanks. This was surprising because paying for something for a manager was unheard of in that job.

But what was more surprising was that people were upset. There were some who even cried (really, I am not joking - they cried) because he was leaving.

That was some fruit he had produced!

That is how it is supposed to be! People are supposed to be affected by us, even if they don’t know why! So keep in mind that, as we grow closer to God, we will and should be changing.

So many people in the world today are overworked, underpaid, and unappreciated, and as a result just naturally tend to be negative and grumpy. So if we act differently, people will notice!

Are honored by God

Whoever serves me must follow me; and where I am, my servant also

will be. My Father will honor the one who serves me.[61]

Strong’s Hebrew and Greek Dictionaries says that the word “honor” means to prize or "to fix a valuation upon; by implication to revere: - honor, value." I like what the Matthew Henry Commentary had to say about this passage:

He (Jesus) will make them amends for all their (followers) pains and loss, by conferring an honor upon them, such as becomes a great God to give, but far beyond what such worthless worms of the earth could expect to receive. The rewarder is God himself, who takes the services done to the Lord Jesus as done to himself. The reward is honor, true lasting honor, the highest honor; it is the honor that comes from God.[62]

Think about it, God - the Creator of the universe - wants to give little old insignificant us value. And it is not the same kind of value the world dishes out. The world places value on what looks or acts good at the moment. Once a slight imperfection shows, or they get a hint that all that glitters is not gold…wham! Down comes the axe of judgment, and down goes the value of the person or object.

Thank goodness, though, that God’s way is not the world’s way. The value God places on us cannot be taken away by any scandal, imperfection, misjudgment, or flaw. No, God gives us value that no one or nothing can take away.

To Know God as father means that we must learn to follow His ways, for He says, "Anyone who intends to come with me has to let me lead” (Luke 9:23 MSG). And in doing so we will learn to hear the voice of our savoir softly calling, “Come, follow me and I will make you fishers of men." (Matthew 4:19 NIV).

Exemplify God

When I was a teenager I exemplified many people. Unfortunately, the people I chose to exemplify were wracked with insecurities and tended to make a lot of wrong choices.

But there was this one girl with whom I occasionally talked. From the outset we seemed to have nothing in common. I was into heavy metal; she was into Christian music. I was wild; she was calm and peaceful. I skipped school, drank, and did drugs; and she, well, didn’t.

I watched her and noticed that no matter what was going on she always seemed even. She was not up one day and down the next, like my friends and I. She also seemed to ooze peace from every pore of her body. Peace was something I desperately needed. Looking back, I wish she was the one whom I had chosen to exemplify. Not because she was perfect - no one is - but because she would have led me to a closer walk with God, which would have saved me years of following after things that had no life in them.

Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires (Galatians 5:19-24).

God says that we are supposed to be like a tree that is so full of good things to eat that people who pass by will get hungry for the things of God just by looking at us. The Bible says of a godly person:

He is like a tree planted by streams of water that yields its fruit

in its season, and its leaf does not wither. In all that he does, he prospers.[63]

Sounds pretty good, right? But remember, there is a process of events that have to take place over time before a tree is able to produce something worth swallowing, just like there is a process of events that must take place in our lives.

Things such as time, challenges, and most importantly interaction with Jesus must take place in our lives before we will be able to produce the fully ripened fruit of:

Love

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away.[64]

The Bible says it and we are called to walk it out in our daily lives. We need to ask ourselves, “how much am I willing to walk in love and deny my own urges to tear others down so that in my actions the blind may see the truth?”

Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love.[65]

God loves us, and not like a starlet loves her public. No, He loves us with a deep, passionate, and giving love.

For God so greatly loved and dearly prized the world that He [even] gave up His only begotten (unique) Son, so that whoever believes in (trusts in, clings to, relies on) Him shall not perish (come to destruction, be lost) but have eternal (everlasting) life.[66]

While the above verse is John 3:16, interestingly 1 John 3:16 says, "By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers." Wow!

Jesus laid down His life for us! Now that is love!

We are called to do the same for others.

Even if we feel as if we have no capacity at present to love others, we will find that as we follow God, He will fill us full of His love and then help us to walk it out in others’ lives.

Remember, what you do in love will never be done in vain. As 1 Corinthians 13:8 states: Love Never Fails.

Joy

How do we shine? By letting our joy - the joy that God has already given us- show.

You have loved righteousness and hated wickedness. Therefore God, your God, has anointed you with the oil of gladness beyond your companions.[67]

With the state of the world today, many may wonder what there is to be joyful about.

Here are a few things that we as followers of Christ have to find our joy in:

We have been justified - completely forgiven and made righteous (See Romans 5:1). We are free forever from condemnation (See Romans 8:1). We have been given the mind of Christ (See 1 Cor. 2:16). We have been established, anointed, and sealed by God in Christ, and we have been given the Holy Spirit as a pledge guaranteeing our inheritance to come (See 2 Cor. 1:21 Ephes. 1: 13, 14). We have been blessed with every spiritual blessing (See Ephes. 1: 3). We were chosen in Christ before the foundation of the world to be holy and without blame before him (See Ephes. 1:4). We were predestined--determined by GOD--to be adopted as GOD's sons and daughters (See Ephesians 1: 5).

So claim that joy, people, and shine.

Peace

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.[68]

We all have them - those terrible, horrible, want-to-run-away-and-hide, stinking, rotten days. Unfortunately, sometimes those days can run together in such a long line that we can forget what having a good day was even like.

It is in those times that it is easy to forget that our peace was never meant to be conditional, - based on what was going on around us. We don’t just get our peace when everything is hunky-dory (oh yeah, I said it). We get our peace from Jesus and Jesus alone. He is "the God of peace" (Hebrews 13:20).

That is why it is so very important that we fellowship with God at the start of every day. The peace God during that morning time is all we need to keep calm during the day.

Patience

Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience.[69]

America is a very fast-paced society, and patience is rapidly becoming a lost virtue as a result. I am very familiar with patience as I have struggled with a lack of it for almost as long as I can remember.

I don’t like having to wait for anything. But as a Christian I know that I no longer live by my own rules. As 1st Corinthians 6:19 -20 tells me: You are not your own. for you were bought with a price.

So if I am called to be patient, then I better figure out how to “get me some.” But how?

Unfortunately, we cannot buy a box of patience at the store, ingest it, and suddenly become Super-Patient-Woman (or man). No, the only way we can get patience is to pray, “Lord, teach me to be patient,” and then hold on to our hats as God brings situations into our life to cause our patience to grow.

As we learn to turn to God for strength during those times, we will watch ourselves no longer needing “it” right now because we realize that we always and forever have “Him” whenever we need Him.

Kindness

God's kindness is intended to lead you to repent

(to change your mind and inner man to accept God's will).[70]

How lucky are we that God is a kind God!

I sure am grateful that every time I screw up - and it’s often (just ask my kids) - God is not waiting there with a big hammer ready to slam me over the head with it.

I am always amazed when I think of how good He has been to me and my family. God’s kindness has led me to want to please Him by doing better than I have done in the past.

Quite simply, I am a child who just wants to please her daddy. And how do I please Him? Well, one surefire way is by following His example and being kind to others.

How, you may ask, do I show kindness to others?

Here are some ways: To speak a word of encouragement; to give to someone in need; to lend to a neighbor; to telephone or write to one who is in sorrow; to visit the sick or the aged; to befriend a lonely person; to lend a hand to a harassed friend, there are a hundred and one little ways to be kind to others.

Sometimes, though, the greatest act we can do in this fast-paced, stress-filled world is just to give a smile.

Goodness

Goodness, a fruit of the spirit? At first glance I was confused. Goodness and kindness are the same, aren’t they? Not exactly.

The Lord told me, “Kindness is what you do. Goodness is who you are.”

Now while Jesus tells us that “no one is Good but our father in Heaven” (see Matthew 10:18). I believe that it is a characteristic that we are still to strive for.

Because as Children of God we want to be like our father who is good.

Faithfulness

Know therefore that the Lord your God is God, the faithful God  who keeps covenant and steadfast love with those who love him and keep his commandments, to a thousand generations.[71]

The other day, while riding the bus home, I noticed that at precisely the right time a mother duck pitter-pattered across the street with about ten of the cutest little baby ducklings I have ever seen. Though the cars may have looked and sounded scary to the ducklings, they kept their eyes on Mama, knowing that she would faithfully lead them to a better place.

That is how faithful God is. Sometimes this world can get scary or it can just plain suck, but if we will just keep our eyes on God, He promises to get us through to the other side.

Gentleness

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.[72]

How many times have we missed an opportunity or brought trouble upon ourselves because we spoke harsh words instead of gentle ones?

I know from my own life how important a gentle nature is.

There have been more times than I can count where I missed an important opportunity because I got angry.

There was one time when my family was all going to go on an outing together. One of the family members got upset about something, and instead of answering them gently, I got angry. One thing led to another, and eventually the outing was cancelled because everyone was too upset with each other.

Isaiah 42:2-3 says of Jesus that "He will be gentle—he will not shout or raise his voice in public. He will not crush those who are weak or quench the smallest hope".

Satan knows that if he stirs up our anger, he can stop us from having any lasting joy. Anger traps so many people. Don’t fall for it. Be gentle on purpose. See the good in every situation. Live how Jesus lived.

Self-control

No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man.  God is faithful, and  he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.[73]

The world in which we are living in today is so out of control that the concept of self-control is almost non-existent.

Yet, we all are without excuse for sinning. God gave us self-control as a tool. It is with self-control that we are able to break free from the slavery of sin.

I ride the bus frequently, and I cannot believe the conversations that I overhear. Someone feels like robbing a house, so they do it. Someone else feels like cheating on their spouse, so they do it. Someone else feels like skipping school, so they do it. And so on.

They do not understand that God gave us the ability to display self-control because He loves us and wants us to have the most fulfilling life possible.

A man a without self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls.[74]

Take it from someone whose life was riddled with lack of control: you cannot let yourself always do what you want when you want, or you will not be fit for the work that God has called you to.

Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.[75]

So how about your fruit? Can you whip up a tasty batch of fruit salad with it to offer it to the world, or are the flies buzzing around your plums?

To Know God as Father means to know that “we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord's glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory,” (2 Corinthians 3:18 NIV). And it means to be able to say, “Not that I have already attained, or am already made perfect; but I press on" (Phil. 3:12 NKJV).

Love God

Long ago in the land of Uz (no, really, that’s the name, I’m not making it up), there once lived a very prosperous man named Job. In fact he was so prosperous that he was known as the greatest man among all the people of the East.

God had blessed him with seven thousand sheep, three thousand camels, five hundred yoke of oxen, five hundred donkeys, and a large number of servants.

But an even bigger blessing to him were the lives of his ten children (seven sons and three daughters), for whom he prayed often and loved deeply (see verse 2).

Yet to Job the greatest of all blessings in his life was his relationship with God.

Yes, Job was one very happy man, but not for long. For, you see, one day while God was in His heaven, some angles came to present themselves to Him, and Satan was with them (see verse 6). When God ask Satan where he came from, Satan said that he had been prowling the earth watching everything that went on (see verse 6).

One could almost see God puff up with pride and ask Satan, “Have you seen my boy Job? He is 'the man' - the best on earth. He is blameless, filled with integrity, and he loves Me with all that he is” (see verse 8).

"Of course he does," replied the enemy. "You’ve protected his children, his home and everything in it. And the icing on the cake is that You have made him prosper in all that he does. I bet if You took all of his pleasures away from him, he wouldn’t be so fond of You."

God responded, “Your wrong, and I will tell you why. Job takes delight in many things, but he takes delight in Me more than anything else. I will prove this to you by allowing you to strip him of everything that he holds dear on earth. Just don’t touch him.”

Satan, was thrilled to bring about Job's pain, and he quickly left and wreaked havoc on Job's life.

Soon after Job was visited by four messengers, one after another, telling him in essence that his children and everything he owned, were no more.

How did Job respond to the horrible news that his life had seemingly just fallen apart around him? The Bible says that Job "tore his robe and shaved his head" (Job 1:20).

It is easy for us to understand Jobs response. Job was in deep grief, and back when he lived tearing one's clothes and shaving one's head was their way of outwardly showing inward pain. It makes sense.

However what Job said afterward was both astonishing and not easily grasped.

Yet, it was something that we can all learn from.

Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked shall I return. The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.[76]

Whoa! Back it up! Are you serious? Did Job just praise God after losing everything he had? Yes, because Job knew the key. He knew that this life is temporary, stuff is just stuff, and you haven't lost everything as long as you still have God.

This beginning to the book of Job ends with the following: In all this Job did not sin or charge God with wrong (Job 1:22). He could easily have cursed God, but because he loved God, he chose not to.

Job went on to suffer so much more, and if you haven’t done so yet, I encourage you to read his story (in the book of the Bible by the same name), because it shows so clearly that even though we will have highs and lows in our lives, if we stick with God we will come out the victor, just as Job was.

When all was said and done in Job’s life,

The Lord blessed the latter days of Job more than his beginning. And he had 14,000 sheep, 6,000 camels, 1,000 yoke of oxen, and 1,000 female donkeys.[77]

Now, I am not much of a math whiz, but it appears that Job was given double for his trouble. And God didn’t stop with just blessing him with stuff.

He had also seven sons and three daughters. ... And in all the land there were no women so beautiful as Job's daughters. And their father gave them an inheritance among their brothers.[78]

God even gave Job more children (and notice that he had exact number as before).

Of course, he could never have replaced the former ones, but nonetheless they were a blessing.

I find it interesting, too, that the scriptures note that his daughters were beautiful. That might just be in contrast to his other daughters' ugly behavior of "partying it up." Of course, God not only restored everything to Job, but He also gave him time to enjoy it all.

And after this Job lived 140 years, and saw his sons, and his sons' sons, four generations. And Job died, an old man, and full of days.[79]

Even though Job had one catastrophe after another, he choose to hold on to his love for God. Job made the right choice, too, as exemplified by Jesus' response to the following question:

“Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?”

And he [Jesus] said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment.”[80]

In order to understand about how important this commandment is, one only need to look back at when this command was first written.

It was the end of the Israelites' four hundred years in Egypt, which, at the time, was a land filled with all types of idols (and we ain’t talking American Idols).

God knew that He was going to take the Israelites on a journey through the wilderness. He knew that even though they should have gotten to the Promised Land in eleven days, it would end up taking them forty years. Why? They were sidetracked by their idols.

They forgot whose they were. And this, the most important of commands, was God’s heart cry for His children to return to Him.

Just like the Israelites, we live in a society that is permeated with false idols. We too are easily distracted from fellowshipping with God.

God knows us well.

So although this is a command, He gave it to us in the spirit of a father instructing his child, with hands lovingly placed his shoulder and looking into his eyes saying, “Love Me with everything you have and all that you are and your life will not be wasted. There will be no more chasing after idols that will only let you down. Love Me with everything you have and, as you do so, I will set you free and you will experience a rest and peace that you never imagined. Dear child, it is because I love you so very much that I give you this command! And as you keep your eyes on Me, you will learn what it really means to be free.”

God so much wants for us to know Him intimately.

He wants us to know him just as we do our closest ally.

I so often run into people who think they are close to God and yet show no signs of it. This breaks my heart because I know that God has such a better life for them than any life they might be leading on their own.

This is why I think it is important to periodically examine where we think that our relationship stands with God.

For example, I can say I know the president and I know my pastor and I know my husband. On the service they seem the same, but on closer inspection, I know who the president of America is only by what I read about him, see a news clip, etc. but to world the signs are clear that I really do not know him on a personal level at all. I don’t have his cell number, I don’t know any inside facts about him, we are not hanging out at the mall, and even though he will be in my fair city in a few days, unless something bizarre happens, I will not be meeting him for diner. The signs are clear: I do not know him. And I don’t have any proof to convince anyone otherwise. The relationship we have is president to citizen, and never the two shall meet.

Now take, for example, my pastor. I say I know him too, but are there signs? Well, like with the President, we do not tend to hang out together at the mall much, or at all really, but I do have a way to directly contact him when I need to. When my husband had been flown to Harborview (a sure sign of the end), I contacted my pastor, who came and met me in the emergency room. Together with my daughter and her boyfriend, we held hands in a circle around my husband’s bed and my pastor prayed over him. When we said amen, Allan (who had been non-responsive for a long time) made a noise in response; that was the last noise I ever heard him make.

Those would be some clear signs that I know Pastor Chris, but I do not know him in the intimate way that I did Allan.

Although this word intimate has been given a more provocative tone as of late, what it really means is to have a deeply trusting and personal relationship with someone. It is to have the deepest part of you know the deepest part of them, such as the relationship between parent and child, or between best friends.

I knew Allan for half my life, we went through a lot together, both good and bad. We really knew each other inside and out.

We spent approximately 7,665 days together so we knew each other's good and bad sides. If either of us had a bad day we knew that opening up about it was the quickest pathway to overcoming it.

And when he was away, I knew that if I needed to call him for any reason he would answer. I had the direct line to Allan, just as we all have a direct line to God.

So while with Mr. President, Mr. Pastor, and Mr. Cline I have had some type of relationship, the most important one was with husband, and the signs were there that this was an intimate relationship.

It is important to ask ourselves from time to time, Are the signs there that I have an intimate relationship with God? Can someone tell by how I live that He is important to me, or do my actions let them know that He is not?

This is scary for some people because they do not want God to have any special insight to them.

They are afraid to share their secrets with God for fear that He will reject them. Yet this could not be farther from the truth because God already knows us inside and out.

Nothing we are about is any surprise to him. His love for us is not conditional. He loves us with all he has and He wants us to do the same.

So what then does it look like for a person to love God with all they have within them? What kinds of signs would we see in such a person?

Filled with Love for God

The first sign is that we would be constantly overwhelmed with love for God.

It is the same kind of feeling as when we got our first boyfriend/girlfriend, our first car, our first home, or even our first iPod. Remember how we just wanted to be in the presence of the object of our desire. How many of us spent significant time just sitting in our car, in the garage breathing in that new car smell? Or holding the hand of our beloved and periodically sighing in happiness?

When we are in love, we want to spend as much time as possible with the object of our desire.

You spend time with what you love, period. And God is no exception. But the difference between that kind of love and my love for God is that while other types of love may die, my love and passion for God continues to grow.

Spending time with God

Another sign is that we would desire to spend time with God. If we really love God, then we will want to spend time with Him. He will not be someone that we try to avoid (like Aunt Harriet at the Christmas party). No, he will be someone that we will look forward to spending time with.

People often tell me that they wish they were closer to God, but they say that they are just “to busy” to do it. Let's face it. If we were to give up a television show or a video game, leave work at work, stay home from the club, or just don’t get on Face Book all the time (that’s right - I went there), and devote that time to God imagine how much closer to Him we would be.

I think we are getting somewhat lazy these days in thinking that it really doesn’t matter if we spend time with God. We say, “He knows my heart so it’s all good.” We think we can give God no time, but still hope to squeak into heaven anyway.

God wants us to want to spend time with Him, to ache when we realize that we haven’t fellowshipped with Him lately. He wants us to care about Him, not for what He can give us but for who He is. And let's face it, who He is…is a big deal.

We are blessed to be able to know Him. We should never forget how blessed we are that He would even want to spend time with us at all. Isaiah 57:15-21 (MSG) speaks of Gods reach to us.

A Message from the high and towering God, who lives in Eternity, whose name is Holy: "I live in the high and holy places, but also with the low-spirited, the spirit-crushed, And what I do is put new spirit in them, get them up and on their feet again.”

Think about that! God is “high and towering.” He “lives in eternity.” His Name is “holy.” And yet He chooses to live not only in “high and holy places,” but “also with the low-spirited, the spirit-crushed.”

How many kings and queens or presidents and cabinet members do you know of that choose to “live” with the lowly? It is one thing to visit, but God chooses to live with us. Does He have to? No. It is out of His awesomeness that He does so.

One cannot become intimate with God just because they say they love “the big G” or because they think that “Jesus is their homeboy.” No, wearing a tee-shirt or slapping a bumper sticker on one’s car does not replace one-on-one time with God, just like giving your wife a kiss on the way out to work does not replace actually time with her. I would even wager that if someone actually did talk to their spouse only two minutes a day, they would not be married for long.

Reflecting God

Another sign that we might be intimately connected with God would be visible with our lifestyles. God is holy, and when we really begin to have intimate fellowship with Him, we can’t help but act like Him. Why? Because just like a child copies his father, we should copy God.

This principle is clearly seen in teens, who upon receiving a mentor, completely turn their lives around. Why? Because they have someone that they want to make proud. If we really love God, we will want to make Him say about us what he said about Job, “Have you seen My boy/girl? He/she is a man/woman after My own heart.”

Praising God

Lastly, a sign of loving god is our willingness to open ourselves up and praise him. Our natural response to God’s position and love for us should be to realize what a privilege it is that we are even allowed in His presence, let alone be allowed to shower our love on Him. And like Job, He wants us to choose to praise Him even when the chips are down.

Will watching a TV reality show about a large Christian family, I was absolutely astonished at the husband's response when the matriarch of the family had a medical emergency. He was devastated but, with the cameras on him, he chose to (like Job) show his love for God by saying, “We praise God when the good things are happening, and we are going to praise God even through this difficult situation.”

When I look back on all of the things that God has done for me and all the situations beyond my control that He has brought me through, I cannot help give him praise. So praise really does rise out of our relationship with Him.

In conclusion, the signs that we are really loving God should include spending time with Him, wanting to be like Him, and the feelings of overwhelming love we have for Him. But the biggest sign of all is what we do when the chips are down. Do we curse God or praise Him?

To know God as Father means to know a love found nowhere else on earth. It is my deepest desire that you will “have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is”(Ephesians 3:18 NLT). In the words of Saint Augustine, to know God as Father means to realize “God loves each of us as if there were only one of us."

Serve God

If anyone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen.[81]

Once upon a time there lived a certain man, let's call him Dan.

Dan was a very busy man. He had work to do, places to go to, and people to see. He was a traveling man. And unfortunately for him, he lived in a time where traveling was mostly on foot and also very dangerous.

So, no surprise, good ole Dan got robbed.

Unfortunately he was robbed of everything on him (including his clothes) and was beaten up too. He was hurt so bad, in fact, that though he was breathing, he was not moving. Poor Dan!

Now after Dan had being lying there motionless for a while, along came a priest who saw that Dan lying there half dead.

Dan must have thought, “Wow I can’t believe my luck! A representative of God Himself has just arrived! Yeah, I am saved!”

But alas, Dan's hopes were soon dashed when, instead of helping him as he should have, the priest ignored him and actually crossed to the other side of the street!

A little later another religious man came by, but he too ignored Dan. He took no chances of contact with Dan. This religious man walked to the other side of the street.

At this point Dan surely thought, “I’m a goner for sure. If God's chosen people won’t help me then no one will.”

Then, as if out of the blue, there appeared a Samaritan. Not just any Samaritan. No, he was a "Good Samaritan" who was also on his way somewhere important.

Now Samaritans were "half Jewish" and so were looked down upon as a “less then” by those of full Jewish blood (such as the priests and other religious people).

It's funny how we are so quick to judge someone who is different, as someone who is “less than.” It happened all the way back in biblical times, and it still happening today.

I am sure that Dan's hopes were dashed yet again when he realized who was coming his way. But this Samaritan proved his worth.

When the Samaritan saw poor Dan, his heart went out to him, and unlike the priest, and the religious man, he went straight to him.

He covered him, bandaged his wounds, put him on his donkey and took him to an inn where he paid the inn keeper enough money to watch over and take care of poor old Dan. He also promised the innkeeper that he would be back on his return trip with more money if need be.

What a guy that Good Samaritan was! Yet he could not compare to the One who told this story all those thousands of years ago. The original storyteller was Jesus, for whom no one, alive or dead, can compare.

Jesus told the Parable of the Good Samaritan in response to the question asked by a young lawyer: "Who is my neighbor?"

But I am getting a little ahead of myself, so I will have back up a bit - all the way back to the last chapter, to the part where this parable was first introduced. As you remember, Jesus was asked, Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law? (Matthew 22:36). To which Jesus replied: Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment (verses 37-38).

Sounds pretty good to me.

Loving God is both a pleasure and a privilege, and something we all need to do.

And it is easy to imagine that that is the whole reason we are here on Planet Earth, to learn to love God. Yet that doesn't make a whole lot of sense, does it? If we were just here to learn to love God more, than wouldn't He have taken us up to heaven the moment we were saved? No, we must be here for something more, and that something is found in what Jesus said next: "the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself" (verse 39 NIV). So that is why the lawyer asked the question.

But why did Jesus respond with the story of the Good Samaritan? Because He knew that the lawyer asking the question was doing so because he wanted him to say that the only one who was defined as a neighbor was a fellow Jew.

In other words he wanted to make sure it was ok to go on treating gentiles poorly. And so Jesus responded with a story about two Jewish people who did not help a fellow Jew (presumably). Instead the Jew was helped by someone considered an outsider. Therefore, Jesus was responding that our neighbor is everyone.

How do we love others well?

For the rest of this chapter we will look at the following ways: treating others well, being the salt of the earth, using our gifts, and loving without restriction.

Treating others well

Whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them,

for this is  the Law and the Prophets.[82]

Okay, so I know that you have heard this a million times since you were a child, but when it comes to loving others, the Golden Rule is definitely the key.

The Message Bible says it best: Here is a simple, rule-of-thumb guide for behavior: Ask yourself what you want people to do for you, then grab the initiative and do it for them.[83] Simple, right? It should be, but it is not always as easy as it seems.

As an Example I offer up the following story:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The four-day retreat out to the country had left the young pastor feeling refreshed, energized, and ready to take on the world.

As he packed his belongings on the eve of his departure, he looked at his watch and realized that he needed to hurry if he was to find a place in town from where he could watch his favorite team in a competition for the championship.

It did not take him long to realize that the small town offered only one such place, and that place was the local bar.

The young pastor had only one thing on his mind when he entered that bar and that was to see his team win. All around him people were talking and laughing as they rooted for the home team. He was focused on the game, though, and did the best he could to block them out.

Yet there was one thing that he could not block out, and that was the prompting of the Holy Spirit to go and pray for a woman who appeared to be struggling with physical pain. all throughout his time there.

He had noticed her right away because she had been stooped over, when he entered the bar.

“Go to her,” the Holy Spirit prompted. “Pray for her.”

Shy, the young pastor was gripped with fear, and responded inwardly, “Not in front of all these people.” Then he focused once again on his game.

Later, he again felt a nudge in his spirit to go and pray for her. He turned and the same woman was holding on to a pole, arching her back. He noticed the pain on her face and told himself he would go to her, as soon as a commercial came on, though when it did he forgot.

Towards the end of the game, when the score was tied and the opposing team was in position of the ball, the woman came up and stood next to him.

“Hey, Charley, can you hand me the ice pack?” She asked.

“No problem. You know, you really should have that back of yours looked at,” The bartender responded as he grabbed the pack out of the cooler.

“Yeah, I know, but going to the doctor takes the one thing I don’t have a lot of, and that's money,” she replied, taking the icepack from him.

“Pray for her,” was the last urgent prompting of the Holy Spirit to the young pastor.

He was just about to, but then the cheers of the bar patrons brought his attention back to the game, where at just that moment his team intercepted the ball and headed down the field. He cheered along with the others as the player entered the goal line and made the touchdown that ended the game.

After high-fiving some fellow enthusiasts, he remembered the woman and turned to look for her. But she was gone.

He asked the bartender if he knew where she went.

“Home,” was the bartender's reply.

Sunken in sprit, the young pastor left the bar.

His team may have won the championship, but for that brief moment fear had caused him to lose the battle.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In that instance, following the Golden Rule would have allowed the young pastor to show the love of God to a hurting woman. But in the end, it was a lesson learned and one not easily forgotten.

I too have tasted the bitterness of regretting my actions more often than I care to admit. Yet I do offer up the following as one of the times where I thankfully heeded the Golden Rule.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the early morning hours of April 6th, 2008, while my late husband lay in the hospital, just hours from death.

I had just come out of an elevator after taking a much-needed break in the hospitals cafeteria. I headed over to where my twenty-year-old daughter and her boyfriend lay resting after a long night at his bedside. I woke them and told them to go in to see my husband; I was following them when God told me to stop. I instantly knew why.

She was a skinny little thing, no bigger than my daughter, and shaking from the horror of the night. I had seen her in passing and saw and felt her pain. Although she had a friend with her I knew that she needed more. She needed a word from God. And so on the occasions that I passed her I prayed for God to send her someone.

He did. He sent me.

There I was, going on my way into the room to say goodbye to the man with whom I had shared married life with for almost 19 years, and God stopped me. He used the gift that he placed in me to reach her in her deepest need.

It almost seems like a movie now when I think of how I stopped in my tracks and turned to the girl saying, “God wants you to know that he loves you.”

She came tearing out of her seat and flung herself into my arms, burying her sobbing face into my neck and holding onto me with all she had. I asked God for the words to say, and he gave them to me. There were many and my memory is dull, but I do remember they echoed God’s heart for her to be right with Him.

I held her for a long time, and when I released her I saw that her eyes were shining brightly. I do believe that in those precious moments God allowed me to be a servant for Him so that I might know some joy in my time of deepest sorrow.

One hour later, Allan passed away. When I came back into the hallway to wait for paperwork, the young woman was gone.

As I was leaving the hospital I prayed, “God, I really would like to see her again.” And right as I was going to step on to the elevator, she stepped off, still smiling, her eyes still shining.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So following the golden rule as essential to loving others as is being the salt.

Being the salt

We are told in Matthew 5:13 that we as Christians are the salt of the earth, which means that we are supposed to love people by adding flavor to the lives we touch. The non-Christians with whom we interact are supposed to notice that there is something different about how life tastes when they are around us. We are called to be the spice of life and use our gifts to love others. The following true story is that of a young Lady named Natalie Nicholson who has is doing just that. Listen as she tells her story.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I am simply a young, “nobody” that has been saved by the grace of God and loves the Lord with all my heart. In loving the Lord with all my heart, He has led me to minister fulltime in Mexico to love my neighbors as I do myself. Life is a beautiful adventure of love and this is my story.

Looking back at my childhood, it amazes me to think that a girl raised in a healthy Christian family could have felt the need to be loved and experience the depths of loneliness to the extreme of which I did. My family went to great measures to protect me; however the reality of the darkness and pain in the world around me was too intense for even an innocent girl like me to oversee. I can remember as a little girl crying out to God at night in sorrow—I wanted to see good overcome evil, and I yearned to be the hero that did it.

Although far from perfect God uses man, His creation, His body, to express and give His love to His children. When I was about ten years old, a special grandfather-like mentor named Billy Bickley entered my life. He showered me with love in a way that allowed me to truly experience and understand God’s unconditional love and grace. I gave my full heart and life to the Lord a few years later when Billy lost his battle to cancer. Contemplating the reality of eternal life drew me to my knees in repentance and full surrender. I was sixteen years old, a good girl, with big dreams to change the world for the better. Through Bill’s mentorship, I had personally experienced God’s love and all the lost puzzle pieces came together in my heart. With God’s love I felt whole. The day Billy went to heaven, it all clicked. The meaning of the cross meant so much more to me once I realized that God loved me so much, that He not only placed Billy in my life to show me His love but more importantly that He sent His one and only son Jesus Christ to save me from my sins. Through experiencing love it all began to make sense. Everything revolves around love.

The picture was now clear. God loved me and I loved Him. I no longer wanted to live for myself, but instead for Him. I no longer cried out asking to be a hero to the masses of this dark world, but instead I began asking the Lord our Savior, “Lord show me how to use my life to love. If I could even love just one person in my lifetime as Billy did me, my life would be worth it. Show me what your purpose is for my life!”

Before the Lord’s love filled my heart, I turned to drawing, painting, and creating as a child. Art was my passion, my refuge and ultimately brought me closer to our Creator. So when the pressures and expectations of the world overwhelmed me in thinking about college and my future, I sought the Lord. I knew He had placed my artistic abilities in me for a reason bigger than for my own pleasure and I was determined to figure out why.

As I surrendered my all to the Lord and began loving Him with all my heart my desires were no longer my own, but were now His. I began praying to know God’s will and purpose for my life, and night after night I begged Him to guide me. I was seventeen when He answered my prayers. The Lord gave me a dream one night while I was sleeping, that is still vivid and clear to this day. I stood at the entrance of a large warehouse, looking into an art studio full of street youth and gang members painting, singing and playing music. The glory of God rested heavy in that room, bringing a true sense of peace and unity. When I woke up I knew God had given me a mission: to open a youth art and music center and through love shine the light of Jesus into the darkness!

Now ten years later, the dream is a reality. Studio Del Creator is about to celebrate its two year anniversary. There is nothing more beautiful and fulfilling than living in God’s will. Don’t get me wrong, the journey has had more than its fair share of challenges filled with trials, heartaches and sacrifices… but the reward outweighs: I am blessed with a life full of joy, gained wisdom, a larger spiritual family, and even more love than I thought I would get to experience on this side of heaven. The journey isn’t so much about reaching “x” amount of teens, or even about teaching “x” amount of art or music classes… the journey is about love: first our Father’s love that was sent to us through his son Jesus Christ then later sent to us as a fruit of the Holy Spirit for us to share with the world one person at a time.

It’s a cycle; if my neighbor Billy hadn’t shown me love, it is possible that I would still be looking for God’s love. In falling in love with God, I now am so hungry to love my neighbors as myself. I simply want to be an instrument, a carrier of the very thing all humans are looking for—His love.

One day as we were comforting a neighborhood drug addict, our friend Jorge expressed through his tears of shame, “I’ve lived on this street all my life. I’ve watched this strip mall have its days of success and later its days of abandonment. Look at all the broken glass in the windows. Look, nothing is there anymore. I never imagined that God would send someone here that would reach out to me and care. The church closes its doors on me, the corner store doesn’t let me enter… who would’ve thought God would send angels to this rundown part of Tecate?” We continue to wait for the Lord to break Jorge’s drug addiction, but more than a year later, not only do we have an incredible relationship with Jorge, but we also are very close to all of his family and have seen each of them come to the Lord. They didn’t come to the studio because we invited them with flyers. We tried and it failed. They came because we knocked on their door, asked to be a part of the hurt in their lives, and began to show love to them in every way the Lord showed us to. Today there is laughter in their lives, healing and hope, all because the love of God has been introduced to their home.

Alicia, seventeen years old, practiced witchcraft for years. She came to the studio looking for a refuge, a safe and fun place to be with friends. The last thing she wanted to hear anything about was God. The church had judged her, rejected her and kicker her out. So we kept our mouths closed and through our actions spoiled her with the love of God. Suddenly she disappeared for a few months, later to find out that she got plugged into a Christ centered, loving church, where she gave her life to the Lord. One day she showed up on my front door step gleaming with joy to share with me her great news and to thank me for the love we had shown her. Today she is serving in the church and witnessing to her unbelieving friends, all for the sake of His love.

There has been an overwhelming sense of respect from the gangsters and street kids that have entered the studio doors. I have stood amongst potentially dangerous circles of people testifying the goodness of our Lord Jesus, feeling completely accepted because they know we love them with God’s pure love despite who they are, what they are a involved with, or what they’ve done.

Luis is a man that showed up one night in the studio and stood in the entrance leaning over a short stick. He was very thin, partially blind, dirty, and covered in his own urine. Drawn in by hearing our worship music from across the street, He began to cry saying over and over again, “I used to be a Christian, before I fell…” He didn’t ask for money, food, or water. He simply wanted help, a ride to any drug rehab center. It was late at night, dark, and no one else wanted to help him out. New to Tecate, Luis was in search of filling his empty soul. Rejected and alone, humbly he asked us for a simple act of love. Today he is getting his life in line with the Lord, actively serving God in a Christian rehab center here in Tecate.

One night I was driving home alone from the studio on a long, lonely dirt road when I noticed I was approaching a dark figure. It was well after midnight and I was thinking about how it was likely no one at home even noticed I still had yet to arrive. For a moment fear overcame me, until I realized it was a woman carrying blankets in her arms. Suddenly I was overwhelmed with compassion and love. What was she doing all alone in the middle of nowhere at this hour? I pulled over and asked. She shared that she was in the car of a friend who was drinking and driving on the highway a mile away, she had asked him to let her out of the car as she figured her chances of survival would be higher if she walked home. Out of love I asked her to get in and drove her home still another 10 minutes away. We talked about God and praised Him for His provision. I hate to think what could’ve happened to her if God hadn’t moved my heart out of fear and into love that night.

Three years ago, while I was serving in an orphanage I watched as a Mexican government car drove off with one of the orphan boys. I distinctly remember praying and asking God to allow me to see that special boy again someday in my lifetime. God answered my prayer a year and a half later when I ran into that boy in the streets next to the studio. He was 13 years old and on his own, finding acceptance in a small gang. God then allowed me to become a motherly-big sister figure in his life, bringing him into temporarily live with my male ministry team during a period of transition to help him get clean of the street life and back into school.

Love is an ongoing lesson and for the sake of love the Lord often brings us through trials until our heart is in line with His. Loving our neighbors as ourselves isn’t about loving when we feel most comfortable or best fit, rather it’s about constantly being available. A year ago I cringed at the idea of getting married and becoming a house parent to teenage boys. However, through a series of events such as the story mentioned above, the Lord has changed my heart and it is now one of my biggest dreams to someday house teenage boys when I am married.

It is incredible to compare my heart today with where it was a year ago. Only God could have made such a drastic change in my heart. The Lord constantly reminds me that when I first love Him, He will mold my heart and teach me how to then love my neighbors as myself. And honestly, there is nothing more rewarding and fulfilling than honoring the first two commandments.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Using our Gifts

First Peter 4:10 says, As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another,  as good stewards of God's varied grace. From this we learn two very important things; every person on the face of the earth has at least one God-given gift. And our gifts are not for ourselves to enjoy, but are given to us so that we may serve others.

So what specifically are these gifts?

While not exhaustive, the New Testament lists twenty.

I have included each below with a description. Unfortunately there is simply not time to go into depth on this topic, but I encourage everyone to Google “spiritual gifts test” and take one of the many free tests available to find out what gift(s) you have. They are listed below in no particular order.

Teaching: Teachers love to study and share what they have learned with the world through writing or speaking.

Administration: Administrators are good at organizing people and using resources in just the right way to make the best use of them in any given situation.

Evangelism: It is easy for those with this gift to share the gospel with great effect.

Leadership: Leaders are forward thinkers, trailblazers.

Giving: These are the ones who live to give their time and resources to further the gospel.

Wisdom: The ability to apply spiritual knowledge effectively.

Faith: These people have the ability to do what God says, when he says it, without worrying about it.

Prophecy: These are discerning people who are able to speak God’s truths into others' lives.

Healing: God works through healers to bring health to people.

Discernment: These people can easily tell the difference between truth and error.

Compassion: These people have a heart for helping hurting people.

Shepherding: Shepherds oversee and guide people - like a pastor.

Miracles: These people can do amazing things in God’s name that all bring glory to God.

Exhortation: These people have the ability to strengthen and encourage others to go forward.

Interpretation and Tongues: The ability to worship and praise God in an unknown language is tongues, and interpretation is the ability to interpret what is being said or sung by the person speaking.

Apostleship: These people have the ability to start churches and oversee them.

Helper: These people help others with day-to-day tasks.

Knowledge: These people have the ability to accumulate and analyze information effectively.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We love others well by using out gifts. This is clearly illustrated in the parable of the Talents found in Matthew 15:14-29:

Again, it will be like a man going on a journey, who called his servants and entrusted his property to them. To one he gave five talents of money, to another two talents, and to another one talent, each according to his ability. Then he went on his journey. The man who had received the five talents went at once and put his money to work and gained five more. So also, the one with the two talents gained two more. But the man who had dug a hole in the ground and hid his master's money.

"After a long time the master of those servants returned and settled accounts with them. The man who had received the five talents brought the other five. 'Master,' he said, 'you entrusted me with five talents. See, I have gained five more.'

"His master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness!'

The man with the two talents also came. 'Master,' he said, 'you entrusted me with two talents; see, I have gained two more.'

His master replied, 'Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master's happiness!'

"Then the man who had received the one talent came. 'Master,' he said, 'I knew that you are a hard man, harvesting where you have not sown and gathering where you have not scattered seed. So I was afraid and went out and hid your talent in the ground. See, here is what belongs to you.'

"His master replied, 'You wicked, lazy servant! So you knew that I harvest where I have not sown and gather where I have not scattered seed? Well then, you should have put my money on deposit with the bankers, so that when I returned I would have received it back with interest.

Take the talent from him and give it to the one who has the ten talents. For everyone who has will be given more, and he will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what he has will be taken from him.

I know that passage well. Up until about ten years ago, I thought that my writing was for me to use or not use as I chose. Mostly I chose not to write.

Writing is hard work. And that combined with the fact that the enemy would often whisper in my ear, “Why write what no one will ever read?” made me give up as often as not.

But when I read that passage of scripture, my eyes were opened up and I realized that God gave me my talent for other people, to reach and teach them.

If I buried my talent, I would still get into Heaven, but once there I might just be devastated to learn of those who would have been there too had I used my gift.

In this competitive society we live in, it is often asked, "Which gift is the greatest?" It is important to keep in mind, however, that when talking about the gifts, the greatest gift of all is the gift that God gives to each one of us.

Loving without restriction

We cannot pick who we are to love, we as Christians are called to love everyone, just as Jesus did.

Now before the Feast of the Passover, when Jesus knew that his hour had come to depart out of this world to the Father, having loved his own who were in the world, he loved them to the end. During supper, when the devil had already put it into the heart of Judas Iscariot, Simon's son, to betray him.[84]

So here it was, the Last Supper, or as we would say in today's vernacular "the season finale" and Jesus chose to spend it with those closest to Him on earth - His disciples.

Among them was Judas, a man who, though blessed enough to be in the inner circle, had set his mind to betray Jesus, yet Jesus still loved him, as evidenced by what he did next:

Jesus rose from supper. He laid aside his outer garments, and taking a towel, tied it around his waist. Then he poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples' feet and to wipe them with the towel that was wrapped around him.[85]

So Jesus, who was a teacher and a leader, took on the role of a house servant and washed the feet of those whom He loved.

And even though He knew Judas would betray Him, He still washed his feet.

Because, Jesus loved everyone, even those He knew were set against him.

Jesus chose love, and He calls us to do the same.

When he had washed their feet and put on his outer garments and resumed his place, he said to them, “Do you understand what I have done to you? You call me Teacher and Lord, and you are right, for so I am. If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another's feet. 15For I have given you an example that you also should do just as I have done to you. Truly, truly, I say to you, a servant is not greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him. If you know these things, blessed are you if you do them.[86]

So if you want to live a blessed life, you must follow Jesus' example and serve others regardless of who they are. Remember, Jesus was never out to get what He could from people. He did not try and take advantage of the downtrodden in hopes of gaining power and prestige. No, Jesus came in power and yet humbly laid His life down and so that others may live.

He set a pattern as to how you are to life, and that is to love others well, just as He did. Mother Teresa once said "I try to give to the poor people for love what the rich could get for money. No, I wouldn't touch a leper for a thousand pounds; yet I willingly cure him for the love of God."

Yes, we are called to love well, but we cannot love others well unless we ourselves are filled to the brim with the Love that only God can give us.

In this book we have seen that no matter what type of father we have had on earth, God is our ultimate Father that never left us and is continually calling us unto Himself.

We have seen that our Father God is trustworthy and worth believing in. That we can know Him and that as we follow Him we ourselves will begin to exemplify his characteristics. And finally, as let ourselves be transformed by loving God, like Him, we will learn to love others well.

To know God as father means to hear Him say “If any of you wants to serve me, then follow me” (John 12:26). It means to know that as we follow him he is saying to us, "I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.  Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you.  You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart" (Jeremiah 29:11-14).

Other Books By Lisa Cline

31 Days to a More Apologetic You: Why defending Your faith matters

While most Christians believe that defending the truth should be left to the professionals, all Christians are called to give a defense to the hope that lies within them.

If you are a Christian who has shied away from defending your faith, afraid that it would be awkward or that you did not have the right tools to do so, read a page of this book for the next 31 days and see if those thoughts might change.

31 Days to a More Joyful You

Studies have shown that if you participate in a specific activity or behavior for twenty-one days in a row, you are forming a habit. So by focusing on joy for a full month (thirty-one days) you are solidifying that joy habit.

This book is therefore divided into thirty-one days. Each one includes a thought provoking quote or scripture, a small devotional, and a question or call to action to get you thinking more in depth about making the change to live in a life of Joy.

Author Info

Three neurotic cats, four amazing kids, a house full of books, a wonderful job, a swift bus, the World Wide Web, and awesome friends are what take up most of my day. And when I have an extra second, I love to jot down some words.

Born in Seattle Washington, I grew to love fresh air and a good cup of Joe. I also loved to write, and did so from the time I could hold a pencil.

Marriage and motherhood caused me to put writing on the back burner until the death of my best friend/spouse, brought it front and center again.

Through it all I have learned that writing is a gift I have been given, one that I am humbled to have received. And it is a gift that I plan on unwrapping for years to come.

I have also just received my Bachelors in Biblical Studies and Theology with a Minor in English and am looking forward to all that God has for me. If you have questions or comments please contact me at

lisacli@regent.edu

https://www.facebook.com/lcline

http://iamtrustinggod.com

One Last Thing…This Will Only Take A Moment

Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed this book or got anything positive out of it, I would very much appreciate if you could take the time to review it on Amazon.

Not only will your review encourage others to read this book, it will also encourage me to keep writing new devotionals.

The link below goes right to the review for this book. And leaving a review only takes a moment of your time.

Click this link for the review.

Thanks so much!

[1] Custodial Mothers and Fathers and Their Child Support: 2007, released by the U.S. Census Bureau in November, 2009

[2]Judges 11:2

[3]Judges 11:7

[4] (Judges 11:9-11)

[5]Judges 11:30-31

[6]Judges 11:34-35

[7]Romans 12:2 MSG

[8] According to childhellp.org

[9]Colossians 3:21 NIV

[10] (NIV).

[11] Isaiah 42:3 (AMP).

[12] (Luke 18:16)

[13] (Deuteronomy 31:6 AMP)

[14] (Nehemiah 9:17 AMP).

[15] Jacqueline Silvestri Banks, “4 ways to fight seasonal depression naturally.” FoxNews.com. (December 13, 2013). Retrieved from http://www.foxnews.com/health/2013/12/13/4-ways-to-fight-seasonal-depression-naturally/ Retrieved on December 19th, 2013

[16] Unknown 1900

[17] Joshua 7:19-21, 25-26.

[18] John 3:16 (KJV)

[19] John 15:15

[20]2 Corinthians 1:3-4

[21] Ephesians 4:29

[22] Col 3:21

[23] Matthew 7:11 CEV

[24]Philippians 4:6-7

[25] Genesis 11:27

[26]Genesis 11:28

[27]Genesis 11:31

[28] Genesis 11:27

[29] NIV

[30] Contemporary Illustrations For Preachers, Teachers, & Writers Editor Craig Brian Larson, Baker Books, p. 272.

[31]Isaiah 40:31

[32]Micah 7:5,6,7

[33] Proverbs 23:5 MSG

[34]Psalm 49:7,8,9 MSG

[35] Psalm 49:7-15 MSG

[36]Acts 15:20 MSG

[37]Jeremiah 39:18

[38]Psalm 125:1

[39]Proverbs 3:6

[40]1 Samuel 2:8

[41]Proverbs 29:25

[42] Anne Graham Lotz  Just Give me Jesus (Nashville, TN Thomas Nelson, April 11, 2000) 9.

[43] 1 Peter 1:24,25

[44] Dr. James Allan Francis “Arise Sir Knight!” in “The Real Jesus and Other Sermons” (Judson Press, Philadelphia, 1926) 123-124.

[45]John 14:6

[46]John 5:24

[47] Luke 5:8 NCV

[48] Luke 5:10 GW

[49] 1 Peter 3:3,4 God's Word

[50]Romans 10:9

[51]Mathew 6:33

[52] 1 Thessalonians 5:18 (NIV)

[53] Lewis B. Smedes

[54]Adam Clark Commentary on Matthew 18 (1832)Retrieved from: http://www.studylight.org/com/acc/view.cgi?book=mt&chapter=018

[55] Matthew 17:20 NLT

[56]John 8:12

[57]1 Kings 19:11-13 AMP

[58]John 15:18-19 MSG

[59]Matthew 16:24

[60]Matthew 7:20 NLT

[61]John 12:26

[62] God and Matthew Henry, Matthew Henry - the Bestselling Unabridged 6 Volume Complete Commentary On the Whole Bible (special Complete Edition): All 6 Volumes of the Bestselling... Exposition for Kindle Matthew Henry) (publication place: Christian Miracle Foundation Press, 2011).

[63]Psalm 1:3

[64]1 Cor. 13:4-8

[65]1John 4:8

[66]John 3:16 AMP

[67]Psalm 45:7

[68]John 14:27

[69]Colossians 3:12

[70]Romans 2:4 AMP

[71]Deuteronomy 7:9

[72]Proverbs 15:1 NIV

[73]1 Corinthians 10:113

[74]Proverbs 25:28

[75]Galatians 5:19-24

[76]Job 1:2

[77]Job 42:12

[78]Job 42:13, 15

[79]Job 16:16, 17

[80]Matthew 22:36-38

[81]1 John 4:29

[82]Matthew 7:12

[83] Matthew 7:12 MSG

[84]John 13:1-2

[85]John 13:4-5

[86]John 13:12-17

[i] John Wesley’s Commentary (Public Domain)

Table of Contents

Some are never there

Some Are Abusive

Some are Depressed

Some Never Stop Pressuring

Some are Greedy

Some are pretty good

When you are Devastated

Trust God

Believe God

Know God

Follow God

Exemplify God

Love God

Serve God

Other Books By Lisa Cline

Author Info

One Last Thing…This Will Only Take A Moment