THE TITUS 2 WOMAN

Learning to be a Godly woman.

Written and Published by Susan L. Godfrey

http://www.susangodfrey.com

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Cover design by Susan L. Godfrey.  Cover photo provided by daveparker on Flickr.

All Scripture taken from the King James Version Bible.

Definitions taken from the 1828 Webster’s Dictionary of American English

© 2011 | All rights reserved.

The Titus 2 Woman

Dedication:

Dedicated to my Mom, Kathy McNiel—

Thank you for setting such a good example for me on how to be a Godly woman.  It has affected my life more than you know.  I love you!

Contents

Introduction

Behaving as a Godly Woman

Honest and Gossip Free

Nothing in Excess

Teacher of Good Things

Sober Temperament

Love Your Husband

Love Your Children

Be Discreet

Pure of Mind

Keepers at Home

Virtuous Living

Conclusion

About the Author

Introduction

Finding women who have been trained to be Titus 2 women has gotten harder and harder in today’s world. This type of woman is truly becoming an endangered species! It’s a sad fact, but modern churches are just not teaching the “aged women” to become Titus 2 mentors and women just are not stepping up to mentor the younger women in the church. This is part of the reason I think so many of the young women in today’s church are floundering and turning away from Godly womanhood. They are just not being taught how to be Godly women. Too many churches today are pushing a twisted form of womanhood that has more in common with feminism and worldly standards than Godly standards. It is truly a sad state!

Just what traits does the Bible say a Godly woman should posses? Titus 2: 3-5 lays these traits out to us in a simple and plain way.

The aged women likewise, that [they be] in behavior as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, [To be] discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. -- Titus 2:3-5(KJV)

When you look at these verses, you can plainly see that what God requires from a Godly woman. They can be broken down into a list of eleven characteristics.

They behave in a holy way, suitable to a Godly woman.

They are not false accusers.

They are not given to too much wine.

They are teachers of good things.

They are sober.

They love and are submissive (obedient) to their husbands.

They love their children.

They are discreet.

They are chaste.

They are keepers at home.

They are good.

Indeed, this is a really tall order! Not only is a Godly woman to exhibit these traits, she is to teach them to the younger women. This includes not only her own daughters, but also the young women in the church. There are many young women in our churches that do not have a Godly mother to lead them and we, as Godly women, should step up and guide these young ladies.

I also don’t think the “aged women” in Titus 2 means just an older woman. I think it also applies to those who are spiritually mature, no matter how old they are. Sure, an older woman has more life experience than a younger woman does, but in this day and age, very few of them are willing to act as a Godly mentor to younger women. Younger, less spiritually mature women have to take their mentoring wherever they can find it. Personally, I have a good friend whom I consider a Titus 2 mentor to me. She’s much younger than I am, but is so spiritually mature and has helped me to grow as a Godly woman in so many ways. I don’t think “aged” just means physical years, but also spiritual years.

We are going to dissect these eleven qualities to help us understand exactly what is expected of us as we grow and mature as Christians.

Behaving as a Godly Woman

Let's take a look at the first characteristic of a Titus 2 mentor. The Bible verse says that they should live in a holy way, suitable to a Godly woman. When you look at this part of these verses, you will see that the three most important words in this part of the scripture are: behavior, becometh (becoming), and holiness. According to the dictionary, they are defined as:

Behavior – Manner of behaving, whether good or bad; conduct; manners; carriage of one’s self, with respect to propriety, or morals; deportment.

Becoming – Fit; suitable; congruous; proper; graceful; belonging to the character, or adapted to circumstances; as, he speaks with becoming boldness; a dress is very becoming.

Holiness – The state of being holy; purity or integrity of moral character; freedom from sin; sanctity. Applied to the Supreme Being, holiness denotes perfect purity or integrity of moral character, one of his essential attributes.

A Titus 2 Mentor’s manner of behavior should be suitable or proper and should be pure and of high integrity. This is a woman that is beyond reproach. She lives her life in God’s will; she follows His commands. She is spiritually mature in her understanding of God’s Word and in her walk with the Lord. Her moral character is without question. This is a tall order!

How does a woman learn to have a behavior becoming holiness? How does a woman learn to be spiritually mature? The first order of business, I believe, is to start studying the Word of God! Everything we need to know to become spiritually mature can be found in the Bible! The Bible is God’s instruction book for Christians. How often to we put aside reading the Bible because we’re “too busy”? Reading the Bible daily needs to be a priority for all Christians; we need to MAKE the time. If we can make the time in our daily schedule to do other things we want to do, why can’t we make time to spend reading God’s Word? Go ahead, make the commitment! Start off slowly; commit to read 3 chapters per day. Set aside a time everyday and just do it! Psalms 119:105 says “Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path.” The Lord gives us guidance through His Word.

The second way we can become spiritually mature is through prayer. Through prayer, we keep an open communication with God. How many times do we forget to pray? Oh, sure we pray when there’s something major going on in our lives, but tend to forget to take the “little” things to Him. 1 Thessalonians 5:17 tells us to, “Pray without ceasing”. We should be in a constant state of prayer. What does this mean? Augustine of Hippo described this constant state of prayer as, “The Apostle Paul had a purpose in saying: ‘Pray without ceasing’. Are we then to ceaselessly bend our knees, to lie prostrate, or to lift up our hands? …. There is another, interior kind of prayer without ceasing, namely, the desire of the heart. … The constancy of your desire will itself be the ceaseless voice of your prayer.” An excellent book on the subject is The Practice of the Presence of God by Brother Lawrence. Brother Lawrence was a French monk who lived from 1611 to 1691. Brother Lawrence continually ‘practiced the presence of God’ while working with the pots and pans in his monastery’s kitchen. He shows us a way to ‘pray without ceasing’ while performing our routine daily required tasks. We should have a running conversation with the Lord on a daily basis. This can be hard to do sometimes, as we get busy and forget. Try starting of by saying a short prayer upon rising, before meals, at the beginning of each hour of the day, and at bedtime. These don’t have to be long prayers, just short little “thanks” or our daily concerns. God hears us and appreciates us taking the time to share our day with Him, no matter how boring!

The third way we become spiritually mature is by taking what we have learned through reading scripture and through prayer and actually APPLYING it to our lives. This can sometimes be the hardest part. This is the action that will set us apart from the world. We can read scripture and pray earnestly, but if we don’t apply what we learn, we are not really living in a manner becoming holiness. God wants complete and total submission. According to Luke 9:23 the Lord says “And he said to them all, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me.” We are to deny ourselves our wants and the things we think we need and accept God’s will for our lives and the things that he provides us with. Not only are we to accept these things, we should do so happily! God provides us with all that we truly need. “Things” are of little importance in God’s eyes. God honors obedience and submission to His Will. It’s hard to let go of the control we have over our lives, but that’s what God wants! He wants to be The Boss and until we let Him, we will never be Spiritually mature.

Honest and Gossip Free

The second characteristic of a Titus 2 woman is that they are not false accusers. First of all, let’s look at the two important words in this verse: false and accusers. The dictionary defines them as:

False – Not true; not conformable to fact; expressing what is contrary to that which exists, is done, said or thought. A false report communicates what is not done or said. A false accusation imputes to a person what he has not done or said. A false witness testifies what is not true. A false opinion is not according to truth or fact. The word is applicable to any subject, physical or moral.

Accuser – One who accuses or blames; an officer who prefers an accusation against another for some offense, in the name of the government, before a tribunal that has cognizance of the offense.

This characteristic is pretty straightforward. The Titus 2 Mentor is not a person given to idle gossip or telling falsehoods about others. She does not accuse or blame others falsely (give false witness). I also believe that this means she does not accuse or blame others for her faults or sins. Let’s take a look at what the Bible says about gossip and bearing false witness.   It actually says quite a bit!

1 Timothy 5:13 – And withal they learn [to be] idle, wandering about from house to house; and not only idle, but tattlers also and busybodies, speaking things which they ought not.

Leviticus 19:16 – Thou shalt not go up and down [as] a talebearer among thy people: neither shalt thou stand against the blood of thy neighbor: I [am] the LORD.

Proverbs 11:13 – A talebearer revealeth secrets: but he that is of a faithful spirit concealeth the matter.

Proverbs 18:8 – The words of a talebearer [are] as wounds, and they go down into the innermost parts of the belly.

Proverbs 26:20 – Where no wood is, [there] the fire goeth out: so where [there is] no talebearer, the strife ceaseth.

Exodus 20:16 – Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor.

Exodus 23:1 – Thou shalt not raise a false report: put not thine hand with the wicked to be an unrighteous witness.

Proverbs 6:19 – A false witness [that] speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren.

Proverbs 12:17 – [He that] speaketh truth sheweth forth righteousness: but a false witness deceit.

Proverbs 19:5 – A false witness shall not be unpunished, and [he that] speaketh lies shall not escape.

Matthew 15:19 – For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies:

As you can see, the Bible is very vocal when it come to gossip and bearing false witness. First of all, let’s take a look at what gossip is and why it’s so harmful.

Gossip is defined by the dictionary as “One who runs from house to house, tattling and telling news; an idle tattler.” We all have caught ourselves gossiping at one time or another, I know I have. In today’s world, we are surrounded by gossip on a daily basis. We see it in the check out lines at the stores we frequent as well as on the TV and radio; even the evening news is reporting more gossip than news at times! How many times have you caught yourself reading the headlines from the latest gossip magazines while standing in line to check out your groceries? I know I do it. Gossiping is such a common fault in women and nothing can tear a person down faster than malicious gossip. It’s so easy to get caught up in it. Women enjoy gossip for many reasons. For some it makes them feel superior and for others it’s just a way to relieve boredom. Whatever reason, scripture clearly points out that it’s wrong, and that no Godly woman should participate in gossip. If fact, I believe that when another person comes to you with gossip, that you should tell them that you don’t want to hear it and you should, in a kind manner, point out that gossip is wrong and that they should stop.

The second part of this is bearing false witness. Earlier we discussed the definition of false, ”Not true; not conformable to fact”. Let’s look at the definitions of bearing and witness.

Bearing – Supporting; carrying; producing.

Witness – To attest; to give testimony to; to testify to something.

The definition of bearing false witness is to bear testimony, to give evidence, support, carry or produce a fact that is not true. To sum it all up, it means not to tell lies. A Titus 2 mentor should be honest in her speech and her dealings. She should promote the truth and not lies. This also includes her personal life. She accepts her mistakes and takes credit for them. She does not try to place the blame on others. When we sin, we do so by our own choice. No one is holding a gun to our head forcing us to do so. A Godly woman will admit her sin and accept that it is hers and hers alone. She does not try to place the blame for her sin on someone or something else. She takes full credit for it. This is really important and is a true mark of a spiritually mature woman. It takes courage to face our sin and accept it as our own. We live in a “pass the buck” world, where people do not take responsibility for their own actions. It’s always someone else’s fault. God wants us to take responsibility for our sins. How can we ask for forgiveness for our sins when we don’t even acknowledge and repent of them?

A Titus 2 Mentor should be a woman that is not given to idle gossip. She is truthful and honest in all areas of her life. She takes the blame for her sins and accepts her faults and mistakes as her own.

Nothing in Excess

The third characteristic of a Titus 2 woman is that they are not given to too much wine. Well, this is pretty self-explanatory. A Godly woman should not drink excessive amounts of alcohol. It doesn’t state that we should give up all alcohol consumption, that is a personal choice. I personally don’t drink alcohol at all, but that’s my choice. As I thought more about this part of the scripture, I also thought that this might also apply to other areas of our lives. Are there other areas of “excess” in our lives? For some it may be food, for others, it might be “things” or even money. It can be described as greed, lust, gluttony, and addiction. There are a lot of words that describe the excessive love or need for something. God had repetitively told us that these things are wrong, unhealthy, and ungodly.

Matthew 23:25 – Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For ye make clean the outside of the cup and of the platter, but within they are full of extortion and excess.

Ephesians 5:18 – And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit;

1 Peter 4:3-5 – For the time past of [our] life may suffice us to have wrought the will of the Gentiles, when we walked in lasciviousness, lusts, excess of wine, revellings, banquetings, and abominable idolatries: Wherein they think it strange that ye run not with [them] to the same excess of riot, speaking evil of [you]: Who shall give account to him that is ready to judge the quick and the dead.

1 Timothy 6:9-11 – But they that will be rich fall into temptation and a snare, and [into] many foolish and hurtful lusts, which drown men in destruction and perdition. For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows. But thou, O man of God, flee these things; and follow after righteousness, godliness, faith, love, patience, meekness.

Galatians 5:16 – [This] I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh.

James 1:14 & 15 – But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed. Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death.

1 John 2:16 & 17 – For all that [is] in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world. And the world passeth away, and the lust thereof: but he that doeth the will of God abideth for ever.

From reading the Scripture, it’s fair to say that God expects all Christians to put away their worldly excess and lusts and turn their eyes onto Him and His ways. A Christian woman striving to be as the woman described in Titus 2 should avoid excess, not only of “wine”, but also those other “excess” of the world.

Teachers of Good Things

The fourth characteristic of a Titus 2 woman is that they are teachers of good things. In this part of the verses, the important words are teacher and good. Let’s look at how the dictionary defines these words.

Teacher – instructor; a preceptor; a tutor; one whose business or occupation is to instruct others.

Good – (1.) Valid; legally firm; not weak or defective; having strength adequate to its support; as a good title; a good deed; a good claim. (2.) Valid; sound; not weak, false or fallacious; as a good argument.  (3.) Complete or sufficiently perfect in its kind; having the physical qualities best adapted to its design and use; opposed to bad, imperfect, corrupted, impaired.

A Teacher of Good Things would be a person who teaches or instructs others in a way that is valid, sound and perfect. Their instruction is not false, not weak, not not corrupted or not impaired. In the case of a Titus 2 Mentor, their instruction manual is the perfect Word of God! A Titus 2 mentor teaches sound doctrine straight from the Bible. They do not teach the misleading or corrupted doctrine of the world.

Now, let’s take a look at what scripture says concerning a Christian’s instruction in the Lord’s Word.

Proverbs 1:3 – To receive the instruction of wisdom, justice, and judgment, and equity;

Proverbs 1:7 – The fear of the LORD [is] the beginning of knowledge: [but] fools despise wisdom and instruction.

Proverbs 5:23 – He shall die without instruction; and in the greatness of his folly he shall go astray.

Proverbs 8:33 – Hear instruction, and be wise, and refuse it not.

Proverbs 13:18 – Poverty and shame [shall be to] him that refuseth instruction: but he that regardeth reproof shall be honoured.

Proverbs 15:5 – A fool despiseth his father’s instruction: but he that regardeth reproof is prudent.

2 Timothy 3:16 – All scripture [is] given by inspiration of God, and [is] profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:

Psalms 119:11 – Thy word have I hid in mine heart, that I might not sin against thee.

Psalms 119:140 – Thy word [is] very pure: therefore thy servant loveth it.

John 17:17 – Sanctify them through thy truth: thy word is truth.

Matthew 28:20 – Teaching them to observe all things whatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you always, [even] unto the end of the world. Amen.

Scripture makes it very clear that we should follow His laws and instructions and not the world’s.  As a Titus 2 Mentor, we should not only teach His laws and instructions, but also LIVE them! We can’t just expect those we are teaching to “do as I say, not as I do”. Example is the best teacher. When we model our lives after what the Lord expects from us, others see us and want what they see for their own lives. By living in a worldly manner, we are not effective teachers, and we’re certainly not teachers of good things.

Sober Temperament

The fifth characteristic of a Titus 2 woman is that they are sober. Let’s first take a look at the definition of the word sober.

Sober – (1.) Temperate in the use of spiritous liquors; habitually temperate; as a sober man. (2.) Not intoxicated or overpowered by spiritous liquors; not drunken. (3.) Not mad or insane; not wild, visionary or heated with passion; having the regular exercise of cool dispassionate reason. (4.) Regular; calm; not under the influence of passion; as sober judgment. (5.) Serious; solemn; grave.

The word “sober” has a couple of different meanings. The first meaning that comes to mind is “Not intoxicated or overpowered by spirituous liquors; not drunken.” I don’t believe that this is what the Bible is specifically speaking about in this instance, especially in light of the fact that the verses we’re studying already talk about “Not Given to Too Much Wine”. I think that the Bible is talking more about a person’s temperament.

A person who has a sober temperament is self-controlled and disciplined. They know when to be serious. Their emotions or passions do not rule them. They think before they speak or act. This is what the Lord desires from us. He wants us to contemplate our actions; to make sure we are doing the Lord’s will, not our own. This is the “What Would Jesus Do?” mind set. As Christians, God desires us to live according to His Word. Even the best Christians have to struggle with their worldly side. Every day, we must choose to serve the Lord or the world and it can be a real struggle sometimes!

What does the Bible have to say about being sober? Let’s take a look.

1 Thessalonians 5:6 – Therefore let us not sleep, as do others; but let us watch and be sober.

1 Thessalonians 5:8 – But let us, who are of the day, be sober, putting on the breastplate of faith and love; and for a helmet, the hope of salvation.

1 Timothy 3:11 – Even so must their wives be grave, not slanderers, sober, faithful in all things.

1 Peter 1:13 – Wherefore gird up the loins of your mind, be sober, and hope to the end for the grace that is to be brought unto you at the revelation of Jesus Christ;

1 Peter 5:8 Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour:

Sometimes God asks us to reach outside of our comfort zone and this is where a sober mindset can be a real blessing. A sober person would take these incidents in stride, not become all excited or worried. God uses these moments to help us grow as Christians. These times can be painful, but when you look back over them, you can recognize how they made you grow. God tests our Faith, but he never tests us more than we can handle. We may not think we can handle it, but God knows differently! When we have struggles in our life, you can always find growth. How you handle these struggles shows your maturity or lack of maturity as a Christian. You cannot make good decisions while worked up, so a sober mindset is important.

Love Your Husband

The sixth characteristic of a Titus 2 woman is that they love their husbands. This one seems straightforward and easy, but many women find it hard to do. This means to love our husbands in both an emotional and physical sense. Looking to God’s Word for instructions on how to be the wife the Lord wants us to be is one of the best ways you can love your husband. I was never taught submission growing up, nor was I taught that my husband was my head, but in I Corinthians 11:3, the Bible says, “But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman [is] the man; and the head of Christ [is] God.” Search God’s Word for the answers and you will find them! I have learned that God commands wives to be submissive their husbands. The Dictionary defines Submissive as:

Submission – (1.) The act of submitting; the act of yielding to power or authority; surrender of the person and power to the control or government of another. (2.) Acknowledgment of inferiority or dependence; humble or suppliant behavior. (3.) Acknowledgment of a fault; confession or error. (4.) Obedience; compliance with the commands or laws of a superior. (5.) Resignation; a yielding of one’s will to the will or appointment of a superior without murmuring.

We can love our husbands by being submissive to them. When we are submissive to them, we are obeying God. When we are submissive we are allowing our husbands to be the men that God wants them to be. We show respect and honor to our husbands through submission. When we submit to our husbands, we are putting them before ourselves and looking to their needs before our own. What a great way to show our love for them!  This does not mean you have to be a doormat to your husband.  Nor does it mean that you should put up with physical or emotional abuse.  It also does not mean that you must do something your husband asks you to do that is a sin.  While our husbands are our “Heads”, they are not above Christ.

Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;  –Ephesians 5:25

God commands husbands to love their wives, IN THE SAME WAY as Christ loved the church.  This is a pretty tall order for husbands.  In a perfect Christian marriage, this is what happens.  But let’s face it, we’re all human and “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;” –Romans 3:23.  We all make mistakes.  Some of us are married to non- believers and are unequally yoked.  None of us measures up to Christ.  We cannot change our husbands, only the Lord can do that.  All we can do is change ourselves (with the Lord’s help).  Stop trying to make your husband into your ideal man (only God can do that!).  Think about yourself and look to see things in you that may need changing.  Pray about it and the Lord will show you the sinful areas in your own life that need work.  For every finger you have pointing out his sins, you have three more pointing out your sins.  Remember, you chose him to begin with, so there must have been something you loved about him! We need to accept our husbands just as they are. We women are always trying to change or improve our husbands, but I have learned the hard way, that this can only be done by the Lord. If there is something you don’t like about your husband, take it to the Lord in prayer. After all, He’s the ONLY one who can really change your husband’s heart.

If you are in a dangerous marriage, then your only recourse is to leave your husband and get into a safer environment.  I do not believe that the Lord intends for women to be abused by their husbands.  This is not a safe or healthy position to be in for you AND your children. Once safe, you then need to begin to pray with all your might for your husband to get help and find the Lord.

Another way to love our husbands is to pray for them. Pray for him daily. I have found that this makes all the difference. Don’t pray about all the long list of faults that run through your head. God knows his faults better than you ever could. Instead pray that he be in the right relationship with the Lord, that God does His will through him, that the Lord helps him make the right decisions for your family. You can also pray that the Lord shows you how to better love your husband and to help you love him the way that the Lord intended. It is so important to make your marriage a regular matter of prayer.

Be sure and let him know that you admire him and are thankful for all that he does. Many times, we forget to do this. When was the last time you thanked your husband for bringing home the income that supports your family? Go out of the way to praise him when he does the things on your “Honey Do List”. When he has an idea he really wants to do, encourage him. Be your husband’s cheerleader! Your husband is working for the betterment of the family, make sure he comes home to a pleasant home atmosphere.  Our husbands need encouragement.

There are just so many ways to show your husband your love, that I could fill hundreds of pages with them. You should make it a goal to show your love to your husband in some way on a daily basis. Notice, I said SHOW. This means not just a quick peck on the cheek and “I Love You” before he leaves for work. To show means ACTION. Do something to exhibit your love for him. Make him a special dinner, write him a love poem, fill his briefcase full of hundreds of little love notes, mow the lawn for him.  There are just so many ways you can do it, you just need to DO IT!

Another way to show your husband love is to teach your children to respect and honor him. A woman who loves her husband as the Lord intends, will have children who love, honor and respect their father. Make their Daddy their biggest earthly hero and very best buddy. He will certainly appreciate this! If you treat your husband with love, respect and honor, it will make him want to live up to your high esteem of him.  It will make him a better man, husband, and ultimately, a better Christian.

Ephesians 5:33 says, “Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.” According to the dictionary, reverence means:

Reverence – To regard with reverence; to regard with fear mingled with respect and affection

We are to give our husbands or respect and affection. He is the earthly lord and master of our homes and we should treat him as such.

Now, let’s look at 1 Corinthians 7:3, which says, “Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.”. Let’s look at the word benevolence.

Benevolence – The disposition to do good; good will; kindness; charitableness; the love, of mankind, accompanied with a desire to promote their happiness.

In this verse we are told to do good for our husbands, to show them kindness, love and we are to put their happiness above our own. These are all excellent ways to show our husbands that we love them.

There is no marriage on earth that is perfect because they are made up of imperfect people.  All we, as wives can do, is to try to follow what the Scripture tells us a wife should do and to pray for, love and support our husbands.

Love Your Children

The seventh characteristic of a Titus 2 woman is that they love their children. For most women this is something REALLY easy to do, especially when they are infants. When our children are small and innocent and depend on us for all their needs, we show our love by holding them, caring for them, and taking care of their needs. Babies are easy to love! There’s nothing like their smell, that soft cuddly skin; just typing this makes me smile in fond remembrance! But babies grow up. Then, at times, it’s down right hard to find something loveable about them!

As I write this, both of my boys are testing my patience on a daily basis! My eighteen-year-old is going through the typical teen rebellion and my seven-year-old is testing my patience through his daily antics. As a parent, it’s hard to admit, but there are times when I just don’t like my children. Don’t get me wrong, I love them dearly and would gladly give up my life for both of them, but at times they can be little terrorists! How can you show your love for them, even when they are stomping on your very last nerve?

I think the first way to show your love for them is to pray for them. I pray for my kids daily and ask the Lord to show them the right ways to behave, to help me have the patience I need and to keep them away from wrong influences. Let your kids know that you pray for them every day and encourage them to share prayer requests with you. Bow down with your kids and pray together for their needs. When your kids know you are praying for them, they sense your love and truly appreciate it.

Another way to show your love to your children is to discipline them and teach them to obey you. Ephesians 6:1-3 says, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honor thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise; That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.” Children need boundaries and limitations. When we discipline our children, we show them that we love them enough that we don’t want them to do wrong. We want to protect them from sinful actions and attitudes and we value them enough to ensure they learn how to live a Godly life. We are setting them on a course that will lead them their entire life.

The very best way to show your love to your children is to teach them to love and respect God. Proverbs 8:32 says, “Now therefore hearken unto me, O ye children: for blessed are they that keep my ways.” When we teach our children to obey us, we teach them to obey God. What a lasting legacy that is!

There are many other ways to show our love to our children. Make a special point to spend time with each of your children individually. Set aside time to go on special dates with each of your children. Take them to the zoo or out to eat at their favorite restaurant. Pull them into your lap and spend an afternoon reading stories. Plan a special project with them. My kids loved having their own gardens that my husband and I would help them work on during the growing season.

One of my favorite ways to show love for my kids is that I have made them each their own special scrapbooks. I enjoy the art of scrapbooking and it is such a fantastic way to show your love, as well as recall memories of events in the past. I have filled these scrapbooks full of my favorite photos, as well as journaling about the events and my feelings for them. My youngest often wants me to pull out his and read it, just like a storybook.

Go out of your way to make your children feel appreciated, loved and wanted. Hug them often, really listen to them, smile at them constantly; let your love for them radiate from you.

Be Discreet

The eighth characteristic of a Titus 2 woman is that they are discreet. Let’s look at the definition of discreet:

Discreet - Prudent; wise in avoiding errors or evil, and in selecting the best means to accomplish a purpose; circumspect; cautious; wary; not rash.

A Titus 2 woman is prudent, but what exactly does that mean? Let’s look at the definition of prudent and circumspect:

Prudent – Cautious; circumspect; practically wise; careful of the consequences of enterprises, measures or actions; cautious not to act when the end is of doubtful utility, or probably impracticable.

Circumspect – Cautious; prudent; watchful on all sides; examining carefully all the circumstances that may affect a determination, or a measure to be adopted.

From these definitions, we can gather that a Titus 2 woman is wise and cautious. She doesn’t do anything in a hurried or rash manner. This is a mature woman. She doesn’t make the rash mistakes of youth. She looks at a problem from all sides before making the best decision possible. She prays and thinks before she acts. She guards what she says and does and stops to consider her speech and actions before she does or says anything.

Let’s look at what the Bible says about the prudent person, to do that, we just need to turn to the book of Proverbs.:

Proverbs 12:16 – A fool’s wrath is presently known: but a prudent man covereth shame.

Proverbs 12:23 – A prudent man concealeth knowledge: but the heart of fools proclaimeth foolishness.

Proverbs 14:8 – The wisdom of the prudent is to understand his way: but the folly of fools is deceit.

Proverbs 16:21 – The wise in heart shall be called prudent: and the sweetness of the lips increaseth learning.

Proverbs 19:14 House and riches are the inheritance of fathers: and a prudent wife is from the LORD.

Proverbs 27:12 A prudent man foreseeth the evil, and hideth himself; but the simple pass on, and are punished.

A prudent woman will think before she speaks, therefore she will avoid shaming herself with words spoken in haste. She will research a subject to gain the knowledge she needs to make the correct decisions. A prudent woman makes sure she understands what she is doing and acts only when she is sure she is doing the correct thing. She foresees trouble and avoids it. This woman is an asset to her husband.

A Titus 2 woman is one that can be trusted to make good decisions based on fact and not emotion. She uses her head and does not let her emotions run away with her.

Pure of Mind

The ninth characteristic of a Titus 2 woman is that they are chaste. Let’s take a look at the definition of chaste.

Chaste – Pure from all unlawful commerce of sexes. Applied to persons before marriage, it signifies pure from all sexual commerce, undefiled; applied to married persons, true to the marriage bed.

A Titus 2 woman is undefiled and is pure from all sexual impurity. This means that an unmarried woman remains a virgin until she is married and a married woman is faithful to her husband. These women are honorable and trustworthy.

Chaste can also be defined as, “In language, pure; genuine; uncorrupt; free from barbarous words and phrases, and from quaint, affected, extravagant expressions.”

A Godly woman is chaste not only with her body, but also in her actions and speech. Her words are pure and genuine, not crude or rude. She is sweet and soft-spoken and would never utter a curse word or hateful thing. A Titus 2 woman exudes sweetness, innocence and purity. She keeps her body, mind and soul uncorrupted from sinful actions and thoughts.

This is a hard thing to accomplish in today’s society. We are constantly sent messages that we should “do your own thing” or “if it feels good then do it.” These messages are in conflict with Scripture. A world that is selfish and crude surrounds us–where sexual purity is a thing of the past. People are encouraged to pursue sexual pleasure wherever they can find it and with whomever they can find it with. What a sad state our world is in because of this!

If you are not faithful to your husband, how can you be expected to be honest in any area of your life? Our world encourages dishonesty. We are told that “little white lies” are okay, but this is contrary to Scripture. There is no way to ever justify a lie. A lie is just a lie and there’s no getting around that.

We are becoming desensitized to foul language and crude speech. Talk that was once considered offensive is now considered okay. Can you remember a time when you didn’t have to listen to cursing in public? How many times have you had to cover your children’s ears because of someone speaking inappropriately in public? This kind of speech and behavior not only offends us, but it offends God! God did not create our body and minds to speak and think in this manner. Sin and living in a fallen world did that.  He created us to praise and worship him—to build each other up with positive, encouraging and pure words.

Keepers at Home

The tenth characteristic of a Titus 2 woman is that they are keepers at home. I think this is God’s ideal for married women.  This is certainly a hard one in today’s society. Our world does not encourage women to be homemakers. They think of it as menial labor and should only be done by those who aren’t “smart” enough to do something else. There are also financial repercussions to living on one income. It is hard to do, but it can be done. The problem is that many families don’t want to give up material and worldly things to live according to God’s will. Yes, there are instances where a woman has to work to supply her family with the very basics of life. But, many women work solely so they can provide their family with material things that are not truly needed. Luke 12:34 says, “For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.” If you put more value on “things” then, there is no way you will ever have enough. You will always want more and more, you will never be satisfied.

I do believe that it is God’s plan for wives to be homemakers. To stay at home and take care of their family and homes. This is God’s ideal. But, just because you can’t stay home doesn’t mean that you’re not a Keeper at Home.  No matter whether we stay home or work, it is traditionally our job to make sure that our homes run smoothly. It’s pretty amazing to see all the things that an at-home wife and mom has to juggle. Homemaking is one of the hardest jobs any woman could ever have. She has to wear so many different hats--maid, cook, taxi driver, nurse, book-keeper, crisis management, and the list could go on. Why, a homemaker has many more jobs to keep up with than most CEO’s of large companies! Yet, the homemaker’s job is considered inconsequential. If you had to pay people to take over her duties, you would most likely be broke rather quickly. This doesn’t mean we can’t have the help of our husbands and children or that we have to do it ALL ourselves. Even the Proverbs 31 woman had servants.  There is nothing that says we have to do everything ourselves.  We can have help.  There’s nothing wrong with having other family members help us, nor is it wrong to hire help.  We are the managers of our home and it’s our responsibility to make sure it runs smoothly, whether we have help or not.

Part of the problem is, that women are not being taught how to be keepers at home. There are many girls who don’t even know the basics of cleaning or taking care of a home. Many don’t even know how to do the laundry! This is where a Titus 2 mentor could step in and really make a difference in the world. We need to teach our daughters and other young women in the church how to do these things. How to cook, clean, and manage a household. But, being a keeper at home is more than just being cook and housekeeper, it’s being the heart of the home. If a homemaker is joyful about her job, then her family and home will be joyful. The homemaker’s attitude makes all the difference and her attitude effects each and every person in the household.

How can you learn to be a good keeper at home? Pray and ask God to help you and ask Him to lead you to a Titus 2 woman who will be willing to take you under her wing. Sit down and make a list of your shortcomings. Are you a terrible cook? Find yourself a good cookbook that teaches you how to cook. Are you disorganized? There are tons of books that teach organization, buy one and start reading. The internet is a fantastic tool in this area. There are literally MILLIONS of sites that a homemaker will find educational and useful. The whole point is, find out your shortcomings in homemaking and improve upon them. Practice makes perfect. You need to rule your home and not let it rule you. Take the list of your shortcomings and put them in order of importance, and then start correcting the problems one by one. Don’t get frustrated; just take things one step at a time.

Virtuous Living

The eleventh characteristic of a Titus 2 woman is that they are good. Let’s take a look at the definition of good.

Good - Having moral qualities best adapted to its design and use, or the qualities which God’s law requires; virtuous; pious; religious; applied to persons, and opposed to bad, wicked, evil.

A Titus 2 woman should have high moral values. She is virtuous and lives a life that is up to God’s standards. But, being “good” isn’t enough. Being “good” will not get you into heaven. That can only be achieved through the grace of God. Just being “good” isn’t enough to qualify you as a Titus 2 woman. Only a true Christian can qualify at a Titus 2 woman. When you look for a Titus 2 mentor, look for a woman that is not only a good homemaker, wife and mother, look for one that lives and breathes to glorify God!

Nothing else matters. You can be the best homemaker in the world, have the most beautifully decorated house, the happiest husband and children, but if you don’t have Jesus Christ, you have NOTHING! Humans are just not complete without Him. Romans 3:10 says, “As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one:” Not one of us is “good” enough for heaven. The Bible tells us “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;” (Romans 3:23). We are all sinners and are deserving of Hell. Romans 6:23 says, “For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.” But we have hope through the sacrifice that Jesus made for us on the cross! The only way to achieve eternal life is through Christ, “Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.” (John 14:6). All we have to do is believe that Christ died for us, just look at what John 3:16-17 says:

“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved.”

What an amazing blessing God has given us! Even though we are terrible sinners and deserve Hell, God gave us a way out! A way that we can gain salvation from our sins and Hell. What a wonderful God we have.

What do we have to do to be saved? Read what Romans 10:9-11 has to say. “That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. For with the heart man believeth unto righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation. For the Scripture saith, Whosoever believeth on him shall not be ashamed.”

We need to confess that we are sinners (deserving of Hell), and we must believe with our whole hearts that Christ died for our salvation. How do we know that we’re saved? 2 Corinthians 5:17 says, “Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.” When we accept Christ as our savior, God gives us a brand new heart. Our life changes and our old sinful behaviors pass away. We repent from our sins; we honestly try with all our might to keep from sinning.  Yes, we will fall and yes we will continue to sin.  But each day we start over with the goal of living as sin free as we can.

God starts treating our sinful infections with His own antibiotic and our hearts, minds and souls start to heal. We start seeing changes in our attitudes and in the things that we do. We start living life as a different person. What an incredible blessing it is to be free of our sinful past!

Conclusion

The last part of the Scripture says that a Titus 2 woman will do this so “that the word of God be not blasphemed.” Let’s look at what the word blaspheme means.

Blaspheme – To speak of the Supreme Being in terms of impious irreverence; to revile or speak reproachfully of God, or the Holy Spirit.

When we as Christian women do not act as the women described in Titus 2, we are being blasphemous of our most Holy God! We are not showing God the respect that He deserves and desires. It’s as disrespectful as taking the Lord’s name in vain or cursing God. What a horrible spot to be in! What makes the situation worse is that many churches are teaching women to act differently from what Scripture tells them to act. And, if they’re not outright teaching women to do the wrong thing, they aren’t teaching anything at all. I have been in church my entire life and I had never been taught anything about Titus 2, Proverbs 31, or ANYTHING about wives being submissive to their husbands. I didn’t find out anything about any of this until I was in my mid-30’s! In my ignorance of the Scripture, I was being blasphemous to God and I know that there are many others out there like I was.

Churches have got to get back to Scripture and start teaching the congregations how to live as Christians. They have got to stop worrying about offending people and start SAVING SOULS! The Word of God is MEANT to offend the sinner. It is meant to point out their sins and make them think about them. Each and every one of us needs to prepare ourselves to be mentors to the younger generations. We need to live our lives for the Lord and set a good example for not only our families and friends, but for the whole world.

About the Author

Susan Godfrey is the author of this book, as well as the Homegrown Simplicity blog (http://www.homegrownsimplicity.com).  She has spent her entire life in Texas and currently resides on a small farm in rural central Texas.  Susan is married to the most wonderful of husbands and they have two handsome sons.

Susan is passionate about living the simple, country life and enjoys sharing that love with others. She believes in living simply and frugally.  Susan writes on many different topics, including homeschooling, homekeeping, natural health, organization, real foods, homesteading skills, gardening, cooking, frugality, simplicity, and about her faith.   You can find Susan at her website located at http://www.susangodfrey.com, her personal blog, http://www.homegrownsimplicity.com and on Twitter @homegrownsimple or @susangodfrey.

Table of Contents

Introduction

Behaving as a Godly Woman

Honest and Gossip Free

Nothing in Excess

Teacher of Good Things

Sober Temperament

Love Your Husband

Love Your Children

Be Discreet

Pure of Mind

Keepers at Home

Virtuous Living

Conclusion

About the Author